


Just Seconds Apart

by NeoCopperTechnology



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Age Difference, Alpha Seo Youngho | Johnny, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - High School, Background Relationships, Family Drama, Five year age difference, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Heat Sex, Knotting, M/M, Masturbation, Mentions of alcoholism, Mutual Pining, No Underage Sex, Omega Lee Taeyong, Slow Burn, Smut, Soulmates, Teacher Taeyong, Teacher-Student Relationship, True Mates, student johnny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2019-05-14
Packaged: 2019-10-01 04:54:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 128,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17237807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeoCopperTechnology/pseuds/NeoCopperTechnology
Summary: Johnny’s life has been a series of stops and starts. He moved in with his grandmother in Seoul to find a sense of normalcy. On the first day of his last year of high school, Johnny found someone in his class whose scent was so attractive to him he could barely think straight, but his search for normal is dashed again when he realized the scent he liked so much belonged to his homeroom teacher, Lee Taeyong.





	1. The First Week of School

**Author's Note:**

> This is a teacher/student story, but I just want to say right from the get-go that nothing illegal happens, and there's no statutory situation going on.  
> Can't spoil too much.  
> Love JohnYong. Love ABO. Making it happen.  
> If you read this part, I love you.  
> -Copper

Johnny tried to have an air of confidence about him as he stepped off the bus and saw the open gate of cement-walled school a half block ahead of him, but like most first days school, he was admittedly a little nervous. He wore the school blazer very well, mostly because Korea’s size large was just a _slight_ size too small for him, and he may have spent a little longer than he meant to preening himself in the mirror this morning.

He wanted to feel fresh as he finally entered his last year of high school, and his new haircut was definitely helping. His natural brunette hair was fine, but the glossy black dye-job and crisp new undercut he was sporting today made him feel new. The uniform’s black necktie was looped loosely around his collar, and the simple silver necklace chain he had on underneath could be seen. He finished his look with one hoop earring in his left ear and a color-pop in his shoes; a new pair of baby pink, high-top converse.

Johnny couldn’t help the slight tug at the corner of his lips when he noticed his fellow students watching him walk through campus. Johnny was a _big_ alpha and he still had a few years left to grow.

He flashed a quick smile at a couple girls near his locker, and the giggles and sweet smell of omega washed over him and stung his nose. Johnny spun open his locker, really only opening it to practice the combination, but he took a moment to clear his senses as he stared into the empty metal box.

Johnny never liked overly sweet omega scents. The perfumey scent of typical omega hormones made his nose crinkle. The ones that smelled like candy and syrup were the worst, in his opinion. _Fruity_ he could deal with, but _sugary_...

Johnny had never been a fan of sweets, even as a young kid.

The bell rang, and there were collective groans, whines, and grumbles from the throngs of teens. In ten minutes, the halls would be empty, and all the students would be in their seats ready, or not, to begin another year of school.

Johnny found his class just down the hall and around the corner from his locker. There were students lingering around outside the door, chatting, talking about what they did over the summer. Johnny brushed past a small group and felt all of their eyes on his back as he said a small ‘excuse me’ in Korean and made his way through the classroom door.

The classroom was that it smelled really, _really_ nice. His shoulders relaxed a little and he smiled to himself as he wandered further into the room. There were thirty desks, not including the teacher’s, and a speaking podium. A whiteboard, and an electronic smartboard were on the front wall. On the far side of the classroom, over the cabinets, there were large windows that let in natural sunlight. The blinds were drawn completely and the electric lights above them weren’t even turned on.

Each desk had a student’s name taped to the top left corner, indicating their seat. Johnny found his near the middle of the class and felt pleased over it. The center of the classroom was the least conspicuous. Easiest place to text and not be caught, still close enough to the board so he could see. _Hell_ , he could probably cheat on tests pretty well in this position too, if he needed to.

He slung his backpack over the back of his chair and took his seat, immediately planting his feet on the floor and pushing himself back to balance on the back legs of the chair. He took his cell phone out of his inner blazer pocket to check his texts.

He knew _one_ person at this school, and Johnny had studied all summer for the entrance exam for Seoul International High, hoping and praying he would get accepted and go to same school as his friend. Even though he and Jung Jaehyun hadn’t seen each other, or really even talked all that frequently, in _years_ , knowing just one person at school would help Johnny ease into Korean life. When Johnny got his acceptance letter, he was so proud of himself, and he emailed his friend almost immediately. A few weeks later, when Johnny found out he and Jaehyun had been placed into the same homeroom class, he was over the moon.

Johnny sent Jaehyun a text yesterday, which he didn’t get a response back from, and he sent another text just then asking him where he was. He wondered briefly if he needed to get himself a Korean cell phone…

He looked up and around the room again. There were a few more students in the classroom now, but the teacher still wasn’t there. Johnny let his chair legs fall back to the floor, and he started tapping his feet impatiently as he stared down at his phone, on the verge of becoming bored.

It only took a minute, but a familiar scent found its way into Johnny’s nose, and he looked up to pinpoint it. When his eyes fell on honey-blonde hair and wide shoulders, he didn’t realize it was his old friend until he saw the boy smile at another student.

He had aged nicely, no longer holding so much puppy fat from their boyhood; Jung Jaehyun’s dimples were unmistakable even after four years. He was talking to a small group of other boys, and they were all loitering near the edge of the classroom by the door. Johnny got up from his seat unabashed and excited to see his old friend. As he approached, he caught the eye of some of the boys in Jaehyun’s group.

Johnny crept up behind Jaehyun and winked at the grey-haired omega in the group before he spoke up in a teasing voice.

“ _Oh my god, Jeffrey, do you even look at your phone_?” Johnny whined jokingly.

Jaehyun’s head snapped around quickly at the nickname that only one person in the entire world would call him. His eyes were round with surprise, but then they disappeared into happy crescents as he beamed a smile.

“Johnny!” the beta laughed at him fondly and broke away from the rest of the group to hug his old friend. They clapped hands and pulled each other in quickly for a rough hug, when they parted, Jaehyun pulled a once over on him again.

“ _Dude, you got so tall_!” Jaehyun said in English, and Johnny shrugged smoothly, trying to look humble. Jaehyun stepped to the side of Johnny and introduced him to the small group. Jaehyun’s friends were from all over. Japan, Thailand, Korea, China… there was a reason this international high school was popular with foreigners.

“This is my American friend, Seo Youngho,” Jaehyun introduced respectfully. When Johnny went in to shake hands and bow, he corrected Jaehyun.

“Actually, I go by _Johnny_ ,” he introduced, pronouncing his English name for them, and he flashed a nice smile to Kim Doyoung, another beta, and the only person there who had yet to smile back at him. The two omegas in the group were each _made_ of smiles.

Johnny stood at the edge of the classroom chatting with Jaehyun and his friends as more students trickled in. The second bell was going to ring soon, but it seemed like they were going to take their time.

“I love your hair,” Johnny complimented the silver-haired omega in the group, “Can you have fun dyed hair at this school?” Johnny asked conversationally, “I heard that Korean high schools were pretty strict about that stuff,” he explained. Ten, the Thai boy with the _ridiculously_ long real name, nodded.

“ _If it’s a natural color_ ,” Ten said in perfect English and gave Johnny a sparkling white smile.

Johnny was listening to the Japanese boy Nakamoto Yuta chitter to Jaehyun when a warm smell washed through Johnny’s nose. One moment he was normal, but the second he inhaled that scent for the very first time, it felt like the wind had been punched out of his lungs. His whole frame turned to locate it, his eyes flitting across each person in the room, his brain nearly humming with the need to find the person who belonged to this scent.

It wasn’t necessarily a sweet scent, but there was a sweetness to it. Johnny likened it to freshly baked bread, pastries, or flour. Yeasty, buttery, and wheaty, with cinnamon and spices rolled into it. It was both earthly and _heavenly_. Johnny didn’t know a scent like this could ever have existed before today. It was so unique and new. So distinct, and alluring… it practically made his heart stop. The hair on the back of his neck stood on end and his spine straightened as he scanned the room quickly for the person responsible. His gaze darted around the many heads in the classroom. The teacher had just entered the room, and with him came a stream of students. In the rush, Johnny couldn’t discern whose scent belonged to whom.

“Students, please find your seats, the bell will ring shortly,” the teacher called above the chatter. Jaehyun clapped Johnny on the shoulder, snapping him out of his headspace, and he noticed the group had parted to find their seats.

Johnny was overly aware of his size right now as he made his way down the cramped isle to his center seat. He bumped shoulders with some kids on his way, and when he got into his chair, he was still quietly sniffing the air and the students around him. Sicheng, the Chinese boy who he was introduced to a few minutes ago, took the seat right next to Johnny and gave him a small smile.

“Mr. Lee is the best,” the other alpha whispered in a deep voice, “He basically taught me how to speak Korean last year. I’m thankful to be in his class this year,” his voice rumbled through Johnny’s ear and he nodded his head automatically, trying to silence his alpha brain begging him to locate the person whose scent caught him so viscously. It was the first time he had to force himself to focus like this, he had never been triggered by someone’s scent like this before today.

The teacher, who had his back to the class, was writing his name up on the whiteboard. Johnny couldn’t tell if their teacher was omega or beta just by looking at him. He was definitely not an alpha. The slender male had dusty brunette hair and wide brown eyes behind a pair of wire-rimmed glasses. He wore a white button up, and black tailored slacks, and a sweater vest with two golden peacocks on either side.

For a second, Johnny had to admire the crisp and off-beat outfit and was mildly impressed that their teacher had a sense of style besides khaki pants and dress shirts.

The teacher wrote his name three times on the board, first in Korean, then in Mandarin, and then in English. _Lee Taeyong_.

When the final bell rang, all the students who were sitting rose to their feet, and Johnny followed suit. When the bell quieted, the whole class bowed in unison and greeted “Good morning, Teacher,” robotically. Johnny smiled to himself, because even across the world, some things didn’t change.

“Good morning, students,” the teacher greeted, a smile blossoming on his pink lips, “To the new students, welcome, and to the returning students, welcome back. My name is Lee Taeyong, you may call me Mr. Lee. I’m going to take attendance now. When I call your name, please answer.”

Taeyong spoke evenly as he paced slowly around the front of the class, a tablet in one hand. He was very well spoken, and he didn’t rush too quickly through his words, which Johnny was thankful for. He read out the names of students one by one, checking them off as they answered.

With every name, Johnny was locating them and trying to sort out their scent, the teacher called his name and Johnny snapped his eyes forward and raised his hand.

“Seo Youngho.”

“Here,” Johnny called, “I go by a different name though.”

“Ah, thank you for mentioning that,” the teacher said to Johnny, but then looked over him and addressed the whole class, “If you have another name you prefer to go by, I will learn them later on in the week, for the first few days I’m going to go by the roll sheet, just to keep things simple.”

When Taeyong finished taking roll, he looked up and smiled.

“Good, everyone is here. Before we begin, does anyone have a problem with their current seating arrangement?” he called over them. There was a small murmur through the class, and a few students did raise their hands, requesting to be moved forward, or backward. Johnny didn’t make any move to raise his hand, he was fine with his seat, but the girl behind him raised her hand and Taeyong pointed to her. Johnny turned his head to see her too.

“Yes, um, I can’t see the board…” she murmured, then looked at Johnny, “you’re way too tall to be sitting in front of me,” she added. Johnny laughed good-naturedly, and half the class snickered along with them.

“Seo Youngho, do you have any problems sitting in the back row?” Taeyong asked, and Johnny shook his head and graciously got out of his center seat, peeling his name off the corner of the desk, and taking his backpack with him. The two kids behind him all moved up a seat, and Johnny took the last desk in the back, no longer sitting next to anyone in Jaehyun’s group. The back of the class was also good though, Johnny could still see the board and the teacher over the heads of the other students, and when he finally found out who smelled so nice, he was pretty sure he would be able to see them from his new seat.

The teacher paced the front of the class, going over school rules, and club activities as he went. His voice was actually quite soothing to Johnny’s ears. It was airy and clear, but still with a tenor to it. He was talking about the general school rules as he passed out stacks of stapled syllabuses for the students to hand back to each other. The scent was still clinging to Johnny’s subconscious, but he was able to put it aside and follow along as the teacher ran through the syllabus with them.

“At the top of the front page is my work email. I know some of you are living in dorms, or with international families. If you are sick, or need to miss school for any reason, or even have questions on assignments, please email me,” Taeyong explained, “If you’re living in international housing, your guardians cannot call in for you, you _have_ to email me. Do _not_ lose this sheet,” he stressed, “If you’re sick, what do you do?” he asked the class.

“Email you,” half of the class answered.

“What?” Taeyong prompted again and put his hand to his ear.

“Email you!” more of the class responded.

“Exactly!” Taeyong cheered, and moved on.

Johnny had his head down, following along as best he could. He was breathing quietly through his nose as he read, trying not to be distracted by whoever’s scent was sticking to him like this. He wondered if he was the only one affected, or if anyone else smelt the scent he did with such clarity.

Like a cloud crossing over the sun, the scent became a little thicker in Johnny’s nose. He looked up to see if something had changed, and his eyes fixed onto the only person in the room moving: the teacher. He had the syllabus in one hand and was walking down the aisle by the windows, closer to the back of the class, still reading aloud.

Johnny’s hair stood on end again.

Flags of distress started going off in his vision, and his heart pumped heavily in his chest. When he realized the lovely scent was getting progressively stronger the closer the teacher got to the back of the class, he started to feel panic.

Johnny’s gut twisted as he really took in Mr. Lee for the first time.

The teacher was _young_ , probably still in his early twenties, and his dark eyelashes matched his hair. His skin looked almost luminescent in the natural light from the windows and Johnny swallowed _hard_ , his throat instantly went dry right after.

With every step Taeyong got closer and the scent became nearly overwhelming in Johnny’s nose. He stopped hearing what the teacher was saying, and his ears started to ring. He had one hand in his lap gripping his thigh, grounding him, but Johnny’s heart beat like a hammer in his chest. This feeling was incredibly new and the irresistible scent of the other reached a fever pitch when he passed behind Johnny’s chair.

The alpha’s shoulders stiffened, and his heart felt like it had been plunged into ice cold water as his fear was realized, and the lovely scent that was bothering him so was finally placed to a person. The only person in the room he knew— with absolute certainty —he couldn’t touch.

Taeyong’s words faltered and he turned to look back for just a moment, and in that moment, Johnny turned his head to look up.

When their eyes caught each other’s for the very first time, Johnny’s brain stopped firing correctly. His breath stopped halfway through his nose, and he felt locked in his seat as the scent of the older omega really hit him, but all he wanted to do was _run_. Run up to Taeyong, run away from this classroom, this school, this whole _stupid_ country. This was a mistake. Johnny’s heart, for the first time, tried to reach out in a way it had never been able to before, and he could do nothing to stop it.

_‘Why?’_ was all he could think. This was a disaster, a misunderstanding; it couldn’t possibly be his _teacher_ who smelled this wonderful to him.

Taeyong’s eyes broke from Johnny’s first and he looked down at the floor for a half second as he cleared his throat, only to continue where he left off on the syllabus almost seamlessly. It felt like they lingered in that moment for minutes, but in real time it was only a second or two. The young teacher picked up his pace just a little, and he made his way back to the front of the classroom.

He watched Mr. Lee’s back as he walked away, already starting to memorize the cut of his hair over his ears, the taper of his little waist, and the way his shoulders seem a little too broad for a typical omega… but Johnny never liked typical omegas anyway.

He tried not to stare, but it was impossible not to. Johnny wasn’t sure how much information he actually processed that morning at school, all he really seemed to notice was how agonizingly pretty his teacher was. How sharp his cheekbones were, how lovely he looked when he smiled, the clear cadence of his voice.

Johnny tried not to let it show. He ate lunch with Jaehyun and his new friends inside the classroom. He laughed at jokes, talked about his summer, and stole glances at their teacher when he thought no one would notice. He didn’t know if the few times he caught Mr. Lee looking back at him made it better, or worse.

He went home to his grandmother in the evening and couldn’t shake his conflicting emotions. He fell asleep thinking about his fortune and misfortune. Johnny had had crushes before, but not like this. He was so used to the chase. Once he found someone he liked, he made the first move. He was persistent in his flirting and his affection, but this… this was territory was hopeless and out of bounds.

Taeyong and him… Johnny had to shake his head, because thoughts like that… there could never be Lee Taeyong and Johnny Seo. He was a teacher, for Christ’s sake. These emotions… he just can’t have them. Johnny decided that one day was enough and the fantasy had to stop before it even started, he steeled himself to shut his emotions down. Tomorrow would be a normal day. There would be no attraction. His teacher would be an average person, and Johnny would be an average student. There was no other conclusion.

 

~

 

On the second day of school, Johnny tried to wave it off as a freaky dream. A fluke. There was no captivating scent, there was no problem, and there couldn’t possibly be any attraction there. He tried to have this conviction as he walked onto campus, but the second he ambled through the door of the classroom, his mental preparation flew out the window as the teacher’s scent flooded over him once again.

It made his spine straighten unintentionally as he saw Lee Taeyong standing at his desk. Today he didn’t have glasses on.

He was wearing tan slacks, rolled at the cuff, and they seemed quite fitted on him. Johnny’s eyes trailed down to the white, pointed-toe shoes, and his pale exposed ankle. His ankles were so thin, his feet were probably so dainty with his shoes off. Johnny’s mind betrayed him as he wondered how small his hips and waist were under the tucked in white dress shirt. For a guilty, indulgent second, Johnny imagined picking him up with both hands and placing him up on the teacher’s desk, fitting himself between those slender thighs...

Taeyong looked up from his tablet, feeling eyes on him, and when Johnny saw the teacher look up, he ripped his eyes away quickly and made his way to his backrow seat, trying to remain cool, trying not to be noticed.

Later on in the morning, Taeyong announced that it was time for them all to go to the library so they could get their course textbooks, and the book that they were going to start reading for their literature hour. The students were chatting as they clambered out into the hall. Jaehyun bumped elbows with him once they were outside the classroom and he and Johnny trailed at the back of the class to talk amongst themselves.

“So, where are you living right now?” Jaehyun asked Johnny as Taeyong reminded students to be quiet and respectful of the other classes in session as they walked to the library on the second floor.

“I’m with my grandma,” Johnny explained with a happy smile, “My mom’s mom. She’s getting old and needs help around the house more now that my grandpa is gone. She’s got this junk room upstairs that’s now mine. It’s only a few bus stops away, too,” Johnny explained, happy to discuss anything other than what’s really on his mind. Jaehyun put a hand on his shoulder and stepped up onto his toes to mumble into Johnny’s ear.

“How is your _mom_?” Jaehyun stressed, his voice low with one eyebrow quirked in concern. Johnny let out a sigh, his whole frame rising and falling.

“ _A mess_ ,” Johnny answered honestly, “ _Like… I should have graduated high school last year, Jae. But I missed too many days because my mom kept forcing me to move time and again, or she was just too hammered to take me to school. I really needed my space._ ”

“ _From your dad too?_ ” Jaehyun asked, his English only a little bit forced.

“Eh,” Johnny shook his head, “ _Living with my dad is whatever, he’s indifferent, still wants me to take over his business, but it’s better than living with my mom. Like, I literally can’t be in the same time zone as her right now, you have no idea_.”

“You put… a whole ocean and a couple countries between you and your mother, just to finish high school… in _Korea_?” Jaehyun started out, but then finished apprehensively, “You might be a little insane.”

“ _Yup_ ,” Johnny replied, shaking his head, “I think... that this school year is going to be _tough_ ,” Johnny said out loud, a secret admission to himself, “but it’s going to feel worth it when I’m done and going to college, or whatever I decide to do.”

Someone hushed them as they got to the wide stairwell and the caravan of students started trodding up the stairs. The smell he could not get out of his mind got stronger, and Johnny stood up straight to crane his gaze over the heads of all the other students. Taeyong had stopped on the steps, and he was talking to another staff member passing the opposite way it seemed like.

Johnny tried not to stare, but he did.

Taeyong stood on the step below the other teacher, who was very clearly an alpha. The unintentional height difference, and the too friendly smile on the other teacher’s face made Johnny’s upper lip twitch. He forced his eyes to the back of the person in front of him, and he wished he was on Jaehyun’s other side as they walked past.

Now that his students were in front of him, Taeyong politely said an ‘ _I gotta go_ ,’ to the other staff member and followed behind Jaehyun, Johnny, and all the other students.

It made Johnny’s shoulders tense and he felt the hair on the back of his neck rise again. Jaehyun didn’t seem to notice Johnny’s dilemma, and their conversation quickly died because their teacher was around them now.

The library looked newly refurbished. There was brand new carpet, and desks with campus computers, empty tables, and many, many stacks of shelves filled with books.

Taeyong swept past them and Johnny’s eyes followed his svelte figure as he approached the librarian’s counter. They were each given a copy of their book list, specific to each student depending on what math, science, and language courses they were in. The librarians showed everyone where the textbooks were, and to get in line to check them all out once they’d gathered them all.

Johnny knew this was going to take a while and he turned back to Jaehyun, who had been joined by a few of the other familiar faces in his class, Ten, Yuta, and Sicheng.

They slowly made their way to go pick up their text books, all the while, Johnny’s eyes were taking in everything, while also scanning the room for their teacher, who was standing by a stack of red paperbacks on the librarian’s counter and talking quietly with the old woman behind the desk, the way his teacher stood on his toes as he leaned over the desk was too endearing.

They all were taking the same literature and history books, but Johnny had to wander to find his math and science books, and a grammar book for his bad grasp of written Hangul.

Johnny set his heavy stack of four textbooks down on an empty table as he looked on his book list to find the location of the final grammar book. He followed the numbers and got to an isle near the corner of the library. As he rounded the bend of the isle, his stomach lurched.

The smells of the library had masked Mr. Lee’s scent pretty well, but the second Johnny saw him, he knew who it was. He was at the very back corner of the aisle, on his toes again, reaching for the top shelf for a stack of paperback books.

Johnny ducked back behind the shelving, and looked down at his paper and realized the very shelf he needed to get to was at Taeyong’s feet. He debated turning around and getting the damn book in a minute when his teacher had cleared out of the area, but he heard Taeyong curse softly to himself and Johnny peered down the aisle again and watched Mr. Lee attempt to stand on the bottom shelf to get the last of the paper backs. He still was a little too short to reach, he dropped back down to the floor before he broke the bottom shelf.

Johnny swallowed and approached with unsure feet.

He cleared his throat and said a low ‘excuse me’, as he walked up into Taeyong’s space for the first time. His teacher jolted around, and sucked in a surprised breath through his nose, his scent sharpening for a split second, but Johnny forced himself to remain unfazed. Taeyong jumped to the side, his back bumping into the shelves, and Johnny avoided his eyes as knelt down to the floor and plucked the thin white grammar book out from its hiding place, checking the cover really quick to make sure it was the right volume.

Taeyong’s scent was nearly too much for him to handle and when Johnny stood again, he couldn’t help his eyes from finding Taeyong’s, and his teachers face followed his gaze as he stood up to his full height. Taeyong’s head tipped back and Johnny’s heart melted as he looked at those deep brown eyes as they widened and caught the light from the bulbs overhead.

He couldn’t believe how pulling Taeyong’s scent was to him. He couldn’t believe how easy it would be to reach out and touch him. He couldn’t believe these terribly guilty thoughts he was having about his _teacher_.

Taeyong’s eyes were such a dark brown but they were alight with emotion, curiosity, and surprise. Johnny had to remind himself to look away, staring into that face for too long could kill him inside. He broke their gaze and reached up for the five remaining red paperbacks, easily pulling them from the top shelf and lowering them down for his teacher to take. The sounds of the other students in the library faded into the background.

“These ones?” Johnny asked, his voice coming out like a rumble, only loud enough for the other to hear.

“Yes… thank you,” Taeyong answered stiffly as he looked away, blinking rapidly and focusing his eyes downward to reach for the books in Johnny’s hands. Their fingertips touched, and Johnny got a rush of electricity he didn’t need, and wanted nothing more than to touch him. To feel his hands and hold his shoulders and tighten his grip around him…

“S-Seo Youngho…?” Taeyong murmured. Johnny’s breath caught in his throat when Taeyong said his name.

“Mr, Lee?” Johnny answered, his voice still low.

“...Please do not sneak up on me like that again,” he requested with an even voice, but he swallowed at the end of his sentence.

Johnny’s brain ignited in gold at the very implication of a swallow like that, and a dangerous hope seeped into his mind, trying to flood his rational thought. His fingers tightened around the thin grammar book, and he could have sworn Taeyong’s ambrosial scent got just an increment stronger too.

If Taeyong wasn’t his teacher, Johnny would be throwing him a coy smile, tucking a lock of hair behind his ear. He would be turning up the charm, asking the lovely human being in front of him all the right questions to get him to blush, to laugh, to smile. Oh, _God_ , how much he wanted to see Taeyong smile at him, and to be the source of his laughter.

After a pause that was too long to not speak volumes, he felt himself swallow too.

He slipped his clammy hand into his pocket and kept his face even as he cleared his throat and found the voice to answer.

“I understand, Mr. Lee, and I apologize,” Johnny whispered again, bowed a little, and before another word could be exchanged Johnny ripped his eyes away and turned on his heel to walk out of the aisle. The second he got around the corner, his racing heart had him all but fleeing the library stacks. He took a few cooling breaths as he made his way back to his textbook pile, shaking off any extra scents and centering himself again. He slapped his grammar book onto the top of his stack and then hefted them all into one arm before he turned to find Jaehyun and his group again.

 

~

 

The reading assessment that took place on Wednesday was excruciating for the whole class. He understood now why there was a placement exam for SIHS, as well as an entrance exam.

Their teacher passed out stapled packets of the same short story in two versions, one in Hangul and one in English. He announced to the class that they were going to each read aloud, starting with the front of the class and going down the rows. Each student was going to read a couple sentences out loud, then let the next person go, and so on until they read both versions.

Johnny skipped the Korean version and skimmed the English version. It was a short story, a Romeo and Juliet motif, but with only four characters, and no deaths. It was simple writing too, probably meant for middle school or late elementary level. He flipped back to the Korean version and felt screwed staring at the squiggly mess that was Hangul. His parents raised him bilingual, and while his spoken Korean was great, his reading left much to be desired. There was no reason for him to learn how to read Hangul in Illinois.

Luckily, Johnny was in the back of the class and was able to hear others read before him, and he realized that he wasn’t the only one who had trouble reading in Korean.

Yuta, Ten, and Sicheng all fumbled over their sentences. In fact, most of the foreign students struggled in some way to read it. Johnny then understood why such a simple story was chosen. Doyoung, Jaehyun, and about five other students who were Korean natives were the only ones who read without complications.

Johnny struggled to follow along on the page. When it became his turn, he stood up like all the rest of the students did and he held the paper up with shaky hands as he read. It wasn’t really reading, so much as making out the syllables one right after the other. It was jarring on Johnny’s tongue, and had no flow. It made him cringe just a little bit.

After his read-through he looked up just before he sat down and he caught Taeyong’s eye, right before the teacher looked down and made a note on the file in front of him.

Reading the same story in English as a class twenty minutes later was a breeze for Johnny. He read his two sentences like a redemption for his pitiful Korean, and he made a point of speaking slowly and artfully. Again, just as he sat down, he looked up and saw Taeyong’s eyes boring into him, but only for a moment before the teacher looked down at his notes again and started jotting.

After the reading assessment, Taeyong put his notes on the desk and leaned back against it casually.

“So, how was that?” he asked the class and he got mixed reviews in the form of grunts and groans, and Taeyong smiled brightly, amused, “I know, I swear, I won’t make any of you read out loud again… for a week,” he said and put his palm up to swear his fidelity, earning a few polite laughs at his bad joke.

Taeyong went on to talk about the paperbacks they were going to read together in class, and about the building blocks of learning new languages. His speech, and the smile on his face as he strode around the front of the class while he taught was kind of… inspiring.

After going over the itinerary for the story, and passing out another packet to the class, Taeyong read the first chapter of their paperback out loud, instructing the class to follow along.

For the final hour of their literature period, Johnny slipped into a blissful state as he sat back and listened to Taeyong while he read. Taeyong’s voice was soft and silky, and Johnny ended up leaning forward and resting his chin in his hands. The book was open in front of him, but his head was ticked to the side, so he could see down the row of desks and gaze at their teacher, who was half sitting on the edge of his desk, with one leg bent up and the other extended to the floor.

The warm classroom was quiet as their teacher read to them, and Johnny sighed dejectedly when the bell rang.

 

~

 

Thursday was the day to sign up for club activities.

Jaehyun said he was going to sign up for music and dance, and even though Johnny wanted to join the music club with Jaehyun and most of their other friends, he decided he couldn’t because Taeyong was the staff member in charge of the music and dance club. So, Johnny opted for basketball instead, trying to put some distance in between him and his teacher so that he could maybe focus on something else instead of blocking out his warm scent and how nice he looked in the direct sunlight of their classroom windows.

When Jaehyun learned that Johnny was taking a sport, the beta switched his club idea at the last moment, turning to Johnny and swearing they were going to be in the same clubs that year. Johnny was so thankful for his friend.

Basketball ended up being the _perfect_ choice for a distraction. The first day it was just a big group of boys in school uniforms shooting baskets, laughing, and learning each other’s names. Jaehyun and Johnny stuck close, and it was the first time he felt close to normal again since the week started, not looking out for another person who he had no claim over. No teasing scents, just a group of rowdy multilingual boys throwing basketballs around and being loud in the gymnasium.

Johnny didn’t like sharing his older age, slightly ashamed that he would be turning twenty while still in high school, but when Jaehyun told them all:

“No, really, Johnny is everyone’s hyung,” the younger boys latched onto him almost immediately.

Suddenly, Johnny had a group, and it wasn’t just Jaehyun’s friends.

 

~

 

Friday felt different. There was a difference in the smells of the classroom when Johnny entered today. It wasn’t a new smell, just a different one. Johnny spared a glance at Taeyong before class started and realized that his smell, although still so alluring, was muted today. Johnny briefly wondered if he was tired, or maybe coming down with a cold… but Taeyong looked physically fine. He just smelled a little different.

Johnny had only known Taeyong for less than a week, but he loved to take note of his teacher’s outfits. The young teacher was the epitome of fashionable, and it was a guilty turn-on for Johnny. Taeyong’s high collared shirts, fancy belts, clean shoes, earrings, necklaces, bracelets. Today he was in a business suit, black on black, with a blazer and slacks. There was a short chain connected to pins on the corners of the lapel of his black dress shirt, adding a pop of silver accessory on a dark outfit.

He looked sharp, and even just doing his hair a little differently gave their teacher a cool vibe. Johnny tried not to hear the conversation when a group of girls came in right after him and started cooing and complimenting their teacher’s outfit so openly. Taeyong smiled as other students spoke up to comment too.

“Waaa, Mr. Lee, you’re so handsome today!”

“You look like you could be an idol!”

“You look like you’re going on a _date_ after work.”

Taeyong put his hand to his face in embarrassment for a second and Johnny burned quietly in his seat. The idea of Taeyong going on a date with someone, _anyone_ , made his stomach feel sick. He quickly brushed it off, telling himself that if Taeyong had a partner, that would be best, then Johnny wouldn’t have a reason to pine.

But the idea of someone else touching Taeyong made him want to throw up, and that guilty thought made him want to punish himself.

He looked up to the front of the class again and saw Taeyong laughing and thanking his students, his smile bright, even though Johnny could tell by the arch in his shoulders that he didn’t take compliments well. Even his smallest looks, given to somebody else, made Johnny feel envious; he was so full of compliments to give Taeyong, but he kept his mouth shut.

Taeyong was hard to ignore today. His scent was different, and his look was different. Johnny could let himself relax a little when classes changed over and he had to go to math and science on the other side of the school. Math was the same in every language, so he had no trouble with it. The scientific terms were harder, but he sat next to Doyoung in science class. The beta had taken a few days to warm up to Johnny, but now he was quietly helping the American student with the words he didn’t know.

Basketball today was a tour of the sports locker rooms, and a most interesting jersey fitting. Like his school uniform, the jersey was a little too tight for him, and the teacher who was the basketball coach had to order him a custom size. He loved the colors though. Black, white, and blue.

Jaehyun made him try on a size small, ‘ _Just for fun_ ,’ he said, while the coach walked into the office, out of site. Johnny’s more playful side came out instantly and he grinned the whole time, enjoying the hoots from the younger members as he took off his blazer and shirt again.

The small jersey was _comically_ small. It pinched his armpits, and showed the line of his tummy, like a crop top. He felt like he was wearing a jersey for a middle schooler.

“ _Wow_ ,” Jaehyun said sarcastically, unimpressed as Johnny flexed for the laughs, the teeny shirt riding up higher to show his belly button. Jaehyun’s chest and shoulders shook with laughter at Johnny’s antics, and the oldest turned his arms up to flex his shoulders.

The loud rip that followed as the seam popped under one of his arms had the whole locker room fall completely silent. Johnny froze, his smile dropped, and his eyes bugged out of his head with mortification. Then the whole team exploded into thunderous howls and laughter that echoed off all the metal.

The coach yelled at them all to quiet down, and Johnny ducked behind the lockers. He had to have Jaehyun help him peel the tiny shirt off him, to avoid ripping it any further. The group scuttled out of the locker rooms, feigning innocence, and still snickering as Johnny buttoned his shirt again and followed them back to the gym.

 

~

 

After club period, Johnny returned to his homeroom, and entered the class with a bottle of cold coffee in his hand that he purchased from the cafeteria downstairs. Today was the first day that classes were staying late for extended study, and Johnny had already told his grandma he was going to be home late that night.

The class was different again when he walked in, but this time, it was because there were a bunch of students there that weren’t in his homeroom class.

He recognized Mark and Lucas instantly, underclassmen from basketball, talking to Ten, Yuta, and Sicheng by the windows, and Johnny approached them first, making a point not to look anywhere near Taeyong.

“Hey,” he greeted and Lucas immediately grinned and greeted him in English, raising his hand for a high five, which Johnny was ready to return, “What are you two doing here?” he asked.

“ _We suck at reading Korean_ ,” Mark answered and they both held up the white grammar book that Johnny had in his desk right now. Johnny looked around the class and realized… there wasn’t one Korean native in the class.

“Mr. Lee is so good at teaching Korean,” Sicheng sighed appreciatively, and Johnny looked at the quiet Chinese alpha, “I couldn’t even introduce myself in Korean last year, but Mr. Lee helped me so much. I’m honestly so thankful to be in his class this year,” he admitted, “If you’re having trouble writing Korean, this is the best class for you.

Taeyong had them take their seats, and Johnny sat in his seat at the back of the class, but then realized that the number of students was much less than his normal homeroom. Taeyong called all the students to come sit close to the front, and Johnny moved up a few seats, Lucas and Mark deliberately took the seats on either side of him, and Taeyong took roll.

They started on page one of their grammar books, and Taeyong taught them all the alphabet. It felt a little juvenile, writing syllables over and over, singing the alphabet together, but Johnny realized that Lucas couldn’t write Korean at all, and Mark was _okay_ , better than Johnny, probably.

The sun started to go down, and Taeyong wandered over to the door of the classroom and flicked on the classroom lights for the first time. The fluorescent yellow lights buzzed softly as they came to life, and they made Taeyong’s bronze skin look like he was made of smooth plastic, not one imperfection. Johnny looked up to see Taeyong’s eyes catch his again, before the teacher looked away deliberately.

They’ve been doing that all week. Catching gazes then quickly looking away.

At the end of class at 6:30, when the sun had finally set, the final bell rang and Taeyong dismissed them, wishing them all a happy weekend. Johnny packed up his stuff and put his grammar book back in his desk, before taking his backpack up onto his shoulder.

“Seo Youngho,” Taeyong called, and Johnny’s back straightened immediately at being addressed deliberately, his wide eyes snapping up to his teacher, “Will you please stay back for a moment?”

Johnny nodded and gave his friends a look, before they ducked out of the classroom before him. Johnny slowly dragged his feet up to the front row of desks and took a seat at the very front and center desk.

Johnny had never felt intimidated by an omega before, but Taeyong’s gaze was locked with his, his eyebrows set, he didn’t look away this time, and it made Johnny feel like he was about to be under fire.

Taeyong didn’t seem anything like the blushing man this morning who couldn’t take a compliment. He had his hands in the pockets of his slacks, and his one leg crossed as he leaned back against his desk, his gaze was even as he stared Johnny down, and the student swallowed. His heart was hammering under his blazer.

When the last student left, and the door clicked shut, Taeyong shifted his legs and took in a breath through pretty lips. He reached his hand up to brush back his hair.

“We need to have a chat,” Taeyong started, and Johnny’s throat went dry as his heart plummeted at those words. He had been preparing himself to avoid situations like this all week. He had been ready to ignore this huge attraction for the rest of the _year_ for fuck’s sake, but as Taeyong was bringing it up now, Johnny suddenly felt cornered. He didn’t know if he was ready for a conversation like this.

“I’m not… even going to go into _details_ ,” Taeyong started and he looked up at the ceiling briefly, “There’s a gigantic white elephant in the room that no one notices but you and I, am I correct?” Johnny had his hands folded on top of the desk, and his knuckles clenched. He looked down at his hands, avoiding his teacher’s gaze. He never wanted to admit to anything, but in this moment he could only nod, admitting the one thing he was trying desperately to ignore and keep secret.

“I want to keep it that way. You are a student, and I am your teacher,” Taeyong said out loud and Johnny could only nod and agree, even though he knew this already, his heart felt like it was being stabbed inside his ribcage. Taeyong swallowed, and looked down at the floor, a flash of guilt clouded his face, “I tried to look into getting you transferred out of my class, but after the reading assessment yesterday, I realized that this is the best place for you, academically.”

“Thank you,” Johnny answered quietly, “and… I’m sorry if I’m causing you problems. I-I can’t lie and say I’m not… a little distracted, but… I came here from America to finish high school, and that’s my goal right now. I have to be focused on that,” Johnny shared.

Taeyong tipped his head to the side curiously and the alpha couldn’t believe how cute the older male could be, even while wearing an outfit that was borderline sexy.

“Do you have a goal for college?” he asked, turning the conversation. Johnny shook his head, and let his hair fall over his eyes.

“I left kind of a weird family situation behind in America, and I’m trying to have a fresh new start, to focus on myself and my grandmother… I don’t know what I want to do after high school, all I know is that I want to _finish_ high school,” Johnny admitted, and Taeyong nodded understandingly, Johnny looked up again, and tried not to make his expression seemed pained, “I don’t want to cause you unneeded stress, Mr. Lee... If you think I should be transferred to another class, then maybe I should be.”

Taeyong sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, his brows drawing in.

“That’s the problem. You _shouldn’t_ be in another class, being here with me is the best thing for you,” Taeyong said, the way he said it made Johnny’s heart twinge, “I’ll need your English comprehension when it comes to helping the other students later in the year, and I’m the best teacher at this school when it comes to teaching Hangul. But I need us to remain adults about this, Youngho. Your schooling is the most important thing, and this… _elephant..._ needs to be ignored.”

“My… my friends call me _Johnny_ ,” Johnny said quietly, looking down at his hands, and avoiding Taeyong’s stare.

“I’ve heard… but that might be a little too familiar, don’t you think?” Taeyong asked, and Johnny looked up into his face to answer, but couldn’t find the voice to. He looked back down again in defeat. All he wanted was to go home, and crawl into bed, and maybe cry if his grandmother went to bed early. Taeyong sighed and stood up to walk back behind his desk.

“I know this is a delicate situation,” Taeyong started, “but the repercussions of… _this_ , could _ruin_ my career and get you expelled. So, again… I’d like to be adults about this.”

“I understand,” Johnny answered again, “I don’t want to cause trouble. I wasn’t even going to… bring it up.”

“It had to be discussed,” Taeyong answered with finality, “We need to remain as we are now, with discretion and maturity.”

Johnny nodded again, and couldn’t look at his teacher, his eyes locked on his own hands. There was a somber moment between them before Taeyong spoke again.

“Thank you, Youngho. You may go now. Have a nice weekend.”

“Thank you, Mr. Lee. I hope you have a nice weekend too,” Johnny murmured politely just before he grabbed his backpack again and made his way to the door. He felt Taeyong’s eyes follow his form, and he exited the classroom quickly, shutting the door after him.

Even as he walked away, Taeyong’s scent lingered all over Johnny and tickled his nose, he couldn’t escape it. It filled his head and made him feel smaller than he ever had before. There were too many implications, too much reality. The very real difference in standing between the two made Johnny’s heart throb for something he knows he cannot have.


	2. A Trip Out of the City and Civvies Day

Over the weekend, Johnny busied himself with chores at his grandmother's house. In light of his hasty move to Korea the week before school, most of his things were still in boxes in the hallway downstairs. His grandma was widowed now, her husband had passed a year ago. She could have moved in with Johnny’s aunt after his passing, but she insisted on staying in the house that her girls had grown up in, saying it held too many memories.

His grandma’s house was cluttered now. The bedrooms in the back, which once belonged to his mom and aunt when they were young, were filled with boxes of mementos from the past. The closets were bursting with clothes in sealed in dry cleaning bags. Dated wedding dresses, traditional hanboks, and graduation outfits. Lots of sentimental things that wouldn’t have value to anyone but an eighty-year-old woman holding onto memories.

When Johnny moved in, he took the one bedroom on the second floor. It used to be his grandma’s sewing room, but it had been semi-converted into another junk room after she got too old to climb the stairs.

Johnny was actually impressed with how much crafting supplies the old woman had. Bolts of colorful cloths waiting to be turned into tablecloths, blankets, and handmade clothes. Knitting yarns in every conceivable color, spools of thread, cross stitch patterns, and boxes upon boxes of scrapbooks. Long forgotten pictures of relatives Johnny was too young to have ever met sitting away in boxes in the attic room. He had been living there for almost two weeks, and finally gotten around to moving her things out, and moving his things up.

Jaehyun had hit him up in the morning asking if he wanted to hang out, and Johnny enlisted his help in moving. Jaehyun didn’t seem to mind it so much, and Johnny was beyond grateful for the help. With two sets of strong hands, Johnny’s grandma sat back in her favorite chair with one of her cats in her lap as her grandson and his friend puttered and bumped up and down the stairs, moving boxes, and cleaning the upstairs bedroom and tiny bathroom.

Once the attic room was empty, it actually wasn’t all that small, it was just the boxes of ancient hats and trinkets that needed to be moved out before Johnny could work with the space given to him. The only things in the room were his bed, a second-hand desk, and his school uniform which was hanging up on the back of the door, out of the way. He didn’t even have a dresser yet, and his clothes were hanging out in laundry baskets, waiting to be put away.

“I can’t tell if these outfits are amazing, or terrible,” Jaehyun snickered as he pawed through a photo album while he sat on Johnny’s bed cross-legged as the older boy swept, “Look at this one!” he laughed and turned the book over to show Johnny a yellowing photo of Johnny’s mom and aunt in absolutely _atrocious_ outfits from the early nineties, baggy pants and grungy hair.

“Yikes. Both?” Johnny confirmed, and Jaehyun snickered, “Those matching jean jackets are great, but the MC Hammer pants can never be forgotten.”

“Awww look,” Jaehyun cooed as he turned the page, “ _Baby_ _John_ ,” he squealed in a cute voice, his face permanently dimpled as he looked through the photo album. Johnny looked up to see it too, and quirked an eyebrow at Jaehyun.

“I thought you were here to help me?”

“Technically, I asked if you wanted to hang out,” Jaehyun answered, “And it’s impossible for both of us to sweep at the same time. So, when you’re done with that, we can grab some food, and then finish bringing up the rest of your stuff,” Johnny let out a moan as Jaehyun reminded him that food existed.

They took a break to walk to the convenience store down the street, Johnny’s grandma promised dinner for them in a few hours, but Johnny was craving a soda and chips. As they were on their way back up the hill, Jaehyun’s shoulder bumped against his.

“I think Ten and Yuta are super into you,” he started, Johnny snickered.

“Ten and Yuta seem like they’re into any big, tall alpha,” he said, “Have they met Lucas yet?”

“Ten and Lucas were actually a thing for a little bit last year,” he mused, “Did you have someone back in America?”

“Nah,” Johnny said and looked down at his shoes for a second, his secret affection passing though his mind, “There were a few friends that I had some fun with, but no one serious,” Johnny sighed, “I don’t really know what I want, you know? I have no plans for college, I’m here just trying to finish high school… I want life to be simple…”

“Has your mom tried to contact you?” Jaehyun asked, changing the subject.

“Yeah, a couple times, but I’ve been at school every time she’s called. I wish she’d leave me _alone_ ,” Johnny groaned, “I super don’t want to talk about my parents. Let’s get back to my grandma’s, and find my PS4, and not think about family and school.”

“That sounds dope,” Jaehyun said and put a comforting hand on Johnny’s shoulder.

 

~

 

School became Johnny’s escape, and his own personal punishment at the same time.

Taeyong was a great teacher. He loved his subject, he loved the books he talks about, and he loved when his students spoke up and engaged in banter with him. Johnny used to love getting personal with his teachers in America, he loved to joke with them and know them as people but engaging with Taeyong at school… he feels like everyone can see him and all his emotions, it’s too risky.

So, Johnny doesn’t speak up or raise his hand. He watches others get close to Taeyong instead, cherishes when his smile brightens his face, and his eyes disappear into half-moons as he talks to his students.

Taeyong loves his work; it’s one of the first things Johnny realized was so undeniably attractive about him, not to mention his sense of style, his kind voice while he reads aloud, his encouragements to the foreign students when they succeeded in a new language…

Johnny denying his feelings for Lee Taeyong was impossible. Every time their eyes met in a room, Johnny could feel the pull in his chest, urging him forward, but he couldn’t. All he could do was watch Taeyong smile at everyone but him.

At least he had basketball. In the gymnasium, Johnny could let Taeyong leave his worried mind for a while. The smell of new rubber shoes, and freshly lacquered floors, and the different flavors of all the boys on the team really, really helped. Even if he still had his own reservations about not choosing music and dance, basketball was good for him.

The ragtag group of upper and underclassmen were still in the practice stages. Shooting baskets one by one, the coach judging where they were at skill-wise.

By the end of the week, they were doing skirmish games for practice, and Johnny felt more than capable when he easily dodged his classmates and jumped for the hoop, tossing the ball in almost effortlessly.

“Can someone trip him? This isn’t fair,” Haechan complained, his voice halfway between impressed and annoyed. Johnny laughed, his lopsided smirk coming out.

“Johnny!” Lucas called and threw the ball at him quickly. Johnny caught it and dribbled over to the hoop, in the last few steps, he made a powerful jump and slammed the ball through the ring. His hands caught on the hoop and he made a show of holding onto it, swaying off the floor for a moment, a secret smile of triumph on his face as the others hooted and howled.

Johnny dropped to the floor and turned to his team with a grin. Jaehyun had the ball next and he tossed it to Lucas.

“Your turn,” Jaehyun challenged. Lucas’ eyes glittered and the alpha smirked real wide as he copied Johnny’s move and jumped for the hoop with an audible growl. When Lucas succeeded, the rest of the boys all tried to make attempts, but more than half of them couldn’t even jump up to touch the hoop, let alone make a dunk.

The coach started yelling at Haechan, who had climbed onto Mark’s shoulders just to touch the rim. Mark and the other boys were laughing, and the whole gym felt happy and peaceful. Lucas slipped his arm around Johnny’s shoulder, the underclassmen almost as tall as Johnny.

“We’re gonna carry this team,” Lucas said, “When we finally play other schools. _You and me... MVP_!” he squawked and Johnny couldn’t help but snicker at how loud Lucas was, and how silly his patchwork English and Korean sounded. Johnny threw the other alpha down into a headlock, and soon the coach was yelling at the two of them too. Lucas was laughing madly, his deep voice cracking, and Johnny was grinning ear to ear.

 

~

 

The following weekend, Johnny asked his grandma if he could borrow her car on Sunday. It was Saturday night, and Johnny was hanging around downstairs as the wonderful smells of his grandmother’s cooking coaxed him down from the attic.

“What for?” she asked curiously.

“I want to go visit the house my parents had me in, before we moved to America,” he admitted. His grandma, the sweetest omega elder to ever exist, peered up at him curiously.

“That’s strange,” she admitted, “If someone lives at the house, you won’t be able to go inside.”

“I know. I don’t really want to go inside, I just want to see it, and take a picture,” he said, “I don’t remember the house, but I want to know where it is, and what it looks like, and I want to go out on a day trip by myself.”

“You were only two when your mother and father moved,” his grandma let out a sigh, “America was such a terrible influence on my daughter. I was afraid for you for so many years, Youngho-ah. Your father was hardly present and your mom…” she turned her eyes off the pan and looked at him, “Well, you know your mom,” she said and Johnny frowned, and nodded, understanding completely, “But look at you,” she beamed, bringing an air of pride over Johnny, “You’re so good. So kind, respectful, and mature… I’m very proud of my grandson,” she smiled, “Yes, you may take the car, but on your way back from your trip, would you please stop by the grocery store for me? I’ll give you some money and make you a list,” she answered.

Johnny agreed and thanked his grandma with a gentle hug as she finished preparing dinner. He did his homework on the dining room table as they ate together before she went to the living room to watch her nightly shows.

On the kitchen counter the following morning was the car keys to his grandma’s old sedan, a shopping list, and a few bills for food. Johnny pocketed it all and went out to the garage to get in the car, his camera bag over one shoulder.

Johnny felt at ease as he started up the car and pulled out onto the street. He turned on the radio and flipped channels until he found one that was acceptable. The car had a tape player, that’s how old and dated it was, and Johnny made a mental note to find an electronics store to buy himself a cassette auxiliary adapter.

Johnny had texted his dad earlier in the week asking for the address of the old house. His father didn’t ask questions, didn’t really care, he just sent the address in a text, making it easy for Johnny to copy and paste it into his maps. He had asked to borrow the car today because he knew his parents lived outside of Seoul for the first two years of his life, and he wasn’t familiar enough with the city bus system to confidently take public transit outside the city yet.

His drive was about forty minutes, so not too long at all. He knew that Jaehyun would have been down to come along for the ride, but Johnny kind of wanted to do this alone as he walked down a memory lane he couldn’t quite recall.

The town he drove through was cute and green, there were lots of plants and flowers on the side of the road, and the street lights were hanging by wires over the older, cracked roads. His GPS brought him down a cute side neighborhood with tall trees that shaded the street. Each little condo had a tiny front yard.

Johnny saw three young boys on bikes with helmets on swerve to the sidewalk as he cruised down the street in his car and Johnny took a moment to wonder what his life had been like if his dad hadn’t gotten that job offer in America seventeen years ago. He would have learned to ride a bike in this neighborhood, and he would have played with neighborhood kids, and begged them to let him have a dog because the houses looked like they each had a little back fence separating them.

His GPS beeped at him and Johnny pulled over and parked outside of the house that matched the address; he was happy to see that the condo was light blue, and he wondered if it was a different color eighteen years ago. Johnny took out his Nikon camera from its case in the passenger’s seat and got out of the car.

The early autumn air was kind. It wasn’t too hot or cold, and Johnny could just start to see some of the leaves on the trees start to turn gold at the tips. It was about eleven in the morning, and the sun was still high. Johnny leaned against the side of his car and lowered his glasses before he raised the camera up to his face. He took a few good photos, and when he heard the shudders of the camera click, he felt a small smile tug at the corners of his lips.

He looked back up at the house again and felt thankful for his grandmother letting him come and live with her. He felt thankful he didn’t have to live with his mom or dad anymore, and he didn’t want to waste any more time thinking about what his family could have been if his mother hadn’t taken to the drink like she did.

He put his glasses on and got back in the car. He drove around the neighborhood again, looking for that little shopping center he had passed on his way in. He typed in a google search for an electronics store and he found one not too far away.

He felt independent; wearing civilian clothes, taking his grandma’s car out to do errands for himself without any more plans to do for the day except enjoy this time by himself. He parked inside the shopping center and pocketed the keys. He took his camera along, letting the device hang around his neck by the strap.

The electronics store had current and second-hand devices, and Johnny was quite excited when he found a tape-deck for his cassette player. He could play his own music on the ride home now. He purchased it happily, thinking he could go walk around the shopping center more, take a few more pictures, and get himself lunch before heading home.

Johnny walked out onto the sidewalk, his small white shopping bag in his hand, and he walked through the cute, outdoor shopping plaza. He took a picture of a person at a balloon stand, with a huge cloud of multicolored balloons all tied to the cart, out doing his weekend job.

The colors and the scene were very inspiring and Johnny held his camera up to take another picture as he saw the balloon man hand a pink balloon to a little girl and her mom.

He snapped the picture, and looked down at his camera to check it, when a scent wafted past his nose, and Johnny stilled.

His head snapped around, and his eyes instantly zeroed in on the set of shoulders in a simple blue t-shirt, small hips in form-fitted black denim, and his dark brunette hair crisply cut over his ears.

Taeyong.

Johnny couldn’t believe it. Lee Taeyong was _here,_ nearly an hour away from his work.

Johnny couldn’t believe his luck and misfortune, and he didn’t want to feel like a creep, but when he saw Taeyong duck into a jewelry shop, he got quite curious.

Johnny didn’t pick up his pace too much, but he did bee-line it to the jewelry store. His heart thumped in his chest as he stood outside the window of the shop, looking at the displays behind the glass. He took a chance, his heart telling him to, and he reached for the door handle and stepped inside.

There was a bell at the top of the door that tinkled delicately as he stepped inside. Johnny’s eyes found his teacher’s form as he stood at the counter with a salesman. Taeyong seemed to be looking at bracelets.

Johnny immediately turned to look at some earrings on a rack closest to him, keeping his eyes off Taeyong. If he noticed him staring, it could mean trouble, but if Taeyong just noticed him on his own…

Johnny started looking at the earring selection and he spotted a pair he actually liked, a silver dangling wing. An associate, an older woman, came up to Johnny and asked if he wanted to see anything. Johnny answered yes, somehow getting himself wrapped up in shopping, and the lady pulled out the box of displayed earrings and set it on top of the counter. Johnny reached for the one he spotted initially and she held up a mirror for him, and he held the earring up to his ear to admire it.

“It looks nice,” she said, encouraging him to buy, “You have one of those faces that can pull of dangling jewelry.” she said.

“Seo Youngho,” dropped the voice that plagued Johnny’s mind at all odd hours. Johnny turned his head, and his eyes met his teacher’s innocently, like this was a coincidence.

“Oh,” Johnny answered, feigning surprise, and set down the earring, “Hi, Mr. Lee,” he greeted, and bowed just a little bit. Taeyong’s eyes were wide and his mouth was opened just slightly in disbelief. Johnny felt his stomach flip when Taeyong’s eyes fell down his form then back up again to meet his gaze.

Their eyes hadn’t met in a while, not since their conversation a week ago. Johnny knew Taeyong avoided him during school hours, and for good purpose, but here, outside of the danger zone, the rules were different.

“You look…” Taeyong started, “…so much older without your uniform,” he murmured. Johnny didn’t need Taeyong to tell him this, but it still felt validating. He intentionally dressed beyond his age. He was older than most high school students and should have been a college student by now anyways. His black hair was mussed, and flopped to the side, out of his face. He had on his gold wired glasses, with a connecting chain so they could hang on his shirtfront if he wanted. He was wearing a clean white V-neck under a jean jacket. He wore a pair of classic, distressed jeans that fit him well, and a pair of brown leather boots.

“I almost didn’t recognize you with those glasses on,” Taeyong said and Johnny swallowed, “What are you doing out here?” he asked.

“I came out here to take a photograph of my parent’s first house,” Johnny admitted and took hold of the camera hanging across his neck, “It’s just around the corner… I stopped here to do some sightseeing, and get lunch before going back to the city,” there was an awkward lull before Johnny asked, “What are you doing out here?”

“I… I live out here,” Taeyong answered, and Johnny’s brain lit up with this information.

“Here you are,” interrupted the shopkeeper who was helping Taeyong, and his teacher turned to give the man his attention again. Johnny could tell Taeyong was tilted by his presence. Johnny crept a little closer, curious to see what Taeyong had bought, and the shopkeeper showed Taeyong the black gift box. Inside was a simple silver band, a bracelet.

Johnny’s stomach dropped. Was Taeyong buying that for a woman? Johnny had to remind himself that if Taeyong had a lover, that was good. For both of them.

“Pretty,” Johnny noted, and Taeyong thanked the man before he took out his wallet to pay for it, handing the man a debit card.

“Thank you,” Taeyong answered, not looking at Johnny, “It’s for my sister’s birthday,” Johnny’s apprehensive heart leapt into the clouds at that news. Taeyong got his bracelet box put into a cute pink gift bag with white tissue paper. He picked it up, thanking the man and then turning back to Johnny. There was another moment of silence where Taeyong stared at him, before he looked behind Johnny to the earrings, “Are you going to get something?”

“I was thinking about this one,” Johnny said and turned back to the counter to look at the earrings again, “but I’m not really sure.”

Taeyong closed the gap and stepped up next to Johnny. The teenager stiffened when his teacher came into his personal space of his own accord, and Johnny knew what it must have felt like for Taeyong back in the library a couple weeks ago.

“Dangling earrings?”

“Maybe?” Johnny asked with the same inflection. The woman who was helping Johnny smiled again, hoping for the sale.

“It would look nice with your glasses,” Taeyong commented, “Or without them,” he added, then cleared his throat.

“I can get them boxed up for you, if you’d like?” the saleswoman asked.

“Sure,” Johnny decided, throwing caution to the wind. If he didn’t buy something, it may seem suspicious. He took out his own wallet as the woman placed the dangling wings in a small earring box for him, “No gift wrapping, please. It’s fine,” he added when she grabbed a bag, but put it down per Johnny’s request.

As Johnny paid, he was surprised that Taeyong lingered in the shop. Johnny kept looking over his shoulder as the woman ran his card, expecting his teacher to bolt, and leave Johnny where he stood, but he didn’t. When Johnny got his earrings, he immediately turned to the closest mirror and fixed it into his piercing. It felt strange to him, always having to buy a pair of earrings when he only had his left ear pierced, but he figured if he lost one he always had the other.

He turned to Taeyong with a small smile, and Taeyong’s eyes darted from his left to right side.

“You only have one ear pierced,” he stated. Johnny laughed quietly, his gaze dropping and his smile lopsided.

“Yeah, it was a kind of… rebellious moment I had a few years ago. My mom said if I wanted to get my ears pierced, it had to be both of them, but I only got the one pierced kind of to spite her,” he shared, and his teacher wrinkled his nose a little bit.

“Oh, so you were a punk?” he asked, and Johnny laughed a little harder, walking past his teacher and heading for the door. Taeyong followed him and Johnny held the door open for him; Taeyong bowed graciously and brushed passed Johnny, his buttery scent sweeping through Johnny’s senses and making his head feel fuzzy for a moment.

“I wouldn’t say I was a punk,” Johnny said as he stepped out into the late September sunshine, “My mom is the punk. I was just trying to have my own life,” he said, then tipped his head down, “but… I don’t like talking about my family. I don’t really speak to either of my parents. I’m living with my grandmother right now,” he had no idea why he was telling Taeyong about this, but… when was he going to get another chance to talk to him like this? An organic conversation. No school boundaries. No posturing. No reason to avoid the other’s eyes.

Taeyong looked up at him and Johnny caught the look on Taeyong’s face. Pity and curiosity. He could stand the curiousness, but the pitiful look... Johnny wanted Taeyong to care, but not like this. There were some things Johnny wanted to keep to himself. Johnny quickly cleared his throat.

“I was thinking of getting street food,” he changed the subject, “And maybe take some more pictures and window shop a bit more… are you hungry?” Johnny asked. He saw Taeyong’s shoulders tense.

“We shouldn’t even be… talking right now,” Taeyong said, “You’re—”

“Your student. I know,” Johnny interrupted, and looked down for a second, “It’s impossible to forget. But… it’s a Sunday,” that was a lame excuse and Johnny knew it, “And everybody eats.”

“I have errands to finish,” Taeyong said, “I need to go to the farmers market down the way for my fresh produce, and I need to go to the butcher for my dinner,” Johnny blinked at him.

“Butcher?” he asked, “You’re not a grocery store kind of person?”

Taeyong shook his head, a small smile playing on his lips, and he turned and started to walk down the sidewalk, Johnny easily matched his pace, intent on soaking this moment up for as long as he could.

“I like… fresh meat, and homegrown vegetables. One of my favorite dishes is raw beef,” he said and Johnny looked impressed. The student grinned again, his pace easing next to Taeyong, walking the same path.

“Do you cook?” Johnny asked.

“Every meal,” Taeyong answered.

“ _Wow_ ,” he sighed, “You must be good at it if you cook every day. My grandma cooks pretty well. I’d like to say I’m a breakfast man. I can make a mean omelette,” he said and Taeyong smiled up at him.

“Do you really?” Taeyong asked, the little gift bag in his hand swaying as they walked passed the storefronts.

“Yeah, and pancakes, and…” Johnny trailed off as his eyes caught a sign on the sidewalk that said ‘second-hand books’. Johnny stopped and pointed at the sign, his mouth open. “Is that… sorry, does that say ‘discount books’? I don’t know the conversion rate yet, how much would that be in American dollars?” Johnny asked.

“Oh... about two or three, I think,” Taeyong answered and Johnny turned to him fully again, “It’s a second-hand bookstore. It’s been here since before I moved here.”

“Really?” he asked, “That’s… I have to check it out,” Johnny resolved and reached for the door handle.

Johnny had been to dozens of second-hand stores in Chicago, and one of the great things about books, even across countries, is that old books all smell the same. Johnny greeted the older gentleman behind the counter and Taeyong followed Johnny inside.

The omega male watched the student as he ran his fingers along a stack of colorful, dogeared paperbacks, checking the genres.

“Ah, they’re all in Korean,” Johnny mused, his voice was soft, and Taeyong picked up on it, “I love second-hand books. I used to go to stores like this all the time back in America,” he shared.

Taeyong looked around the shop too. He had passed it many times but had never gone inside before today. He walked passed Johnny and up to a full bookshelf of children’s books.

“How about these?” Taeyong asked, “They’re short and simple. Good for practicing,” he said and he picked one from the shelf, then another. Johnny came over and stood a half step behind Taeyong, his eyes skimming the titles.

“Oh, _Winnie the Pooh_ ,” Johnny cooed and he reached for the book.

“That might have too many pictures for a high school student,” Taeyong chuckled.

“Yeah, you’re right, but you know? There’s a bunch of kids in the afternoon class who could benefit from reading these. Like Lucas and Mark,” Johnny mused. Taeyong’s head tilted to the side for a moment as he regarded Johnny’s idea, and his eyes lit up.

“Oh. I never thought of that,” Taeyong said, then looked straight up at Johnny, “That’s a _wonderful_ idea,” he whispered and Johnny looked down into Taeyong’s dark eyes, which was a mistake. His heart swelled as he looked into Taeyong’s beautiful face. He had to remind himself of the danger that would come from getting too lost in those dark eyes. Taeyong turned away first and walked up to the older man running the shop.

“Do you have a box I can use? I want to buy a lot,” he said. Within a few minutes, Johnny was holding a cardboard box in both arms, and Taeyong was filling it up with books from kindergarten to middle school comprehension. The omega’s eyes were still brilliant with excitement.

“This is so great. I can give out extra credit to anyone who wants to read a book to the class,” Taeyong said, “I don’t know why I didn’t think of this. Your idea is _genius_ ,” he gushed and Johnny could only stand there and smile, so willing to help.

“Heh, well, thank you and you’re welcome,” Johnny said sheepishly. Taeyong purchased over thirty books, and once he paid he reached forward to take the box from Johnny’s hands, but the alpha refused and turned his arms away.

“No, I can carry it,” he claimed adamantly, “How are you going to carry your groceries and all these books?” he asked. Taeyong’s eyes dropped back down to the book box, then up to Johnny’s face again.

“Oh, I…” Johnny saw Taeyong’s inner conflict and Johnny jumped on the opportunity.

“If you’re okay with it… we can take this box back to my car, and I can take you and your books home after you’re done shopping?” Johnny offered. Taeyong gave Johnny an eyebrow quirk, and a half smile and Johnny could almost feel like Taeyong was humoring him.

“I drove my _own_ car here,” Taeyong chuckled.

“Then can I help you take this back to your car?” Johnny persuaded, “My grandma gave me a small list of things to get too, so… if it’s not too weird, we can do our errands together?” Johnny tried to sound casual. Taeyong’s hands seemed to falter, but he looked down at the heavy box of books, and then back up at Johnny’s face.

“Okay,” Taeyong conceded, and Johnny couldn’t help the smile that widened on his face, “just for today. And you can’t tell anyone at school that we were together.”

“Together? Who said anything about that?” Johnny joked, “I’m doing some errands. You're doing some errands. It’s not illegal to do some errands with a friend,” he said.

“We’re _not_ friends,” Taeyong reminded him, and Johnny couldn’t help but feel a little shut down, but he wasn’t going to let Taeyong see that his sentence jabbed him though.

“No, I guess we’re not,” he answered, but was still determined to make this day great, “But I’ll still buy you lunch, if you’d like. As your student,” he added. Taeyong made a humming noise but didn’t agree or disagree.

Johnny felt near giddy as his teacher let him accompany him. They walked back to the parking lot, and Taeyong popped the trunk of a silver Honda, and held the door open as Johnny placed the box of used books in the back of the car. Before he closed the trunk, Taeyong placed his sister’s birthday gift down next to the box and picked up a small handful of reusable canvas bags.

As they started walking back to the shopping center, Johnny spotted a stray yellow balloon flying away and he stopped in the parking lot to take a picture of it, pulling his glasses off again and raising the camera to his eyes. He smiled at Taeyong as he jogged to catch up and his teacher’s lips were pulling into a cute smile as well.

“When did you get into photography?” the older man asked curiously.

“Ah, a few years ago,” he said, “I took a photography class at one of my last high schools, and I just kind of loved it. Pictures and memories. Sometimes the mind can get muddled, but photographs can always remind you of a particular point in time. Almost like they’re immortalized…”

“You must have spoken Korean a lot at home, your speech is very… poetic,” Taeyong regarded and Johnny smiled down at him.

“Are you saying you like my voice?” Johnny asked, maybe a little too boldly.

“Watch yourself, Seo Youngho,” Taeyong had to remind him in a teacherly voice and Johnny had to force back his smirk.

Shopping with Taeyong shouldn’t have been as fun as it was for Johnny, and in truth, they didn’t do much. The farmer’s market was amazing though. Colored booths and tarps, freshly baked breads, organic, home-grown vegetables, handcrafted jams, jellies, and even wine. Johnny and Taeyong stopped to smell some homemade soaps, and Johnny marveled when Taeyong approached a man who smiled and gave Taeyong a special, hand-picked bag of cabbage, mentioning how nice it was to see Taeyong again, and Taeyong asked how his wife was doing.

When Taeyong wasn’t looking, Johnny managed to capture a few candid photos of his teacher, smiling brightly, and looking so at ease, his gaze soft. Johnny looked down at his own shopping list and managed to find almost everything on it there at the outdoor market.

They passed a kebab stand, and Johnny insisted on buying some for him and Taeyong. His teacher politely accepted and the two of them stood near the edge of the stall and ate smoked meat and veggies from wooden skewers.

Johnny didn’t say it, but it almost, _almost_ felt like a date. It felt easy, and natural. For a few moments Johnny could forget their age difference, and just enjoy the company. He still wanted to physically touch Taeyong, but he knew he couldn’t.

After they were done at the market, Taeyong said he was going to go to the butcher’s and that Johnny should probably start heading back home. Johnny smiled, but it felt a little bittersweet. He knew that this was a once in a lifetime chance, and that he’d probably never get to be around Taeyong privately again after today.

“This was nice,” Johnny said as they started walking back to Taeyong’s car, “not to be too forward, but maybe in a year, I’d like to go shopping with you again.”

“Let’s not… think about that,” Taeyong said stiffly, “it’s just easier. You really should try and date someone your age.”

“I never thought to ask—” Johnny lied, “—are _you_ dating anyone your age, Mr. Lee?”

“Hmm,” Taeyong nodded, but his smile looked forced. Johnny wondered if he was lying too, to make it easier on him, “Don’t get invested, Youngho, I am seven years older than you.”

“You’re twenty- _six_?” Johnny asked in surprise, and Taeyong’s eyes shone with surprise too, “You look like you could be twenty-one, to be honest,” Johnny commented, “especially in those ripped black pants,” he added.

“I-I’m twenty- _four_ ,” Taeyong clarified, and Johnny cataloged that away in his head as well, “How… how old are you?” his teacher asked tentatively.

“It’s not something I broadcast, but I’m going to be turning twenty this February,” Johnny said. Taeyong’s mouth opened.

“Oh, you’re…” he trailed off.

“...Too old to be in high school?” Johnny finished for him, and he let out a small scoff, and put his free hand in his pocket, “Yeah. My parents suck, as I’ve mentioned. I should be in college right now, but my mother made life pretty difficult for me last year. She made me move a lot, and I missed too much school, so I couldn’t graduate last year,” Johnny said, “So… you’re only four or five years older than me,” the teenager said. ‘ _Which isn’t all that much,_ ’ he added in his own mind.

“I’m sorry,” Taeyong murmured, his eyes shining with a little bit of pity again, “that must be very frustrating.”

Johnny sucked in a deep breath through his nose let out a long sigh.

“It is,” he admitted, “and even though she’s in America, and I’m here, she’s still trying to control my life. I’m…” Johnny took his hand out of his pocket and raked it through his hair in exasperation, “I hate talking about this,” he admitted.

Taeyong reached out with a soft and hand placed it on Johnny’s shoulder comfortingly, the first time they’ve touched since that moment in the library.

“It’s going to be okay,” his teacher said with a smile, “when I’m done with you, you’ll be a high school graduate, on your way to a great college anywhere in the country,” he encouraged, “I can’t see you failing, Youngho. You’re far more mature than some other students, and you seem to know what you need to do in order to get to where you want to be.”

Words like that, coming from Taeyong, made Johnny smile again. He had to remind himself that he had a great support system here, and that he was fully capable of making his own way. Taeyong removed his hand from Johnny’s arm, and Johnny really wished that he could hug the other man in front of him, but he knew that would be crossing too many lines.

“You should start heading back now. You don’t want to get stuck in traffic coming into Seoul,” Taeyong said, and Johnny nodded, taking a step back from Taeyong’s car.

“Have a nice rest of your weekend, Mr. Lee,” Johnny said as he took a step back and Taeyong got in the front seat, placing his groceries on the passenger’s side next to him.

Johnny took another deep, settling breath as he watched Taeyong’s car start, then pull away. Johnny tried not to feel his heart ache as Taeyong’s fresh, calming scent left him, and Johnny made his way back to his own vehicle.

 

~

 

On Monday, Johnny spotted the cardboard box of books behind Taeyong’s desk at the front of the class. He didn’t look at Taeyong as he entered, but he did smile only to himself as he went straight to Jaehyun’s desk where the beta was sitting.

 

~

 

Before afternoon classes started, Johnny met up with Lucas and Sicheng in the cafeteria to get sodas and coffees before heading back to Taeyong’s homeroom for Korean studies.

Johnny pulled his grammar book from his locker on the way back to class, and they met up with Mark and Yuta just outside the classroom. The bell rang and the group walked in and took their seats. Before Taeyong started the lesson, he pulled out the box and set it on the desk.

“Someone gave me a really great idea over the weekend, and right here I have a box of children’s books all published in Hangul. For five points of extra credit, I’m encouraging you all to come up and pick a book. If you’d like to earn _more_ extra credit, you can read the book aloud to the class at the end of the week,” he said.

Taeyong called the class up by rows, so that the whole classroom wasn’t crowding the box of books all at once, and Taeyong handed specific books out to some of the students. When Johnny and his little group in the back row came up, Taeyong handed Mark a book and same with Johnny.

Johnny gave Taeyong a rare smile, and Taeyong returned it, giving the book a single, pointed glance down before looking back up into Johnny’s eyes. Johnny’s heart tempo picked up incrementally and he returned to his seat. When he sat down, he opened the inside cover of the book and found a handwritten scribble.

             _Thank you so much for lunch and your amazing suggestion. This is one of my childhood favorites, and I’d love to share this book with you and to hear your opinion on it in the future._

_-Lee Taeyong_

Johnny shut the book and placed it in his backpack quickly, trying to keep his smile from being obvious.

“What book did you get?” Johnny whispered to Mark, who silently handed over his book. Johnny opened the front page and when saw there was no handwritten note his smile persisted. Johnny pretended to read the summary on the back of the book before he handed it back to his friend.

When he got home that evening. He reread the note, then read the first chapter of the story with a smile on his face.

 

~

 

The last Friday of every month at SIHS was civvies day, or casual-dress day; the one day a month where students were not required to wear their uniforms, and could come to school in their own clothing. Johnny had been waiting for this day since he heard about its existence from Yuta two weeks ago. He loved fashion, and he loved showing his sense of style anyway that he can.

With the uniform, they were allowed to customize it to an extent. Jewelry, hair bows, and shoes were the most common. Sometimes, a student could get away with wearing a different kind of tie or neckerchief if it wasn’t too noticeable. On civvies day, students were allowed to wear anything they wanted, even makeup. There was a list of things that were off limits, of course: strapless shirts, dresses with spaghetti straps, ripped jeans, and obviously anything with profanity.

He had planned his outfit out the night before, and left it out on his dresser. When he got up, he washed his face and put on some BB cream, eyeliner, and filled in his brows. He trussed back his hair with pomade and styled it back and to the side. When he was satisfied, he put on his outfit.

Bold white pants, with a green belt, a light blue and white striped button up, French-tucked into the front of his pants, and the sleeves rolled to the elbow. He had on a pair of new, white street shoes that we so far unmarked and still perfectly clean. He chose to wear his gold glasses and neck chain today, and slipped on a long tan overcoat for the morning and in case it was cold later inside the classroom.

The look wasn’t terribly flashy, save for the almost-subtle eye makeup, and the one dangling earring. He thought he looked sharp, and older. He felt people’s eyes on him on the bus, and he gave an old lady a kind smile as he stood up to offer her his seat. She almost blushed as she took it.

As he walked through the gates of the school, it felt like the first day again. People moved out of his way with just a look, and he felt their eyes follow him as he walked through the halls. Not only did he feel confident, he knew his scent oozed confidence as well, and he didn’t try to hold it back as much as he usually would. Today was the day to feel confident.

Jaehyun and Yuta were outside the classroom. Yuta was in sweats, a tank top, and a bucket hat. Jaehyun was in a cool denim jeans-and-jacket combo, always a classic, and it looked great on him. When Johnny walked up, Jaehyun’s eyes did a very obvious elevator on him, and Yuta turned and startled.

“ _Oh, my god_ ,” Yuta said, “Of _course_ you look like a model, and here I am in sweats,” he mocked and rolled his eyes.

“ _Ha_ , at least you look comfortable,” Johnny mentioned.

“I _am_ comfortable, thank you,” Yuta said. At that moment, Ten walked up to join the group.

“Hey guys, how’s it... oh wow, _Johnny_ ,” Ten gaped as he walked up to them. Johnny smirked, pleased with himself. Ten was in black skinnies and a silver button down shirt.

“He looks like a teacher, doesn’t he?” Yuta said, “Oh professor?” he mocked and put his hand on Johnny’s arm, like he was flirting, “Can I get you anything? A coffee?” he asked, batting his eyes up at Johnny.

“He _does_ look like a teacher!” Ten agreed, “it’s the glasses… and the shirt… and the coat. You did this on purpose didn’t you?” he asked and Johnny laughed again.

“ _Oh, god_ ,” Jaehyun chirped, “You should _do_ that,” he said, his eyes alight with mischief.

“What?” Johnny asked.

“Stand at the front of the class and pretend to teach! As a joke,” Jaehyun urged. Johnny felt his playful side emerge. Taeyong might scold him, might give him a warning look and send him to his seat with his tail between his legs, but Johnny’s smile widened. What’s the worst that could happen?

“Okay,” he agreed.

The group snickered as they stumbled into the classroom. Taeyong wasn’t there yet, and Johnny quickly went to his backrow seat and placed his backpack on his chair and shrugged his coat off and set it on top of the desk.

Johnny walked through the isle, some students trickling in, and the tall student came around and stood behind Taeyong’s teacher’s podium. There was a stack of handouts on the desk and Jonny grabbed them and started to shuffle them, clearing his throat, and adjusting his glasses. A few students giggled and snickered as they caught onto what he was doing.

“Children, please be quick and take your seats,” Johnny called to the class, and some of the students drearily— jokingly —agreed.

Johnny felt his smile split wide open as he smelt Taeyong enter his classroom. Johnny looked over, and felt his stomach lurch.

Taeyong had taken civvies day to heart and he was in faded blue jeans, and a red hoodie. He looked like a student, and Johnny couldn’t fathom how such a simple outfit could look so _damn good_ on anyone. Taeyong stepped into the class, and then blinked rapidly in confusion as he saw who was standing at his podium. Johnny was prepared for the reprimanding comment, but Taeyong’s mouth just dropped open in shock. A group of students trailed in behind him as the bell rang and Johnny spoke over the class again.

“Students, I know it’s a special day but please take your seats, class is about to begin,” he called out commandingly and Taeyong’s expression changed. Johnny was expecting Taeyong to walk up to him and order him back to his seat, but instead, Taeyong looked amused as walked to the back of the class.

Johnny’s gaze followed the teacher as he walked passed the desks, the other students’ eyes following him too, and a slight murmur fell over the class as they watched this unfold. Johnny nearly choked as Taeyong pulled back Johnny’s chair and sat in _his_ seat. Taeyong’s eyes seemed to dance as he sat back, leaning backwards in the chair, and placed his arms behind his neck leisurely, just like Johnny does. Taeyong put a smug expression on his face, his eyes laughing.

The idea that Taeyong noticed Johnny enough to mimic his body language made an unwanted rush of attraction pulse through Johnny’s veins, but right now he was the center of attention at the front of the whole classroom, and he had to keep his composure just as well as he always does. Johnny turned to the whiteboard on the wall and picked up the first marker he found and wrote out his name for the class like Taeyong did. _Seo Youngho_ , in Hangul and _John Suh_ , in English.

“Good morning students!” Johnny called out cheerfully, and the whole class played along and answered ‘Good morning, teacher,’ with some giggles in between. Johnny was beaming.

“My name is Mr. Suh, and I’ll be your teacher for the next, what, let’s say ten minutes?” he adlibbed and picked up the stack of handouts and started passing them out. Johnny kept one for himself and started reading the directions aloud as he wrote them on the board, drawing out his time playing teacher, absolutely winging it. He turned back every few seconds or so to check on the class, and specifically Taeyong in his seat.

He turned around once, and noticed immediately that Taeyong had his hand up.

“Yes, student?” Johnny asked, not feeling brave enough to call Taeyong by his first name in front of everyone.

“ _Mr. Suh_ ,” Taeyong called in a high, borderline bratty voice, “Nakamoto Yuta is still wearing his _hat_ inside,” he ratted, his voice too childlike to be taken seriously and some of the students laughed. Yuta, from his seat, sat up pencil straight.

“ _Mr. Nakamoto_ ,” Johnny said in an admonishing tone, raising his eyebrow, and the Japanese student slowly took off his hat and ran his hand through his blonde hair, drawing his shoulders up and seemingly shrinking in his seat, “Thank you very much.”

Johnny continued his ‘instruction’, the whole class focused on him, and finished writing down the directions on the whiteboard. When he turned around again, he had to keep his face straight as he saw Taeyong pulling his arms through the sleeves of his coat. No one else seemed to notice.

The large tan overcoat looked gigantic on Taeyong, and he looked amused by how far past his hands the sleeves draped. Johnny watched Taeyong raise both his hands to his face, and his teacher’s eyes closed as he took in a swift breath of Johnny’s scent, before he got up out of the seat, and shrugged off the coat.

“Okay, okay, that’s enough. Thank you, Youngho,” Taeyong said, cutting the fun short, and the class seemed to relax and laugh a little bit more, enjoying how long the joke ran. Johnny put the dry-erase marker down and bowed to the class with a smile.

“Thank you, thank you! _Professor Suh, out_!” he cheered before he left the front of the class and made his way back to his seat. Johnny bowed graciously to Taeyong as they passed on the outside isle, and Taeyong patted his shoulder just once.

When Johnny got to his seat, he picked up the coat and pressed it to his face. There was a faint smell of Taeyong there, and it made Johnny’s blood run warm for a moment.

This wasn’t the time or place to be thinking of what his teacher would look like wearing one of Johnny’s large button-down shirts and nothing else… but he was thinking it. He placed the coat behind him on the back of the seat, and tried to concentrate on the handout they were supposed to be completing, but Johnny’s eyes wandered upwards to where Taeyong was erasing Johnny’s handwriting from the board. His hoodie had ridden up a little when Taeyong raised his arm, and Johnny could help but admire his cute little ass in fine denim.

It really wasn’t fair how attractive Mr. Lee was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all, thanks for reading. Please leave a review, I live for them.  
> I updated the tags a little bit too.  
> -Copper


	3. Halloween

September ended, and the first few weeks of October seemed to pass quickly. Johnny had become more accustomed to this dance he and Taeyong shared. If Johnny entered the classroom and there weren’t many people in there, he could spare a glance at his teacher. Usually, Mr. Lee would look back, give him a kind smile in silent greeting, then one of them would break their gazes first, and Johnny would be left with a hollow feeling in his heart that begged for more.

If there were too many people in the classroom, Johnny would force his eyes off Taeyong. Try his hardest not to look, not to smile, not to say ‘good morning.’ He had to leave it alone when there were too many eyes that could see, as if staring at Taeyong for too long would leave him too open, and people would notice him and his internal dilemma.

School and friends were such a great way to block it out. His studies required his attention, and his growing group of friends did too.

There had been a lot of talk about Halloween around school this year; the holiday fell on the last Friday of the month, civvies day, and a lot of students were wondering and asking if they were allowed to wear costumes to class.

Johnny wasn’t excited about Halloween. It used to be one of his favorites as a kid, but when his growth spurt hit him at twelve, trick or treating wasn’t an option anymore. Johnny became too tall, and homeowners started turning him away with disgust when he held out his pillow case for candy, telling him that trick-or-treating was for kids, and teenagers shouldn’t try and take candy that was meant for children.

Johnny was forced to stop trick or treating earlier than others his age, even though his other friends were still getting away with it. Halloween became a night of stress and resentment for Johnny, because it was an excuse for his mom to throw a huge, adults-only party at their house. Because Johnny couldn’t trick or treat, he was left stuck in his room, as dozens of drunk adults trashed his house until four in the morning, and then Johnny was stuck with the clean-up he next day because, more often than not, his mother would still be hungover or still drunk when she woke up the next morning.

Because of the bitterness of rejection, and the recurring themes of Halloween in his young teenage years, Johnny rejected the holiday and stopped dressing up all together.

Hearing Ten, Jaehyun, Yuta, and even Doyoung talk about costumes, and parties… it made Johnny sad. The magic of Halloween had been lost on him years ago. Halloween just smelled like vodka and vomit in his mind.

“If we are allowed to dress up, I might be coming to school in a dress…” Ten mused, “Yuta, would you want to be a Disney princess with me?”

“I’ll go as Prince Charming if you go as Cinderella,” Jaehyun offered.

“You were Prince Charming  _last_ year. Live a little,” Doyoung quipped.

“What are you dressing up as?” Yuta asked Johnny. He knew this question was coming, but he took in a deep breath to prepare himself for the backlash of the answer.

“I’m not dressing up,” he said, “I’ll probably stay home with my grandma, and pass out candy to trick-or-treaters.”

“Uh,  _no_ ,” Ten decided flatly, “Jaehyun is hosting a horror movie night. You’re coming, and you’re coming in  _costume_ ,” Ten proclaimed, and Johnny shook his head.

“Honestly, guys, I’m not a Halloween person,” he said and Jaehyun looked at him with a quirked eyebrow.

“That’s a lie,” he said, “I remember how hyped you were for costumes and candy when we were kids.”

“ _Yeah_ , when I was a  _kid_ ,” he tried not to sound bitter, but he definitely knew he did, “and people didn’t turn me away at their front doors for being ‘too old’ at  _twelve,_ just because I was tall.”

“Well, we may be too old to trick-or-treat now, but we’re never too old to enjoy Halloween,” Jaehyun spoke softly, trying to encourage his friend, “Look… if we’re allowed to wear costumes to school on civvies day, literally everyone is going to do it. You don’t want to be left out. And besides, I’m having a little party at my parent’s place, like Ten said. Movies, popcorn, candy, pizza, sleepover, the whole nine yards,” Jaehyun said, “It would suck if you weren’t there.”

Johnny let out a big sigh.

“The last five years of Halloween memories are just anxiety inducing for me,” Johnny shared.

“Then let’s make new memories!” Jaehyun countered, “If you miss my party, you’re gonna hear about how crazy awesome it was, and how Mark vomited because he ate too much licorice and how Yuta and Lucas made out in a closet, with video evidence.”

“That happened  _two years ago_!” Yuta squawked, “Let it  _die_!” Ten and Doyoung roared with laughter.

Johnny really wasn’t interested. He figured if they all kept pestering him, he’d come to school in an extremely low-budget costume. Like… him wearing his normal clothes, but then drawing two bite marks on his neck with makeup and some fake blood, to be a half-assed vampire.

When he told Ten that idea, the omega glared at him, looking borderline offended.

“No. Absolutely not. You will not jump on the  _Twilight_ train like half of the stupid girls at this school. While you  _are_ hot enough to be a Korean Edward Cullen, I won’t let that happen, because I care about you,” he said, “This weekend, we’ll go to a costume shop, and we’ll find you something suitable. Let Mama Tennie help you.”

“Okay, one: I didn’t say  _anything_ about  _Twilight_. Two: If you  _ever_ call yourself ‘Mama Tennie’ in front of me again, I’ll headlock you. And three: fine, I agree, but  _no_ princess dresses,” Johnny listed off and Ten and Yuta both grinned.

“Okay, we agree,” Ten said and held out his hand for Johnny to shake. Johnny shook Ten’s hand, then Yuta’s, and wondered if he was going to regret this.

“Hey, Jaehyun…” Johnny asked when Ten and Yuta both weren’t listening. Jaehyun turned his attention back to Johnny, “Is there going to be alcohol at this party?”

“Ha,  _no_. My parents are going to be there,” Jaehyun laughed, “Does alcohol make you…  _that_  uncomfortable?” he asked.

“The smell of it does,” Johnny disclosed, “It’s not like I’m straight edge and totally against drinking… it’s just memories of the last five Halloweens, and the smell of  _Bloody Marys_ … I’m not about it. Ten, and Yuta, and you are all so hyped, and I’m just… so not.”

“I’ll tell everyone that this is a candy-and-soda only event,” Jaehyun swore, “I can’t promise that for the graduation party I plan to throw at the end of the year, though.”

“That’s fine, I’ll probably indulge a little at the end of the year when we’ve graduated,” Johnny said, “Oh hey, I’ll be able to  _buy_ the alcohol for that party,” he mused.

“Yeah, but I won’t ask you to,” Jaehyun said and put his hand on Johnny’s shoulder, “I really don’t want to make you uncomfortable, especially around stuff that can trigger you.”

Johnny felt a large tension get released from his heart at that news and he leaned his head down and lightly nuzzled Jaehyun’s hand with his cheek.

“Thanks, Jae. You’re the best.”

~

Every day for nearly two weeks, somebody raised their hand in class and asked Mr. Lee if the school would allow them to dress in costumes for Halloween on civvies day, and every day for two weeks Taeyong would shrug.

“I’ve heard the other teachers talking about it, but no word from the principle yet,” he said, “now, let’s get back to the lesson, please.”

Finally, the week before civvies day, there was an announcement over the school intercom from the vice principal.

_This year, on Friday October 31st, students will be given permission to wear Halloween costumes to school. The following items are forbidden—_

The rest of the announcement got cut off, because the whole class, and both classes on either side of theirs, burst into excited cheers. Taeyong had a smile on his face as he passed out a Halloween guideline sheet that went over everything that was appropriate and inappropriate to bring to school on the holiday:

No weapons of any kind, no outfits that showed the midriff, fake blood was okay as long as it wasn’t too excessive or gory, no skin-tight clothes, no masks... the usual. Johnny shared a look with Jaehyun, Yuta, and Ten, and Ten pointed to Johnny from across the room with a grin.

“We’re going shopping today!” he sang to Johnny over the class and Johnny smiled but sighed.

“Mr. Lee, are  _you_ going to wear a costume to school on Friday?” asked a girl, and Johnny’s eyes shot forward to see and hear Taeyong’s answer. Their teacher nodded with a smile of his own.

“Of course! Halloween is one of my favorite holidays!” Taeyong said, letting a glimmer of excitement show on his face.

~

Johnny was trying not to sigh and huff as he, Ten, and Jaehyun entered a large, pop-up warehouse store called ‘The Costume Emporium’ later that evening. Immediately, there were plastic decorations of skeletons, bats, and witches at the entrance. Some of them had electronic voices and let out silly, spooky cackles. As if that would scare  _anyone_ , even children.

“What do you want to be?” Jaehyun asked, “A king? A mime?”

“I really don’t care,” Johnny said, and Ten looked over his shoulder at Johnny and gave him a little mock glare.

“I’m gonna give you a reason to care. If you don’t find some passion in the next twenty minutes, I’m just going to start handing you outfits to try on. I,  _personally_ , think you would look amazing in that fruit hat as a  _flamingo dancer_ ,” Ten said and pointed to a brightly colored dress and hat ensemble that was clearly for a woman.

“I think it’s  _Flamenco_ , Ten,” Johnny corrected, feeling just a tad snotty. This time Jaehyun gave him a look, and it wasn’t a mocking one. Johnny held his tongue after that as they started to peruse the aisles of male costumes.

Culturally offensive outfits like Indians, Pharaohs, and Mexican bandits Johnny shot down quick, and both Ten and Jaehyun agreed wordlessly. They walked down an aisle devoted only superhero costumes, and Johnny was kind of interested in being Ironman, or Spiderman, because it was easy, but Jaehyun reminded them both that those costumes were going to be skin-tight, and have masks, which was on the school’s no-go list.

“They don’t have any extra-large anyway, I wouldn’t fit into any of these,” Johnny grumbled as he put a Captain America outfit back up on the wall.

Jaehyun pointed out a pretty cool pirate costume, complete with coat, pants, hat, and a clip-on parrot for his shoulder. Johnny grinned and made an annoying parrot squawk, Jaehyun started to combust with laughter, and Ten turned to him.

“I like that you’re getting into this, but please don’t  _ever_ make that sound again, I beg of you,” Ten requested as he pulled the pirate costume off the wall and pushed it into Johnny’s hands, “Let’s look around a little bit more, and we can all try on costumes together. I’m pretty sure I’ll be able to find a Cinderella dress while we’re here.”

“What are you going to be?” Johnny asked, turning to Jaehyun.

“I was going to wear the same outfit I wore last year, but I kinda like that pirate outfit, and I might be able to get Doyoung and Sicheng to be pirates with me, and then we can be a crew...” Jaehyun mused, “But I’m going to try on a couple outfits first, and send them some pictures to get them inspired.”

Ten found Johnny a mafia mobster outfit, and a classic Joker outfit with a purple and gold suit to try on. Jaehyun picked out a different pirate outfit, and Ten practically started dancing when he found a lovely Cinderella dress in his size that was absolutely covered in glitter.

They went to the fitting rooms, which were just small cubicles with curtains for privacy, and Johnny let out a small sigh to himself as he got out of his school uniform and into the pirate outfit. Jaehyun’s pirate costume looked rather nice on him, the puffy white shirt with a plunging neckline, and high waisted brown pantaloons, with a hat and a feather. Johnny’s pirate costume looked ill fitted and rumpled, like it had been sitting in its packaging for too long, and Jaehyun gave him a thumbs down.

“I kinda wanted to match you, but that’s just not a good look,” Jaehyun said, and Johnny nodded before returning to the fitting room. Next was the Joker outfit; the pants were too tight, and he couldn’t even button the coat. He grimaced as he pulled back the curtain. Again, Jaehyun gave him a conflicted look, and Johnny wondered if Jaehyun was seeing the pattern Johnny knew was going to happen the moment they stepped into the costume shop.

Ten glided out of the dressing room in his sparkling light blue gown and Jaehyun and Johnny both oohed for him as he did an elegant spin. His eyes were dancing; the dress fit his tiny waist and showed off his little figure beautifully.

“Okay, I’m done. This is my dress,” he said with a very pleased smile.

“You’re lucky, I’m pretty sure this is how it’s going to be for me with every costume here,” Johnny said as he tried to close the front of the purple suit coat again and Ten frowned, “I’m a big guy, and they just don’t make costumes for people like me,” Johnny said.

“Take it off, try on the mob boss one,” Jaehyun encouraged, and Johnny stepped back into his cubicle and took off the joker outfit. He didn’t think green hair would look any good on him anyway.

The mafia outfit was better, black shirt and white suspenders, fedora, fake cigar, but the pinstripe pants…

“ _Everyone can see my dick_ ,” Johnny stated the second he opened the curtain. Ten wasn’t there to see him in it, but Jaehyun’s eyes zeroed in on his crotch and he swallowed.

“Oh, wow,” he said, “Yeah, that’s… you’re not kidding,” he stumbled over his words and cleared his throat, “I think you’d get  _suspended_ for wearing that to school.”

“ _Aaaand I’m taking it off_ ,” Johnny sighed in exasperation as he turned and ripped the curtain closed again, “Honestly, Jae, none of these are going to fit me,” he said as he unclipped the suspenders and started peeling off the pants.

“This one might,” Ten’s voice said and Johnny turned over his shoulder to see a bright orange thing get slung over the curtain rail, “I found it in the clearance rack. It’s like an extra-extra-large, so if it’s too big I can alter it for you,” the omega suggested.

“What is it?” Johnny asked as he stuffed the mafia outfit back in its plastic packaging.

“It’s a prison jumpsuit. You can be a jailbird,” he said, “it’s easy, it’s cheap, and it’s just the single piece so it’s uncomplicated. We can find you some fake shackles or something to go with it,” he jabbered.

Johnny slipped it on with ease, and his mood lightened as he zipped it up. It was actually  _baggy_ on him, which was a nice change from the last two outfits. He could move and breathe in it, and he looked at himself in the tiny mirror in the fitting room before opening the curtain.

“I’m not mad about this one, it actually fits perfectly,” Johnny said as he showed his friends the costume. Jaehyun’s smile brightened as he gave Johnny a once over.

“ _Heeeey_ ,” Ten sang, “That doesn’t look bad at all. Look in the big mirror,” he said and pointed to the wardrobe mirrors in the hallway of the fitting rooms. Johnny stepped out and took a good look at the orange jumpsuit he was in. As he saw his full image in the mirror, he had an idea.

“ _Oh my god, Holes,_ ” Johnny murmured, “I can cover the numbers right here on the front with a piece of tape and write ‘ _Caveman_ ’,” he turned around, “And I can use spray paint and a stencil to put ‘ _Camp Green Lake_ ’ on the back!” he whispered excitedly, “And I can get a water bottle tied with a little string, and a toy shovel so it makes sense.”

“ _Holes_?” Ten asked, looking at Jaehyun for clues.

“It’s an American movie,” Johnny explained, “I haven’t seen it in years… oh, it has pockets!” he exclaimed, and that was the last thing he needed to make up his mind, “This is the one,” he said and Ten’s smile widened.

“Yes!” he cheered, “Halloween!!” he yelled in excitement.

Johnny was definitely feeling more in the festive spirit as the three of them took their outfits up to the front to pay for them. He may not be going trick or treating, but that was fine. He could still enjoy dressing up and having some fun with his friends this year. Never too late to change an outlook on a once-crappy holiday.

~

Johnny had to buy black spray paint and stencil letters later that weekend, but that was fine by him. He took his project out into the garage to not make a mess everywhere, and he let it dry overnight.

The more days that passed the more excited he, and every other student, became for the end of the month.

Taeyong had said that they were going to end school on Friday with a movie, and he let the class vote on a film. They all decided to watch the first Harry Potter movie, in English with subtitles, and Ten was gushing with Yuta over how pretty they were going to look in their princess dresses.

Jaehyun had gotten Doyoung on board with his pirate crew idea, but Sicheng politely declined, saying he was going to be the Beast to Yuta’s Beauty costume.

“Awww,” Jaehyun teased, “Did Yuta finally wheedle you down?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sicheng played dumb and Yuta grinned from his spot next to him.

“We’re going to get ready early at my place Friday morning,” Yuta explained, we have a lot of makeup to do, do you guys want to join us?”

“I might,” Jaehyun mused, “I think putting on some eyeliner would be fun, and I don’t know how to do that very well.”

“My costume doesn’t require makeup,” Johnny said with a grin.

“What did you decide to go as?” Doyoung asked. Johnny held a finger up to his lips.

“It’s a bit of a surprise,” he answered, and Doyoung rolled his eyes.

~

On Halloween Friday, Johnny got off the bus with a little spring in his step. He had an empty water jug tied with a rope around his shoulder, and a small red beach shovel in his hand just like he envisioned. He had a black tank-top on under his slightly opened jumpsuit and he let his hair do whatever it wanted when he woke up that morning.

The night before, he intentionally took the jumpsuit out and rubbed dirt all over it, to give it that worn look, like he had been out digging holes in it. He was so happy he didn’t get convinced to wear the Joker outfit, because he hadn’t even entered the school campus yet and he already saw three of them in different versions of the character.

He got to his locker and pulled out his texts for homeroom, before he made his way to his class. He saw Jaehyun, Doyoung, Mark, and Lucas standing in the hall by his class, and all of them wearing pirate costumes.

“Wow, you guys look great,” Johnny said as he approached. Lucas was wearing a captain’s hat, and an eyepatch, and Mark had on the same costume Johnny had tried on the other day at the costume shop, but it fit him much better than it did Johnny.

“Johnny!” Lucas yelled in excitement, “Nice inmate costume, man!”

“I’m… I’m not an inmate,” in said blankly and pointed to his ‘caveman’ name tag.

“You’re not?” Doyoung asked. Johnny turned around and showed them the back of the orange suit.

“No, I’m Shia Labeouf…” Johnny said, and got confused looks from everyone but Jaehyun, “From  _Holes…_?” he continued, “C’mon. Mark,  _you_ get it, right?” Johnny asked, knowing,  _hoping_ his Canadian friend would know the reference.

“Uhhhh…” Mark deadpanned, and Johnny’s heart sank.

“ _Really_?” he asked.

“ _I didn’t see it, dude,_ ” Mark murmured. Johnny sighed.

“Oh, wow,” Doyoung said, looking down the hall past Johnny, “His  _majesty_ has arrived.”

Ten had a permanent smile on his face, his eyeliner and shadow done to perfection, and he made the other students in the hall part for him as he passed, his light blue gown drawing everyone’s eye. He was sporting a fresh, silver re-dye of his hair, instead of wearing a blonde wig, and he had a black choker on, and a headband. His gloved hands had the front of the dress held up so he could walk ever so gracefully. He was even wearing silver heels, like glass slippers.

“Oh,  _fuck_ ,” Lucas cursed deeply, and flipped up his eyepatch. Johnny turned his head back to see Lucas cover his mouth with one hand, but his eyes never left Ten as the omega waltzed up to the group, “You look  _stunning_ ,” the younger alpha said and Johnny was rather surprised at such a compliment, then remembered that Lucas and Ten dated briefly last year. Ten beamed at the praise.

“Do you think it suits me? I wish I could wear dresses every day,” he said “Yuta and Sicheng are having an adventure in the bathroom.”

“Wow,  _that_ was quick,” Jaehyun laughed, “Sicheng always seemed like a slow-paced guy to me,” he said and Ten gave him a look and a smirk.

“Haha, we  _wish_. Yuta is trying to  _pee_. You have no idea how hard it is to hold up all this dress while you piss,” he divulged and Doyoung snorted.

“So, he’s making Sicheng help him?  _Classy_ ,” the beta commented with a snicker, and Johnny couldn’t help but laugh too.

“Let me see you,” Ten said to Johnny, “do a twirl,” he ordered, and Johnny did a small spin, holding up his arm with the shovel, “You look great, but no one is going to get the reference. You should have just gotten a pair of handcuffs and made it easier for everyone.”

“No, I like my costume,” Johnny defended, “ _someone_ is going to get it.”

“ _I_ get it,” Jaehyun quipped.

“See,  _Jaehyun_ gets it.”

“Jaehyun was there when you  _bought it,_ dumbass,” Ten snarked, “No one  _else_ is going to get it.”

“You know, Cinderella is supposed to be  _nice_ ,” Johnny commented and Ten looked offended, and stuck his chin in the air. He had no comeback.

The first bell rang, and Mark had to take Lucas’ arm and physically pull him away because the tall underclassmen couldn’t tear his eyes away from Ten. Johnny actually congratulated himself on hanging out outside the classroom until the last possible moment, instead of going inside and scoping out his teacher like he did every day, but when Jaehyun, Doyoung, and Ten started to make their way inside, Johnny did as well.

Taeyong was standing at the front of the classroom as usual, and Johnny’s steps faltered as he saw Taeyong’s costume for the day.

He was suddenly  _very_ happy he didn’t go with prison inmate, because Mr. Lee went as a police officer. Complete with a hat, his navy-blue ensemble had a tucked in shirt and tapered pants that fit him quite well. Johnny pulled a long once over on him and saw the nice leather belt snug on his narrow hips and a plastic baton and handcuffs at his hip. The dark blue color made his skin look great and… did he have  _eyeliner_ on?

Taeyong’s eyes turned to Johnny and his mouth opened slightly, and he pointed at the student. Johnny’s heart jumped into his throat.

“Ah!  _Holes_!” Taeyong chirped, and Johnny’s mouth dropped open in surprise.

“ _Yes_!” Johnny called, feeling utterly validated, “ _Thank you!_ ” he cheered then turned to Ten, “See!  _Somebody_ other than Jaehyun understood my costume!” he said. Ten rolled his eyes and ignored Johnny intentionally.

“Of course, I loved that book,” Taeyong said with a smile, then turned to Ten as well, “Oh, my,  _Chittaphon_ ,” Taeyong said, using Ten’s real name, making the omega look at him, “You make a gorgeous Cinderella, but next time you need full sleeves.”

At that moment, a blur of yellow entered the room and they all turned to Yuta, dressed in an equally sparkling yellow Belle gown, and Sicheng who was almost unrecognizable with the fake fur and beastly makeup.

“Oh,  _boys_ ,” Taeyong said, “I should report these outfits… but I don’t think I’m going to,” he said, and Ten grinned wider than before, “just um… do either of you have jackets for when you’re outside my class? If another teacher sees these, they might report you,” he warned. Yuta’s eyes got wide, and Sicheng ducked down to whisper in his ear, ‘  _You can borrow my coat if you need it._ ’

Ten waved his hand daintily and said something like ‘ _I’ll take my chances_ ,’ as Johnny ducked out of the conversation and made his way to the back of the class to his seat, trying to avoid looking at Taeyong in that slightly suggestive outfit.

It honestly  _wasn’t_ a suggestive outfit. In fact, as an authority figure already, Taeyong wearing a cop’s uniform shouldn’t give Johnny evocative thoughts, but it was way too late. His brain usually went haywire when Taeyong looked particularly nice, but this look was making his brain dip deeper into the gutter than he was typically comfortable with. They still had a few minutes before the bell rang and Jaehyun came over to his seat and sat on Johnny’s desk.

“So, you’re coming to my party tonight, right?” Jaehyun asked.

“Yep,” Johnny said, trying with all his might to keep his focus off Taeyong and onto Jaehyun.

“Are you staying the night?”

“Are there going to be people staying the night?”

“Yeah, I know for sure Yuta, Sicheng, and Mark are. Ten and Lucas are maybes. How about you?”

“I… I think I could probably stay over,” Johnny answered, “I have to see if my grandma needs me for anything tomorrow…” he said. Doyoung wandered up to them with a devious grin on his face.

“Hey, Johnny,” he practically purred, “I have something for your costume.”

“Should I be scared?” Johnny asked, and Doyoung’s grin got wider as he got Johnny’s attention.

“Give me your hands,” the beta ordered. Johnny wordlessly obeyed and snorted when Doyoung produced a pair of shiny metal handcuffs from behind his back and quickly clipped them onto both his wrists, “ _There_ ,” he said, “Now your costume  _actually_ makes sense,” he teased.

Johnny gave them a couple tugs and a humorless smile as Jaehyun laughed.

“ _Haha_ , very funny. It’s not my fault you jerks don’t read good literature,” he played and rested his head in his hands, the handcuff chain short, “Who did you borrow these from?” Johnny asked.

“They’re Mr. Lee’s,” Doyoung said and Johnny’s stomach flipped, “I just asked if I could borrow them for a moment,” Johnny turned his wrists to unlock the cuffs so he could give them back quickly, but as he examined the thick metal cuffs he realized— with curiosity and dread —that there was no trip lever to release the lock.

“Umm,” Johnny said out loud, “how do I get these  _off_?” he asked, and Jaehyun took his hands to inspect the cuffs himself.

“Oh my god, are these  _real_?” Jaehyun asked under his breath. The final bell rang and Johnny felt his embarrassment skyrocket. Now he had to go up to Taeyong… and explain what had just happened.

If his secret attraction to his teacher was inappropriate, this was  _wildly_ out of line. Even though the rest of the students were starting to take their seats, Johnny made Doyoung go with him up the front of the classroom. Johnny hoped to high heaven his cheeks weren’t as pink as he felt, because he was quite embarrassed.

“Mr. Lee?” Doyoung started, his voice soft for the teacher, “Umm, how so we unlock these?” Johnny stayed silent, keeping his chin tucked. Taeyong’s eyes dropped down to Johnny’s wrists, and then Taeyong slapped a hand over his face.

“ _Students…_ ” the teacher almost growled, “You know what? This is my fault for letting you borrow them,” he reprimanded and Taeyong reached into his breast pocket and fished out a set of small keys that jingled as he produced them. Taeyong didn’t look Johnny in the eye once as he shoved the little key into the lock on the side of the handcuffs and unlocked the first wrist. A round of giggles started in the classroom, and someone hooted just once, but Johnny felt his heart speed up and his ears turn bright red.

After he was freed, Taeyong sent them both back to their seats and Johnny kept his eyes glued to the floor as he quickly made his way back to his seat to avoid any more embarrassment.

As class started, Johnny couldn’t get the very real fact out of his head that Taeyong owned actual, functional, steel handcuffs. For what  _possible_ reason did his teacher have to own a pair of real, police-grade, metal cuffs?

He may never know the answer, but he for sure was never going to forget that piece of exciting information. To make matters worse, Taeyong had them clipped to his belt loop all day, so there they were, at his hip, resting not-so-innocently as a constant reminder to Johnny.

He was able to forget about it for a while as they watched Harry Potter, but anytime Taeyong got up and moved, there they were, taunting and teasing Johnny.

He knew he was going to have to go home and compose himself after school to make it through the Halloween party tonight, and he avoided Taeyong’s eyes more avidly than he usually did for the rest of the day.

The school day was cut early, and afternoon classes were dropped because of the holiday. After basketball, math, and science, Johnny was incredibly grateful not to have to go back to Taeyong’s class and sit through another three hours of watching him lecture in his cop uniform.

Jaehyun and the rest of the group were leaving together to walk back to Jaehyun’s house, but Johnny made an excuse to go home for a bit, check on his grandmother, ask permission to stay over that night. He didn’t think any of them noticed how off he was for the day, and Johnny was relieved when he got on the bus alone and headed back to his grandma’s house.

When he got home, she was in her chair, a knitting project in her lap and the television on. Johnny gave her a kiss on the cheek and she asked him how his Halloween day went.

“It was good. Nobody got my costume, but that was okay,” he shrugged, “Jaehyun’s party tonight is a sleep over, and I wanted to check in with you before I headed over for the night,” he said. She smiled up at him, her wrinkled face delighted and she reached up and pinched his cheek fondly.

“ _Ohh_ , my grandson, you’re such a good boy,” she cooed and Johnny felt his conflicted heart melt for a moment, “Of course. I’m going to be just fine, you go and have a good time with your friends. It’s important to enjoy these memories before you become an adult.”

Johnny knelt to the floor and leaned over to give her a hug.

“Thank you, grandma,” he murmured into her sleeve, before pulling away, “I’m going to go upstairs and get my stuff together and take a shower before going out.”

Once he left the living room and began his walk up the stairs, Johnny felt his smile fade from his face. He made it up to his room, and Johnny dropped his backpack on his bed and unloaded his school stuff, preparing to fill it with his overnight clothes.

He turned on his computer and plugged his camera into the USB cord to clear its memory so he could bring it to the party and take more pictures tonight. When he plugged it in, he scrolled through the roll and stopped when he caught sight of the few pictures he had taken of Taeyong a month ago at the farmer’s market.

Johnny enlarged them and took a deep breath through his nose. No one knew he had these pictures, Johnny himself even forgot he had taken them.

He remembered the feeling of the handcuffs on his wrists and he swallowed. He saved all the pictures to a folder on his desktop and made sure to remove the photos from that day from his camera in case anyone wanted to look through them later that night.

As soon as he was done, he pushed his chair back from the computer and went to the tiny bathroom that was at the top of the stairs next to his room. It had a small, single-man shower with a glass door. The shower head wasn’t tall enough for Johnny, and he had to bend to wash his hair, but that wasn’t his priority right now.

He turned on the water, and while he waited for it to heat up, he took off his costume and set it on the counter to put back on when he was done.

He stared at himself in the mirror. He felt agitated, he wondered if his eye bags were darker than before, he agonized over what he was about to do and what he would do if anyone found out about it. He tore his eyes away from his reflection, his stomach twisting as he resigned himself. He stepped into the shower, and when he closed the door, he shut his eyes and let his mind be selfish.

He leaned his shoulder blades against the cold shower tiles, the water raining down on his front and let his hands quickly get to work. He had been fighting the urge to get an erection all day, and when it finally became the appropriate time, it only took a minute for his cock to agree.

Johnny gripped his swelling length, the water adding a rough friction to the motion and he bit his bottom lip as he began to imagine his teacher again.

He had been avoiding acts like this. They felt too secretive, too wrong, and too desperate, but he had come to a point where he could no longer avoid his surmounting desires.

He imagined Taeyong; his petal pink lips, his round, soft eyes, his rigid jaw and chin. He dug into his memories to recall his warm, buttery scent. It was easy when he smelled it so clearly every day, for hours on end. He wondered what Taeyong would sound like when he gasped for breath, and how his moans would echo off the bathroom walls. His dark hair would be wet, and stick to his forehead and neck from the shower they were in together. Right now, in Johnny’s mind, his hands were cuffed to the shower head.

Johnny could almost see him, chest pressed to the tile, his head turned over his shoulder, the muscles of his back and legs quivering, his hands gripping the pipe above him.

‘ _Youngho…_ ’

He could almost hear those whispers from that perfect mouth, and Johnny’s pace quickened, his other hand going from his neck to his sensitive sack, to fondle and squeeze them, driving him forward, urging his knot to form. Taeyong would be tight and hot, a perfect fit for his size. He wondered if he could get his teacher wetter than he had ever been before. Imagining what Taeyong would feel like from the inside made Johnny choke back a throaty moan, and he clenched his teeth.

‘ _...Youngho!_ ’ he imagined his name on Taeyong’s lips again, and Johnny felt his knot start to form as his right hand fisted up and down his length quickly.

He let his mind drift. He’d throw Taeyong’s dripping wet body onto his bed on his back, and slip back into him with ease. He visualized his teacher’s eyebrows pinched up as Johnny stood over him and stared down at him, a mess on top of his bed.

Taeyong’s hands would still be shackled and his fingers would claw at the sheets above his head. Johnny pictured Taeyong’s legs wrapping up around his middle, pulling Johnny down over him before he pushed his hands to the wall to brace himself as Johnny’s pace picked up, slamming into his lithe body as Taeyong’s cries got louder.

His left hand slid up to squeeze his knot, and his right hand focused on the leaking, mushroom head of his cock. When his precum dripped out, the slide of his hand became easier and Johnny knew he was going to finish soon. He pictured Taeyong's face flushed and contorted in pure pleasure, imagined what Taeyong would look like as his orgasm breaks, his spine bowing, Johnny’s name on his lips again…

‘ _Youngho!_ ’

Johnny came  _hard_ , and managed to keep himself quiet as he gasped for breath and stroked himself through it. His cum shot against his palm and the warm water washed it all away. His calves and knees shook and Johnny let his head knock back against the wall, his mouth falling open and his breath ragged as he rode out the long orgasm.

~

Johnny was ready with his camera as Jaehyun answered the door, and Johnny snapped a picture of his friend’s surprised face.

“Hey!” Jaehyun grinned, and went in for a hug “I almost thought you were gonna bail…”

“What? No,” Johnny assured, “I just needed to check in with my grandma, and take a shower,” he said as Jaehyun stepped aside and let Johnny in. Johnny greeted Jaehyun’s mother in the kitchen and she cooed with joy at seeing Johnny again for the first time in years.

His mother was preparing snacks, and Johnny and Jaehyun offered to take the bowls of chips and mini sandwiches with them upstairs so she didn’t have to.

There were more people there than Johnny expected, and he was happy to greet the younger members of their basketball team; Jisung, Jaemin, and even Haechan who was hanging on Mark’s shoulder. A few other students were there that Johnny had seen around but didn’t fully recognize because they weren’t in basketball with them.

Johnny took lots of pictures, and even let Yuta and Jaehyun take the camera from him to take some of their own. They had a movie playing, but were only half watching them as they sat around, chatted, made fun of each other, and talked about classes and basketball. After one film, Jaehyun busted out Mario Kart and Lucas and Mark’s competitive sides came out.

Jaehyun growled at Ten and Yuta for getting glitter all over his house, and the two omegas went to change into their pajamas after the sun went down. Johnny ate too much dark chocolate, and was thankful when the pizzas arrived so he could have something else in his stomach. The sandwiches Jaehyun mother had graciously made had been devoured hours ago.

He felt better now that he released his tension and was at the party with his friends, nowhere near the object of his secret affection.

Some of the younger kids knocked out before midnight, during the second film, and Johnny was sitting up on Jaehyun’s bed, his back against the wall, and Jaehyun’s head on his shoulder.

Johnny saw Ten and Lucas in a similar situation, but Lucas had his arm around the omega, and Ten was leaning into Lucas’ chest. When the movie ended, Johnny shifted, and Jaehyun fell into his lap, completely asleep. Johnny snickered quietly to himself as he slipped out from under his friend, and laid out on the bed next to him, letting the others deal with sleeping on the floor.

Yuta popped in a third film, but no one was awake by the end of it, and the television was still on when they woke up the next morning.

~

Johnny woke up on Monday to the sound of his phone vibrating loudly on the bedside table beside him. He had been up late with Jaehyun catching up on homework, and he had gone to bed later than he had planned, so being woken up before his alarm was obnoxious to him today.

He reached for the offending object and grabbed it. He felt mildly annoyed that someone dared to call him so early, and he groaned as he opened one eye just enough to read the caller ID.

The number wasn’t saved to his phone but the area code was from Chicago.

Johnny felt something foreboding in his stomach as he stared at the unknown number. The call went to voicemail after a few seconds and he saw in his notifications that he had four missed calls from this number. He groaned warily to himself.

He also had a few texts and when Johnny opened them, he saw he had three from the unknown number and one from his father. As he read his dad’s text, his stomach turned.

‘ _Your mother kept bothering me for your number, so I gave it to her. Hope that’s OK_ ,’ it said and Johnny’s jaw clenched.

“ _No_ ,” Johnny muttered to himself, “ _No_ , that is not  _‘OK’, Dad._ What the  _fuck_ have you  _done?_ ”

He read the texts from his mother and sighed, but by the end of it, it turned into a growl of frustration and annoyance.

‘ _John, it’s your mother call me_.’  ‘ _Why won’t you answer your mom?_ ’  ‘ _Do you hate me still?_ ’

“ _Oh my god_ ,” Johnny rolled onto his back and held the phone over his head to stare at the texts. If it was five in the morning for him… it was one in the afternoon for her. As Johnny stared at the phone in disbelief, it started to vibrate again as he got another call from her.

He didn’t want to answer it. It was too early in the morning for him to have to deal with this. He wanted to call his dad and curse him out for giving his mother his phone number, when his dad should have known that Johnny was still avoiding her and her bullshit.

Johnny knew if he picked up the phone, she would rope him into a long conversation that would just be too emotionally charged and he wasn’t ready for it. He had other things on his plate to deal with and his mother couldn’t be one of them right now.

He ignored the call and sent her a text.

‘ _It’s five in the morning for me and I have school in two hours. Please leave me alone and let me sleep_.’ he sent. He knew it was a fruitless attempt, and within a few moments he got another text.

‘ _When are you going to call me?_ ’ she asked.

He didn’t respond.

 


	4. Hardcore Studying and Ten’s Proposition

Taeyong was passing back quizzes at the end of afternoon classes. He deliberately placed them face down on each student’s desk, so they could turn them over and see their grades at their own discretion. Johnny heard a few students let out sighs of relief, Lucas being one of them. When Taeyong came up to Johnny to hand him his quiz, his teacher gave Johnny a frown as he handed the student his paper. Johnny felt his stomach fall and he let out a resigned breath as he turned over the paper and saw the low percentage.

‘ _What is happening here? Do I need to keep you in at lunch to study more?_ ’ Taeyong wrote in red pen under his grade and Johnny felt a dejected breath leave his body. His last two test scores had been everything less than average. At the beginning of the year, he had been doing well, but as the weeks went by and the lessons got more complex, he had been slipping.

The worst part is Johnny knew why too.

After finally breaking the seal and touching himself to the thought of his teacher, it became harder for him to put aside his guttural thoughts. He found himself daydreaming in class more than before, and daydreaming at night too. The itch to put his hands on his teacher was near overwhelming for him these days. He had been waking up hard most mornings from very vivid dreams he couldn’t control; pushing Taeyong up against his desk, or his locker, more shower dreams, and even one where Taeyong was the student and Johnny was the teacher. A ruler and spanking was involved, as well as echoed moans his brain conjured up that haunted him in the back of his ears in waking hours.

As a result, his twitchy hands had him masturbating more often. He found himself being ruled by his sex-monkey brain more than before, and he had to force himself to remain straight faced and controlled over it. His need for an outlet was growing, and Johnny didn’t know how long he could keep it together.

It didn’t help that his mom had been calling him, his grandmother, and his aunt over and over requesting multiple times a week to speak to her son. Johnny had been making every excuse to avoid her calls. He just wasn’t ready to deal with that basketcase yet.

Basketball became his focus and his meditation.

Johnny felt clean and well-polished when he played. He could put it all aside; school, grades, parents, Taeyong… he could leave it behind in the locker room when he was wearing his jersey and sneakers and working with the others on his team.

The sound of fresh shoes squealing on hardwood, the smell of the rubber basketball under his nose, and the scent of the other boys’ sweat mingling together allowed him the escape he craved. The feeling of leaping into the air, higher than the others, to toss the ball into the hoop with ease… it made him feel normal for the two hours a day they had practice. The physical activity was his only true distraction.

The drills they had been doing these last two months were paying off. The coach had them practicing footwork, jumping, and dodging. Using water jugs placed strategically on the ground to act as opposing players so they could learn how to properly spin, evade, and travel across the court to make their shots. Practicing chest throws back and forth for minutes on end, getting quicker and quicker every time. Then moving on to skirmishes, three-on-three and five-on-five. Even the shorter members were excelling, and they were rounding out to be a pretty formidable team.

In the locker room the following afternoon, Johnny had finished a quick shower with the others and was sitting in a towel at his locker, getting ready to put back on his uniform and grab a drink from the cafeteria before he had to return to the emotional prison that was Taeyong’s classroom for his extended Korean lessons.

He felt someone sit down next to him and shoulder him softly. Johnny grinned to himself, because he didn’t have to look at the person to know it was Jaehyun, his fresh scent after his shower gave him away.

“Hey, I’ve got something to tell you,” Jaehyun started, and Johnny side eyed him.

“Oh, yeah?” he asked.

“Yeah. Yuta told me that Ten is going to ask you to sleep over at his place when he has his heat this weekend,” Jaehyun dropped candidly and Johnny faltered and turned to look at Jaehyun with wide eyes.

“ _What_?” he asked, disbelieving, “ _What about Lucas_?” he asked, and Jaehyun shushed him and looked around to see if Lucas was near, before he leaned in closer to whisper.

“Ten isn’t dating Lucas. He’s going to ask you,” his friend warned, “Are you gonna accept?”

“I— I don’t know,” Johnny answered honestly, “Ten’s not really… my type?” he offered weakly. From what he’s seen of Ten though, the Thai boy gets what he wants when he sets his eyes on in. Johnny never thought he’d have to worry about that with the way Lucas practically drools when he walks near.

“So, you’re gonna say ‘no’?” Jaehyun asked curiously.

“I don’t know!” Johnny repeated and stood up, dropping his towel and reaching into his open locker for his underwear, “Is that really an option? Saying ‘no’? He’s kinda persistent.”

“I mean… you’re the alpha. You have the control in that aspect,” Jaehyun reminded him and Johnny laughed dryly at the notion.

“ _God_ , I wish that were true,” he muttered, “Right now, I feel like I have _no_ control. Did you know I’m about to start failing Korean?” Johnny huffed as he yanked on his slacks, “ _Failing._ At my first language,” he mocked himself, “And my mom? She won’t stop calling me. If I talk to her it’s going to end in a screaming match, and... _I dunno man, I really don’t need this right now,_ ” Johnny sighed. As much as he would love to tell his friend about his daily struggle with his not-relationship with his teacher and his growing feelings, he _can’t_. The more people that knew, the more dangerous it would be for Taeyong, and Johnny didn’t know what he would do if his actions caused Taeyong to have to leave the school. Johnny slipped on his white collared shirt and sighed, “ _I’ve been sleeping bad lately, I guess. It’s becoming harder to concentrate and stay awake in class_ ,” and that wasn’t a total lie, Johnny reconciled with himself.

“Okay, so don’t think about Ten. I’m sorry I told you, I just thought maybe you’d want a bit of a warning before he springs it on you himself,” Jaehyun murmured.

“No, no, it’s… it’s fine. I understand why you told me, and honestly, I’ll make less of a fool of myself now that I know it’s coming. So, thank you.”

“Do you… want help with Korean? We can study together,” Jaehyun offered. Johnny let out another big sigh as he buttoned up his shirt and pulled out his blazer.

“Yeah, I guess,” he said, “It just makes me feel like such an idiot, I’ve been speaking this language for longer than I can remember. I’ve been completely fluent in English and Korean my whole damn life, but I can barely read a kid’s book in Hangul. And I got a 20% on my last quiz.”

“It’s gonna be okay,” Jaehyun said and curled his arm around Johnny’s, pushing his weight into his friend’s side comfortingly, “We all have to start somewhere. Gotta learn to crawl before you can walk or run, right?” he encouraged, “Let’s just forget about your family and Ten. After school we can go grab coffees and go back to your place to do our homework, and then you can kick my ass at a video game. Whatever you need.”

~

“Mr. Lee?” Johnny asked quietly after classes ended that day. The bell had just rung and the other students were hurrying out the door to go home for the day. Johnny approached his teacher with caution and stopped before the student’s desks ended, Taeyong’s desk was like a barrier between the two of them.

Taeyong looked from Johnny’s face, to the paper quizzes he held in his hands, and then to the last few students who were leaving the class. The omega cleared his throat.

“Yes?” Taeyong answered tentatively.

“Can… can I retake these quizzes at the end of the week for a better grade?” he asked, feeling so vulnerable that he couldn’t even look Taeyong in the face. His teacher’s scent still put a film of unrest over Johnny’s mind, his need for reassurance and any sort of a break was making him emotional, and it wasn’t how Johnny liked to hold himself. He felt like, if he had a tail, it’d be tucked between his legs in shame and submission, “I’m sorry I’ve been distracted and flunking recently. I’ve been very stressed at home and with basketball. I’m going to study hard this week with Jaehyun after school… but is there any chance I can retake these two quizzes for a better grade, please?” he asked, his voice sounded so weak and it made Johnny cringe at himself.

“...No,” Taeyong answered flatly after a moment and Johnny’s heart dropped like a stone, his breath left him, and his hands went cold, “Actually, I was going to bring this up to you at the end of the week... if you fail the next quiz, I have to have you pulled from the basketball team.”

Johnny’s eyes snapped up quickly, and he looked into Taeyong’s face for the first time that day. His teacher looked tired, but even though he had soft shadows under his eyes, he still looked beautiful to Johnny.

“ _No, no, no_ , please, basketball is the only good thing I have going for me right now. Our first game is in two weeks, and the team _needs_ me!” Johnny pleaded, shaking his head slowly.

“I’m sure they can manage without you. I’m sorry,” he said, although it was unapologetic, “If your grades slip too much, you can’t take part in club activities and you’ll have to stay in extended study until they are brought back up. To be in a sport, you can’t be below 50% in any class. It’s not my rule, it’s the school’s rule,” Taeyong explained and Johnny felt his throat close up, “Now, you’re just scraping above the 50% mark right now in literature and Korean. According to your math and science teachers, you’re doing alright… it’s just here where things are kind of… lacking. Remember, there’s always lunchtime tutoring as well.”

This news was a bit too much for him right now, and he tried to collect himself, telling his rational self that he absolutely could _not_ cry in front of Taeyong. His frustration with his life was becoming too much: his mother, his unrequited crush, the anxiety of having to have a very uncomfortable talk with Ten, and the new news that he could be kicked off the team because of his grades was all too compiling for him in this moment. He tried taking a deep breath, but as it left his body he felt his lungs quiver, and it was too noticeable. His breath was shaky and he felt his hands start to sweat.

“Is something the matter, Youngho?” Taeyong’s voice dropped quietly, and Johnny could hear his concern flooded through. Johnny’s eyes met Taeyong’s again and he could feel himself losing his control as he saw the look on Taeyong’s kind and worried face. For a moment, Johnny wanted to scream ‘ _Everything!_ ’ and unload his feelings and fears unto his teacher.

But he didn’t. He _couldn’t_. He had to keep it together. He couldn’t let his emotions get the better of him, not here and not now, not in front of his teacher who he wanted so badly to please and to shine for. He swallowed thickly, to gather himself and reply as steadily as he could.

“No,” he answered stubbornly, “I’m going to try harder for the next test,” he swore and he looked down to shove his quizzes back into his backpack haphazardly, not caring if they creased or wrinkled. He didn’t notice Taeyong come around the side of his desk until his teacher put a hand on his shoulder blade, and Johnny flinched at the contact of the warm hand over his uniform.

“Hey,” he murmured, his voice so soft it made Johnny’s heart wretch, “If you need to talk, I’m—”

“I’m _fine_ ,” Johnny hissed, balling away his heart, and he jerked himself away from his teacher. He saw Taeyong recoil quickly from his bitter response and Johnny immediately felt guilty for snapping. He pulled his bag over his shoulder, his stomach twisting in regret. He couldn’t look at Taeyong when he said his last words, “Have a good night. Drive home safe,” he muttered quickly, and he stalked out of the classroom.

He had to shake this upset off him quickly, because he was about to see Jaehyun, and work on his godforsaken Korean homework in his grandma’s kitchen, and he didn’t want to have to explain the conversation he just had to either of them.

He looked down at his phone and saw he had thirteen missed calls from his mom from just today and his upper lip curled in disgust. He had to refrain from slamming his fist into the nearest locker.

_“Unbelievable_ ,” he growled, and stalked out of the school. He hardly noticed the other students stepping out of his way as he went.

~

That night, after Jaehyun went home, Johnny dragged his tired feet up to his room and opened his laptop. His brain felt overworked from their cram session, and his heart felt like there was a big scoop taken out of it, and he felt so terribly guilty for how he acted in front of Taeyong that day.

He took out his school binder and flipped through the pages of printed handouts to find the syllabus they had all been given on the first day of class. Johnny’s eyes fixed themselves on Taeyong’s work email. He let the letters seep into his brain. He read it so many times he memorized it.

After a long few minutes of agonizing and lamenting, Johnny pulled up his own email and typed Taeyong out a short letter.

_John Seo:_

_Dear Mr. Lee,_

_I’d like to apologize for my behavior this afternoon after school. It was rude of me to snap at you, and I shouldn’t have taken out my frustration with outside things on you, when you were just trying to follow school protocol._

_You mentioned lunchtime tutoring earlier today, and I’d like to know if I can come in tomorrow and take you up on the offer, to try and raise my grade._

_Thank you for your time and I hope you have a pleasant evening._

_-Johnny_

He sent the email after rereading it twice, and then went to his bed with another big sigh, his eyebrows drawn up.

~

“ _Johnny_ ,” Ten propositioned the very next day as he slid into the seat in front of Johnny’s when it was vacated. The bell had just rung for break time. Some kids walk to the cafeteria for snacks at this time, or they go to the bathroom, or find a semi-secluded spot to rendezvous with their partner for a kiss and a conversation before they have to return to their classes. The girl who sat in front of Johnny left for whatever reason, and Ten had swooped in almost immediately.

“ _Chittaphon_ ,” Johnny greeted him in the same fashion, knowing already what Ten was going to ask. Johnny only noticed it because Jaehyun had told him, but Ten smelled just a little sweeter than normal. The omega grinned a fox-like smile, his eyes dancing with intention. He sat backwards in the school chair and leaned forward to rest one arm on Johnny’s desk, the other reaching back to clasp his neck.

“This weekend, my international family is going on a little vacation for their anniversary and it just so _happens_ to be at the same time as my heat,” he said. Johnny shot a look over to Yuta, Doyoung, Sicheng, and Jaehyun who were all gathered at Jaehyun’s desk at the front of the class, watching them from afar. Ten continued, “I’m expecting it Friday night, or _maaaaybe_ Saturday morning. Anyway, I’d like to know if you’d be down to help me out,” he asked, and quirked his eyebrows, his tongue making a little appearance too. Johnny cleared his throat and looked down at his hands, then up at Ten’s face again.

“What happened to Lucas?” he asked, “The two of you seemed pretty cozy at Halloween. I’m sure he’d come crawling on his knees if you asked him to.”

“ _Oh,_ he would. I intend on asking Lucas if you say _‘no’_ , but I came to you because you’re my first choice.”

“Um. Well, first of all, thank you, I’m honored,” Johnny started, picking his words carefully, “but, uh… now don’t take this the wrong way, but wouldn’t you rather have sex with someone who… likes you that way?” he asked, feeling like he might be stepping on eggshells with questions like this.

Ten just shrugged.

“I’m not asking you to date me, I’m asking you to do me a favor. I don’t want to date anyone right now. _I don’t want that drama_ ,” he explained, spattering English in with his Korean, “If I wanted to date an alpha, I’d be dating them. And if I liked you that way, _trust me_ , _you’d know_. The reason why I’m asking you first is because Lucas is young and comes with _baggage_. _I like to keep my options open_ ,” he said with a flourish of his hand and another dazzling grin, “ _Honestly_ , I would just rather roll around with you in my sweat for a day, instead of rolling around in my sweat alone for three. _So how about it, do me a solid_?” he asked, and Johnny couldn’t help but snort.

“ _A solid, huh_?” he asked with an amused smirk.

“I’ve been waiting to use that one all day, _lemme tell you_ ,” the pixie of a boy laughed.

Johnny’s stomach fluttered a little. This wasn’t how he expected this conversation to go, but the idea of no-strings-attached sex might be just the thing he needs to… maybe not _get over_ Taeyong, but allow him to put his teacher in the back of his mind easier. It might help him concentrate on his schooling… it might be good for him. A release. An outlet. He still hadn’t shaken that feeling of… needing to be an alpha over someone, and this was the best kind of opportunity an alpha could ask for.

“Can I let you know?” he asked, Ten’s smile faltered a little.

“I kinda gotta know by Thursday night…”

“I can let you know by then,” Johnny said, “and like, I’m sure you could text Lucas at like midnight on Friday and he’d run to your aid at the drop of a hat.”

“ _Ah, this is true_ ,” Ten said wistfully, his smile returning, “ _He’s such a good boy_.”

“ _See? I’m not such a good boy_ ,” Johnny said and Ten smirked.

“I kinda get that vibe. I wanna see what you’re all about, _John_ ,” Ten said and then slapped his hand on Johnny’s desk as he dismounted the chair, “You have until Thursday night, then I’m asking Lucas and you can cry because you missed your chance.”

“ _Oh, boo._ _I got it_ ,” Johnny said with a laugh as Ten left and returned to Yuta and Doyoung. Almost immediately, Sicheng and Jaehyun bee-lined to him from across the room.

“What did you say?” Jaehyun asked.

“I told him I’d think about it,” Johnny answered truthfully, “I mean, I haven’t gotten laid since coming to Korea… and if he’s serious about a no-commitment kind of thing, what do I have to lose?”

“Umm…” Sicheng answered slowly, “ _Lucas_?” he asked, his tone stating the obvious.

“ _Oh_ ,” Johnny said and looked up at the front of the class. He saw Taeyong staring at him and Johnny looked away, “ _Shit_ , I didn’t think about that. I should ask him if it’s going to be okay if I help out Ten.”

“ _Yeah_ ,” Jaehyun murmured, “Ten and Yuta can’t keep secrets, so if you think this will stay between you and Ten, you’re wrong,” he added.

“Well, _obviously_. You two all already know, and probably so does Doyoung. _Why didn’t I think about that?_ ” Johnny asked himself and looked back up at their other friends, and Johnny noticed Taeyong’s gaze trained on the group of them at the front of the class too. He let out a big sigh, “I mean… I’d like to help Ten out. It’s been a while since I’ve gotten some, but if it’s not okay with Lucas I’ll have to decline. I really don’t need more drama on my plate right now,” he said, thinking of his cell phone in his pocket, which had been going off quietly for the last two days because his mom couldn’t stop calling him.

“Good luck with _that_ conversation,” Jaehyun said quietly.

“Yeah, I’ll totally need it, won’t I?” Johnny asked sardonically and sighed, ready to change the conversation, “I’m going to stay in at lunch and get extra tutoring. If I don’t get a good mark on my next Hangul test, I’m going to be kicked off the basketball team.”

“ _What_?” Jaehyun sputtered in disbelief, “But… we actually need you! You’re our best player!” he exclaimed and Johnny nodded, hearing the praise but not accepting it as well as he could have in a situation like this.

“ _Yeah, I know_ ,” Johnny sighed, “Besides my grades, I’m kind of dealing with a lot right now,” he said and took out his phone to check his notifications, “Nine missed calls and seven unread texts all from my mom.”

“ _Whoa_ ,” Jaehyun breathed, “How did she get your number?”

“ _My dad fucked up_ ,” Johnny added, “but I haven’t told him I’m pissed about it yet,” he growled.

“So, like…” Sicheng asked, “Did someone die? That’s a lot of calls.”

“No, she’s just needy, and dramatic, and stubborn like the female alpha she is,” Johnny listed, “I moved to Korea to get space from her, and this is _not_ what space looks like.”

~

Johnny had to force his feet to keep pace as he rounded the hall and walked to the door of his homeroom class later that day. It was lunchtime, and most students were in the cafeteria, or out on the school grounds getting some fresh November air before it became too cold to be outside at all. He grabbed a quick lunch and a bottle of juice from the cafeteria before he begrudgingly made his way back to his classroom to face Taeyong for the first time since his outburst.

His stomach was knotted in anxiety as he poked his head through the open door. His stomach flipped again when he saw that Taeyong was alone in the classroom, reading something on his work tablet, in front of him was a boxed lunch and he had a pair of chopsticks in one hand.

Johnny walked through the door and Taeyong’s scent billowed over him. His toes curled inside his shoes and he swallowed before speaking.

“Hey, Mr. Lee,” Johnny greeted in a low, sorry voice and Taeyong looked up at him. He had a pair of reading glasses on the bridge of his nose and he set down his chopsticks and pulled them off his face, before sitting up straight, his face splitting into a smile.

“Hello, Youngho,” Taeyong greeted, “I got your email last night. Come, sit down,” Taeyong’s gentle voice beckoned. Johnny remained where he was for a moment, “It’s okay. Shut the door, and pull up a seat,” his teacher coaxed. Johnny stepped inside and turned to shut the door. Just before it clicked shut, he realized that this would isolate the two of them inside, together. His stomach twisted again and even though Johnny had his food in one hand, he didn’t know how much of it he actually wanted to eat in that moment.

Johnny swallowed nervously as he pulled a seat out from the closest desk in the front row and Taeyong cleared a spot on his desk. Johnny grabbed his books from his own desk, and set down his homework and meager lunch. It had been quiet in the room other than his shoes on the linoleum and the clock on the wall. Once he sat, he finally raised his eyes to look at his teacher.

Taeyong had eye bags again, but his brown eyes were soft and understanding, his lips pulled into a small smile. Johnny sucked in a breath and sighed as he looked at Taeyong’s chin, brows, hair, and eyes again. His inhale was filled with the scent he loved so much.

Johnny felt ashamed of having to come in for tutoring and also felt nervous about being alone with his teacher, even though this was all he ever wanted nowadays.

“I studied with Jaehyun last night, but I’m still a bit confused… and I _can’t_ fail my next quiz,” he admitted, finally putting his head on straight.

“It’s going to be alright. You’re not failing yet. We can pull your grades back up,” Taeyong encouraged and slid his lunchbox to the side a little more.

The student looked down at Taeyong’s lunch and saw the homemade kimchi and fried rice. It smelled quite appetizing in comparison to his cafeteria kimbap roll, packaged in saran wrap and probably made hours ago.

“You sm— seem nervous,” Taeyong faltered. Johnny knew he was going to say he _smelled_ nervous, because he probably did, but a teacher saying that to a student was too forward. If Taeyong was as acutely aware of Johnny’s scent as the student was to his teacher’s, Taeyong could probably read too much off of him by just his smell.

“I’m a little strung out, yeah,” Johnny murmured as he opened his book to the page they were working on yesterday, “I’ve been dealing with a lot recently, and I haven’t been sleeping very well.”

Taeyong let out a short, clipped breath.

“I understand that,” his teacher said, and Johnny caught the slight raise in his eyebrows, but didn’t ask more. The lines they had drawn in the sand. Johnny was curious, but didn’t press it, “Hmm,” Taeyong said, “No, let’s start earlier. You started struggling after your second test, so go to page eighteen. We’ll brush up on chapters three and four.”

Taeyong explained everything in the earlier chapters to Johnny, and the student could feel an air of calm wash over him as they began, and Johnny’s focus became trained. He wondered if Taeyong was purposefully making himself smell like this to ease him. He was taught long ago in elementary school about the pheromone effects emitted by all the genders, how an alpha can calm a distressed omega or beta just by releasing their scent, and vice versa.

Taeyong smelled like a version of home he had never had; fresh, warm, and familiar in the best ways. His voice was calm, encouraging, and most of all, patient. He explained things fluidly and clearly. When it was just the two of them, Johnny’s mind couldn’t wander. Taeyong’s voice, his hands on his book, his fingers pointing out his mistakes and guiding him through the passages of texts kept him grounded in a new, weird way.

It worked, somehow. Johnny though he would be unable to get anything done being in such close proximity to Taeyong like this, but instead he felt the most comfortable he had felt in days, and other feelings like that he didn’t want to define.

Taeyong paused every once in a while, to take up his chopsticks and eat a bite of his own food. Johnny ate his kimbap with his fingers, engulfing them whole and chewing quietly. Lunch was about fifty minutes, and Taeyong checked the clock every so often.

When his teacher finished with his lunch, he opened the top compartment of his tiered lunch box and revealed two mini-cakes.

Johnny smelled dark chocolate and fruit and looked up from his book to see Taeyong place one on the edge of his open workbook. It was a chocolate tartelette in a cute, lace-paper tray. It had red jelly across the surface of the chocolate and a bright pink raspberry on top for garnish.

“Here,” Taeyong offered, “I don’t think that one roll of kimbap could possibly have filled you up. I like to snack a little on my way home, but you can have my extra one today,” his teacher said as he peeled back the paper and took a bite out of his own chocolate tart.

Johnny didn’t favor sweets, but dark chocolate had a special spot in his heart, and he was excited to receive a special gift like this from Taeyong. He picked it up gently with his fingers and smelled it, taking in the notes of bitter chocolate and sweet fruit before he peeled off the lace and took a bite.

“ _Hmmm_ ,” he moaned, his eyes shutting as the flavors touched and danced on his tongue. It wasn’t too decadent for him, just right. The chocolate was soft and the raspberry jelly was explosively tart and sweet.

“You like it? Taeyong asked, “I made them,” he added, and Johnny looked up into his eyes. Taeyong had his elbow propped up on the desk, and his head resting delicately on the heel of his palm, his fingers curled into his cheek. His eyes were half lidded and happy as he watched Johnny eat, his mouth tilted into a soft smile.

“You cook _and_ you bake too? You’re perfect,” Johnny stated between one bite and the next, “Thank you. I don’t usually like sweets, but dark chocolate has always been an exception for me,” he murmured quietly, not realizing in the comfortable atmosphere they were in that Johnny had let slip a compliment, entering forbidden territory unintentionally.

Taeyong stumbled over his next bite, his chin ducking down and his hair falling forward. He covered his mouth as he looked away, but Johnny could see his eyes crinkled up in a bashful smile. It made Johnny’s heart flutter.

“Thank you,” Taeyong said sincerely when he turned back to look Johnny in the eye again. Up close like this, Johnny could see the shade of his eyes in the light of the windows, just like dark chocolate. He took in a breath through his nose and studied Taeyong’s face again, more in depth. His face was almost symmetrical. His nose was elegant, his lips not too thin, not too pouty, his eyebrows sculpted even though he could hardly see them from the back row; up close, Taeyong was incredibly pretty, almost cat-like with all his angles. He saw Taeyong’s eyes move across the points of his face too. Eyes, nose, lips, brow...

They weren’t paying attention to his homework anymore. Johnny breathed quietly through his nose, his lips pulling into a charming smile as he savored this moment.

The bell rang and it shot Johnny back to reality too quickly and he abruptly stood up from his seat. The bell, his sudden movement, and the noise of the chair clamoring backwards on the linoleum floor caused Taeyong to startle too, and Johnny slammed his workbook shut.

“I gotta get back to my seat,” he said, after he put the chair back with its proper desk, and stared down at his hands as he put his things back in order.

“And you should finish that, quickly,” Taeyong added, gesturing to the second half of Johnny’s tartelette on the desk. The student grabbed it and shoved the rest of the cake in his mouth, feeling guilty because he wanted to savor it for longer. As he went to the trashcan in the corner of the room to throw the lace paper and his trash from his kimbap away, the door to the classroom opened and students started trudging back inside.

Johnny walked up to Taeyong’s desk to get his homework and grammar book and he looked back into Taeyong’s eyes for a brief moment.

“Thank you,” Johnny murmured again with a respectful bow as he pulled himself away and back to his seat.

~

Johnny woke up the next morning from an exceedingly loaded dream to the sound of his phone nearly falling off the desk with its incessant buzzing. Ten and Taeyong were _both_ players in tonight's dream, and there was also chocolate syrup and raspberry jam involved.

He moved his legs and felt the sticky, wet aftermath in his shorts and he felt _mortified_. He slammed his hand down on his phone and saw the ID.

He still had yet to verbally talk to his mother; sending her ‘ _Leave me alone_ ’ texts, which she was clearly ignoring. He wondered briefly if opening the call and screaming at her would do the trick…

He had saved her number as ‘The Biggest Problem’, and knew she would smack him if she ever read that.

He took a deep breath and slapped his arm over his eyes, hiding himself in the crook of his elbow as he let it go to voicemail in his hand. He had to give Ten an answer soon, which meant he had to talk to Lucas first. He had to go to tutoring with Taeyong too. He should probably talk to his mom as well, because it looks like she has nothing better to do than harass her son from across the world, and he knows ignoring her is really not going to work for very much longer.

Johnny left his phone on his bed as he got up to go take a shower and wash the night-jizz from his body, and rid himself of this hypersexual scent.

~

“ _Hey, Lucas_ ,” Johnny called to his younger teammate in the locker rooms after practice that day. The tall alpha boy popped his head up over the lockers and looked over at Johnny with big eyes.

“ _Wassup_?” he asked lazily, his dark hair wet from the showers and slicked back.

“ _I gotta talk to you about somethin’_ ,” Johnny answered.

“Now?” he asked, his eyebrows scrunching up.

“ _Nah, in private_ ,” Johnny responded and turned back to his locker to pull on his shirt again. Jaehyun was giving him a side eye as the beta buckled his belt.

“ _Good luck_ ,” his best friend said under his breath as Johnny pulled on his blazer and slammed his locker shut, turning away and walking down the rows to Lucas’ locker. He stood at the edge of the lockers and kind of nodded the others away, to give the two alphas privacy. Lucas’ eyes were scanning Johnny, and he almost felt like the younger was sizing him up in a way that alphas tend to do.

“So, Ten asked me to sleep over at his place this weekend,” Johnny started, not wanting to beat around the bush, “I want to keep the air cool between us, so like a good friend I came to ask for your permission.”

“Do… do you like him that way?” Lucas asked quietly.

“Not really,” Johnny answered, “He’s my friend, and you’re my friend. If you tell me you’re not comfortable with it, I’ll tell him no. He asked me to help him out with something,” he said. Lucas didn’t look him in the eyes. They both knew what that something was. If Lucas was crushing on Ten, and had dated him before, then Lucas would obviously be able to tell when Ten was going into heat just by the way he smelled. And by the way Ten talked, probably all their friends knew by now.

“What do I care?” Lucas said with a frown, “Ten’s not my boyfriend,” he glowered.

“...So, you’re fine with it?” Johnny asked.

“ _Why wouldn’t I be_?” he asked back. Johnny could see Lucas’ conflicting emotions on his face and Johnny gave him a bigger-brother type look, trying to coax the truth out but Lucas didn’t take it that way, “ _Really_ ,” he pushed, “if Ten asked you first, it’s clearly what he wants. You should do it.”

“ _Are you sure_?”

“ _Yes_ ,” Lucas finished, but the way he slammed his locker shut said otherwise. Johnny lingered there, staring straight into Lucas’ glare, unflinching. He gave a few moments pause, giving his friend time to take it back, to change his mind, to tell Johnny no… but he didn’t. The Chinese boy must have had more pride than Johnny.

“ _Okay_ ,” he said, and turned away.

“ _Okay_ ,” Lucas answered, having the final word and Johnny didn’t let it get to him as he walked out of the locker rooms, to grab a coffee and another roll of kimbap and go back to his homeroom for lunchtime tutoring.

~

Taeyong wasn’t as surprised this time when Johnny walked through his classroom door during lunch, and shut the door after him. Today, Taeyong was eating spicy beef stew, and he moved his tablet and school itinerary aside to make room for Johnny to sit at the edge of his desk again.

Johnny sat and unrolled his kimbap, then opened his grammar book.

“Alright, we left off on chapter four yesterday?” Taeyong asked, and Johnny nodded. They slipped into that same comfortable aura like yesterday, pausing only to take bites of their separate meals. Tomorrow was the quiz that would either make or break his spot on the team, so Johnny was really trying to pull it together to get a 70% or higher.

He was getting it. Sort of. Not all the way, but more than last week.

Taeyong put away his empty bowl when he finished his lunch and pulled out dessert again. One more chocolate raspberry tart, and a lemony custard bar with powdered sugar dusted on top. Taeyong placed the chocolate one at the edge of Johnny’s workbook again, and Johnny snuck a glance at Taeyong’s lunchbox and spied another lemon bar hiding in the top compartment, probably for Taeyong to eat later on his drive home.

He had planned for this.

“It’s my last chocolate one. I didn’t think you’d like the lemon and sugar ones,” Taeyong whispered. Johnny had a secret smile on his face as he thanked his teacher for the gracious dessert for the second day in a row. It was just as delicious yesterday as it was today, and this time he had more time to savor it.

As Taeyong was explaining a sentence to him, Johnny felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and he stilled.

In the back of the class, Taeyong was usually too far away to hear when Johnny’s phone vibrated, but now, sitting right beside him, both of them heard it. Taeyong stopped mid-explanation and looked at Johnny, his air changing into more of an authoritative teacher feeling with just a side glance from his eyes.

“I know students are allowed to have their cellphones out during lunch period, but would you mind turning it to silent while we worked?” he asked, his tone more serious than it was before. Johnny felt embarrassment spread through him as he quietly slipped the phone out of his pocket and read the caller ID, already knowing who it was without looking.

Johnny let out a soft sigh, and Taeyong noticed immediately, and leaned over to read the ID too.

“Who is ‘The Biggest Problem’?” he asked. Johnny clicked the volume button down on his phone and the vibrating stopped, but the call kept happening. He’d let it go to voicemail like he’s been doing for the last few days.

“It’s my mother, calling from the states,” Johnny murmured and looked up at the clock, “It’s… almost nine at night for her,” he put the phone face down on his workbook and leaned back in his chair to rub his eyes and the bridge of his nose with exasperation, “She’s been harassing my grandmother to talk to me, and then my dad gave her my number without my permission and she’s been blowing up my phone for the last three days. I’ve been avoiding her calls…” he explained, and then looked up at Taeyong’s face, “I can’t avoid her forever, I know that, but if I answer the phone, it’s just going to be the same… _stuff_ ,” he stressed, trying not to curse.

Taeyong set down his pencil and folded his hands together on the desk.

“If you want to talk about it, I’m here to listen,” Taeyong said softly, his voice warm and reassuring. Johnny took another breath through his nose.

“Have you ever had an addict in your life?” he started. Taeyong looked away for a moment, and Johnny saw a memory pass through Taeyong’s mind; his eyebrows furrowed up and his mouth opened slightly.

“No… but I’ve had someone similar to that in my life before,” he answered. Johnny felt himself connect to his teacher in a whole new way upon hearing this piece of information.

“My mother is an alcoholic who can’t accept that she has a problem. It ruined my relationship with her, and her relationship with my dad,” Johnny muttered, “She kept having to get new jobs, and move, and I was jostled back and forth between my dad’s house and her crappy apartments. I was in three different high schools during what was supposed to be my final year of high school, but because of my mother’s negligence I had skipped so many days… I couldn’t graduate,” Johnny looked around the classroom with a shrug, “I’m not supposed to be here. I should be in _college_ right now, but because of my mother’s failings, I’m not. I’ve had to clean her drunk-self off the floor of the living room or the bathroom too many times. Too many days I had to skip school because she couldn’t drive me, and she needed me to help her sober up. She was ruining her life and she was determined to take me down with her, because I’m her only child.”

Taeyong was quiet as Johnny continued.

“My dad… while it’s not liquor, it’s his own addiction to his business. He wants me to be a lawyer like him, and work under him, and take over his business one day, and that just sounds… _terrible_. My mom wants me to be a doctor, because I’m good at math, and then I could make enough money ‘ _to take care of her_ ’, which is a phrase I can’t bear to hear come out of her mouth one more time,” he explained, letting his burdens all fall out, “As their only child, I have so many expectations put upon me. My dad nearly disowned me during a fight one night when I told him I didn’t want to be a lawyer. I wanted to play piano and make music—”

“Did you ever get to?” Taeyong interrupted, “Sorry, I… did you ever get to take piano lessons?”

Johnny nodded.

“It’s one of the only good memories of my mother I have now, sitting and playing the piano with her before she became a different person. I was so young, my feet couldn’t touch the pedals, so she sat with me and pressed them for me. Honestly… I wanted to take music and dance for club period,” he admitted and looked up at Taeyong with a bittersweet smile, “but I figured I should put a little distance between you and I, and I like basketball too. I’m good at it. And Jaehyun offered to take it with me,” he shared, “I just don’t know what’s going to happen if I answer this call,” he said and flipped over his phone only to see that it was going off again, but this time silently, “Actually no, I know _exactly_ what’s going to happen when I answer this call, and I moved across the entire planet to avoid this, but no matter how many times I have this conversation, _nothing_ is going to change. She has to make a change herself…” there was a moment of pause before the call ended, and the atrocious notification that read ‘ _12 missed calls from…_ ’ showed up on his screen. Johnny took up his phone and put it back in his blazer pocket, “I had to grow up so fast, Taeyong. I was fourteen when I had to become the parent to my own out-of-control, mother. How is that fair?”

There was a moment of sad, uncomfortable silence before Taeyong cleared his throat.

“...You just called me Taeyong,” his teacher interjected quietly, breaking the tense and somber mood. Johnny’s heart skipped a beat.

“Oh. I’m— I didn’t mean to, I’m so sorry, Mr. Lee,” he scraped, trying to correct his mistake, and feeling heat rise to his face.

“It’s okay, I’ll let it slide. We’ve been talking about some pretty heavy stuff today,” his teacher said, “but do be careful about making that slip in front of others,” he said and Johnny’s heart leapt when Taeyong put a hand on his knee under the desk, “I can’t give you advice about how to handle your mother. All I can say is… I’m happy you opened up to me a little bit. When basketball season ends in the end of winter, you should try out for music and dance,” he encouraged, “I’d be happy to have you on our team, and I’d like to hear you play the piano sometime.”

The bell rang and Taeyong gave his knee a slight squeeze before he removed his hand, and Johnny’s heart felt like it was about to cave in on itself at the lack of touch.

“We didn’t get a lot done today,” Johnny murmured dejectedly, looking down at chapter five in his book.

“No, but that’s alright, we got other important things done today,” he said, “Study chapter five tonight, come in for tutoring again tomorrow for chapters six and seven, and you’ll be ready for the test by the end of the day, for sure,” he said with a soft smile which Johnny couldn’t help but return.

“...Will you bring me another dessert?” Johnny asked teasingly, trying to make the conversation lighter and Taeyong’s lips pursed, but his eyes narrowed playfully.

“I’ll see what I can do,” he offered. Johnny’s heart grew again. He didn’t want to beam too much over special treatment, because he knew how delicate this was, but the idea of being special to Taeyong and eating his homemade sweets made him feel incredibly giddy. He could even acquire a taste for lemon and sugar bars if Taeyong was the one offering them to him.

Johnny held out his pinky to make a promise, and Taeyong smiled. He humored the student, and they linked their pinkies together for a brief moment before they broke apart and Johnny gathered his supplies and went back to his seat, his heart lighter.

~

During his bus ride home, Johnny pulled out his cell phone to occupy his time, and he cleared his call history from his mother, and checked his texts. He saw one from Ten and remembered their conversation from a few days ago.

‘ _So what’s it gonna be?_ ’ was all the Thai boy texted and Johnny felt a smirk slide onto his face.

‘ _Yeah, I can help you out tomorrow night. Do you want me to bring you anything?_ ’ he typed back.

‘ _Just a pizza and a solid one._ ’ he answered and Johnny laughed to himself.

 

 


	5. Johnny and Ten

Johnny told his grandmother the next morning that he would be sleeping over at a friend’s house that night. She agreed, and told Johnny that she would be having dinner with his aunt, and not to worry about her. Johnny packed an overnight bag and brought it to school with him, intending on shoving it in his locker before making his way to his classroom.

He met Sicheng and Jaehyun in the hallway and the three wandered into the classroom. The scents in the class were headier than usual for Johnny today, and he realized near instantly it was because Ten was there, standing by the windows with Yuta. Johnny wandered over curiously and before he even got within five feet of them, Ten’s thick scent washed through him. The Thai boy had always smelled naturally sweet, but today he smelled like sun-ripened fruit, caramelized in warm sugar.

“ _Why_ are you _here_?” Johnny asked with a chuckle, and without a hello.

“That’s what I asked!” Yuta said, side eyeing Johnny. Ten smiled up at him, and Johnny could see he was already affected by his hormones. His smile was dopey, and his eyes disappeared into slivers when he grinned.

“I have to take a test in my Mandarin class today, then I’m going home early,” he explained, his speech was airier than normal, “I told you that my international family was going to be out, right?”

“Yes,” Johnny snickered, “You wanna give me the address?” he asked.

“Mm-hm,” Ten nodded and left the group to go to his desk.

“Lucas gave me the ‘ _A-Okay’_ ,” Johnny mumbled quietly when Ten was away from earshot.

“ _Ooh_ ,” Yuta’s eyebrows arched up, “Was that an awkward conversation?” he asked nosily.

“Only a little,” Johnny admitted. Ten wandered back to the group and handed Johnny a small slip with an address on it, which Johnny pocketed swiftly, “Today is my Korean test, if I fail it, I’m off the basketball team,” Johnny shared. Ten whined and put his hand on Johnny’s arm.

“No way! I want to see you play next weekend. Did you study?”

“I did. With Jaehyun, by myself last night, _and_ I’ve been going to lunchtime tutoring with Mr. Lee,” Johnny admitted.

“So that’s where you’ve been,” Sicheng noted quietly, and Johnny nodded, scowling just a little.

“I really need to pass. I’m in the danger zone and I’m going to one last cram study session today at lunch and if I pass my test, then I’ll be free to play next weekend, but if I fail and my grade drops below a 50, I’ll get pulled from the team,” he explained. Ten, who still had his hand on Johnny’s forearm leaned in close and whispered.

“Whatever happens, I’ll be there to congratulate you or cheer you up,” he purred and Johnny gave Ten a quirk of an eyebrow.

“You need to go _home_. You’re going to distract the whole class today,” he said with a smile and Ten’s perfect white teeth beamed up at him.

“I can make it,” he insisted.

“Seo Youngho,” Taeyong called softly before the bell even rang. Johnny looked at Taeyong, who beckoned Johnny over with a wave of his hand. Johnny excused himself from his friends, and nudged Ten off of him to go up to his teacher, his heart beat just a little bit as he took in Taeyong’s outfit for the day. A white button up with the sleeves rolled to the elbow, and a steel silver vest, with slacks and black leather shoes. He had on a pair of black and gold glasses, and Johnny’s eyes dipped to his top button which was undone and Johnny could see a thin gold necklace chain underneath.

“You’re coming in for tutoring today at lunch, correct?” he asked, his voice soft so others didn’t hear. Johnny forced his gaze up to meet those pretty round eyes.

“Yes, Mr. Lee,” Johnny nodded.

“Okay,” he answered and his eyes brightened as his lips pulled into a small smile, “Don’t worry about grabbing a lunch from downstairs today, just bring yourself a drink and your workbooks,” he said, and Johnny’s interest skyrocketed. The bell rang and Taeyong shooed him away, calling all the students to find their seats.

~

At practice, Johnny noticed everyone was tense. He had a private talk with the basketball coach about his grades, but the news of his uncertainty of being on the team come gameday had still gotten around. Mark and Jaehyun’s brows were tight, so were Lucas’, but for a different reason.

While they played a skirmish game that day, Lucas shouldered Johnny hard as he was making a jump, and knocked him off balance, causing his release to become off point, and he missed the hoop. The younger gave him a half-assed ‘ _sorry man,’_ but Johnny could see the opposite look in his eyes. Johnny took it with grace and forced himself to chuckle it off. Lucas didn’t look Johnny’s way once after that, but the older boy figured that after the weekend the moodiness would pass. Things would be smoothed over with a little time.

Jaemin, Haechan, and all the younger boys were griping about Johnny’s unstable standing on the team, and it made the hairs on the back of his neck prickle. When things were his problem, it was fine, but when his problems became other people’s problems, it made him feel like a nuisance. They knew that his presence on the team was all riding on this test he’d be taking this afternoon, and a few of them made Johnny promise to mass text them all in their group chat when he found out his score.

“I don’t even know if he’ll grade the test today. I won’t find out until Monday,” when he said that, Mark and a few others growled in frustration. The rest of practice, Johnny could almost hear their thoughts on the subject, and Johnny didn’t like it. He didn’t want to be the source of this drama, and he didn’t want any added pressure on him.

After practice, Johnny showered quicker than the rest of them, excusing himself to go to his study time with his teacher, and he went to the cafeteria with Jaehyun in tow. He grabbed himself a bottle of cold coffee, and his best friend gave him a few words of encouragement away from the ears of the others, telling him to take his time, forget about basketball right now, and just focus on his grade for this one test.

As he headed back upstairs to his classroom, he found himself sipping his coffee in between long breaths. He had to let it all go right now. His phone buzzed once in his pocket, and he pulled it out to check. It was a text from Ten.

‘ _I’m leaving the school now. Good luck on your test. See you tonight ;)_ ’

He didn’t respond. He silenced his phone, learning from his mistake yesterday, and entered the open door of his classroom just in time to slip his phone back into his pocket.

The classroom was empty, to his confusion. Taeyong wasn’t there, and everyone’s backpacks were gone, save for the few who would be coming back after lunch for Korean class. Johnny wandered back to his desk slowly, sipping his coffee, and he slipped his pencil and his grammar book out of his desk, then meandered back to the front of the class.

He stole a chair from the desk at the front row again, and dragged it up to Taeyong’s desk. Since he was there before Taeyong, and he didn’t have any food to eat, he flipped open his book to chapter six to review. It didn’t take long, and Johnny had only made his way through a few sentences before Taeyong came into the classroom. He had a miniature crockpot in his hands, a plastic bag filled with tupperware, and a two bowls placed on top, his shoulders were drawn up as he balanced all of his things and Johnny immediately got out of his seat to help him. He grabbed the bowls and tupperware, leaving Taeyong with just the crockpot.

“Ah, thank you,” Taeyong sighed, “Would you shut the door, please? This has been in the teacher’s lounge simmering for the last five hours, so it’s sure to be good.”

“What did you make?” Johnny asked as he placed the plastic bag on the desk and pulled out kimchi and two portioned servings of clear, starch noodles.

“ _Galbitang_ ,” Taeyong cooed, “It’s my grandmother’s recipe, and one of the best soups you’ll ever taste,” he said and Johnny helped his teacher get the bowls ready, “we put the noodles in the bowls first,” Taeyong instructed, and Johnny opened the plastic tub and dropped the coil of pre-cooked noodles in, and Taeyong produced a ladle from the plastic bag, “then the soup.”

As soon as the top to the crockpot was lifted, a billow of steam and a rush of savory flavors hit his nose. Radish, onion, leek, garlic, ginger, and— most importantly, _beef_.

“ _Oh my god_ ,” Johnny slurred and he shut his eyes, “that smells _amazing_ ,” he complimented.

“Thank you!” Taeyong chirped, his eyes happy, and his smile curled up at the corners. Taeyong spooned the clear soup into the bowls and made sure to place a large piece of spare rib, the bone still in it, into each of their bowls, “Just wait ‘til you try it.”

Johnny was grinning too, his anticipation for this unbelievable treat was surmounting as his teacher passed him a spoon and a pair of chopsticks.

“Thank you for this… you really didn’t have to,” Johnny said as he picked up his first bite. Taeyong gave him eyebrows, and Johnny slurped the noodles up noisily. He had to cover his eyes as he moaned ‘ _Oh my god_ ,’ again, and made Taeyong laugh. The soup was light, but very flavorful, and Johnny could tell the meat was prepared in such a way that it nearly fell off the bone when he picked at it with his utensils.

Johnny spent the first five minutes eating away and holding back some inappropriate yummy-moans.

“This is seriously delicious. I want this every time I’m sick for the rest of my life,” Johnny shared and Taeyong didn’t respond to that, didn’t laugh, instead he picked up his bowl with both hands and slurped it down quickly. Johnny watched his Adam’s apple bob with each gulp, and the student quickly looked down at his bowl to do the same when Taeyong lowered his dish from his face.

“Hmmm,” Taeyong hummed, and he watched his student finish his bowl in the same fashion. “It’s one of my favorite get-well foods, too,” he said, there was a moment, when Johnny leaned back in his chair after he finished slurping down the end of the bowl, and the two of them looked at each other again.

Johnny craved moments like this, when they were alone, and they could look each other in the eye without worrying about anyone else around them. He had been secretly very happy with going to lunch-time tutoring because he got Taeyong just to himself. He doesn’t know when this will stop, or when he’ll get it next, so he savored the little time he has, every time he got it. Johnny’s heart pulled forward again like it did the first day of class, and the student had to force back his feelings, but all he wanted to do was get closer and _touch_ him. Put a hand over his, touch his knee, feel how soft his hair was, how warm his skin would feel.

“Do you want some more?” Taeyong asked softly, and Johnny felt blessed and spoiled as Taeyong spooned him out another bowl of soup, “we need to work while we eat this time,” Taeyong murmured, and Johnny tore his gaze from Taeyong’s dark eyes and looked down at his horrid textbook.

The test he needed to pass was looming forward with every moment, and he knew he shouldn’t be focusing on Taeyong, or home cooked food. He needed to study, so he could start passing his tests. He sat up straight in his chair again, and cleared his throat.

“I suppose you’re right,” he admitted, and Taeyong pushed his empty bowl to the side and set Johnny’s refilled bowl next to his book to make room for them to study. After Taeyong pushed the remains of lunch away, he scooted his chair closer. When he leaned forward to explain the parts that Johnny struggled on, he tried not to lean closer in response.

After a few minutes, his mind switched over to work mode, and he forced himself to concentrate. He took bites spoonfuls of soup in between work, taking this bowl in slowly to concentrate more on the workbook in front of him. With ten minutes left in lunch, suddenly, the divining moment happened and it clicked for him.

Johnny eagerly finished chapter seven, the test for that chapter would happen in less than a half hour, and he flipped back in the chapters to review his notes. His eyes flew over the pages, flipping through them, exclaiming that he finally, after weeks of struggling, was _getting_ it. Taeyong held up his hand for a congratulatory high five and Johnny happily, joyously, raised his hand to accept it.

“You’re going to do great, Johnny. I know you will,” Taeyong praised with a smile, and Johnny’s eyes snapped up to meet his again, with astonishment, pointing at his teacher with one finger.

“...You just called me ‘ _Johnny_ ’,” he stated with a big smile and Taeyong, caught off guard, blinked at him rapidly.

“I— ah…” Johnny sucked in a slow steadying breath as he watched Taeyong’s neck pinken with what could only be embarrassment, “Don’t get used it to it,” he tried to scrape himself together, “It was a slip of the tongue, and it won’t happen again,” he murmured hurriedly, but Johnny could see the way his shoulders raised in defense.

“It’s okay,” Johnny smiled encouragingly and tipped his head down, feeling hot under the collar himself, “I’d prefer it if you called me ‘Johnny’,” he added. Taeyong swallowed, and it was just like the swallow in the library. Nervous, silent, but so very honest.

The bell rang, cutting their time apart, and forcing Johnny back into the role of being just a student to his teacher. Mr. Lee’s head tipped to the side just slightly, his expression pained.

“You _know_ why I can’t do that,” Taeyong whispered guiltily, and he stood up to gather his lunch supplies together. Johnny’s heart pulled inside his ribs again and it ached at those words, “I need to take all this back to the teacher’s lounge. You should go back to your seat and keep studying until class begins,” Taeyong suggested, and Johnny stood up.

There was a feeling of awkwardness between them, and Johnny sincerely wanted it to end, and wished he could hear Taeyong call him ‘Johnny’ in that fond voice one more time.

Johnny helped Taeyong gather his things, and Taeyong left the room, leaving the door open so the other students could wander in. Johnny put the chair he borrowed back at its desk, and returned to the back of the classroom to go over his workbook one more time.

He heard other students come in, and Mark and Lucas came up to him. Mark took the seat next to him at the back of the class, and Lucas remained standing in front of his desk.

“ _You ready_?” Mark asked.

“ _I think so_ ,” Johnny answered, but kept his eyes down at his book, frantically cramming.

“Smells good in here,” Lucas murmured.

“Mr. Lee brings his lunch every day. It always smells delicious,” Johnny said, “I’m ready to eat lunch outside again after today,” he forced himself to say, but he didn’t really mean it. He liked being around his friends, but he liked being around their teacher more.

~

The clock on the wall was starting to give Johnny anxiety. The ticking, and the sound of pencils, and the flipping of stapled packets of paper was all that could be heard in the otherwise quiet classroom.

Johnny sat with Lucas and Mark on either side of him, and he tried to pace himself through the chapter seven quiz. When Lucas got out of his seat before anyone else to turn in his completed quiz, Johnny’s eyes followed him, and his annoyance increased.

Taeyong smiled politely at Lucas as he took the quiz from him, and Taeyong caught Johnny’s eye and gave him an encouraging nod. Johnny looked up at Lucas, and the younger alpha had a pleased smirk on his face, like he was challenging Johnny just a little bit.

Johnny forced his eyes back down at his test, but he could feel his lip curling.

There were a few things on the quiz he didn’t quite understand, and he made up an answer. He got most of it. More than the last few quizzes. He knew he needed at least an 80% on this quiz to boost his grade. If he got a 70% he would be okay, but he would still be in the danger zone. A 70% would keep him where he’s at, but an 80% or above would bolster him. He kept writing, trying not to think about basketball, and the team he’d be letting down if he failed this one quiz that he knew, in the back of his mind, would be entirely insignificant in the long run.

Mark got up a few minutes later to turn in his paper, and Johnny had to breath himself through his growing anxiety. He just needed to finish, it didn’t matter if others were faster than him, he just needed to do _his_ best. He took another settling breath through his nose and didn’t look up this time when Mark returned to the seat next to him.

Johnny continued scribbling, trying to feel confident but he was still quite rattled inside his head. He finished his paper and got up to turn it in, his stomach twisting and his brain too filled with the Korean alphabet. The rest of class felt blurry. Taeyong taught, and Johnny was trying to keep up and pay attention, but his leg kept bouncing. He felt like he needed a run.

He excused himself to the bathroom, and he felt a little more centered after he washed his hands and face. He returned to his class, and slipped back into his seat wordlessly, avoiding the eyes of his classmates and his teacher.

When class ended, Johnny’s heart felt like he had drank ten cups of coffee and his stomach was feeling unwell. He didn’t like this anxiety. He nodded to Mark, urging him to leave first with Lucas, and Johnny intentionally stayed behind, lingering and putting away his school things slowly so the other students could leave first. He felt Taeyong’s curious gaze on him before he even looked up. Johnny stood from his seat and pulled his backpack onto his shoulders, then hesitated before dragging his shoes up to the front desk.

“Mr. Lee?” Johnny asked quietly, ducking his head down. Before Taeyong could answer, Johnny asked his question, “I know this is special treatment, but I can’t rest comfortably this weekend thinking about my grade. Could you please, just this once, grade my quiz now?” he asked, his chin tucked shamefully.

He didn’t like feeling vulnerable, or showing that he was upset, or shaken, or any of those things. He only wanted to show Taeyong his mature side, how he could remain collected even when things in his life weren’t going well. He couldn't bring his eyes up to look at Taeyong, and when he heard his crush suck in a breath, he braced himself for the worst.

“Take a seat, Youngho,” Taeyong’s soft voice offered, “This will only take a couple minutes,” he said and he sat down at his own desk and picked out Johnny’s quiz from the stack.

“Thank you,” Johnny said gratefully as he took the first-row seat in front of Taeyong’s desk, setting his bag on the ground next to him and folded his hands on the desk.

His knee was bouncing and he was unconsciously biting at his thumb nail. Taeyong had a green felt pen in his hand as he was reading over Johnny’s quiz. Every time his pen touched Johnny’s paper, the student’s stomach felt like retching.

He didn’t want to fail. Not for himself, not for Taeyong, not for his team...

The clock on the wall was deafening to him again and when Taeyong flipped his page back over to the front side, and wrote his grade at the top, he raised his head up with a small smile and pushed it across the desk towards Johnny.

Johnny’s heart hammered in his chest as he stood and reached for the paper. At the top, right next to his name was the number, written and circled in green with a smiley face next to it.

82%.

Johnny’s heart slowed and his face cracked into the first real smile of the day and he looked up at Taeyong to see his beloved teacher smiling back at him.

“See? I told you you could do it,” he beamed, “You’ve worked very hard. I’m proud of you,” he said and those words hit the young alpha like a sack full of bricks. He felt tears start to stand in his eyes. His grandma told him she was proud of him all the time, and he had heard his mother and father say those words to him a handful of times over the years, but it was different coming from Taeyong.

“Thank you, Mr. Lee,” Johnny sucked in a happy breath and tucked his passing grade into his backpack with glee. His fingers were shaking by the time he stood back up again and he tried to discreetly wipe his eyes on the sleeves of his blazer.

‘ _I’m proud of you_.’

He wanted to hear Taeyong say that again and again.

“We went through a bit of a roller coaster this week, you and I. I want you to know that… you can talk to me anytime you need to. About school, or family, or friends… if you’re having troubles, I’d like to do anything I can to help you. You have my work email if you need to reach me outside of school hours,” he said, switching the mood for a moment, before clearing his throat slightly, “I’m excited to watch your game next week. I’m sure you’ll make the whole team shine,” he said, and Johnny’s eyes met Taeyong’s warm ones.

“You’re going to come to the game?” he asked, breathless.

“Of course,” Taeyong said, and Johnny could feel he had more to say, but his teacher looked down and swallowed his final thought, “Go on now, have a good weekend,” Taeyong said, gesturing to the door. Johnny pulled his backpack onto his shoulder again, and the two of them stared at each other for a moment longer, “ _Go_ ,” Taeyong said again. Johnny nodded, and bowed gratefully to Taeyong before sweeping out of the class on relieved and excited feet.

He pulled out his phone the second he was in the halls and mass texted his friends and his team his score, and the emoji of the party streamers and a basketball.

He got a slew of responses and cheers, and then a picture text from Ten.

He had almost entirely forgotten about the omega he had promised to take care of, and he saw the cute but suggestive photo of Ten with a lazy smile and half lidded eyes, laying on what might have been a couch or a bed in a hoodie and underwear.

‘ _Good! Now where are you and the pizza you promised me?_ ’

Johnny snickered to himself and he opened his locker to pull out his overnight bag he packed this morning. As he walked off of campus, Taeyong’s voice echoed in his mind more than anyone else's.

‘ _You’re going to do great, Johnny._ ’

‘ _You’ve worked very hard._ ’

‘ _I’m proud of you._ ’

Those words made his head spin. He felt like he was walking on clouds as he entered the pizza shop. He picked up one large pie and carried it dutifully to the bus stop. It was warm on his lap, and he knew his mind should be more focused on Ten, but he couldn’t help but think about Taeyong and how he felt when he was with that particular omega.

~

Ten’s international family lived in a cute house in a quiet neighborhood with a front garden, he sent Ten a text when he was close and he checked the address twice before he got to the door and knocked. When the door opened, the thick smell of heated omega nearly knocked him over. He almost let his eyes flicker at the smell.

Ten’s fruity aroma overpowered his senses. It was so different from Taeyong’s earthy, buttery scent. He was like bursting, overripe fruit juice.

The silver haired boy stood in the doorway, leaning his body against the jam with a lazy smile. He wore a sweatshirt and a pair of short boxers. The same one’s in the photo.

“ _Heeeey_ ,” he cooed, “I’m so ready,” he laughed. He sounded tipsy, his laugh like a bubbly giggle. Johnny stepped inside and his spine tingled.

The house was different from what he imagined. He could picture Ten in some swanky apartment, top floor, with a minimalist layout, and a tiny, fluffy dog. This ultra-homey look didn’t suit him much, rugs in the hallway, pictures on the narrow walls… but the whole house was drowning in his scent right now.

“I’ve been hungry for, like, an hour, but I wanted to wait for you,” Ten said as he led Johnny into the kitchen. It was bizarre seeing Ten in something that wasn’t their school uniform, with his shoes off and in something as domestic as boy shorts and a sweater. There was something about this whole feeling, the house, Ten, and his unraveled tension from earlier, that made him feel tilted.

They stood in the kitchen and Johnny studied Ten’s face as he slowly chewed his slice of pizza, leaning unceremoniously against the counter of the kitchen, his eyes closed as he enjoyed this moment.

Johnny had never been through a heat before, he wondered if the world felt slower, because Ten definitely looked like his reflexes were not as they should be.

Ten and him made weird, awkward conversation. He asked Johnny how tutoring went and Johnny realized he didn’t want to talk about it. Talking to Ten about Mr. Lee  was too strange for him. He felt like these two worlds and these two versions of him-- the version of him who was going to fuck Ten, and the version of him who craved devotion to Taeyong-- should _not_ intermingle.

“It was… fine,” Johnny managed, “I passed the test, so that’s good,” he realized that this was too entirely awkward, “How are you feeling right now?” he asked, pulling the conversation in a different direction.

“Hmmmmmm,” Ten stretched out, shifting his weight on his feet and leaning his hip on the counter, “I’m a little warm, kinda fuzzy. It hasn’t hit me all the way yet, but my heats aren’t bad in comparison to other omegas,” he explained, “I mean… we could go back to my room right now, and it’d take like ten minutes and I know it would hit me,” he said.

“I didn’t think it… worked like that,” Johnny admitted. Ten cocked an eyebrow at him.

“Have you ever been with someone on their heat?” he asked, Johnny nodded his head.

“Yeah, two others, but they were both girls,” he said, “Can someone… trigger you like that?”

“Yeah, sometimes. I can get it to start myself if I tried, but like… it’s better if it’s with someone else, it feels more natural,” he said, then shrugged, “But again, I’m not like typical omegas. I don’t _need_ the way that others might need, and my heats are relatively short,” he tossed the crust of his finished pizza slice into the box.

“You said you could handle it yourself, it’s just better if someone was there for you,” Johnny recalled, and Ten nodded as he picked up a fresh slice.

“Yeah,” he said through a full mouth and took a moment to swallow, “I could just hang out here alone all weekend helping myself, but I know if I get help from an alpha, I’ll be over it by tomorrow night at the latest.”

“So, I’m just your booty call?” Johnny said with a laugh.

“Yeah but like… I called you for _my_ booty, not yours,” Ten flirted.

There was another minute of silence as the two of them just stood there and ate, the island counter between them, and Ten’s smell nearly assaulting him. After Ten finished eating, he tossed the crust of his second slice into the pizza box, and closed it up.

“I’ll have more of this later,” he promised, then came around the counter to Johnny’s side. The taller boy felt something stir in his gut as Ten advanced on him. Johnny put his half-finished slice on top of the pizza box just as Ten linked his arms around Johnny’s shoulders.

“You smell good,” the omega noted as he leaned in close. Johnny had to remind himself that this was fine, as he circled his arms around Ten’s tiny waist, and closed his eyes.

They kissed, and Johnny wished he felt more.

Ten’s mouth was releasing soft pants and his hands clutched at Johnny’s blazer, and the alpha could smell his scent deepen incrementally.

Ten pressed himself up against Johnny fully and Johnny tried to force the same enthusiasm, gripping Ten’s tiny waist through his sweatshirt. In a moment, small, warm hands were tangling up into his hairline and Johnny felt his heart hammering inside his chest. Ten’s wet tongue lapped out against his lips and Johnny opened his mouth to meet it.

Ten tasted so sweet, even after eating savory pizza, and Johnny felt his stomach coil as they kissed deeper than before. Ten nearly rutted up against him, and he felt the counter digging into the base of his spine. The smaller male pulled back after a half minute, his cheeks flushed and his breath thin.

“ _Okay. Bedroom. Now_ ,” he said and took Johnny by the wrist and turned around to pull him out of the kitchen. Johnny felt a sense of foreboding as he was dragged down the hall and into a small bedroom. He didn’t even have the time to take in the decor of the room before Ten turned to him and fell onto his back on the twin bed, pulling Johnny on top of him.

In seconds they were back inside a fevered kiss. Ten’s hands were wily and Johnny had his blazer off before he even realized it. Ten had his hand on the alpha’s tie, holding his face close even though Ten’s other hand was snaking between them, scraping his nails over his stomach through his shirt.

Johnny stiffened when Ten’s warm hand cupped him through his slacks, and Ten’s lips paused. Johnny pulled back a little and met Ten’s eyes. The omega’s lips were wet and his eyes were heavy and glassy. Johnny swallowed regretfully but before Ten could question him, Johnny flipped them, putting Ten on top, and hopefully dodging the fact that he just wasn’t hard.

He hoped that after rolling around with Ten for a little bit, he could push past his guilt-ridden brain block. He had no reason not to have sex with Ten. He had no reason to feel guilty, but he did. It just felt _wrong_.

Johnny tried to grind against Ten more, willing his brain to calm down, and begging his dick to act accordingly. Ten sat up over him, grinding his butt down against Johnny’s hips as his hands worked quickly to take off Johnny’s tie and undo the buttons on his shirt. Johnny’s hands were on Ten’s hips and he bit his bottom lip.

“What’s wrong?” Ten asked, breathless. He tried to rut harder onto Johnny’s hips, but it was evident to the both of them that Johnny was flaccid.

The smell, the timing, the person… none of this felt right. Johnny sighed and dropped his hands to the side, releasing Ten from his grip.

“ _I don’t think I can do this_ ,” he whispered to himself and to Ten. The omega’s hands stopped with Johnny’s buttons and he felt Ten’s legs lock on his sides.

“ _What_?” Ten asked, his voice going up an octave. Johnny raised his head, and sat up. He sighed regretfully, and he shook his head as he finally admitted it to himself and the boy on top of him.

“ _I can’t do this, Ten_ ,” he answered truthfully, and Ten’s face showed desperate shock as his mouth fell open in a half moan, Johnny put his hands on Ten’s sides and lightly pushed the smaller boy off him, putting him on his back on the bed, and Johnny sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He sat there for a moment, his shirt open, his tie around his neck, and Ten’s hands grasping at the back of his shirt. He turned around and gave Ten a sad, apologetic look, “ _I’m sorry. I’m going to go call Lucas for you,_ ” he said and slowly peeled himself from Ten’s grip..

Ten’s moan of disbelief sounded horrified.

It was _crazy_. Johnny didn’t have claim to Ten or Taeyong but he couldn’t bring himself to touch Ten like this. His smell drove him crazy in a different way, a way that made red warning flags go off in his mind.

Ten actually whimpered when Johnny pulled away completely and pushed himself off the bed.

“ _Why_?” the younger asked, “ _I thought this was okay_.”

“ _I thought it was going to be okay too_ ,” Johnny answered, “ _But I’m just… too in my head to do this with you the right way. You should be doing this with someone who really wants to make you feel good,_ ” he said, “ _I’m just… not that person_ ,” he explained the best he could, thankful that he could say it in his first language, even though Ten was the one getting the short end of the stick, “ _I’m sorry._ ”

“ _You…_ _you suck, John Suh_!!” Ten whined and rolled over onto his stomach, clutching a pillow from the top of his bed close to him, “ _Fine! Leave me. Jerk._ ”

“I’m not leaving yet,” he said with a softer voice and he scooped his blazer off the floor as he left the room to find his bag in the kitchen. He rifled through it for his cell phone, and he scrolled through his contacts to _‘L’_ and called the name he was looking for.

“ _What_?” Lucas answered the phone, his voice annoyed.

“ _Hey_ ,” he said awkwardly when Lucas picked up, “I’m at Ten’s place, but he needs you. Not me…” Johnny answered then paused, “Can you get here?”

There was a moment of silence before Lucas answered again.

“Yeah, I’ll be there in fifteen,” he said, his voice lighter.

“ _Okay, cool_ ,” Johnny sighed, “ _Thanks, man_ ,” the line dropped and Johnny returned to Ten’s room, the smell of omega in heat nearly suffocating him now, and he poked his head in and saw Ten with his face pressed into his pillow but his hand down his boxers.

“Lucas is on his way,” Johnny informed.

“ _Okay_ ,” Ten said, his voice stressed.

“I’m sorry, Ten,” Johnny said sincerely, as he back into the hallway, giving the omega his privacy, and doing the buttons on his shirt again, “I have a lot going on right now, and I’m sorry I couldn’t do what I said I would.”

“ _It’s fine, I just hate you_ ,” Ten said cattily, but Johnny figured he didn’t actually mean it, “You can’t take the pizza with you. You owe me that pizza— and a second pizza later this week for being a _dick_.”

“ _That’s fair_ ,” Johnny laughed and sat on the floor outside Ten’s bedroom door. He tried not to listen to the sounds, the bed squeaking, the soft gasps and little whines, the smell getting headier by the moment.

“ _It’s because you like someone, isn’t it_?” Ten asked after the noises quieted. Johnny’s heart slammed against his chest at the question. Did Ten know? How did he find out? Was Johnny being too careless during class?

Ten continued, “Jaehyun told me you had someone back in America…”

“... _Yeah_ ,” Johnny answered; it was a lie, but he was fully intent on letting Ten believe it.

“ _Yeah…_ ” Ten whimpered, “…I had a feeling you were into girls anyway,” the omega in the other room said and Johnny frowned to himself, wanting to correct Ten, but he knew he’d have to answer so many questions if he did, so he didn’t, “Thanks for calling my runner up for me,” Ten said, and Johnny snorted.

“Do _not_ tell him that,” he warned, “If you want two alphas to turn you down in the span of one day, I suggest you leave that out.”

“ _Noted_ ,” his voice dripped icily. Johnny stood from his spot in the hallway when Lucas texted him that he was around the corner.

“Lucas is here. I’ll see you on Monday,” Johnny murmured awkwardly. Ten didn’t answer him and Johnny slipped on his blazer again, stuffing his tie into his bag as he picked it up from the floor of the kitchen, before he made his way to the front door. Lucas was bounding up the sidewalk just as Johnny opened the door.

Lucas had on a pair of loose joggers and a grey hoodie. His chest was puffing, and his hair was windswept like he had run there. Johnny was thankful the younger could look him in the eyes now.

“What happened?” Lucas asked him. Johnny tucked his hands into his blazer pockets and looked down for a second.

“I’m… I couldn’t do it,” Johnny admitted, “It just felt wrong. It wasn’t fair to him, or me, or you…” he said, “he’s in his room and there’s, like, half a pizza on the kitchen counter. His international family is out,” Johnny informed as he stepped down from the doorway, and left it open for Lucas to enter. As Johnny brushed passed, the younger put a hand on his shoulder.

“Hey, Hyung… thanks,” he murmured sincerely, “and… good job on your test today. I’m happy you’re going to be able to play with us next weekend. And I’m sorry I’ve been being such a dick to you this week,” he said and Johnny smiled, his heart feeling better. He held his hand up for a high five and Lucas happily raised his and clapped their hands together. Johnny pulled him in for a one-armed hug, and it felt good to be back on good graces with his teammate, even though he was probably never going to hear the end of this from Ten.

“Go get him,” Johnny said, “I know how much you like him.”

“Oh, _so much_ ,” Lucas sighed dreamily and his head dropped to the side dopily, his wide grin hiding nothing, “I’d literally follow him into Hell if he wanted me there with him.”

Johnny chuckled happily and threw Lucas a peace sign as he turned to walk out of the little garden. He didn’t turn around when he heard Lucas yell ‘ _Chittaphon!_ ’ at the top of his lungs as the front door slammed closed.

Johnny rode the bus home, his brain quieter, and his heart lighter. He looked out the window at the passing shops and signs and wondered what Taeyong was doing now. If he was still at the school grading papers, or if he was in the car on his way home, munching on a homemade snack. When he got home, he told his grandma he wasn’t sleeping over at a friend’s house after all, but he did ask if he could invite Jaehyun over. He knew his friend would want to hear the whole story before Ten told Yuta, and Yuta told Sicheng, and so on down the chain.

Jaehyun was surprised to hear the story of Johnny bailing on Ten, and said he would be happy to come over and hang out. Johnny felt at ease once more, happy with his decisions when the two of them were sitting on Johnny’s bed playing Overwatch early into Saturday morning.

~

Johnny stepped down from his attic room Monday morning feeling much better than he did last week, but his grandmother seemed quiet when he entered the kitchen to find her cooking up egg and rice omelettes for breakfast. Johnny wandered over to her and asked her what was wrong. His grandma sighed and set down her spatula.

“Your mother has been calling me and your aunt asking for you,” she reminded him, and Johnny’s expression dropped into a cold one when she said that.

“She’s been leaving me voicemails multiple times a day too,” he murmured.

“I know it’s hard to talk to her, Youngho-ah,” she sighed, “but it’s time you spoke with her, if anything, just to pacify her. She’s worried about you, and your poor auntie and grandma can’t keep making excuses for you,” she said. He could see that it was hard for her to speak like this about her own daughter, to her grandson.

‘Making excuses’, and ‘pacify’; all things done for misbehaving children. Johnny sighed, and the rice cooker beeped, signally it was finished.

“Okay,” he conceded, “I’ll call her after school,” he grumbled as he turned away to leave the kitchen to go get his school bag from upstairs.

“That will be too late for her,” she reminded him, just as he stepped foot on the first stair, “I think you should text her now, and let her know you’ll call her tomorrow morning,” she said, “She just wants to know you’re okay.”

Johnny lingered at the bottom of the stairs, his hand on the doorframe and a cloud forming over his thoughts.

“Breakfast is ready,” his grandma broke the silence softly, “Go change and come back and eat before you go to school.”

~

Johnny stopped at his locker before going into homeroom to grab a couple of his textbooks needed for morning classes. He smelt the familiar calming scent of his favorite teacher, and Johnny turned his head in time to see Taeyong walking down the hall with another faculty member. He sucked in a surprised breath as he saw him this morning.

His long legs in a skinny black pant, a crisp black blazer with two buttons that made his waist look deliciously thin and his shoulders broad and confident. He had on a simple white V-neck shirt underneath, and a chunky silver necklace with jade, a feather, and an eagle, but the outfit wasn’t the first thing that caught his eye.

Mr. Lee had changed his dark hair to _blonde_ , and it made Johnny’s knees threaten to buckle.

He have never before thought about whether he preferred brunettes, or blondes, or raven hair, but seeing Taeyong with golden locks made a preference form in his mind. It suited him, and made his features even more striking.

Although his teacher was walking with another faculty member, Taeyong caught his eye, and smiled shyly, a quick gesture that didn’t seem out of place in the slightly busy hallway. Johnny’s heart began to race as Taeyong’s eyes crinkled attractively, and he reached a hand up to brush his bangs out of his eyes. Johnny could see his shoulders pinch up a little bit, and he could tell just by that that his teacher was just a bit sheepish of his new look.

The student managed to smile and bow respectfully to the two teachers as they passed, trying not to call too much attention to it, but the cloud of Taeyong’s scent swept past him and his ears rang with the remnants of their last conversation.

‘ _You’ve worked very hard, Johnny. I’m proud of you._ ’

Johnny needed to stop staring before anyone noticed him, and he turned to finish gathering his books from his locker, calming his heart and unscrambling his thoughts.

As he made his way to class with a newfound outlook, he spotted quite the couple lounging against the wall outside his classroom. Lucas was leaning his back against the wall, his hands in his blazer pockets, and Ten was standing between the alpha’s long legs. There was a rule about excessive PDA on campus, but Ten’s hand was resting innocently on Lucas’ chest and the taller boy had a lazy, effortless smile on his face as he gazed down at the omega who was keeping all his attention. Johnny got within earshot and heard Lucas laugh ridiculously at something Ten said. It was all too easy to imagine him and Taeyong in a similar position but he tried desperately to shove that thought into the back of his mind.

‘ _Good for them_ ,’ Johnny thought, and cleared his throat.

“ _Well, well, well_ ,” Ten sang loftily as he noticed Johnny, and smiled playfully, “if it isn’t the jerk who owes me a pizza,” he teased.

“I _do_ owe you a pizza, that was a promise I made,” Johnny shrugged, “You two look quite happy,” he noted. Lucas put a hand on Ten’s waist lightly.

“Don’t bully Johnny-hyung too much, Ten,” Lucas snickered, “I did enough of that last week,” Lucas said and Ten snorted, folding his arms dramatically.

“I’ll stop bullying him when I think he’s earned it,” Ten muttered but Johnny could see by the way his eyes twinkled that he only half meant it; he had been forgiven at some point over the weekend. The bell rang and Lucas planted a big kiss to the back of Ten’s neck.

“See you at break,” he promised tugging Ten’s hand until the very last moment he had to let go. Ten turned to Johnny after watching Lucas walk away for a moment.

“Thanks for what you did,” Ten said honestly, and Johnny wasn't expecting that at all, he looked down at Ten with wide eyes, “I shouldn’t take Lucas for granted. He’s good to me.”

“Yeah, you’re welcome,” Johnny said, his own heart tightening over the agonizing reality that there was no way for Johnny to take Taeyong for granted; every moment he got with the older man was precious to him, “He’s absolutely smitten over you,” Johnny noted. Ten smiled brightly.

“Yeah, you’re right,” the silver haired boy said, and brushed passed Johnny to enter their classroom, his scent back to normal.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I accidentally deleted a chapter @_@   
> But I promptly fixed it, sorry for the weirdness.  
> -Copper


	6. Holidays

At the first game of the season, Johnny’s team killed it.

In the locker room beforehand, they got dressed into their jerseys, shorts, and shoes, and the room was buzzing with excitement. Stomachs were twisting with nerves, Mark and Lucas were shouting chants that the others followed, stomping their feet and banging fists against metal lockers in rhythm. Johnny’s fingers couldn’t stop clenching, and his toes even curled in his sneakers with the anticipation of their first home game.

There was muffled buzzing of a full gymnasium behind the lockers, and before they went out, their coach pep-talked them. Johnny barely heard the speech, the roaring from the gym picked up, and they knew their opponents had just entered the stadium.

They all put their hands in, Johnny’s shoulders brushing with Jaehyun’s and Haechan’s.

“Alright team! _Let’s get it_!” their coach finished and all of them howled together.

“ _Let’s get it_!!” they boomed. Lucas was first, he thrust open the doors of the gym, and the sounds amplified. The bleachers exploded as their home team came running out, and Johnny’s eyes scanned for their friends. He found his grandmother and aunt near the edge of the bleachers, and he waved to them with a proud smile. Jaehyun touched his shoulder and pointed, and Johnny’s eyes found Ten, Sicheng, Doyoung, and Yuta sitting together. Two rows below them, with a group of other teachers, Johnny found Taeyong and his smile split even bigger. His heart, which was pounding with excitement, throbbed again when he saw his blond teacher.

Mr. Lee stood up when their team entered the gym, and Johnny’s eyes shone when Taeyong put his fingers to his lips and whistled for them, his sound cutting clear over the rest. Johnny gained a new bounce in his step.

The five starters entered the court, Johnny being the center, and he locked eyes with their opposing team’s center too. The referee came in with the basketball in his hands and a whistle around his neck.

“Alright boys, a nice clean game. May the best team win,” he said and held out the ball for the first toss. Johnny and their other team captain didn’t break eye contact, but they both nodded. The sounds all around them stopped when the ball flew up into the air, then the ref’s sharp whistle brought it all back with force.

Johnny leapt into the air to knock the ball into their court. Lucas fell back and took control of the ball, and within the first twenty seconds, their team had scored and set the tone for the whole game.

The stadium erupted with cheers, stomping feet, and applause.

There’s something that happens psychologically between two teams when one team scores in the first minute of the game. It was over before it even had the time to begin.

By the end of the game, Seoul International won 48 to 5. It was a massacre, and Johnny scored nine of those points. Three stunning shoots and one absolutely outrageous dunk that he and Lucas had spent hours practicing and perfecting the week beforehand. It made the whole stadium shriek and howl with excitement.

Johnny’s eyes flitted to the bleachers as often as he could spare. For every shot, his classmates and family were on their feet, and so was his teacher.

 

~

 

The following Saturday morning, Johnny steeled himself to do the one thing he very much didn’t want to do but had promised his grandmother he would.

He called his mom.

Before he did that though, he made a quick call to his father, maybe hoping to get a pep talk, a wise word, or anything. Honestly, he was procrastinating, and if he was going to call one parent, he might as well call both.

His conversation with his father was not what he hoped for.

“Hey, Dad…” Johnny greeted when his father answered the phone, “how are you?” he asked conversationally.

“Good. Busy,” he answered, not unpredictably, “I’m going in for a meeting with a client in a few minutes before I head home, but I’ve been meaning to ask you what bank you’re at and what your account and routing numbers are. I have some money to give you.”

“What? Dad, no that’s not necessary,” Johnny reasoned, “Grandma and I are doing just fine, you don’t have to give me money.”

“Nonsense. Thanksgiving and Christmas are coming up, and I want you to book your flight home for the holidays to meet Julia. On your own time of course. I’m sure you’re busy with school.” he said, and Johnny stopped.

There were many things about that sentence that baffled him. One: who the hell was Julia? Two: did his father just refer to his house in Chicago as ‘home’? Johnny hadn’t been to his father’s house in over three years, and his dad hadn’t made a big deal about Christmas since he was, like, seven and learning to ride his first bike.

“Um, I-I don’t know what I’m doing for Christmas. I’m probably staying in Seoul.”

“ _No_ ,” his dad scoffed in that tone that said ‘ _stop kidding me, kid_ ’, “You have to come home for the holidays. You have to meet Julia, and see my new place, and new office.”

“Yeah, and also, who’s Julia?” Johnny asked incredulously.

“My fiancé,” his dad said and Johnny nearly dropped his phone.

“Um. What?” he asked flatly. Johnny’s dad didn’t… _date_. Ever since his mother started drinking, his dad had been married to his work. This news was coming out of left field.

“Well, she’s not my fiancé, yet. I’m popping the question over New Years when we fly out to San Diego for a conference.”

“Wow, um. That’s… great…” Johnny couldn’t remember how to talk for a moment, “How— how long have you known Julia?” Johnny asked, trying to be happy about this very, _very_ new information.

“Oh, she’s been my secretary for a little over a year now,” he answered cheerily. Johnny’s head reeled.

“Wow, okay. I’m gonna go. It was real great catching up, Dad, but you said you have a meeting to go to?” he offered weakly, hoping to end this terrible conversation as quickly as possible.

“Yeah, it should be over in about an hour. Send me your bank info, and I’ll wire you some money,” he said, “When you come home for Christmas, you can meet Julia, and see my new place, _and_ you can get a tour of your new workplace for the summer before you start law-school.”

And _that_ was the end of that conversation.

“ _Yep_. Okie-dokie. Talk to you later, Dad.” Johnny said flatly and didn’t even wait for his response before he ended the call.

He sat there for a few minutes with his brain spinning inside his skull, berating himself for the terrible choice he made by calling his dad before calling his mom. He didn’t even get to ask him if he’d heard from his mother recently, but seeing as he has a new woman in his life, Johnny figured probably not. He was also a little let down by how his father didn’t ask about him or his schooling at all.

He looked at the clock, it was about ten in the morning for him, so it was nearing five at night for his mother in the U.S. and he knew the later he waited to call, the less sober she was likely to be. Johnny felt his hands start to sweat and his stomach was twisting. He didn’t want to do this _at all_.

As the phone rang again and again, Johnny’s nerves tightened. He wondered if it was going to go to voicemail and thus start a terrible game of phone-tag with his mother, but before that happened and he was forced to leave an awkward, half-hearted voicemail, she picked up the phone.

“John-ah!” her voice cheered, “How are you?” she asked. Her voice sounded gravely, and Johnny wasn’t sure if it was the reception or if she had been drinking, but he would be able to tell soon enough.

“I’m good,” Johnny answered, “I won my first basketball game with my team last night,” he shared, knowing she’d love that. She did, she gushed proudly.

“Ohhhh, my son! I’m sure you were just the star of the _whole_ match,” she purred and Johnny was willing to bet she had indeed had a drink so far just by the way her words seemed lengthened, “How is school? How is your friend, Jaehoon?” she stumbled, and that’s when Johnny knew for sure that she had been drinking. She would have remembered Jaehyun’s name, because they had been friends since they were kids and Johnny had spoken about him numerous times right before leaving America.

“…Jae _hyun_?” Johnny corrected, a little annoyed, “He’s fine. School is great. I really love Korea,” Johnny answered quickly and pointedly, “Dad wants me to come home for Christmas, but I don’t think I want to.”

“You should! I miss my boy and I really want to see you both,” she whined. Johnny hated that tone, the one she adopted when she got drunk and started turning words around to make life her pity party, “What are you doing for Thanksgiving?”

“Probably going to Auntie’s house with Grandma,” he answered, “Did you know Dad is getting engaged?” he asked. The line went quiet for a moment.

“He what?” she asked.

“Her name is Julia, apparently,” Johnny said conversationally, but he knew it would strike a cord in her, “Dad seems really smitten. He wants me to go to his place for Christmas and meet her.”

“You _what_?” she growled, her voice dropping.

“I already said I don’t want to go. In fact, I’m not going. I don’t want to go back to America at all.”

She went quiet again and Johnny didn’t speak either. He waited for almost ten seconds in silence, not wanting to speak, and either waiting for her to start talking or to hang up the phone.

“What about college?” she asked, her voice quieter, and Johnny realized she wasn’t _absolutely_ drunk then, because she had regained some semblance of her emotions and was able to divert the conversation to other things instead of raging and screaming about her ex-husband. Her tone came back slightly more collected.

“What _about_ college?” Johnny mimicked with venom, on the verge of becoming pissed, knowing exactly where this was heading.

“Are you going to apply to medical school in Korea?” she asked and Johnny’s annoyance shot up from ten to sixty.

“ _No_ , I haven’t even been _thinking_ about college, Mom,” he spat, “In fact, I’m probably going to take a year off after high school to work, and then— _I dunno_ , go to a performing arts school or something like that, seeing as I’m already _behind_ , because you couldn’t keep me in one school for longer than three months,” he hissed, “I’m going to tell you again, Mom. I don’t want to be a doctor, and I don’t want to be a lawyer either.”

“You need a good job. You need to make enough to take care of your grandma and mother when the time comes.”

“No, I need to be happy,” Johnny countered, “And you know what? I’m plenty happy here in Korea without you _or_ Dad. Why don’t you try and take care of _yourself_ ,” he spat. He knew it was mean, but he felt she deserved to hear it. He wished his father could hear him say it too, “Please stop calling me. I’m busy with school, and I can’t afford to get phone calls from you at three and five in the morning. I got in trouble with my teacher when my phone went off in class, because _you_ called me,” he growled, “Now, if you excuse me, I have homework to do. Have a nice weekend. Hope you can remember this conversation tomorrow,” he snapped, then ended the call.

He was expecting a call-back, or a text beck telling him how he should be nicer to his only mother, instead, he got a text from his father about twenty minutes later asking him why he told his ex-wife about his soon-to-be engagement to his secretary.

‘ _Consider it payback for you giving her my number in the first place. Now she’s both of our problems_.’ He texted back cruelly, feeling extra spiteful over his parents and their terrible behavior and choices.

He felt like shit the rest of the day over it.

 

~

 

Johnny was absolutely perplexed the next day when his father called him back and still insisted on sending him money.

“I’m not going to America for the holidays, Dad. I don’t want to have a run-in with Mom. Maybe I’ll come for a visit during the summer, but I want to stay in Korea,” he explained rationally, with a calm voice, “I have good friends here, and Grandma needs me around the house.”

“You need to be around family for Christmas.”

“I’m around family _right now_ ,” Johnny countered and looked up from the lunch table to see his grandmother smiling at him with pride from the other end of the kitchen.

“Alright, fine. Stay in Seoul for the holidays. But when you come back to visit, I’m going to change your mind about Chicago. When you see my office, and what will one day be _your_ office, I’ll have you convinced,” he said loftily, and Johnny rolled his eyes, something he knows he’d get slapped for if he did it in front of his father, “I’ll still send you money. You can pay back your grandmother for housing you, and you can buy some Christmas gifts. Be good,” he said.

“Alright. Thanks, Dad,” Johnny sighed, “Do you want me to tell you my bank info over the phone?” he asked.

“Yes, that would be excellent,” he answered. Johnny opened his banking app on his phone and found the correct information to give his father, and after they were done exchanging information, his father ended the call. Johnny tossed his phone onto the dining room table and groaned.

“Am I terrible for not wanting to be around my mom or dad for the holidays?” he asked out loud, hoping his grandma would answer rhetorically.

“Hmm,” she hummed as she put a lid on her wok and turned away from the stove, “In your case, no. Both of your parents are complicated people. I’m so proud of you for becoming so well adjusted, despite your parent’s troubles, and—” she added as she came around the back of Johnny’s chair and hugged her grandson from behind, “—the way you told him you were around family right now. _Oooh_ , I would have loved to have seen his face when you said that.”

Johnny felt better after that, and he raised his arms to wrap them around hers gratefully. Before she pulled away, she ruffled his hair and mentioned that it was time for him to get a haircut.

His phone pinged with a text from his dad, telling him he had dropped the money into his account. Johnny checked his banking app on his phone and had to blink at the number a few times, making sure he was getting the zeros right.

“You know, my dad might be terrible at saying he loves me, but I think this is proof enough,” he said and showed his grandma the phone. She balked at it just like Johnny did.

“His business must be doing well,” she said after she composed herself, “What are you going to do with all that?”

“Give half to you, buy some Christmas presents, put some in savings and sit on it,” he answered instantly, closing the app on his phone and setting his phone aside casually.

“You need to remember to give your teacher a Christmas gift too,” his grandma reminded him, “He took time out of his lunches to tutor you. He deserves a nice gift,” she said grandmotherly and Johnny’s mind lit up.

“That’s a _great_ idea,” he murmured, his mind racing with gift ideas already.

 

~

 

This Thanksgiving was one of Johnny’s most treasured holidays, and he’ll never forget it. The weekend before, Jaehyun’s mother invited Johnny, his grandma, and his aunt to his parent’s place for a Korean Thanksgiving meal.

Johnny and his Aunt had prepared a turkey the night before and cooked it in the morning before heading over to Jaehyun’s parent’s place. The car smelled heavenly as they drove through the neighborhoods.

Jaehyun answered the door in jeans and a red flannel with the sleeves rolled up, and he welcomed the small family of three into his house. Jaehyun’s mother pulled Johnny into the kitchen so he could set down the heavy, covered turkey dish in his hands. As soon as his hands were free, she was hugging him like he was her own son. Jaehyun’s mother cooed when she let go, then in turn hugged his grandma and aunt. The six of them sat at the Jungs’ dining room table and went around saying what they were thankful for, and ate a splendid, mish-mashed meal of Korean traditional foods, and American traditional foods.

A Turkey, pan fried sides, mashed potatoes, Korean savory pancakes, Johnny’s homemade stuffing, and starch noodles fried with beef and vegetables.

He leaned over to Jaehyun after the meal and thanked him quietly for the invite, knowing it was probably his idea, and Jaehyun smiled at him, his cheeks dimpling.

“We’re always happy to have you and your family over,” he said and took his fist and bumped Johnny’s thigh affectionately. Johnny grinned and shouldered him softly in response.

 

~

 

_John Seo:_

_Dear Mr. Lee,_

_I’d like to get you a Christmas gift for being so helpful to me this year with my grades. All I’d like to know is: What is your favorite color?_

_-Johnny_

 

He wondered if this was crossing any lines. He knew that Taeyong’s work email should strictly be used for school related things, but this was a little important.

Actually, no. Johnny knew this email was completely self-indulgent.

He got an email back the next morning telling Johnny that he liked black and red, but not to spend his money on him. Johnny chose to ignore that.

He went out before Christmas break and bought Taeyong a silver and black baking set which included three different sizes of black mixing bowls, a whisk, a silicone spatula, and a wooden spoon with a black handle. He wrapped the gifts in red and silver giftwrap, and it sat on the edge of his desk patiently until the Friday before winter break.

Johnny waited the whole week for the last day of school before winter break. It was also civvies day, and he was excited to give out his gifts and wear his own clothes to school. Thursday night, after school, Johnny texted his grandma telling her not to wait for him, because he was going to get a haircut. The undercut was over, and his hair was becoming almost long enough to put into a top knot.

He kept it dark but had them trim it up and deep condition it. The woman who cut his hair said multiple times how lucky he was to have such a thick head of hair to work with.

It was cold outside this time of year, so Johnny wore warm clothes to school the next day. He wore a dark green turtleneck under a grey hoodie, cuffed plaid slacks that were deceptively warm, as well as long socks and black leather shoes. His hair felt fresh again, and he liked how natural and fluffy it looked after the deep conditioner at the hair salon. He tucked his gifts into his bag and carried his teacher’s special gift in his arms. He got all his friends fuzzy socks with cute patterns on them, trying to stay away from the Christmas theme so they could wear them all winter long.

Jaehyun eyed the gift box with a big smile as Johnny walked into the classroom. Johnny’s nose tickled at the smell of Mr. Lee.

“Who’s that for?” he asked curiously, and Johnny smiled to himself, pleased with his gift.

“It’s for Mr. Lee,” he said quietly, “My grandma thought it would be a good idea to get him a gift because he helped tutor me.”

When his teacher came in, Johnny was happy to see he wasn’t the only person who had gone ahead and gotten their teacher a gift, but Johnny’s was the only one that wasn’t edible. Everyone else had brought him cookies, chocolates, or peppermint bark, but Johnny’s giftbox was definitely separate from the rest of the cellophane-wrapped sweets.

Taeyong had also purchased a little gift for each student in his class; everyone got a holiday pencil. Cheep, but still cute. Johnny’s was red and had little gold stars all over it.

When Taeyong gave it to him, he complimented Johnny on his new haircut, saying it looked nice and made him look older and it made Johnny feel like he was floating on a cloud all day.

In the classroom, it was warm, and Johnny took off his grey hoodie and left it hanging over the back of his chair. After basketball practice, his teammates made plans to go out and get noodles together when school got out. Johnny was anxious for the bell to ring at the end of the day, because it meant he wouldn’t see Taeyong for a while, but that meant he also wouldn’t have to be at school for two weeks.

The bell rang at the very end of the day, and Johnny started to collect his things as Mark and Lucas came up to his desk at the end of their Korean lesson.

“Ready for a two-week vacation?”

“So ready,” he answered and slung his bag over his shoulder and lead the other two to the front of the class. Johnny gave Mr. Lee a friendly wave and smile, “Have a good Christmas, Mr. Lee,” he said, and Taeyong smiled back. Johnny saw that he looked a little tired, but he figured his teacher could catch up on sleep over the break.

“You boys have a good Christmas as well,” he greeted back, “And be safe going home,” he added.

“We will,” Johnny answered and tugged himself away, his heart feeling sore over all the missing he was going to be doing this winter break. They met up with Jaehyun, Haechan, and the rest of the team in the halls as they made their way out of the school. They walked off campus and through the frigid December evening, and Johnny put his hands over his arms, feeling the chill.

“Did you forget a jacket today?” Haechan remarked, and Johnny stopped and realized that, no, he hadn’t.

“Oh,” he murmured, “I think I left it in the classroom,” he said.

“Do you wanna… run back for it?” Jaehyun asked. Johnny hesitated for just a second, they were almost a block away from the school by now.

“Nah,” he said, turning back to his friends, “We’re about to go get hot noodles anyway. The restaurant will be warm. Besides, I don’t even know if Mr. Lee is still in the class or not,” he reasoned, “I can get it after the break,” he decided, and Jaehyun pulled Johnny against his side and wrapped his hands around Johnny’s forearm to keep him warm as the group walked through the cold streets of the city.

 

~

 

The days leading up to Christmas flew by so quick, Johnny felt like he woke up on Christmas Eve a couple hours after school got out, even though he had been on winter break for five days already.

He did his Christmas shopping with Jaehyun and Ten earlier in the week so he could find gifts for his grandma, aunt, and his two cousins who were coming back home for the holidays. He and his grandma decorated their house with silver and red tinsel, holly, and wreaths on the doors. His grandma was playing Christmas music nonstop as she cooked and cooked. There were fresh cookies every day. He was feeling the Christmas spirit, happy to have a respite from his two problematic parents and enjoy a low-key Christmas with his extended family.

His grandma even offered to put rum in the eggnog for just the family on Christmas Eve, saying cheekily: “I won’t tell if you don’t.”

The spirit of the holidays was in the air, and snow had started to fall in the city, putting Johnny in the winter mood. Fuzzy slippers, cozy socks, ugly Christmas sweaters. On Christmas Eve, they had plans to spend the day with their family, and sleep over at their aunt’s place that night. They were going to go to Johnny’s aunt’s place around noon and have dinner, and then open gifts Christmas morning. Johnny was excited to relax and watch a Christmas movie, drink spiked eggnog, and catch up with his cousins whom he hadn’t seen in years.

The snow was so pretty, and Johnny insisted on driving him and his grandma. He was wearing a dark green Christmas sweater that matched his grandma’s and dark blue jeans with boots. He also had on a long brown overcoat for the snow. Their overnight bags were in the trunk.

His grandma had the pitcher of eggnog at her feet and a tin of homemade cookies in her hands as they drove slowly through the snowy streets.

“On our way home tomorrow night, we should take the long way and look at Christmas lights,” Johnny suggested, and his grandma agreed happily. They arrived at Johnny’s aunt’s house and pulled up into the driveway. Johnny helped his grandma out of the car and took the pitcher of eggnog in for her. They left their bags in the car for the time being.

Johnny offered his arm out to his grandma so they could walk up to the front door arm in arm, and also so he could steady her if she slipped on the ice. She was laughing a little as they got to the front door and knocked.

Johnny’s cousin, Joshua, ripped open the door and smiled brightly, but awkwardly. His hair looked a bit frazzled, and his eyes were wide with concern and fear.

“Hi, Grandma! Hey, Johnny!” he called and Johnny smiled, “You’re gonna want to _go_ ,” he added, and Johnny’s face fell in confusion at the strange warning tone in his voice.

“Um…” Johnny started, but then he heard it, clear as day.

“John-ah! My John-ah is here?” called the familiar voice, and Johnny’s cheery attitude dropped instantly. Joshua stepped out of the way, and Johnny’s mother came around the corner.

“Yeah… Auntie Minyoung just showed up this morning… isn’t it a surprise?” Joshua asked, his voice betraying how unexcited he was.

Johnny’s grandma startled too. His mom was _there_ , wearing a black turtleneck, leggings, a zebra print scarf, and a smile on her aged face. Her makeup was done, but it was cakey and didn’t cover her wrinkles very well. In her hand was a stemless tumbler that was half-full of red liquid. Johnny saw his aunt come around the corner into the foyer, and she stared at them and held her hands out in a bewildered shrug, her eyes bugging out of her head like she was saying ‘ _I-couldn’t-stop-her-and-believe-me-I-tried_ ’.

“Yeah, my sister rolled in about twenty minutes before you guys did… without calling any of us,” she said.

“Where is your Christmas spirit? I’m here now, and mom and John-ah are here now, and it’s going to be an amazing Christmas here, in _Seoul_ ,” Johnny’s mom cheered, and Johnny watched with blatant annoyance and disgust as she tossed back her wine glass and finished off what was in it. Johnny’s upper lip curled, and his anger rose.

His grandmother slowly let go of his arm and turned to her grandson.

“Johnny?” she asked quietly. Johnny held the heavy pitcher of eggnog out to Joshua who took it wordlessly. Johnny reached into his coat pocket for the car keys and unlocked the car remotely before he put the key in his grandma’s hands.

“I can’t do this,” Johnny said definitively, “I’m going to Jaehyun’s. Lock the car door after I get my bag.”

Johnny turned on his heel and stalked back out into the snow to get his backpack from the car. He didn’t even get to step foot into his aunt’s warm house, he just turned and walked back into the frozen December air. He heard his mother’s shrill voice calling after him, ordering him to wait.

Johnny ripped open the trunk of the car and grabbed his backpack, which had been purged of all his school stuff and now had pajamas and spare clothes in it. He knew his wallet and phone was in in there too, and he figured he’d walk to a café and call Jaehyun from there.

He heard his mother’s feet crunching over snow as she came out to catch him, and Johnny whipped around to face her.

“Come back inside! It’s Christmas!” she called.

“ _No_!” Johnny barked, his voice deep and angry, “You always do this! You show up and ruin everything! It’s not even noon and you’re already drinking! I’m not going to sit through another Christmas and watch you get plastered, and embarrass me and yourself, and then have you yell at me because I didn’t pay attention to you! _This_ is why I don’t pay attention to you!” Johnny couldn’t believe he was standing in the snow yelling at his own mother outside of a neighborhood on Christmas eve. The neighbors were going to notice if they kept this up, so Johnny turned to start walking away again.

He heard her crunch through the snow, and he felt her hand slam down onto his shoulder, her acrylic nails clawing at his coat. He was forcefully pulled around, and Johnny felt his eyes light up a bright scarlet as he was forced to stare back down at his mother.

“How can you say _I_ ruin holidays when _you’re_ the one walking out!? How can you hurt your mother’s feelings like this!?” she shrieked and Johnny turned and pried her hand off of him. When he turned to look at his mom again, he felt his heart break. She was hardly the mother he used to know; life and her own choices had warped her.

“Classic. Making _everything_ about you,” he snarled, “you couldn’t take a hint when I told you I didn’t want to come to America for the holidays. I didn’t want to see you _or_ dad. You walked in without an invitation and just _expected_ everyone to be okay with it, because Minyoung’s the star, and _everyone_ should pity her and welcome her back. I can’t speak for the rest of them, but _I_ didn’t want you here. So, _yes_. You’ve ruined _another_ holiday! _Thanks_ ,” he bellowed, and now he knew it had gone too far because he could see his mother start to cry. He wasn’t sure if they were real tears or fake tears, which he knew she could pull out of her sleeve, but Johnny wasn’t going to take it today. He turned around again and walked away. Before he could make it too far, he turned his head over his shoulder and called back, “Oh, yeah. Do yourself a favor, and _don’t_ drink the eggnog we brought; It’s _not_ for you,” he shouted. He saw the rest of his family standing in the open doorway of his aunt’s house watching their altercation silently, and Johnny just turned around and started walking again, this time, not looking back.

He was surprised and thankful his mother didn’t come clawing after him. He walked for a while, basically stomping through the blocks, getting out of people’s way as they walked opposite him on the sidewalk. He was grinding his teeth together and glaring at the grey concrete, feeling his stomach twist with all sorts of negative emotions that shouldn’t be here on the night before Christmas.

He walked for so long he felt his ears, which were uncovered, start to sting from being out in the cold. He hadn’t brought a hat or anything.

He ducked into a café after walking for about forty minutes and cooling off. He sat alone at a booth and took his phone out of his backpack. He had a slew of texts from his mom, and one from his grandma saying he should take his time and that she’d talk to his mother.

Johnny scrolled through his phone contacts to call Jaehyun, but in his annoyance, he over-scrolled and his phone stopped and his eyes landed on his teacher’s email address.

Johnny stared at the email for a few long beats. He wanted to talk to Mr. Lee, more than anyone else. He didn’t want to bother Jaehyun, but he wondered if he would be bothering Taeyong by emailing him too. What if he was with his family and wasn’t about to be disturbed on his winter break?

Johnny’s shoulders dropped, and he sighed heavily. He watched something get placed on the table in front of him, and he looked up to see a waitress standing at the end of his empty table.

She had set a tall, steamy mug of something in front of him. There were red and green sugar crystals on top of the foam. He looked back up at her with confusion.

“Sorry… I didn’t order anything,” he murmured.

“I know, but you look like you need this,” she stood there for a moment before she pushed the drink forward a few inches and bowed, “Merry Christmas Eve,” she added before she turned and walked away. Johnny pulled the warm drink closer to him. It smelled like rich coffee, and his stomach growled. He should have been eating cookies at his aunt’s place right now. He took a sip and tasted the butterscotch, and it made him feel a little better. His shoulders, which were tight, relaxed a little as he sipped the warm beverage.

He looked back at his phone again, threw caution into the wind, and pressed Lee Taeyong’s email.

_John Seo:_

_Hey Mr. Lee,_

_My mother showed up at my aunt’s house uninvited for Christmas, and she ruined the holiday for me. I stormed out of the house angrily and went to a café. I don’t really know what I’m going to do from here. I might message Jung Jaehyun but I don’t really want to disturb his family. I’m sure you’re with family too, though. I don’t really know why I’m writing to you… Sorry about this. Hope you have a good Christmas._

_-Johnny_

 

He sent the email with a big sigh and sat back against the booth seat. He picked up his sweet coffee drink again and huffed as he cursed his mother in his head and sipped more of the drink. His ears were still cold, but the ceramic mug helped warm his cold fingers. He pushed the drink away from him and bent forward over the table and folded his arm to lay his head on them.

This wasn’t how this day was supposed to go.

He was planning on finishing this drink and then calling Jaehyun. His phone vibrated, and he wondered if it was his mom, begging him to comeback. Instead it was an email notification from an address he didn’t recognize, but when he read the first line of the email his heart leapt.

It was Mr. Lee, responding from a personal email account.

_Lee Taeyong:_

_Johnny, It’s Mr. Lee._

_I’m emailing you from my private email because I’m in Seoul right now, and a conversation like this shouldn’t be held over my work email. Where are you?_

_\- LTY_

Johnny was stunned, and he immediately checked his phone location for the exact address and sent it to his teacher. He was surprised to get a response at all. He mostly just messaged his teacher for his own comfort in that moment, he wasn’t expecting Taeyong to actually answer.

When Taeyong responded again, telling Johnny he was ten minutes away, Johnny was blown away. He had no idea what to expect, but this was the best-case scenario. Was his teacher going to come into the café to have coffee with him? Was he going to drive him back to his aunt’s place?

Johnny finished his drink and walked up to the front to pay for it. The girl who brought him his drink helped him at the counter.

“You look livelier. Did your mate answer you back?” she asked forwardly, and Johnny faltered. It was an old-fashioned title, but it was easiest to use when you weren’t sure if someone had a boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife. Johnny smiled sheepishly.

“He’s not my mate, but… yeah,” he answered, but his mind ran the word over and over again like a skipping CD. _Mate, mate, mate_ … God, did he wish Lee Taeyong could one day be his mate.

Before he took out his debit card, he spied the pastries and cakes in the well-lit display and ordered two slices of their dark chocolate cake to go. She prepared them cutely, side by side, in a little white cardboard box and delivered it to him.

“The chocolate cake always makes me feel better too,” she said conversationally as she ran his card, “I hope your holiday picks back up. It’s a shame to be alone on Christmas,” she said.

“I think it’ll be okay in the end. Whatever happens, happens,” he said with a smile, “I hope your holiday has less drama than mine,” he shared and picked up the take-out box.

He turned and took another seat facing the window to keep a lookout for his teacher. He watched a familiar silver car pull up outside the shop and the window closest to the street rolled down. Even from here, Johnny could see Taeyong’s worried eyebrows. The alpha nearly jumped from his seat and rushed out the café doors.

Mr. Lee motioned for him to get inside the car, and Johnny felt honored and slightly giddy. He opened the passenger door and quickly got inside to escape the softly falling snow.

The smell of Mr. Lee rushed through him like a happy memory. It had only been five days, but he missed this scent dearly. Johnny rolled up the window and felt the car start to pull away into the street. He put his backpack in the backseat, holding the chocolate cake in his lap. It was warm in the car, and Johnny let out a deep sigh after he sucked in a long breath through his nose.

“Hi,” Taeyong greeted and looked at him briefly before looking back at the road.

“Hi,” Johnny answered, “What is your plan here? I didn’t think you were going to pick me up, I figured you were going to come into the café.”

“I… I don’t have a plan,” Taeyong said with a deep laugh, “But remember, I’m still your teacher and we can’t really be seen by anyone we know…and I was just in town stopping by my sister’s place. You caught me at the right time,” Taeyong said and glanced over at Johnny, “Seatbelt, please?” he asked, and Johnny was so swept up in this unexpected turn of events that he nearly forgot. He pulled on his seatbelt and clicked it into place.

“Thanks for picking me up,” Johnny murmured, “I didn’t want to disturb anyone’s Christmas plans.”

“Well, lucky for you, I don’t really have Christmas plans this year,” Taeyong said, and it made Johnny’s eyebrows furrow.

“Really?” he asked.

“It’s fine. My parents are on a ski trip, and my sister and her husband are having Christmas with their kid, which I’m welcome to go to tomorrow if I want, but I’m on my own tonight. I was going to go home and cook myself dinner…” Taeyong shared and then looked back at Johnny for a moment, “…but, what happened with your mother?” he asked.

Johnny rubbed his face in his hands as he relayed what had transpired. Taeyong drove, quietly listening, and Johnny opened up to his teacher about his last two phone conversations he had had with his parents and his mother’s unwanted surprise from an hour ago, leading up to him storming out of his aunt’s place before the holiday could even start.

“It wouldn’t be a problem if she had just… _told_ someone she was coming to town, and if she didn’t come to the door with a _drink_ in her hand, but that’s a given. She knows I can’t stand it when she drinks… but she just… inserts herself, and assumes it’s going to be okay, and does whatever she wants. No matter how many times I try and tell her to back off, she doesn’t understand,” Johnny ranted, feeling his agitation rise again, “You know, it’s probably because she’s an alpha. Both of my parents are alphas and they are so stubborn, and headstrong, and they have this need to control _everything_.”

“ _Both_ your parents are alphas?” Taeyong asked curiously, “You don’t act stubborn or headstrong, I’ve seen you roll with punches better than a lot of other nineteen-year-olds,” the older man commented, and Johnny scoffed.

“Thank you, but, I’m basically the black sheep of my dysfunctional family,” he murmured under his breath, feeling a bitter taste in his mouth. In the silence, Taeyong let out a little laugh under his breath, “What’s so funny?” Johnny asked.

“I feel the same way about my family,” Taeyong said through a chuckle, “not the dysfunctional part, but the feeling of being the odd one out. My sister, and _both_ of my parents, are betas,” there was a moment of silence, and Johnny shook his head a little, his mind trying to work that out.

“How… sorry to be forward, but how did you come out an omega when _both_ of your parents are betas?” he asked.

“My grandparents were both omega-beta pairs,” his teacher shared just as he checked over his shoulder to pull onto the highway, “my parents were both betas, my sister is a beta, and I was… a genetic dice roll. A recessive gene,” he explained, “when my secondary gender showed itself, I wondered how it could happen, and _why_ it happened, and I felt very separated from my family because _I_ was the black sheep. My peers growing up told me I had a weird scent for an omega, and I always attributed it to me being from beta parents.”

“I don’t think you smell strange,” Johnny took from that, toeing their line, “I don’t really like super sweet omega smells,” he scraped up, “Just because you don’t smell like candy doesn’t make you a weird omega… you smell great to me,” he said. Taeyong’s mouth opened slightly, and he floundered. Johnny looked over at him and saw his face had pinkened just a little, his scent increased.

“Th-Thank you,” he answered, “Although, I could’ve probably gone the rest of the school year _without_ knowing that.”

“Sorry…” Johnny murmured and looked out the window, “I’ve been doing a lot of holding back, and today my mom just kind of… put a crack in my very structured walls,” he sighed, “Thank you, again, for saving me,” he said.

The two of them fell silent again, before Taeyong spoke up.

“…Does anyone know?” he asked hesitantly.

“About my mother?” Johnny asked back.

“No. About…” his shoulders raised a little bit, and he gestured between them with a quick wave of his hand, “… _this_ ,” he finally managed to get out. Johnny felt his pulse quicken. The topic. The whole problem. The forbidden territory. Johnny’s heart pumped a little heavier as Taeyong continued, “It gives me so much anxiety,” Taeyong shared, “I try and keep up the charade during class time, but I can’t sleep. I can’t _sleep_ , Johnny,” his teacher repeated, “I’m stressed out and exhausted all at the same time. The idea of someone knowing or finding out keeps me from relaxing at all hours. _This_ —” he said again, and waved his hand between them frantically, “…this freaks me out.”

 _This_. The elephant, as Taeyong had put it once; the thing they both acknowledged during the first week of school and then promptly put on the shelf, not to be touched, or looked at, or spoken about.

But right here, in a secluded car on the highway, the snow falling softly around them and just two people mixed up in a delicate situation… they could talk about it.

“It freaks me out too,” Johnny answered sincerely, and Taeyong let out a clipped sigh, his shoulders dropping, “I never intended for… _this_ ,” Johnny murmured, using Taeyong’s choice of words, “I haven’t told anyone about it. I _couldn’t_ tell anyone. I can’t even really say it to myself,” he admitted and looked down at the cake box in his lap, “What would I even say?” Johnny’s voice cracked openly as he let out his thoughts, “…Every Monday morning, I walk into the classroom and it feels like I’m finally breathing fresh air again, because all weekend I was… I couldn’t find your scent. Every morning, you come to school in a new outfit and I can’t compliment you. I can’t say anything. I would _never_ say anything. I’m also _terrified_ of someone finding out,” Johnny stressed, “As much as this freaks me out and I would love to confide in someone about it, I can’t. I can’t share it with anybody. So… only we know.”

Taeyong paused for a moment before he silently reached one hand over and placed it on top of Johnny’s, which was glued to the take-out box in his lap. Taeyong’s fingers gripped his firmly, and Johnny realized his hands were still cold, and Taeyong’s hand was shaking.

“Thank you,” his teacher murmured, Johnny tried to shift his hand to take Taeyong’s fully, but Taeyong pulled away after a moment and put both hands back on the steering wheel. Johnny felt a shard of glass in his heart at the fleeting touch, and he swallowed back his emotions, “I’m sorry about your family. Your mother seems like she’s hard for you to deal with… but you do know it comes from a place of love, don’t you?”

“ _Yeah_ ,” Johnny sighed, “I know she loves me, and she’s not doing any of this to hurt me… I just wished she took care of herself more,” he mused and looked out with window. They had been speaking about heavy topics for the last twenty minutes. Johnny turned in his seat and looked out every window of the car briefly, realizing he had no idea where his teacher was taking them, “Where are we going?” the student asked.

“Oh,” Taeyong muttered, “I guess… I’m going back to my house. Sorry, I’m kind of on autopilot.”

“Is that… okay with you?” Johnny asked, “You could take me to any of my friends’ houses.”

“No, I think… it’ll be alright,” Taeyong said, “Were outside of the city now. We shouldn’t see anyone we know. I’ll let you have dinner at my place, while you figure out your next move. You can’t tell anyone you were at my house though. Having a student in my home is grounds for firing me, so this has to remain our secret.”

“…Any secret I share with you is one worth keeping, Mr. Lee,” Johnny whispered, feeling more relaxed and open than ever before with the man next to him. Taeyong gave him a side glance, and Johnny saw the hint of a smile on the corners of his lips.

“I have something for you at my place, anyway,” Taeyong shared, and Johnny sat up straight and looked over at his teacher, a small smile breaking on his own lips.

“A Christmas gift?” Johnny asked hopefully.

“No,” but Taeyong smiled, keeping his secret.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the weirdness, I accidentally deleted a chapter and I had to fix it poste haste.  
> Here's chapter 6, four days early because I fail @_@  
> Please review, I live for them.  
> -Copper


	7. Christmas and Best Friends

Taeyong’s house was identical to all the houses on the uphill street. They all had a little garage, and a small planter by the front door, and snow on the grey slanted roof. Taeyong pulled up into his driveway, reached his hand to the visor of his car, and clicked a garage door opener. Johnny’s excitement was buzzing. He felt absolutely privileged to be able to come here, especially when they both knew he shouldn’t be. Taeyong pulled his car into the garage and clicked the button again to shut it after he had pulled in and parked.

“Okay,” Taeyong sighed as he got out of the car. Johnny got out too and pulled his backpack from the backseat, slinging it over one shoulder before he grabbed the cake box again. Johnny followed Taeyong to the door leading into the house graciously. It was cold in the garage, and the inside of Taeyong’s house was a lovelier temperature. It also smelled so relaxing to Johnny. He got notes of Taeyong but also of laundry and candles.

They slipped off their shoes, and Johnny swallowed as he watched Taeyong sink an inch, no longer wearing his boots with a slight heel.

“Come inside,” Taeyong offered, “I’m going to go to the bathroom really quick,” he said and excused himself down the hall. Johnny walked slowly into the house, sucking in every smell like it was the last time he was ever going to be there. It was so clean and organized, and Johnny realized it was just like Taeyong, white walls and cream carpets and wooden floors. He came into the main room of the house, seeing the kitchen and dining nook, which was connected to the living room. There was an L-shaped, blue couch with white pillows and a fuzzy grey blanket over the back of it. He had a decently sized television and stereo set and a black piano pressed up against the far wall.

Johnny laid his eyes on it, and his breath stopped.

It was the one thing that his grandma didn’t have at her house; a piano Johnny could play. His father had had one in his Chicago home basically on display in a room that people didn’t touch, and he knew his mother had one in a storage container somewhere in Illinois. The last time he had played was at his last high school, months ago.

His fingers gripped the cakebox, itching to lift the lid of the instrument, sit at the bench, and test the keys and pedals.

Johnny turned around and walked the short distance to the dining room table to set down the cake. He left it and wandered behind the couch to inspect the piano.

He softly lifted the lid and saw the immaculate black and white keys. He ran his finger over them slowly, wanting to play it but not wanting to disturb the quiet house or do anything to upset Mr. Lee.

He heard soft footsteps enter the main room again.

“What’s this?” the older man asked as he approached the box on his dining room table. Johnny turned around to face him and saw Taeyong had changed clothes. He had taken off his heavy winter coat and was now in sweatpants and a cream fuzzy sweater that was baggy on his little form. He also had a grey cloth in his hand.

“It’s two slices of chocolate cake,” Johnny said, and Taeyong’s eyes looked up to meet his from across the room. Johnny felt another rush. That same pesky pulling in his chest when Taeyong regarded him a certain way.

“Oh,” Taeyong blinked, “I see you found my piano,” he chuckled, and his face split into one of those rarer, dazzling, compassionate smiles, “Would you like to play it?” he asked. Johnny nodded immediately.

“I would,” Johnny whispered, “May I?” he asked, checking once again to see if it was alright. Taeyong nodded, his eyes slivering sweetly.

“You may, but before you do…” Taeyong crossed the living room and held out the grey article in his hands. Johnny looked at it and realized with a small start that it was his hoodie. The same one he forgot at school last Friday. He slipped his backpack off his shoulder and set it on the carpet next to the piano.

“My jacket?” Johnny asked, confused as he reached for it.

“Yeah… you left it in the classroom, and…” Taeyong mumbled, and Johnny looked up at his face, but Taeyong’s eyes were avoiding his, “…I took it home with me,” he finished.

“…On accident, or…?” Johnny asked slowly, his thoughts trailing off. Taeyong shook his head softly.

“No… remember in the car, when I said I was having trouble sleeping?” Taeyong asked, and Johnny’s eyes widened, “I’ve been having fitful sleep for _months_ ,” Taeyong admitted, his gaze still not looking at the other male, the shame of his secret evident in his face, “I’ve been sleeping with it these last few nights,” he finally admitted, and Johnny’s brain misfired at that piece of information, “It worked really well for two nights. I was able to fall asleep quickly, and stay asleep, but… your scent has faded a little.”

Johnny looked back into Taeyong’s face and truly stared for a prolonged moment. He looked at Taeyong all the time from a distance when he teaches, but this was _rawer_ and unencumbered. Their proximity now allowed Johnny to really see his features. He had noticed Taeyong’s dark circles before, but now he was _truly_ seeing them and seeing the exhaustion on the omega’s face. His heart felt broken.

“Ever since the beginning of this school year, I’ve had… _horrible_ insomnia,” Taeyong confessed, “This helped me for a little bit,” he said as he offered the jacket back to Johnny, who knew he was meant to take it but couldn’t make his hands work.

“You should keep it,” the young alpha said, trying to push it back into Taeyong’s arms.

“I can’t do that,” Taeyong whispered, his voice on the verge of cracking, “I shouldn’t have taken it in the first place.”

“But you need to sleep…” Johnny murmured, and Taeyong shrugged one shoulder and smiled half-heartedly.

“I’ll be okay,” he said and finally looked up to meet Johnny’s eyes.

Johnny felt _powerless_. He knew there were a dozen things he could do to help Taeyong sleep better. The mere news of Taeyong’s problem made Johnny’s instincts to protect and help sizzle behind his eyes. Taeyong pressed the jacket forward into his hands, making Johnny take it.

“I’ll be alright, Johnny,” Taeyong said again, and Johnny shook his head slowly.

“I hate it,” he whispered through clenched teeth, feeling out of control and frustrated and so very trapped and helpless, “I want to _help_ you,” the student said, and Taeyong smiled again.

“I know you do,” he admitted, “I don’t want you to worry about it anymore. Please. I’d like to hear you play the piano,” he said, changing the conversation. Johnny’s eyes darkened, and he turned to the instrument again. He had felt a spark of joy at the sight of it, but with the new information Taeyong just gave him… he lost the heart to play.

“I don’t really… want to right now,” he said.

“Then, how would you like to help me make dinner?” he asked, “I was going to make bibimbap from scratch. We can eat together. You can consider it payment for you treating me to kebabs that one time,” Taeyong asked, his voice had changed from vulnerable to the usual teacherly tone that Johnny was used to hearing from him.

“I’ve never made bibimbap before. I think I’ve only ever had it at a restaurant,” he admitted.

“I can teach you how,” Taeyong said, his eyes brightening, “It’s a complicated dish with lots of elements, but when it’s done right, it’s really a beautiful meal. And I’d appreciate the help,” he said. Johnny tried not to sigh, knowing Taeyong was trying to sweep his problem under the rug to maintain their tedious relationship, but Johnny didn’t see another way to help Taeyong while they were still stuck as teacher and student, and he had to respect that.

“Alright,” Johnny agreed.

~

Johnny found amusement in being taught how to make bibimbap by Taeyong. Even when he’s not at work, the omega man is a teacher at his core. Taeyong had multiple bowls, pots, saucepans, and utensils organized across his kitchen counter and stove. The square kitchen was actually a perfect size for the two of them, and Johnny was able to stand, observe, and help Taeyong without being too close and blurring their lines.

“When you cook the spinach, it’s only ten seconds in the boiling water, and then immediately transfer them into this bowl of cold water, to keep them crisp,” Taeyong said.

Johnny saw the work station like a battle zone of bowls of ingredients, the rice cooker at the back of the counter was home base, and all the bowls were defending it. Taeyong’s delicate hands flew through the ingredients and steps with confidence and ease, making sure everything was done at the right time.

“Would you like raw beef or cooked?” Taeyong asked as he took a slab of paper wrapped meat from the refrigerator and put it on its own cutting board.

“I’ll have whatever you’re having,” Johnny answered as he transferred the spinach from the boiling pot.

“Raw it is then,” Taeyong said with a little chirp. The older of the two look around and then set the meat on the cutting board before wandering over to the dishwasher. He opened it and pulled out a bigger mixing bowl. When Taeyong set it on the counter next to the meat, Johnny looked over briefly and startled a little bit when he saw it was one of the black glass mixing bowls he had gotten him a week ago. Johnny said nothing; he held a small, secret smile on his face as he watched Taeyong work quickly and expertly to slice up the meat. He then put it all into the new bowl and added garlic, soybean paste, and a couple other things to it and then set it aside.

Johnny felt so comfortable right then, and his mind wandered into a daydream, an alternate world where this was _their_ house, _their_ kitchen, and _their_ Christmas Eve tradition. Cooking food together in their socks, maybe some music playing...

“Wonderful, the rice is done,” Taeyong murmured under his breath, then looked up at Johnny, “I’ll start plating these. Would you be so kind as to start washing the dishes, please?” he asked. Johnny nodded, happy to help in anyway, seeing as he mostly stood back and watched Taeyong multitask through the meal prep. He emptied the remaining ingredients, gathered every dish to the sink, and began his little task. The kitchen smelt wonderful and homey. His stomach growled.

“All done,” Taeyong sighed happily, and Johnny turned to see the two deep bowls of food. It looked like a picture on a restaurant menu, it was so pretty. Every aspect of the meal was in its own place, creating a colorful and dazzling plate.

“Wow, that looks… amazing,” Johnny complimented, and Taeyong snapped his fingers.

“Oh, I almost forgot the egg!” he said and went back to the fridge. Taeyong went to the sink next to Johnny, and their shoulders brushed just slightly as Taeyong cracked one egg and siphoned out the white from the yolk with the shell. He did the same with the second egg, and Johnny looked over his shoulder to see Taeyong drop the perfectly intact yolks onto the top of the dish, like sunsets on the top of the small mountain.

Johnny turned off the sink and wiped his hands and walked over to look at it.

“You could have been a chef,” he complimented again, feeling freer to do so now that there was no one around he was keeping a front up for.

“I considered it for a while, but I love my job,” he smiled, “Are you hungry?”

“Yes, but I don’t want to destroy it, it looks too perfect.”

“Thank you, but I insist. Usually, this time of year I’ll watch a Christmas movie with my family or friends… if you promise to be neat while eating, we can eat this on the couch,” he said. Johnny’s heart pounded at the idea.

So silly and simple. Eating a home-cooked meal and sitting on a couch together shouldn’t give him such butterflies, but because it was Taeyong, it did.

“Let’s do it,” he said.

Taeyong’s couch was plushy, and his living room was well kept. Johnny sat at the corner spot so he could recline with his legs up across the sectional, and Taeyong sat in the middle, a few feet to his left. Not at the other end, to distance themselves, but not close enough for Johnny’s mind.

Taeyong fiddled with the remote on the television, finding a channel that was playing any Christmas movie, and Johnny waited respectfully for Taeyong to start eating first. Once Taeyong started swirling his perfect bibimbap together, Johnny did as well, watching Taeyong take his metal chopsticks to his mouth for a bite. Johnny then proceeded to dig in as well.

The first bite was full of different flavors, and the egg yolk made it somehow creamier. He had had at least three big mouthfuls before he stopped and leaned his head back to chew and enjoy it.

“Watching you eat is entertaining alone,” Taeyong said before taking another bite, and Johnny looked over at him and shook his head, letting out a loud yummy moan. He swallowed.

“This is your doing,” he said playfully, “You are, truly, an amazing cook,” the alpha boy complimented, trying to stick in as many as he could today, because he didn’t know when he would get the chance next.

Taeyong smiled again, his tired eyes crinkling, and they both continued to eat as the show played. Johnny set his empty bowl down on the glass coffee table first and waited for Taeyong to finish too so he could do the dishes. But Taeyong stood up first and gathered Johnny’s bowl.

“Can I open the cake you brought?” he asked. Johnny’s eyes flitted to the cakebox that he had nearly forgotten about.

“Yes, absolutely,” he floundered, “Do you want me to do the dishes?” he asked.

“No, you can relax,” Taeyong said breezily, and he patted Johnny’s shoulder as he stepped past his legs. Johnny watched him go, his shoulder trying to remember the weight of the other’s hand that left all too soon.

Taeyong returned with the two slices of cake on two little plates with forks, and Johnny purposefully placed his fingers over Taeyong’s as the older man passed him his plate.

“You must know by now how big my sweet tooth is,” Taeyong said with a sigh as he sank back into the couch in his original spot, tucking his feet up under him again, “I have peppermint bark leftover in my cabinets, but I can only take so much mint chocolate.”

“I thought you’d like it,” Johnny said, “the cake that is. I stomped through the cold for almost an hour after my encounter with my mom, so I was pretty lost. I walked into that random cafe, and the barista gave me a hot cup of coffee without even asking me for my order, and I bought the cake when you offered to pick me up… so it’s like thank-you cake,” Johnny rambled.

“Well, you’re welcome. I’m… rather happy to have a little bit of unexpected company today. But remember, no one else can know that this day happened,” Taeyong reminded him, looking at Johnny with a serious and halfway pleading look. Johnny set down his fork and reached his hand over, his pinky outstretched,

“I pinky-promise not to tell anyone,” he said. Johnny watched the cutest smile Taeyong tried to fight grow on his face, and he reached his hand over as well and linked their pinkies. They lingered like that for a beat, and Johnny had a very pleased look in his eye at Taeyong’s secret smile. They broke apart, and for the next few minutes, they ate chocolate cake together in silence while the Christmas movie played.

Johnny had texted his grandmother about the status update of their Christmas, but she hadn’t responded yet. She was probably still doing damage control, Johnny thought.

Taeyong had set his completely empty cake plate on the coffee table; there was nothing left on it but crumbs, a few swipes of chocolate frosting, and the fork he used. Johnny turned to ask Taeyong where his restroom was a few minutes later, but when he looked away from the television, Taeyong’s head was leaned back against the couch and his eyes were closed.

“Mr. Lee?” Johnny whispered, and Taeyong didn’t stir, “ _Taeyong_?” Johnny sang softly, but Taeyong did nothing but smack his lips together softly and turn his head slightly. He was fast asleep.

Johnny felt honored and slightly accomplished. It seemed that just with him being here in the house, he had lulled the older omega to sleep. The fact that Taeyong felt comfortable enough to sleep by him opened up Johnny’s world. He curled himself up onto the couch more and tucked his head onto his arm as he turned to admire Taeyong’s relaxed face. His eyelashes were long, and his lips were such a pretty shade of natural pink. His eyebrows looked unbothered, and he seemed so much gentler like this to Johnny, if that was even possible. Johnny stared at him with a small smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. He wanted to reach out and touch his hair, feel the smooth skin of his cheek, but he knew he could only look. He would curse himself to the moon and back if he did something greedy like touch the other and accidentally wake Taeyong up from his much-needed slumber. He stayed there for a minute longer watching his chest rise and fall in rhythm before his need to go to the restroom won and he made himself get up off the couch. He took the cake plates with him quietly and set them in the sink before he went to find the bathroom.

Johnny was fortunate to have found a hall bathroom right next to the kitchen, because the idea of going into Taeyong’s bedroom in search of one made red flags pop up in his mind. Being in a place as sacred as Taeyong’s bedroom would have killed Johnny, knowing he definitely was _not_ allowed in a room like that. He used the toilet, washed his hands, and checked his phone again as he made his way back to the couch.

He slowly sat back down, trying not to wake Taeyong up with any movement from the couch. Johnny reached for the television remote between them and turned down the volume substantially. He didn’t try watching the TV again, he turned back to watch Taeyong for a little bit longer. He mustn’t have been in a very comfortable position like that, is legs tucked under him and his neck bent back. He bit his bottom lip.

He wondered what would happen if he…?

Like a little experiment, Johnny released that special hormone under his normal scent. He could feel it in his fingertips and behind his ears, and it only took a few moments, about four heartbeats, before Taeyong stirred just a little bit. Johnny froze and watched. At first, a terrible feeling seeping into him, thinking he had woken his teacher up. Instead, Taeyong took a long drawl through his nose, and his eyes opened briefly. Johnny held his breath as Taeyong looked at him blearily through half-lidded eyes, before he shut them again and lowered his head to the couch cushion. In a moment of panic, Johnny realized where his head was going to land but was not quick enough to grab the pillow next to him.

He completely stilled as Taeyong’s head settled onto his thigh, and Johnny felt his heart rush as Taeyong let out a sleepy sigh and relaxed deeper into the sofa, letting his legs stretch out and pulling one hand up to brush his knuckles against the outside of Johnny’s leg.

Johnny’s left hand was hovering, not knowing what to do or where to put his arm. He looked around for a confused moment before he saw the throw blanket on the back of the couch. Johnny reached for it and pulled it slowly over Taeyong, being mindful not to move too much, but still get the blanket over his legs too.

Taeyong’s head nuzzled softly into his lap as the fuzzy blanket covered him, and after another long, sleepy sigh, he settled completely.

Johnny’s heart was thumping so loud, he wondered if he’d wake the sleeping man next to him. He didn’t know how appropriate or inappropriate this was. If the circumstances and setting were any different, Johnny would be forced to remove himself from a situation like this to keep himself under control.

But this was innocent enough, he told himself. There wasn’t… _truly_ anything bad going on here. He was helping Taeyong sleep. It wasn’t really his plan to have Taeyong lay his head in his lap. He reasoned that as long at Taeyong’s head didn’t slip to his crotch, this was fine. After a few seconds to calm down and to ensure Taeyong was fully asleep, Johnny lowered his arms slowly and relaxed.

He knew he shouldn’t be here, he knew it was wrong to feel this sort of innocent pleasure at having the weight of his teacher’s head in his lap, but it was Christmas, and there were secrets he could keep to himself. Johnny swallowed before he laid his hand softly onto Taeyong’s side, his arm dipping comfortably around him, and he let his scent thicken once more. Taeyong breathed deeply, and Johnny felt him relax further under his touch. The hairs on the back of Johnny’s neck stood on end as he took in this guilty but indulgent feeling of putting his arm around Taeyong while he slept, using his scent to lull him into a comforting slumber.

The television had been forgotten, Johnny was looking down at his beautiful teacher silently and feeling the warmth he craved tingle through his arm and hand. They fit perfectly; Johnny’s arm resting in the dip of Taeyong’s waist as he laid on his side.

Johnny secretly hoped his grandmother would never text back. He wanted to stay here forever and ensure Taeyong got as much sleep as his body needed. The younger male watched the omega’s shoulders rise and fall gently as he slept, and Johnny slowly put both of his legs up on the long part of the sectional, getting more comfortable himself.

He tried to watch the movie a bit more, but his thoughts were elsewhere. He periodically checked his phone, sending texts back and forth with his aunt about how his mother was still there and how they were trying to put her up at a hotel. He couldn’t be bothered. For all he cared, his mother could stay the night at his aunt’s house in his place.

He let his head rest back against the couch as he gazed down at his sweet sleeping teacher for a few moments longer. He felt a long yawn coming on before he could stop it, and Johnny realized that he too was being pulled under by the sweet smell of the man next to him. Before he could stop it, he was closing his eyes and drifting off to sleep.

~

The sound of a cell phone alarm beeping rather angrily from the other side of the house woke Johnny in an instant. He almost didn’t recognize where he was, because it was dark in the house besides the light from the television which was still on. Johnny felt the body next to him move, and Johnny was suddenly much more alert. His hand jerked off Taeyong’s waist, and he sucked in a breath through his nose.

“Taeyong,” Johnny spoke, and Taeyong groaned, “Your phone,” he said. Taeyong’s eyes opened, and then he sat up instantly.

“Y-Youngho?” Taeyong asked, confused, “Johnny, oh… I… I fell asleep,” he said and rubbed his eyes with one hand as he swung his legs off the couch, pulling the blanket with him, “shit, my alarm,” he said and finally got up.

“You have an alarm at…” Johnny picked up his own phone discarded on the couch and saw he had a few texts, “eight at night?” he asked.

“Yeah, I have…” Taeyong stumbled as he got up and went for the kitchen to find his cellphone, flicking on the kitchen light and making both of them wince at the harsh brightness in the once dark house, “…vitamins I have to take at the same time every day.”

Taeyong left the room as soon as he found his phone and turned off that terrible beeping. Johnny turned off the television with the remote and checked his phone and realized he had napped almost six hours, and more importantly, Taeyong slept just over six hours too.

He had messages from his grandma and aunt, telling him that it was safe to come back over, his grandma had taken care of his mother, and she won’t be returning until Christmas day. That message was a while ago though.

Johnny wondered if he could ask Taeyong to drive him or if it would be wiser to call a cab or an uber. He had slept through most of his precious minutes in Taeyong’s house, and it was almost time for it to end.

Taeyong came back into the room and came around to stand next to Johnny. The alpha looked up to see Taeyong, his normally neat hair mussed from sleep, staring blankly at the coffee table and the television.

“You cleaned up the cake.”

“I did.”

“And I slept... _really_ slept.”

“Yeah… for almost six and a half hours,” Johnny said, “You probably would have slept past midnight if your alarm didn’t go off… how do you feel?” he asked, sincerely worried it wasn’t enough time. Taeyong brought another hand up to rub his face again, and his hand settled on his mouth as he finally looked back at Johnny.

“Groggy, but I feel good,” he paused to yawn, “…much better, anyway. My sleeping schedule was already ruined, so this was just… a nice break from that mess. I know I’ll have trouble falling back asleep later.”

“…You could always sleep on the couch,” Johnny suggested, both of them knowing Johnny’s scent would still be there for a few hours after he left, “or… borrow my sweater again.”

“No, no I can’t borrow your clothing,” Taeyong said, eyes downcast, “honestly, it just reminds me of what I can’t have.”

Johnny knew he had to get out of there then, because that line, coming from Taeyong’s mouth, hit him way too close to his heartstrings. He wanted what he couldn’t have too.

“I—” Johnny started, “I’m going to order a lift. My family situation has defused, and I got the green light to go back,” he shared, trying to remain composed and put back up the walls they needed to keep up.

“That’s a good idea. You should be with family for Christmas,” Taeyong agreed and turned to walk into the kitchen. Johnny swallowed and forced himself to put back on a neutral face as he pulled up the app on his phone to get a taxi, even though he knew it was going to be expensive this time of night on this day of the year, “before you go—” Taeyong said, and Johnny looked up to see Taeyong raising the lights in the living room, making the white walls glow a soft yellow, “I still want to hear you play the piano.”

Johnny smiled and agreed.

After he placed the order for a taxi, he got up and went to the piano. His backpack was still next to it on the floor, his forgotten grey hoodie on top of it, and Johnny pulled out the bench from under the piano. He sat on the stool and lifted the lid, seeing the orderly black and white keys, and he pressed one, hearing the familiar tone and smiling.

He cracked his knuckles as his mind raced through what he should play, and he rested his stretched hands onto the piano’s surface.

His mind settled on an old favorite of his that he knew from a movie he had seen many, many times. The Name of Life from Spirited Away. The tune was so familiar to him, and he swayed his head back and forth as he lost himself for a moment in the sounds and the keys and the hand motions. His foot kept one of the pedals pressed to create the long, soulful notes. He miss-pressed a couple keys, so he slowed down a little, pacing the song a bit more, but after the fourth slip, he changed the song choice.

In the ten or fifteen minutes it took for the taxi to show up, Johnny ran through his favorites.

A little Yiruma, a little bit of Mozart to test how well he could remember it. A few classics his mother and an old piano teacher had taught him long, long ago. He found the perfect moments in each song to fade them into one another, almost seamlessly. He smelt Taeyong’s scent behind him, but he didn’t look back, he just put more of himself into the instrument, relishing and lingering in this feeling.

He enjoyed his basketball and his photography, but not as much as he enjoyed this.

He ended his little performance with a flourish, running through a complicated and loud piece from Franz Liszt once his fingers had remembered the strokes; it felt like the perfect crescendo. His phone buzzed from within his jean pocket, and he knew it was time to leave. He trailed his playing off and didn’t mean to make it sound so heartfelt and broken, but it felt that way in his heart and ears.

He lingered there for a moment, his hands resting on the keys, the sounds slowly fading back into the silence of a dark house, and he quietly and respectfully shut the lid of the piano once again. He looked to his right and found Taeyong standing a half step behind him. Taeyong’s eyes were alight, and it reminded Johnny of a moment in a library that felt many years behind them, even though it was only just a few months ago. Taeyong reached out his hand and placed it on Johnny’s shoulder once more, and Johnny reflexively crossed his arm to his shoulder to touch that hand. Their fingers connected, and Johnny felt at peace for a moment.

“You’re…” Taeyong started, and Johnny’s mind filled in many, many words Taeyong could have used then. Johnny saw the hesitation in the older man’s eyes as he searched for the right thing to say, something true that didn’t cross too many of their blurred lines, “…so very talented,” he breathed out finally.

“Thank you,” Johnny whispered. Taeyong pulled his hand out from under Johnny’s first, and Johnny felt his stomach sink.

“…I’ll put in a good word with the music teacher on campus. She’ll be happy to have someone like you play for her,” he said and turned himself away, pulling back. Johnny looked away too and took out his phone, his app telling him his car was around the corner.

“My ride is almost here,” Johnny murmured, and he slid out from the bench and tucked it back underneath the piano. There was a half-minute of silence as Johnny knelt on the floor and put his grey hoodie into his backpack with his other clothes. His fix for the piano had been touched but left unsatisfied; a feeling he knew all too well.

Johnny hefted his bag onto this shoulder, and Taeyong followed him to the door.

“Thank you for letting me stay for a while,” Johnny said, breaking the silence after he put on his shoes. Taeyong’s foyer felt colder than the rest of the house.

“You’re welcome. We both helped each other today,” Taeyong smiled. Johnny looked at him again and noticed his eyebags weren’t as prevalent now, but maybe it was the low lighting in the house.

They both turned their heads as car lights filtered through the window, and Johnny looked down at his feet for a moment before he held up is free hand, extending his pinky one more time.

“Our secret,” Johnny stated. Taeyong’s mouth split into another smile, but this one was much more bittersweet. He raised his hand, and they linked pinkies one more time.

“Our secret,” Taeyong repeated. Johnny let go first and smiled softly down at the other, his heart trying to stretch away from him.

He wanted to stay.

“Merry Christmas, Mr. Lee,” Johnny said.

“Merry Christmas to you too, Youngho.”

~

Christmas Day was pleasant for Johnny. Pleasant but not amazing. His mother was there, but after some sort of verbal smackdown from his grandmother the day before, she was on her best behavior. Johnny was actually proud of her for staying sober the whole day.

Johnny got his few gifts, and he was able to catch up with his cousins and play video games together in their new Christmas pajamas.

After Christmas came New Years, and Jaehyun had planned a day trip with some of their friends to go to a temple and pray for the new year, then go get a midday meal. Most of their friends had gone home for the holidays, and Johnny had wondered why they were even meeting up until he realized the group consisted Lucas, Sicheng, Doyoung, Mark, and Jaehyun; the stragglers who couldn’t go home for Christmas and the natives who wanted to make them feel better over it. Johnny knew his grandma wanted him home in the evening, but the six of them went out to join the New Years masses anyway.

The place was packed, and many of the shrine-goers were families with small kids in traditional hanboks, but the group enjoyed their time wading through crowds nonetheless. They got their turn to kneel and pray at the altar and make their New Years wishes, before they all decided it was time for lunch. They went to a restaurant that served hot noodle soup and tea, and they played a few little table games.

Lucas admitted he was feeling really sad without Ten, and although Sicheng didn’t say it, Johnny could see on his face that he felt the same about Yuta. Half of their group was back home with their families, and Johnny felt a momentary pang of guilt over not being too close to his father.

He got home that night and called his father before dinner, wishing him a happy New Year, and his father thanked him and told Johnny he was going to propose to his girlfriend tonight. Johnny shook his head but wished him luck, even though he hadn’t met Julia yet or even knew anything about her.

After the new year passed, Johnny was itching to get back to school, but on the first day back, his heart was pounding with anxiety in his chest.

He had no idea why, but the thought of seeing Taeyong again in the professional setting after experiencing the domesticity of his teacher’s life a week ago made his stomach queasy. He wanted to go back to Christmas Eve, but that was impossible.

He lingered by his locker longer than usual and spotted Taeyong and another teacher on their way up the hall, and Johnny panicked and went to the restroom before they could catch eyes. He sat in a bathroom stall with the toilet lid down, and he held his face in his hands for a minute, collecting himself and recomposing his face to appear normal, even though he didn’t feel that way at all. He exited the bathroom stall and washed his hands, hoping that that had been enough time for Taeyong to get to his classroom so Johnny could avoid him for a little while longer.

Johnny met Jaehyun and Ten in the hallway, and they stood outside their classroom to talk for a while. Ten gushed about how nice it was to go home, how he missed his sister and mom and Thai mangoes with sticky rice, but how he also hated to admit he missed Lucas a little bit too.

“I’m surprised he’s not here sniffing you out,” Jaehyun said with a smile, “He whined about you on New Years.”

“Whined is the _perfect_ word for it,” Johnny quipped, and Ten smiled in a way Johnny hadn’t seen before.

“He did?”  the omega asked, “What a shmuck,” he added, not about to let his happiness at being missed show at all, and Johnny snickered knowingly.

The bell rang, and Johnny’s stomach had a knee-jerk reaction. He followed his friends into the classroom, walking through the cloud of Taeyong’s smell that got to him like usual, and went to take his seat at the back of the class. It wasn’t until he was settled in his chair did he allow himself look up to see the object of his affection and desire for the first time since Christmas Eve.

Johnny’s heart melted for a mere moment, but in its wake left a hard stone that hurt inside his chest.

Taeyong looked well but still tired in a way that only Johnny could recognize.

When all the students had entered and class had begun, Taeyong asked everyone how their break was. A lot of people responded with ‘good’, ‘okay’, or ‘uneventful’, and someone asked Taeyong how his break was. Taeyong smiled softly in response, and Johnny hung on every word of his answer.

“It was good. I saw some people I care about very much, and on Christmas day I got to see my sister and play with my nephew,” he said simply but with a fond little smile. Before too much time could be wasted by everyone sharing stories of Christmas and New Years, the lesson had begun.

The day was a whirlwind for all the students. Sinking back into the school routine was rougher for others, especially with the reminder of midway exams coming early February. Taeyong had explained to them all that this month was going to go quickly, and that they had a lot to cover before they could start their review for their exams, and that parent-teacher conferences were going to be held in two weeks.

Johnny sat up straight at that news and raised his hand.

It was probably the very first time he raised his hand in Taeyong’s class, and he only realized it then because he had grown into the habit of staying quiet and not drawing Taeyong’s attention to him while class was going on, but this was important. Taeyong’s eyes caught the movement of his raised arm almost instantly.

“Yes, Youngho?” Taeyong called to him after he had raised his hand.

“Can you give us more information about parent-teacher conferences, please?” Johnny asked, his question slipping out of his mouth too quickly. The real question he wanted to ask was ‘ _Which parent did you contact?_ ’ but he didn’t want to sound scared.

The idea of his parents meeting Taeyong truly terrified him in a way he didn’t want to admit. Johnny saw Jaehyun turn his head around from the front of the class to peer at Johnny, and because Jaehyun did it, a few other students did too. Taeyong was silent for a second, not expecting a question at all, but he composed himself.

“…The parent teacher conference is pre-scheduled. The third week of January is a short week, and while all the students have two extra days off, teachers will be on campus holding half-hour meetings with parents. Either one, or both…” Taeyong didn’t let it show outwardly, and none of the other students probably noticed, but Taeyong gave Johnny a singular look showing he understood, “If you’d like, I can talk to you about it more at lunch or after class,” he offered, and Johnny only nodded and sat back in his seat.

If his gut had felt twisted before class, it was in knots now.

He had no idea parent-teacher conferences were a thing in Korea. If he read the syllabus they had been given at the beginning of the year, there was probably minor information on it there.

When lunch started, Johnny didn’t feel very well, but he got himself a water and a banana anyway because he knew he needed something; he didn’t think his nerves would appreciate coffee right now. He asked Jaehyun to come with him to Taeyong’s classroom so Johnny could ask about the conferences, and Jaehyun agreed.

“You’re super worried, I can tell,” Jaehyun said as they walked down the halls back to their homeroom.

“Yeah… my mom is in town right now, and if she hears about the parent teacher conference, she’s absolutely going to go, and that makes my anxiety skyrocket.”

“Whoa, what?” Jaehyun asked, perplexed, “Your mom is in town, and you didn’t tell me?”

“Yeah, sorry, it was a little hectic. She kind of… crashed my Christmas plans, and I freaked out.”

“What did you do?” Jaehyun asked, concerned and curious.

“I… I walked out,” Johnny said with a humorless laugh, “I didn’t even step foot in my aunt’s house on Christmas Eve when I saw she was there— holding a glass of wine at 11:30 in the morning, mind you. We had a big blowout in the front yard, and I took a long walk. Honestly, I almost called you, but I didn’t want to ruin your Christmas too. I went to a café and calmed down, and my grandma had a talk with my mom. I went back a few hours later, and she behaved herself, but I mostly ignored her the whole two days I was around her,” Johnny shared as much as he could, fudging the story only a little.

“Jesus…” Jaehyun sighed, and he nudged Johnny’s shoulder with his own, “dude, you should have called me.”

“Nah, I was fine… and I didn’t want to bombard your parents’ Christmas,” Johnny said, “I made friends with a nice barista, and it turned out okay in the end.”

They came up to Taeyong’s classroom, and the door was closed. Johnny knocked before opening it and the smell of Taeyong, which left his nose every time he exited the room, washed up upon him again and for a moment settled his stomach.

There was another teacher in the classroom with him, an alpha female teacher wearing a black pantsuit that looked quite chic on her.

“Oh, just the student we were speaking about! Seo Youngho— ah, and Jung Jaehyun, please come in,” Taeyong motioned for them both to enter the room, and Jaehyun softly shut the door after them.

Johnny looked back and forth between the two teachers for a moment before the woman stood up from her place sitting on a student’s desk to cross to Johnny with an outstretched hand. Her high heels sounded lovely and confident on the linoleum floor, and Johnny raised his hand to shake hers instinctively, bowing a little too. Even in her heels, Johnny still stood clear over her.

“Youngho, this is Miss Kwon, the choir and piano teacher on campus,” Taeyong introduced, and Johnny’s eyes met hers with newfound appreciation.

“Oh, hello,” Johnny said and bowed again, “it’s very nice to meet you. My friends call me Johnny,” he said with a soft smile.

“ _Johnny_ , I like it,” she said and picked up his hand to look at his fingers in a way that felt a little intimate, “Mr. Lee says you play the piano very well, but he didn’t need to tell me, I can tell by your hands. Long fingers,” she said quite forwardly, and Taeyong behind her shut his eyes and shook his head like he couldn’t believe she just said that, “When are you going to come and play for me? During club hours? Today?” she asked, “My last protégé graduated last year, and I’ve been looking for a new, talented student to work with.”

“I-I want to, but I have basketball today…” Johnny murmured and gently pulled his hand from hers.

“I’ll write you a note,” she pushed, “It’ll take a half hour tops.”

“Boa, how about in a week or two?” Taeyong asked quietly from behind her, “The basketball team is doing really well this year, and it’s important for the whole team to get together after a break like the one we just had,” Boa, the music teacher, snorted at Taeyong’s words, “besides, you’re going to hear him play, and then you’re going to steal him from the basketball coach. It would be better if you waited for basketball season to end, in February.”

“ _Fine_ , you win,” she pouted haughtily and pointed to Johnny, “You’re going to play for me soon, Johnny-boy,” she promised before she walked past him, “ _Jaehyunnie_ —” she cooed in a different tone, and Johnny snapped his head around at the familiarity in her voice, “—You didn’t join my choir this year. I miss you,” she said, and Jaehyun smiled, a big dimpled one.

“I’ll audition when basketball ends in February, Miss Kwon,” he promised, and she reached up and pinched his cheek affectionately, and Johnny the realized that the touching was just her being friendly.

“You know you won’t have to audition. You’re the only beta I know with a baritone voice. I need you back,” she said, and Jaehyun laughed. Miss Kwon patted his shoulder and turned to point at Johnny again as she walked out, the sound of her heels marking her path, “See you later Taeyong,” she called, and Mr. Lee called back to her.

As she left the room, Taeyong smiled at Johnny.

“Don’t worry, she’s always like that,” he said, “You wanted to talk about parent-teacher conferences?”

“Yes. How do I find out which parent the school contacted?”

“I can already tell you that an email was sent yesterday to both addresses we had on file for you. I don’t know if they went to your mother, father, or grandmother though.”

“ _Shit_ ,” Johnny cursed under his breath.

“ _Language_ ,” Mr. Lee countered, “I can see about pulling up your profile, and verify which emails are on file for you,” Taeyong offered and picked up his tablet from his desk.

Johnny thanked him as Taeyong poked at his tablet a few times, then swiped it like he was scrolling. When Taeyong read him the emails, Johnny’s stomach sank.

“They went to both my parents…” Johnny sighed, “My father isn’t going to fly out here for a half hour meeting with you, I can already guarantee that, but my mom is in town…” Johnny growled and raised his hand up to his face to pinch his nose, “This is _terrible_ ,” Johnny said with another humorless laugh, and Jaehyun nudged him again.

“Hey, nothing is certain yet. She might be going back home before the conferences start. Also, your grades are fine, right? She’ll have nothing to complain about.”

“Yeah, except she’ll find reasons to complain about _everything_ ,” Johnny groaned, “I have to talk to her, and ask her not to come.”

“Johnny,” Taeyong spoke, and both students turned their heads back up to their teacher, “Tell your grandmother to come to the conference, and if your mom comes too, everything will be fine. You’re welcome to come to the conference as well. We’ll go over your grades, and your expected grade point average come graduation, and we’ll discuss colleges and what path would be right for you.”

“ _That_ part,” Johnny scoffed, “ _That_ scares me. My mom and college are two topics I really don’t want mixing.”

“It’ll be _fine_ ,” Jaehyun cooed from his side, “You can go to the conference too, and make sure she behaves.”

“Ugh, I don’t know what to do!” Johnny groaned and walked away from Jaehyun, beginning to pace as he went over his options in his head, “I don’t know if my mom has seen the email or not. If I call her and ask, then she’ll definitely know that there’s a parent teacher conference and she’ll have two weeks to make the arrangements to stay in Seoul and go to it. Or, I _don’t_ bring it up to her and wait to see if she figures it out on her own. I have no idea how often she checks that email. She might not ever check it, and therefore we won’t have a problem, but what if she—”

“Johnny, _stop_ ,” Taeyong said with a stern but concerned voice, and the alpha boy did. He hadn’t realized that he had made both people in the room very uncomfortable, he could see it in Jaehyun’s shoulders and Taeyong’s eyes, “You need to breathe…” Taeyong’s voice took on a soothing cadence as he took a few slow steps towards him with his hands out in front of him, “…and put your eyes back, please,” he requested softly.

Johnny blinked and realized his hands were balled into fists and his eyes had turned red. He turned his chin down, and he gazed at the floor as he did exactly what Taeyong said. He took three deep breaths and Taeyong along counted for him.

“One… two… three…” on the third exhale, Johnny felt a little calmer and Taeyong put a hand on his shoulder. He instantly felt the effects of the simple touch, and he let his shoulders unwind. He took one more breath before he turned his head back up to look at his teacher and his friend, “There we go,” Taeyong said lightly, “Go back and eat some lunch with your friends, and then go see your teammates and try to not think about the conferences,” Taeyong said, his hand remaining on Johnny’s shoulder, “Whatever happens, will happen. You can’t control it, but you can control how you handle it.”

Those words stuck with Johnny, and he felt resigned, humbled, and thankful for them.

Taeyong took his hand off Johnny’s shoulder, and Johnny felt his heart ache at the loss.

“Go on, now,” he said, “go be with your friends.”

Johnny nodded without a word, and he side stepped passed Taeyong and went up to Jaehyun, whose eyes had settled onto Johnny with an unknown look.

“Let’s go,” Johnny murmured, and Jaehyun nodded, “Thank you, Mr. Lee,” Johnny said quietly before he left the room, and Jaehyun followed him.

~

“Hey, Johnny…” Jaehyun asked him two days later as the bell rang for lunch. Johnny had just stood up from his seat, and he was about to find the rest of his friends and go to the cafeteria together, but Jaehyun was standing above his desk before he could even register it, “…can we talk?” Jaehyun asked. Johnny’s eyebrows furrowed in concern, and he looked up at his long-time friend. Johnny had noticed yesterday that Jaehyun had been very quiet all day.

“Yeah… is everything okay?” Johnny asked slowly. Jaehyun nodded.

“Yeah… no… sort of…” he answered with a shrug and a tilt of his head, “I just… I’ve been needing to talk to you about some stuff, and I haven’t been able to really… put any of it into words. Can we go up to the roof after we get lunch?”

“The _roof_?” Johnny asked incredulously.

“ _Yeah_ … it’s not a conversation for anyone else to overhear,” he said.

“…Sure,” Johnny answered, “Should I be scared?” he asked with a little laugh, trying to make it more lighthearted. Jaehyun didn’t answer, and that struck a chord in Johnny. He noticed Jaehyun look back at Ten, Yuta, Doyoung, and Sicheng, and give them all a nod before the two of them walked out into the hall alone, separate from their group.

They got cafeteria lunches, and then Jaehyun lead Johnny through a part of the school he hadn’t been to yet. He knew there was a rooftop gardening club, but Johnny had never had a reason to go seek it out. Jaehyun opened the door at the top of the stairs which would have led to a third story of the school if they had one. The January air was cold, and Jaehyun shut the door after them. The two of them wandered around the rooftop looking for a good place to eat and to see if anyone else was up there. Johnny eyed the garden, which was covered by green tarps to keep the elements from destroying it. There was even a little green house, and Jaehyun found a secluded bench against the wall of the stairwell near it.

They sat, and Johnny sipped at his coffee. There was an awkward silence between them that made Johnny nervous. Jaehyun had never made him nervous before. He had always been comfortable, and Johnny had always considered him one of his best friends.

“So…” Johnny started, “Are we gonna talk, or are we just going to sit here?” he asked. Jaehyun sucked in a breath through his nose.

“I noticed something about you a while ago,” he started, “but I didn’t really realize what it was until Monday,” he said, “I kind of thought you were a little stupid for not realizing it… but then I realized that I was the one being stupid all along,”

Johnny didn’t know what to make of this, but then Jaehyun turned to look him in the eyes.

“…You know I like you, right?”

Johnny stared at him for a moment, his eyes widening slowly as this information smacked him in the face.

“ _What_?” Johnny asked, almost as if he truly didn’t understand what Jaehyun was telling him. Jaehyun opened his mouth, but his next words were suspended for a moment; he looked away from Johnny to fix his gaze on the greenhouse.

“I have had… the _fattest_ crush on you since the first week of school,” Jaehyun said, “And I had no idea how to tell you. We were such good friends as little kids, and then we didn’t see each other for, like, eight years, and then suddenly you told me you got into this school too, and I was like ‘Cool, great, I get to see Johnny again’ but then you showed up on the first day and surprised me and I like… I fell _head_ over _heels_ ,” Jaehyun spilled, and Johnny couldn’t speak. Jaehyun continued:

“I joined the basketball team with you, even though I wanted to be in music and dance. You invited me over to your place a _lot_ . We still study together, like, almost every weekend, I thought it was because maybe you liked me too, but then Ten told me he wanted you to help him with his heat, and I… I dunno, I got too in my head over it,” he said and looked away but continued his story, Johnny’s mind was racing trying to keep up, “And then, like a _dumbass_ , I tried to get you and Ten to hook up, because he asked me to, and I didn’t want to be a shitty friend. But then you didn’t go through with it— you called _me_ ,” Jaehyun said and put a hand to his chest, “And I thought to myself ‘Oh my god. It’s happening. He didn’t get with Ten because he realized he likes _you_ ,’ and I was expecting… to come to your house, and you’d tell me you liked me— and you _didn’t_ … we just… did what we normally do. And I thought to myself, ‘What the hell?’, because if you _didn’t_ like me, then you had no reason _not_ to get with Ten… but then I realized it,” Jaehyun said and turned back to Johnny again, “I realized this Monday why it wasn’t me, and why it will _never_ be me… I know who you like.”

Johnny had been sitting frozen listening to Jaehyun’s confession, but when he said that last line, Johnny’s defenses rose. His anxiety rose. His fears rose.

“I don’t like anyone,” Johnny lied. Jaehyun tilted his head and looked at Johnny with a knowing and broken look.

“Johnny… I _know_ ,” he said again, and Johnny felt like throwing up when he said that so confidently, “I figured it out. You do a _really_ good job of pretending everything is okay. The only reason I noticed who it was… is because I spend a lot of my time noticing you. And on Monday, I saw you and him, and it clicked. Looking back on all these little moments now, I totally get it, and I see it all so very clearly…”

“I don’t—”

“On Halloween you couldn’t even _look_ at him, but on our first game of the season, every time you made a shot, your gaze always fell back to him on the bleachers. Our first basketball game was when I really noticed that something was up, but I couldn’t put my finger on it just yet. My mom suggested inviting you and your grandma over for Thanksgiving, remember? You had barely got your shoes off before she was asking you if you had anyone you liked in class, and you said ‘no’ but I saw your little hidden smile, so I tried to figure it out. On Monday I realized it, and I also realized it’s not just you. He calls _everyone_ in their class by their preferred name; Ten, Doyoung, even me… but not you. He _exclusively_ called you ‘Youngho’. But on Monday he called you ‘Johnny’, and he put his hand on your shoulder, and he calmed you down almost _instantly_ , and I… I saw the way you looked at each other. That’s when it all clicked together for me,” he said solemnly and looked at Johnny again, “You like Mr. Lee, don’t you?” he finished, and Johnny looked down at his feet. He set his bottle of coffee aside, not wanting to eat a thing anymore. He felt his bottom lip quiver, and he sucked in a very telling breath, “It’s okay, Johnny,” Jaehyun whispered, “I _know_ ,” he repeated.

It was then that Johnny broke apart on that bench.

He couldn’t do it anymore. It was all too much. The secret, the hiding, the posturing, pretending everything was fine… he sobbed and curled over his knees to bury his face in his uniform slacks. Jaehyun wrapped his arm around Johnny’s shoulders and leaned into him.

“It’s okay,” Jaehyun repeated again, “you can tell me.”

“ _It’s not okay_ !” Johnny moaned through his whole body, “ _Nothing is okay. It’s been so hard, Jae. From the moment he walked in the door on the first day of school… I was totally fucked,_ ” Johnny sobbed harder, switching to his first language without thinking, “ _I did everything I could to try and fight it. I tried to put distance between him and I. I wanted to take the dance class but he was the teacher in charge. I tried not to have these feelings and I tried to get with Ten, and I couldn’t help but thinking about how wrong it all felt,_ ” Johnny sat up again, and Jaehyun sat close, holding his hands in comfort, “I’ve been trying so hard to keep it all in, and to not let anyone see. If anyone finds out, I could get expelled, and he could lose his job, and the thought of not getting to see him anymore, even from a distance, _makes me want to throw up_ ,” he wept again and held his sleeve up to cover his eyes, “ _I tried so hard… to keep it together…_ ”

He hated crying like this. He _hated_ this kind of vulnerability, but Johnny was only human. Since Jaehyun had figured it out, there was no way he could keep the secret from him. Johnny felt Jaehyun pull him closer until his head rested on his friend’s shoulder and Jaehyun had a hand in his hair.

They stayed like that for a minute, and Johnny sobbed, his façade breaking apart like brittle chalk. After a half minute, Jaehyun started softly shushing him.

“ _I won’t tell anyone_ ,” he whispered, and Johnny managed to sit up again, rubbing his eyes, “I realized how sticky the situation was when I figured it out. I’m the only one who knows. I promise I won’t tell Ten, or Yuta, or _anyone_. This is just between you and me.”

“...And Taeyong,” Johnny sniffed. Jaehyun smiled just a little bit.

“He lets you call him ‘Taeyong’?” he asked gently. Johnny shook his head.

“No… he’s reminded me… many, _many_ times that we have to be mature and professional at all times.”

“Have you guys… talked a lot?” he asked. Johnny’s shoulders slumped and he swayed his head, not knowing how to answer that.

“Not really, but when we’ve gotten the chance to be alone, we can talk about it. We both kind of… agreed to ignore it,” Johnny swallowed thickly, “ _It hurts… every fucking day_.”

“…You can’t help it, can you?” Jaehyun asked. Johnny shook his head and felt his chin quiver again as more feelings surged up over that simple, loaded question.

“ _No_ ,” he cried again, cold tears running down his face and his shoulders wracking, “I tried so hard to block it out but it’s like… you know those old fairytales and things… where two people meet, and without even seeing each other, just by smell alone, they know that that’s the one.”

“…Stories of soulmates?” Jaehyun asked, and Johnny nodded.

“Yeah… I think I have that… _and it sucks_ ,” Johnny admitted, “I wish it wasn’t him. I wish it was someone else. I wish it could have been you, or Ten… it’s so complicated and dangerous… but every morning, when I walk into his class, I feel like I’ve been reborn again. He smells like… perfection, and home, and...” Johnny trailed off, a word on the tip of his tongue, but it was a word he couldn’t say. He could never take it back if he said ‘love’. Taeyong smelled like _love_.

“…Do you think he feels the same?” Jaehyun asked quietly. Johnny’s shoulders sagged. He felt drained of life.

“I dunno. He… he’s better at keeping himself in check than I am, but he’s said a few things that hint at something like that… but I can’t _think_ about those things. I can’t. It _literally_ kills me inside, and it's only January. I’ve been pretending everything is fine for _four months_ and I have… five _more_ months of keeping it together. There can’t be anything more between us than a student and teacher relationship. That’s how it is. That’s how it _has_ to be.”

There was a moment of silence between them again before Jaehyun spoke up.

“If soulmates really do exist… I’ll never have that,” Jaehyun said. Johnny looked up at his friend. Jaehyun’s nose and ears were red, and his eyes looked watery, but Johnny was sure he looked much worse in comparison, “I’m a _beta_. Fairytales of true mates only happen with alphas and omegas,” he said and looked down at his hands holding Johnny’s, “I always liked and appreciated being a beta, but when I met you again this year, I wished I had become an omega. Then maybe… it could have been me.”

Johnny felt guilt drip into him. Here he was, crying over his crush who he couldn’t have, in front of his friend who had just admitted to crushing on him.

“I’m sorry,” Johnny murmured and tried to pull his hands from Jaehyun’s, but his friend wouldn’t have that, and he gripped harder.

“ _No_ ,” Jaehyun said, “Don’t apologize. It’s not your fault, and it’s not mine either. It’s just _life_ ,” Jaehyun said, “I stopped trying to like you after Thanksgiving, so this is… it’s not fresh. I had already accepted that you and I weren’t going to get together _before_ I realized this thing about you and Mr. Lee. Once I realized though, I had to confirm it, and I couldn’t really ask you about it without telling you about my feelings…” Jaehyun murmured, “I’m the one who should be sorry. I know why you have to keep up all the pretenses you do, and I want you to know that I’m not going to tell anyone about your business. It’s not my place, and I don’t want anything to happen to you, or Mr. Lee,” Jaehyun said, and it made Johnny’s heart swell with newer, happier, thankful tears.

“Thanks, Jaehyun,” Johnny whispered, “You’re a much better friend than me. I can’t believe I didn’t notice your feelings. Looking back on all the little hints now… I totally see it.”

“Yeah… my mom and I agonized over how thick-headed you had to have been not to have gotten my hints, but now in retrospect it all makes sense. You didn’t notice me because you were too wrapped up noticing someone else.”

“Ugh, your _mom_ ,” Johnny groaned, and Jaehyun laughed lightly, the mood lifting a little, “she was making it obvious, too. I really am _dumb_ ,” Johnny said with a little laugh of his own, his first smile this entire conversation. They sat there for a moment more, holding hands. The January air was still, and they could hear the sounds of the city floating over the walls of the school, “It feels good…” Johnny admitted, and Jaehyun turned to look at him, “…to let someone know. Keeping this secret has been chipping away at me, and I can’t talk to Taeyong or anybody about it.”

“I kind of… _want_ to know,” Jaehyun said with a little smile, “It’s _peculiar_ to me, and now that I know for sure, I have _so_ many questions. What did you get him for Christmas?” Johnny smiled and looked down at the ground.

“Baking stuff,” he admitted, “mixing bowls and utensils. He cooks every one of his meals and brings his lunches to work. He has a big sweet tooth and likes to bake his own desserts, which he eats in his car on the way home from the school,” Johnny shared, and Jaehyun laughed, “He lives about forty minutes away by car… and he goes to a butcher to get all his meat fresh. His favorite dishes include _raw beef_ ,” he said, and Jaehyun’s nose wrinkled.

“That’s so weird. I would have never guessed that,” Jaehyun mused, “I have another question… he referred your piano playing to Miss Kwon… where did he hear you play?” Jaehyun asked. Johnny sucked in a long breath and turned to Jaehyun, gripping his hands a little tighter and making Jaehyun look him in the eye.

“I’m going to tell you this, but you can’t tell _anyone_.”

“You have my secrecy, I swear,” Jaehyun promised, and Johnny licked his lip.

“…On Christmas Eve, after the fight with my mom, I told you I took a walk to a café to cool off, and that I went back a few hours later… I lied. I emailed Taeyong about my problem— _totally_ random, I was going to text _you_ — but then he offered to picked me up in his car and… we went back to his place...”

“ _Whoa_ —”   “ _I know_ .”   “— _That is huge_.”

 _“_ I _know_ ,” Johnny repeated with a deep nod.

“What happened at his house?” Jaehyun asked quickly, his eyes full of curiosity.

“He wasn’t going to see his family until Christmas day, so he was happy to have some company. We made dinner together, and ate cake and then… and here’s the _wildest_ part… he fell asleep next to me on the couch, and then I fell asleep too.”

“You _napped_ together?” Jaehyun asked with closed eyes, “John, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but that’s fucking _adorable_.”

“I _know_ ,” Johnny sighed, “it was the most… whole I have felt since the beginning of the school year. When we woke up, I ordered a taxi on my phone so I could go back home, and Taeyong had a piano in his living room. I got to play it for like fifteen minutes. It was amazing. I forgot how much I love music…” he trailed off.

They fell silent again, but this time it was more pleasant.

“You really like him, huh?” Jaehyun asked once more. Johnny nodded, relieved to finally be able to admit it to someone.

“ _Yeah_ …” Johnny sighed, “It’s really hard… but like you said: That’s life,” he smiled and looked up at Jaehyun again, “Thanks… for being a really good friend.”

“Yeah… I am a really good friend,” Jaehyun said with a small grin, “In the words of our wise teacher: ‘We can’t control anything, but we can control how we handle it’,” Jaehyun said, and Johnny took a deep sigh and looked back at the concrete ground before them. They stayed like that a minute longer as Johnny geared himself up to go face the rest of their friends and be a normal student again.

“Did you know that Doyoung has the hots for me?” Jaehyun mused, changing the subject around completely.

“ _Really_?” Johnny asked, incredulous again.

“ _Yeah_. He told me on New Years. Well, he didn’t really tell me so much as he walked me home and then kissed me very suddenly at my front door.”

“ _Really_?” Johnny asked again but more impressed, “That would explain why Doyoung is so lukewarm with me,” he figured, and Jaehyun barked with laughter for a moment.

“Between you and me, his kisses have been super rushed. I’m going to have to tell him to slow down next time. But he’s probably boiling right now because I’m up here having a private conversation with you, and everyone knows that I used to like you.”

“Oh my God, _everyone_ ?” Johnny groaned, “I’m just the dumbass of the year, huh? I don’t notice _shit_.”

“You _really_ don’t,” Jaehyun laughed and stood up, taking Johnny’s hands with him, “let’s go back inside. It’s fucking cold out here,” he said, and Johnny agreed, standing up as well.

“Wait, how many times has he kissed you since New Years?” Johnny asked, still reeling from their conversation, and Jaehyun smiled over his shoulder at him with a quirked eyebrow.

“Wouldn’t _you_ like to know?” he teased, and Johnny put his hands up in surrender.

“You know what… I think that’s between you and him,” Johnny agreed, and Jaehyun snickered again as they made it back inside. They found their group sitting on the stairs near Mr. Lee’s classroom, and Ten pointed at them and was the first was to ask.

“Oh my God. How did it go? Are you two together now?” he asked in nearly one breath.

“Nope,” Jaehyun said and stepped past Sicheng to sit next to Doyoung on the stairs, “The John-Jae couple was never meant to be. Johnny is dumb and can’t notice when anyone has feelings for him.”

“Seriously. I’m basically undateable,” Johnny said and sat next to Mark, “I couldn’t even tell when my best friend had a crush on me, so that has to mean something.”

“But… you two are good, right?” Yuta asked, pointing back and forth between them, “It was a good talk?”

Jaehyun and Johnny exchanged a look, and they both smiled at each other.

“Yeah, we’re good,” Jaehyun said and looked up at Doyoung and gave him a comforting smile. Doyoung’s shoulders physically relaxed, and he put his arm casually around Jaehyun’s side.

Johnny regarded them like that for a second before he looked away.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg I've been waiting for this for like eight months, hope you liked it.  
> I'm going on vacation for a week so the next update will take a bit longer than usual, just letting you babes know.  
> Please review so I have lovely things to read when I get home to my computer n.n  
> -Copper


	8. Piano and Parent/Teacher Conferences

On Friday, Johnny’s stomach was upset with anxiety again. He had a small secret planned and he didn’t know how well it would go over. After basketball, and evening classes, the final bell rang and Johnny had his head down in his worksheet, pretending to finish it up. Lucas and Mark tried to wait for him, but Johnny waved them out.

He watched as all the other students left out the classroom door and then looked at his teacher. He saw Taeyong saying goodbye to his students and then look over at the last one remaining. Johnny turned over his paper, answered the last question he had been saving, and wrote his name at the top. He stood up, saying nothing.

He opened his bag and slowly put away his things as he stared at the article he had tucked away in there all day. His small gift. His newest secret.

It was a sweater, one that he had worn to sleep every night this week. He didn’t like wearing clothing to bed, but it was cold enough to warrant sleep clothes, and by sleeping in it, it was nearly bathed in his natural scent.

He took out the sweater from his bag and looked up at Taeyong. Their eyes locked as Johnny set it on the top of his desk with finality and then walked away from it, leaving it there.

He came up to the front of his class, his heart thudding hard in his ribcage waiting for Taeyong’s reaction, to see if he’d say anything or turn him down. Johnny set his completed worksheet on top of the stack of everyone else’s. Taeyong’s eyes were still locked on the innocent sweater on the other side of the room, and for a brief second, he tore his eyes from it and looked up at Johnny. His eyes were wide, and his lips were slightly open in disbelief, the student could see the many questions behind his silent expression.

“Have a good weekend, Mr. Lee…” Johnny murmured, “…I hope you sleep well,” he added quietly as he walked out the open classroom door. He turned to shut the door and saw Taeyong’s eyes trained back on the sweater as he left.

His heart pounded as he walked to the bus stop, hoping his teacher accepted his little gift and wondering if he’d take it or leave it.

~

On Monday morning, he made sure to get to school earlier than usual. The halls were so empty, and there were only a handful of sleepy students there. Johnny kind of enjoyed the quiet spaciousness of a near empty school, and he made his way to his classroom. Before he walked in, he saw Taeyong standing behind his desk. The light from the sun was floating in through the open blinds, and the slender omega man was unloading stacks of papers and graded assignments from his bag. Johnny poked his head inside, and Taeyong’s smell swirled into his lungs like fresh air. He saw two other early-bird students in the room, and on his desk in the very back was his sweater hanging over the back of his chair innocuously.

He looked back up to Taeyong as he wandered in, and he noticed immediately how bright his teacher looked. Taeyong saw him, and his face split into a smile more dazzling that Johnny had ever seen before. His heart jumped at the honor of basking in its glow.

There was more color in Taeyong’s face today, and the shadows under his eyes were nearly nonexistent.

‘ _Thank you_ ,’ he mouthed to Johnny silently. The alpha felt ten feet tall in that moment, and he couldn’t help but smile and nod back. He walked quickly to his seat and set his backpack on the chair and picked up the sweater. Before he could press it to his face, he smelled Taeyong’s scent emanating from it, and when he finally raised it to his nose inhale it deeply, his brain was bathed in gold. The way both his smell and Taeyong’s smell lingered on the piece of clothing made Johnny’s soul sing in a way it hadn’t before.

This smell was _right_. This smell was his future and his goal.

In that very moment, Taeyong and him locked eyes from across the room, and it was like the universe fell away. Johnny was swept into the world of their very own, where everything smelled like the perfect mixture of the two of them.

He knew in that moment that he was going to wait for Taeyong. It didn’t matter how many months or years. It didn’t matter that they were teacher and student. One day they wouldn’t be, and when that day came, Johnny was going to show Taeyong exactly what he means to him.

He hadn’t thought about summer or graduation or what came next, but as he smelled the perfect concoction of his scent and Taeyong’s scent— married together on that sweater —he knew what he wanted more than anything. This day by day, hiding, dodging, and pretending would one day come to an end, and Johnny wouldn’t have to skirt around it anymore.

He folded the sweater neatly and tucked it back into his backpack before anyone else could discover it and smell their secret. Johnny was already picking the next clothing gift he was going to let Taeyong borrow for next weekend— and every weekend after that —until graduation.

~

Johnny learned the following week that the music teacher at Seoul International High School was hardcore.

On Monday, Johnny was in the locker rooms about to begin practice with the others when the boys started yelling louder than usual. Johnny and Jaehyun poked their heads up over the lockers and saw the students scrambling to cover themselves as a _woman_ sauntered her way through the boys’ locker room to the coach’s office, her high heels clacking on the concrete.

“Holy _shit_!” Jaehyun hissed under his breath, and Johnny’s mouth fell open as he watched the music teacher, Miss Kwon, glide past the lockers like she owned the place. She didn’t break her gaze from her destination as she ripped open the door to their coach’s office and walked right in.

“Whoa, who the fuck was that?!”

“She just walked in here!”

“Doesn’t she know this is the men’s locker room?!”

The boys were chattering back and forth, perplexed, and Johnny slowly pulled on his jersey. They could see through the window into the coach’s office as Miss Kwon stood there with her hand on her hip. She surveyed their coach reading over the piece of paper she had just handed him.

Johnny saw his coach scratch the back of his neck and then shrug. She turned back to the door with a pleased smile on her face.

As she exited the office and back into the locker room, all the boys were staring at her now, and she cleared her throat even though she already had everyone’s attention.

“Johnny Suh, I’ve waited a week as per the agreement. Now, get your uniform back on and meet me outside,” she said, and, without another word, turned to walk out of the locker room, everyone’s eyes followed her and her high heels. The second she was out the door, the whole team turned their gaze on Johnny, who immediately felt his spine lengthen.

“What?!”

“Where are you going?!”

“Are you being drafted by another team?!”

“No! Guys!” Johnny laughed as he pulled off his jersey he had just put on, “I’m auditioning for the music club. It’s no big deal,” he said, and the whole room seemed to let out a collective sigh. He quickly changed back into his uniform, buckling his belt as he started walking back to the locker room doors.

“Good luck!” Mark and Lucas called as he left, and he turned around and saluted them as he went.

He found Miss Kwon waiting right outside, as she said, and the two of them walked to the music and dance club on the other side of campus. She asked him how long he’d played, how many composers he knew, and how many he could play. Did he know how to read sheet music, did he know how to write his own music.

He could hear the music growing as they entered the fine arts wing of the campus, and Johnny’s heart fluttered as they walked passed an open studio door and he saw a ceramics and sculpting class going on.

There was a painting class, and figure drawing, and a ballet class with a small group of fit students in leotards doing barre work. They walked down to the end of the hall to an office door with four names on it; Miss Kwon’s, two names he didn’t recognize, and Lee Taeyong’s name as well. Johnny read Taeyong’s name three times and he finally realized that his teacher was a major part of the performing arts department.

Miss Kwon excused herself to her office for just a moment, and Johnny looked to the door adjacent and saw another dance studio and the source of the music. He peeked his head over to peer through the window, and he saw the students performing a hip-hop routine, all choreographed, all of them in near perfect sync. Johnny looked up to the front of the class and realized the instructor was Taeyong himself. Johnny’s mouth slacked and his eyes opened wide as he watched Taeyong move.

It was mesmerizing. He had a look on his face of full concentration, but his expression was only part of it. His moves were so powerful, and he danced with his whole body. He wasn’t just performing choreography. Down to his fingertips, he was feeling this music. He was a level above the students, and Johnny realized that it wasn’t out of place for him to be the dance club teacher at all.

It was almost like he was a different person; in class he was upstanding, well dressed, almost preened, but right now he looked like he could win an underground dance battle blindfolded.

Johnny was ripped away from the scene when the door to the office opened again, and Miss Kwon came out, holding her work tablet and a folder of sheet music.

“Were you watching the practice just now?” she asked with a knowing smile, and Johnny nodded, guiltily.

“I-I didn’t know Mr. Lee could dance…” Johnny murmured. She smiled.

“Yeah, he’s pretty good. Almost as good as me,” she boasted, and Johnny fought back a smile, “This way, over here,” she said, and they entered a room across from the dance practice room. It was a choir room, and it was absolutely silent in the hall before they opened the door and the chattering could be heard.

“Okay, okay!” Miss Kwon called as she walked into the room confidently, the class settling. Johnny took it in.

It was a small amphitheater shaped room, with ascending seats. At the bottom of the floor, right around the corner from the doorway, was a beautiful, dark wood, grand piano with the top up, and Johnny’s heart thumped as he looked at it. His fingers twitched at his sides.

“Class, I’m going to audition this student—”

“Hey, Johnny,” two voices chimed, and Johnny’s eyes snapped from the beautiful instrument to Doyoung and another student he was familiar with but wasn’t quite sure if they were friends yet, Moon Taeil.

“—So, everyone, get out. Go to Mr. Lee’s room for ten minutes,” Miss Kwon finished, and Johnny looked at her.

“Oh, I-I don’t care if they stay,” Johnny stammered, and the kids who were getting out of their seats stopped.

“You sure?” Miss Kwon asked, turning to him.

“Yeah, I don’t care. Honestly, the second we walked in I saw this piano and I just wanted to play,” he admitted, and she gestured him to the piano with a scoop of her arm.

Johnny popped his knuckles before he pulled out the bench. The piano was old. She had some scuff marks and notches in her, but that just gave her character to Johnny. He pressed a few keys, testing the sound on the pedals, and then ran through his scales once as quickly as he could. He cleared his throat and began playing ‘Clocks’ by Coldplay, his fingers playing out his beat, and he even managed to improvise a little.

Miss Kwon came up quietly and placed sheet music on the stand in front of his eyes, and he slowly trailed off Coldplay and then slipped right into the next piece. It was boring though, he wasn’t sure who wrote it, but it was rag-timey, like it belonged in a saloon.

“Not your flavor?” Miss Kwon asked. He shook his head and smiled but still flipped the page with hardly a break in his playing, “Okay, you choose one now,” she said.

Johnny smiled as he changed the tune and started flitting his fingers more gently over the keys, the class around him gasped and whispered as they recognized it as ‘Part of Your World’ from The Little Mermaid. Johnny felt his shoulders swaying as he played and after about two minutes, he got bored and changed the song again, having so much carefree fun as he slipped into a more complicated and classical piece. His fingers slammed the keys, the music flowed dramatically. He wanted to truly show off his talent today; he had an audience and a teacher to impress, and he hadn’t spent almost ten years learning this instrument to play it without some flare.

When he finished, the students all clapped, and Doyoung even stood up and whistled for him. Johnny smiled wide as he got up from the bench and bowed deeply before them.

Miss Kwon lead him out of the room again and into the office so that they could be alone. She praised him but then switched over into teacher mode and started pointing out things he could work on, and Johnny nodded, lapping it all up.

“When Basketball ends, we’ll start your lessons,” she said, “I like you, a lot. You play very, very well, and now I’m going to polish you. If you work hard, we could have you play at talent shows, music competitions, and other events where scouters will be there looking for talent. I can help you with my connections, and get you into any music school you wish,” she said, and Johnny’s attention was snapped into perspective.

“In Korea?” he asked breathlessly.

“Or Japan, or America. I know some people,” she said nonchalantly, “Take care of your hands. No broken fingers playing basketball, you hear me?” she said in that tone again, the one that was half threatening, and half caring. He nodded.

They shook hands, and she dismissed Johnny. He tried to take another peek at the hip-hop dancers once more as he left, but they were taking a break, and Johnny didn’t catch a glimpse of Taeyong. He left the art wing happy and with a spring in his step.

~

When Johnny got the text from his mom asking about the parent-teacher conference, Johnny’s heart sank to his feet. She had indeed gotten the email he was so worried about. He was sitting at his grandma’s dinner table with Mark and Lucas, the three of them studying for their Korean final coming up at the end of the week, and when he read the text he let out a groan.

“Yeah, I don’t think I really get it either…” Lucas grumbled as he looked down at his own homework.

“No, not that. My mom just found out about the parent-teacher conference next week,” he murmured, and his phone pinged again, “ugh, _great_ , she’s postponing her return to Chicago so she can go.”

“You’re _lucky_ your mom’s going. Both my parents can’t make it out here. I’m going with someone from my international family, and we’re going to try and put my mom on speakerphone,” Mark said, his eyes turned down.

“No, I’m _not_ lucky… my mother is not like other moms, she’s a handful, and likes to make things all about her. The last time I saw her, we had a huge fight,” Johnny murmured, “but… I’m sorry you’re not going to get to see your mom or dad. That must suck,” he said, sympathizing.

“ _It’s okay_ ,” Mark mumbled, but Johnny could see that he still felt gloomy about it.

“Do you want me to go to the conference with you both?” Johnny’s grandmother asked as she put a big plate of sliced fruit in front of them. Lucas and Mark instantly dropped their pencils in favor of snacks.

“That would be great. You could probably keep her in line better than I can,” Johnny laughed.

“Yeah, we’ll see about that,” she added.

~

The days leading up to the parent teacher conferences were blurry for Johnny. He knew he couldn’t stop the storm that was his mother, so he threw himself into studying for his weaker classes to try and boost his grades. The students of SIHS were buzzing with excitement and trepidation. There were only two emotions regarding the conferences. The students who got decent grades and weren’t behavior problems were going to have breezy conferences; the students who had less than stellar grades or had detention multiple times were worried about the impending wrath of their parents.

The parent/teacher conferences were going to be held Thursday and Friday on the third week of January. Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday were finals, so all the students could go home and have a relaxing four-day weekend before new school lessons started the following week.

It had been affectionately called ‘Hell-Week’ by all the students in the school, because having major back-to-back tests in every subject for a full week would stress anyone out.

Johnny was stressed for about ten other reasons besides finals. The conferences after that plagued his thoughts.

His mom was a wildcard. He didn’t know if she was going to be happy with his grades, he didn’t know if she was going to freak out about his solid ‘C’ in Korean, he didn’t know if she was even going to be sober for the event or not.

What he _did_ know was that the idea of him, his mom, his grandma, and his teacher all alone in the same room together for a half an hour was going to give him a panic attack.

He was preparing for the worst-case scenarios. His mother throwing a tantrum, his grandmother trying to defuse the situation, Taeyong getting a very up-close and personal view of his relationship with his mother… but the thing that terrified Johnny to the core, had him chewing the inside of his lip and giving him more fitful sleep than usual, was the idea of his mother noticing the peculiar relationship he had with his teacher.

His mom, while headstrong, stubborn, sloppy, and unprofessional… was unfortunately _not_ an idiot. He knew that if Johnny slipped up, even for just a moment— and his mother happened to notice —she would figure it out. She was his mother, he grew up with her, and she always knew when Johnny had feelings for someone.

Johnny wasn’t worried about Taeyong. His teacher was much better about keep his face unconcerned when it came to him and Johnny in the school setting. He knew that if his mother sniffed it out, it wouldn’t be Taeyong’s fault. The idea of his mom finding out about his feelings for his teacher, and what she might do, made him feel physically sick. She was known to overreact and explode.

Johnny tried to stay relaxed, tried not to think about it so much because in the end, Taeyong’s was right. There was absolutely nothing he could do to change what was going to happen on Thursday, the only thing he could do was study hard and pull some good grades on his final exams. Then they’d have some positive things to talk about for a half an hour while Johnny desperately tried to keep the conversation away from college.

Johnny found it easy to drown himself in studying, and everyday leading up to Wednesday was stressful. When he wasn’t in class, worrying about his mom and Mr. Lee, or at practice with his team, he was studying or helping someone else study.

He was actually kind of proud to look up at his group sitting in the stairwell and seeing everyone working on some homework or another, helping each other out in their weak points.

On Tuesday, after the final bell rang dismissing the students, Mr. Lee stopped to tell everyone to go home, eat a good meal, go get a good night’s rest, and wished them all good luck.

Johnny made sure he was the last person to leave the room so he could give Taeyong a long-lasting look as he walked out the door, hoping he could project his thoughts into his teacher’s mind and wish him good luck too. Taeyong nodded him out the door, and Johnny wished he could get a hug from him. A hug from Taeyong would be just about the only thing that would make him feel better right now.

~

On Wednesday morning, Johnny woke up and got ready for school, and he slipped the oversized tee-shirt he had worn to bed that week into his bag to conveniently leave on his desk for Taeyong when classes ended. He went down the stairs and found his grandma making breakfast, as usual, but today she had a facemask on.

“Are you okay?” he immediately asked her and walked up to his grandma to feel her forehead. It was cold in the house, but she didn’t feel too warm to him.

“I’m okay,” she said, but her voice came out like a croak. She cleared her throat, “I took some medicine, I’m about to have breakfast and tea. Don’t worry about me, go eat and then go take your last tests,” she cooed, “I’ll be fine by tomorrow,” she promised.

Johnny left the house worried about her and sent a text to his aunt asking her to check up on his grandma during the day.

When he got to the school, his grandma had to be pushed out of his mind because he had three tests that day alone, and then the next day was Johnny’s conference at 11 in the morning.

He entered his last Korean class with heavy feet and a fried brain. Everyone else looked that way too. Taeyong had held their final on Monday, so they had been having relaxing classes. They voted on a movie, and Taeyong put on the Korean dub of The Lion King.

Johnny may have fallen asleep on his desk because he heard the bell and then felt Mark nudging his shoulder.

“ _Hey man_ , I think some of the basketball team are going out for ramen, _you down_?” he asked. Johnny lifted his head all the way and felt his sleep deprived brain work double time to figure out what Mark said because he wasn’t able to handle both English and Korean at once.

“ _Huh_?” he asked lamely.

“ _Food. Ramen. Noodles. Becoming fat boys_ ,” Lucas articulated in his English, and Johnny nodded once.

“Yes. Food. Let’s do that,” he groaned and got out of his seat, his back feeling stiff from his nap. He touched his bag and realized he had a shirt for Taeyong in there, and he stilled, “Shit, go ahead and go find the team, I’ll catch up in a minute,” Johnny sighed, “I have to ask Mr. Lee some stuff before the conferences tomorrow.”

Mark and Lucas agreed and gave him both brotherly high-fives before they left. Johnny felt sluggish as he waited for every other student to leave. Taeyong must have expected it by now because he merely smiled softly at Johnny as he walked up to the front of the class.

“Have a good nap?” Taeyong asked jokingly, and Johnny yawned, covering his mouth.

“Not really,” he sighed, “My mom is coming to the conference tomorrow. I just wanted to… warn you.”

“What’s the worst that could happen?” Taeyong asked, “Actually, don’t answer that,” he added with that same comforting smile on his face, “It’s going to be fine, Johnny.”

The student’s heart fluttered. Taeyong had been using his preferred name in private recently, and it made Johnny’s own smile form too. He opened his bag and reached into it for the tee-shirt.

Taeyong had been leaving his jackets or sweaters back on his desk, but a shirt would have to be concealed a little better. A shirt laying around arouses more questions than a jacket.

“You can just leave it inside my desk on Monday,” Johnny murmured and set the folded shirt on Taeyong’s desk.

“I feel dirty… like this is some sort of drug deal or something,” Taeyong mused, but he still reached for the shirt and slipped it into his briefcase, “but… it does work, so who am I to complain?” he asked himself.

Johnny stared at him for a moment, and the urge to embrace the other overwhelmed him again. Johnny swallowed before he turned his feet towards the door.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Johnny murmured, “Drive safe.”

“You be safe too,” Taeyong said, “Tomorrow will be over before you know it,” his teacher added, and Johnny nodded before forcing himself to leave the room before his friends and teammates noticed his absence.

~

On Thursday morning, Johnny woke up to a sound that made him roll over and groan in annoyance. He could hear his mother from down the stairs talking with his grandmother, and he grabbed his phone and checked the time. It was just after eight in the morning.

He laid in bed for about fifteen minutes before he rolled out of it begrudgingly. He put on a pair of pajama pants and a sweatshirt before he made his way down the stairs. Their conversation quieted as Johnny came down the last few steps and rounded the corner into the kitchen.

Something smelled off when he entered the room ,and it wasn’t the scent of his mother.

“Hey, mom,” he greeted quietly; he had decided yesterday to make this visit as peaceful as possible even though he knew he was going to hate every second of it.

“Good morning, Son,” she said fondly. He looked at her for a moment and then looked at his grandma and frowned.

“Are you still not feeling well, Grandma?” he asked and walked over to her. She was sitting at the table with a steaming mug of tea in front of her, a blanket around her shoulders, and another white facemask on. She nodded slowly.

“I’m trying to convince her to go to the hospital,” Johnny’s mom grumbled. Johnny put his hand to his grandma’s forehead like yesterday, and this time she did feel warm.

“You should go see the doctor, you feel like you have a fever,” Johnny said. His grandma let out a long sigh, and Johnny could hear the work her lungs were taking just to breathe deeply. She looked up at him, and he could see the sorrow in her eyes.

“If I go to the doctor,” she stopped to breath in, “I’ll miss your appointment with your teacher,” she wheezed.

“That’s fine,” Johnny said softly, although he already felt his heart sinking, “It doesn’t matter, you should go find out what this is and get antibiotics for it. I would rather you be taking care of yourself than sitting in a classroom listening to my teacher talk about my grades,” he comforted her with a hand on her shoulder, “we can call Auntie, and she can take you,” he said and nodded to his mother who nodded back and pulled out her phone. She got up and wandered into the living room to make the call. Johnny’s grandma tugged his hand and made him sit at the table with her.

“I talked with your mother,” she started, “I told her to be on her best behavior today,” she said and stopped to take in another breath, this time she coughed afterwards. It sounded awful and gravely in her throat, and Johnny winced for her.

“Thank you for that,” Johnny murmured.

“She also wants… to take you out for breakfast,” she added. Johnny nodded, thinking she would do something like that.

Johnny’s mom came back in a minute later and announced that her sister was coming to pick up their mom. Johnny stood up and asked his mother to go get his grandma some appropriate clothes for the cold weather, and she agreed.

“Oh, and John-ah,” she said, “We’re going to go get breakfast, so you should also wear something warm and appropriate.”

Johnny nodded and announced that he was going to take a quick shower before he left the kitchen to go back up to his room. He showered, blow dried his hair quickly and sprayed himself with a light cologne. His hair was parted nicely, he wanted to look crisp and fresh.

He would have agonized over what he was going to wear if he hadn’t chosen his outfit the night before. A white turtleneck and white shoes, his nicest pair of jeans, and a black, red, and white flannel over it that was insulated well and served as his jacket.

He wandered back downstairs with his shoes in his hand, his long socks up under his jeans, and he waited in the living room with his mom and grandma before his aunt showed up.

As soon as his grandma was on the way to the doctor, Johnny’s mom called a taxi for the two of them, and thus started the beginning of Johnny’s agonizing day hanging out with his mother.

She had on an all-black ensemble with knee-high heeled boots and a cheetah print scarf. He didn’t really know if she was trying to go for a younger look with the scarf, but it wasn’t how it came off. She looked like she was trying too hard. Her makeup looked fine, but he could tell she was trying to cover up wrinkles that just wouldn’t disappear.

They got to the restaurant, and Johnny opened the menu to see what would be good.

“Do you want a mimosa?” his mother asked, and Johnny’s eyes flicked up over the laminate menu to give her a glare.

“It’s _nine_ in the morning,” he said.

“Yes, it’s a breakfast cocktail, with orange juice,” she reasoned, “Your birthday is in two weeks, anyway. I bet they wouldn’t even check your ID,” she smiled. Johnny’s eyes narrowed, but she didn’t back down from his gaze.

“I’m going to have _one_ ,” she stressed and rolled her eyes, “would you like to have one with me? I’m buying, and neither of us are driving” she said.

Johnny shut his eyes and fought back an argument, but then he shrugged, not really feeling a fight in him today. If he started off breakfast on the wrong foot, the whole day would be rocky, and he didn’t have his grandma to play referee.

“You know what, _sure_ . If they don’t card me, why not? But just _one_ ,” Johnny said and pointed at her icily, “I really respect my teacher and you will _not_ embarrass me by being drunk in front of him.”

“ _Fine_ ,” she hissed back, and Johnny thought he caught her murmuring something like ‘ _killjoy’_ under her breath, but he chose to ignore it.

The waiter came by, and they both ordered from the breakfast menu. His mom ordered them both a mimosa, and he didn’t ask for either of their ID’s, which Johnny was surprised over. He added to bring them both glasses of water too before he could depart, and Johnny’s mom shot him a grin as he left.

“ _See_?” she beamed, “You look older than your age. Just like your father. I bet he thought we were a couple.”

“Gross, mom,” Johnny grimaced, “I don’t care what he thought.”

The meal was as pleasant as it could be. Johnny enjoyed the food and sipped at his mimosa. The champagne in it was actually quite sharp and refreshing with the orange juice. His mother drank her whole drink before eating, and Johnny shook his head softly as she tipped her glass back.

“I might get one more…” she mused as she made her way halfway through her breakfast.

“ _No_ ,” Johnny growled, “You’re cut off. We’re going to a parent-teacher conference, remember? Will you _please_ act like a parent?” he stressed. She set down her fork and folded her hands in her lap.

“You really hate me, don’t you?” she asked quietly, and Johnny felt the biggest eye-roll he could muster make its way onto his face. He dropped his fork to his plate with a clatter.

“ _No_ , mom. I don’t _hate_ you. I just hate when you act like this.”

“Like _what_?” she challenged.

“Like an _alcoholic_ ,” he hissed lowly and looked to the table next to them to make sure that other patrons weren’t listening to them argue, “ _C’mon_ ,” he said, putting on a more pleading tone, “I just want this day to go as normal as possible. I don’t want to fight with you,” he said, trying to defuse the situation. His mom let out a big sigh after a long moment of silence.

“I know. You don’t want your mother to embarrass you. I’m sorry,” she reiterated looking down at her plate, but it still sounded like ‘ _oh-pity-me’_.

Johnny looked down at his mostly eaten plate, but honestly his heart wasn’t in it anymore. He quickly cleared his breakfast plate and then sat back and pulled out his phone to check the time.

“The conference is in a half hour,” he informed her.

“Okay, I’ll get the bill,” she said quietly.

~

The school was so weird to be in today. There were only a handful of students walking in and out of the school with their families with them, making the halls relatively quiet and uncrowded. There were chairs placed outside of every classroom so people could sit and wait for their turn. Johnny and his mom showed up with about five minutes to spare, and they sat outside the door together. Johnny’s knee was bouncing and his stomach twisted. He wondered if it was the champagne or if it was his own nerves.

“Is there anything you want to tell me before we go in?” his mother asked him, her purse in her lap and her legs crossed. Johnny shook his head, “so you’re getting straight A’s then?” she asked. Johnny shook his head again, this time looking at her.

“I’m doing great in some classes and not as great in others,” he murmured, and she frowned.

“I thought this school was prestigious,” she scoffed, and Johnny narrowed his eyes.

“It _is_ ,” he growled, “The school is fine, Mom. My grades are also fine. Stop nitpicking,” he said.

“You won’t be accepted to med school with C’s on your transcripts, is all I’m saying,” she said loftily and took out her phone.

“Is there something _you_ want to say to me before we go in?” Johnny hissed, letting her know that comments like that still pissed him off.

“Nope,” she said and turned her nose back to her phone. Johnny sucked in a deep breath and counted to five in his head. He was going to take another breath and make it to ten but the classroom door opened.

Johnny looked up and saw Ten walking out with a smile on his face and two women behind him. Johnny looked at them and guessed that they were his mother and sister.

“Hi, Johnny!” Ten chirped, and Johnny stood up to greet him, a smile surfacing at seeing a friendly face. Ten pulled him into a hug, and Johnny returned it, “This is my mom and sister,” he introduced, and Johnny bowed and shook their hands.

“This is my mother,” Johnny said, and Ten gave him a swift look before greeting his mother with a charming smile, as he effortlessly does.

“I’m going to give them a tour of Seoul today,” Ten said, “I’ll see you later?” he asked.

“Yeah, have a nice time,” Johnny said, and they parted ways, Ten holding his sister’s hand affectionately.

“He was cute,” Johnny’s mom whispered before they walked in.

“He has a boyfriend, mom,” Johnny smirked at her, and she pouted.

“Too bad. He looked like he liked you,” she said.

Johnny steeled himself for walking into his classroom, and today as Taeyong’s scent billowed over him, it did not make him feel as comforting as it usually did. The student’s desks were pushed back a few feet and three chairs were placed at the edge of the teacher’s desk so they could sit around together. There was a plate of cookies on the corner of Taeyong’s desk, and he stood to greet them and bowed respectfully to Johnny’s mother.

His mother did the same, and Johnny felt a spark of foreboding when his mother hesitated to shake Mr. Lee’s hand.

“Good morning,” his teacher greeted. Taeyong was wearing a very smart and sleek black suit with a button up and tie. His blonde hair was parted and neatly combed up and back, making him look sophisticated and older than he really was, “if you’d like a cookie, please help yourself.”

“No, thank you,” Johnny’s mom said, and she took her seat. Johnny sat too, steeling himself for the worst.

“Before we look into Youngho’s file,” Taeyong started as he took a seat, “His basketball coach and piano teacher mentioned visiting us for the conference today.” Johnny blinked.

“Oh?” his mother asked, then turned to look at Johnny, “Piano teacher?” she questioned.

“I forgot to tell you,” Johnny said, even though he really meant to withhold this information from her, “I auditioned for the piano teacher on campus. I’m going to be a part of the band, or rather, _orchestra_ , after basketball ends in a couple weeks.”

Johnny’s mother pursed her lips.

“Do not tell me you’re still serious about your silly music dream,” she said in a warning tone. Johnny didn’t look at her when he shrugged.

“Well… the music teacher said I had lots of potential, and that she had connections with other prestigious music schools across multiple countries. If I work hard, I could go anywhere in America or Asia,” he said like it was nothing— nonchalant —although this kind of opportunity was huge for Johnny, who had dreamed of being a musician since he was eight.

His mother laughed, and Johnny bristled.

“I’m glad you like to play music, but it’s not a viable career. You’re going to be a doctor, or if your father has his way, a lawyer.”

“Oh, speaking of your father…” Mr. Lee cut in, and both mother and son looked up at the teacher, “I received and email from him yesterday saying he would like to join in on this meeting via conference call,” he said.

Johnny’s eyes snapped to the clock above the door, and his anxiety doubled as he did the time zone math in his head.

“ _Oh, God_ ,” Johnny’s mouth dropped, “he just got off work, didn’t he?” Johnny whispered.

“That’s _perfect_ ,” Johnny’s mom chirped, and Johnny’s whole face twisted in discomfort at the idea. He looked up at his teacher, looking for solace, but Taeyong couldn’t give it to him right then. The teacher pulled the wired phone at his desk close to him and typed in the long, eleven-digit number he had written down on a sticky note in front of him. He put the phone on speaker, and Johnny wished with all his heart, if there was a God, he would make sure that Johnny’s father did _not_ pick up the phone.

There was a click and then Johnny’s dad’s voice came over the room digitally, and all of Johnny’s hope for a calm parent-teacher conference left the building.

“ _Hello?_ ” he asked in Korean and Taeyong greeted back.

“Hello, this is Lee Taeyong calling from Seoul International High School. I’m your son’s homeroom teacher. How are you today?” Taeyong asked.

“ _I’m doing very well, thank you_.”

“Hey, Dad,” Johnny said, trying not to sound as over it as he already was.

“Hello, Jungwon,” Johnny’s mom said, touching her hair although he couldn’t see her, and Johnny rolled his eyes again.

“ _Hello, Minyoung_ ,” he greeted back, but Johnny could hear the slight annoyance in his voice too at addressing his ex-wife.

“Welcome to the parent-teacher conference, everyone. It’s a pleasure to speak with all of you. Let me start off by saying Youngho is one of my brightest pupils,” Taeyong said and looked at Johnny with a hint of pride in his eyes, “He’s worked very, _very_ hard to keep his grades up to par with our standards here at Seoul International, and he’s a great model to the other students who will be learning English the second half of this year,” he said, and Johnny felt a small glow of pride swell within him.

“ _That’s my boy_ ,” Johnny’s Dad’s voice said, and Johnny’s head reeled at the compliment.

“His basketball coach and music teacher will be joining us in the second half of the conference,” Taeyong started, but his father cut him off.

“ _Music teacher?_ ” he asked with disdain, and Johnny’s small bit of growing pride disappeared as quickly as it arrived.

“That’s what I said,” his mother added snootily, and Johnny felt his lip twitch.

“ _You don’t need to waste your time with music, son,”_ his father said _, “You should be on the debate team, like your father,”_ Johnny let out a long sigh.

“Yeah, but… I would rather play the piano than talk about subjects that I hate. And my teacher said I have a lot of potential to maybe—”

“ _I don’t want to hear it right now_ ,” his father said, shutting him down, and Johnny’s eyes flicked up to Taeyong’s who caught his gaze for a half second, “ _Let’s hear about those grades_.”

Taeyong took his time, going over each of Johnny’s subjects and pulling out breakdowns of all his classes on printed sheets of paper. He even went over all of the grades he got on every final he had taken over the past week. Johnny could tell Taeyong was stalling to fill up their half hour time slot, going over every detail of his grades and classes slowly and with conviction to extend their time.

“—Youngho, you actually did so well on your Korean final, you pulled your grade from a high ‘C’ to a solid ‘B’! All the studying you’ve done really paid off. Youngho was struggling with the reading and writing Hangul at the beginning of the year, but he has certainly pulled himself around.”

“It’s true,” his mother sighed, “we brought John-ah up bilingual, but we didn’t teach him to read Hangul because we didn’t think he’d need it in his lifetime.”

“ _Well, he still doesn’t need it,_ ” His father interjected, “ _When you move back to America with me, you’ll have no use for writing in Korean.”_

Johnny looked up to see Taeyong’s reaction, and Mr. Lee was looking at the phone, mildly offended.

“And what if… I don’t want to go back to America?” Johnny asked.

“ _Well, of course you do_ ,” his father said with a laugh, “ _You’re going to come home after you get sick of the city, and you’ll see how wonderful your life is going to be when you start your paid internship at my firm over the summer_ ,” he said pompously. Johnny gritted his teeth.

“Dad. I don’t want to be a lawyer. I don’t want to be a doctor either,” he said and turned to his mother, “I don’t want to go back to Chicago. I want to stay here in Seoul, and see what this music career can offer me.”

“ _You can’t do anything with a degree in music, John_.”

“I could _teach_ ,” Johnny shot, “maybe I want to be a music teacher in the future.”

“You won’t make enough money to support yourself and m—” Johnny’s mom started

“Don’t you _dare_ say it,” Johnny growled, and his mother instantly growled back.

“ _Don’t you talk to me like that, John Suh_ ,” she snarled in English, her eyes turning bright scarlet and using Johnny’s birth name with no friendly suffix. Johnny let his eyes switch over in response, red challenging red.

“Then _don’t_ assume I’m going to take care of you. Whatever job I _do_ get, you’re going to bankrupt me with your alcohol bill and drag us both down. I’m _not_ going to take care of you and I _won’t_ enable you.”

“ _Oh, she’s still drinking, is she_?” Johnny’s dad asked over the phone, and Johnny saw his mother’s lip curl just like his did when she was on the verge of pissed off.

“She can’t stop, Dad. That’s what being an _alcoholic_ means,” he spat, knowing right then that he crossed a line. His mother stood up from her seat, and Johnny saw it coming a second before he could stop it.

She raised her hand back and slapped him, _hard_.

Johnny was dazed, but memories of the worst parts of his childhood surfaced all at once. It had been a _long_ time since his mother had physically hit him, almost five years. He recalled memories of late nights in a dirty apartment kitchen, long distant memories of fighting from down the hall, the sounds permeating through closed doors.

Johnny’s mother grabbed her purse, stepped around Johnny, grabbed the phone on Taeyong’s desk and slammed it down on the receiver, effectively hanging up the phone call with his father.

“How dare you embarrass me like this!?” she bellowed down at her son, and Johnny did nothing to fight back, had nothing to say in response, “And you had the _audacity_ to lecture me this morning,” she snarled deeply then stalked out of the room, the sound of her cheap boots applauding her out.

Taeyong’s eyes were wide, and he had his hands over his mouth as it happened. He jumped in his seat, his heart hammering, when she slammed the phone down and walked out. She left the classroom door open, and Taeyong looked up to see Miss Kwon and the basketball coach both standing there, frozen as the parent stormed out of the room. Taeyong shook his head at them and pointed away, mouthing ‘go’ at them. Miss Kwon nodded and shut the classroom door.

There was a moment of silence, and Johnny turned his face down, not wanting to look at Taeyong. His cheek stung, and Johnny was slightly thankful she didn’t have a ring on her finger like the last time he was slapped by his mother. He swallowed thickly, and he felt tears being to build in his eyes.

Taeyong stood up, his chair scraping the linoleum floor, and he unbuttoned his coat jacket as he approached Johnny.

“I’m so sorry,” Taeyong whispered, and Johnny wasn’t forced to look at him as Taeyong took his shoulders and pulled Johnny’s upper half into his embrace as the wounded alpha remained in the chair. Johnny’s emotions hit him all at once, and a lump formed in his throat as Taeyong’s shaking hand threaded into his hair and held him comfortingly, “it’s going to be okay, Johnny.”

The student squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his face into his teacher’s ribs, and Johnny raised his arms to hold him back firmly. His arms wrapped around that slender little waist and felt Taeyong’s whole body shake from the adrenaline of the event.

“It’s over now,” Taeyong whispered to both him and Johnny as his hands squeezed his student closer, and Johnny couldn’t keep it together anymore. It was the most cathartic feeling, to be so close to his teacher’s scent and deep in his embrace as his cheek stung, and his sobs rolled through him.

He wished he could change his family, but he couldn’t. He wished he could change himself, but he couldn’t. There was nothing he could do to control the negative things in his life. The only thing he could control was how he handled them.

Johnny knew this moment couldn’t last long, and he pulled himself together after a long few moments of savoring the comfort he felt right there in those arms. He raised his head and wiped his eyes on his sleeve instead of into Taeyong’s shirt. The hand left his hair, and Johnny felt Taeyong’s gentle fingers take his chin and raise his face to look at him.

Johnny’s eyes met Taeyong’s concerned ones as the omega took the seat his mother previously occupied. Their knees touched, and Johnny sniffed and looked up at Taeyong, his nose stuffy and a headache forming from crying.

“It’s not that bad,” Taeyong cooed, referring to his warm cheek, “You tried to warn me yesterday... I didn’t think anything like this was going to happen,” he murmured, and Taeyong’s soft hand curled into the side of his face that hadn’t been hit. Johnny felt like being slapped by his mother was almost worth it as he leaned his head into Taeyong’s palm.

“Yeah. She’s a real piece of work… hits her son and she wonders why her family pushes her away,” he murmured, and Taeyong’s eyebrows pinched up.

“I’m proud of you for standing up to them. I’ve had three students already today that quieted down when their parents were making their decisions for them,” Taeyong shared, and Johnny smirked with a humorless laugh.

“Yeah well, both my parents are alphas, so that made me extra headstrong.”

“You’re not like them,” Taeyong said, and Johnny felt a wave of validation and adoration crash through him. He smiled softly at his teacher, his cheek hurt when he did it, but it was worth it.

“Thanks, Mr. Lee,” Johnny sniffed again and let out a short sigh as he blinked and shook his head to clear it, “I should go track her down now,” he whispered. Taeyong nodded and let go of his face. Johnny couldn’t linger any longer, he looked up at the clock and saw that his half hour was up. The next student and their family was probably waiting outside.

He swallowed thickly, wishing he had worn a jacket with a hood so he could partially cover his swollen face.

“Johnny,” Taeyong called softly as he buttoned his coat back up, hiding the small patches where Johnny’s tears soaked into his shirt, “please, take care,” his teacher warned him, and Johnny nodded.

“You too,” he said and left the room. He didn’t look at the student and her family waiting outside the door, instead he walked around the corner and saw his mother sitting on a bench a few doors down. He felt disgusted as he noticed the silver travel flask in her hand. She spotted her son and tipped the metal flask back to her mouth and downed the rest of its contents.

“ _Real nice_ ,” Johnny spat.

“ _Shut up_ ,” his mother countered, she sounded like a middle schooler. She stood up and screwed the cap back onto her flask before slipping it into her purse where she probably produced it from, “ _I was going to go back to grandma’s for dinner, but she’s still at the hospital. I’m going back to my hotel, and I’m going home tomorrow,_ ” she informed.

“ _Good. Leave_ ,” he growled, and her eyes switched back to red again, but she said nothing.

The ride back in the taxi was thick with unsaid anger, and neither them nor the driver said a word the whole way. As they pulled up to his grandmother’s house, Johnny got out of the car, and before he could shut the door, his mother called to him.

“ _You are an ungrateful son_ ,” she just had to add.

“ _Then you should have had more kids. Maybe then you could have had one that would be happy throwing their life away for you,”_ Johnny hissed, about to shut the door before he added, _“Actually, I’m glad you didn’t have any more children. No other child should have to put up with your shit like I do. Have a nice flight_ ,” he finished and shut the car door on her. He tipped the driver with money from his own wallet, giving him an apologetic look even though he was still blazing with fury inside. The taxi pulled away, and Johnny walked up to the front door of his house, still simmering but thankful that the terrible ordeal was over.

He unlocked the door of his empty house and went to the kitchen to get something cold from the freezer to hold against his cheek.

He sent a few texts on his phone, and one more thank-you and apology email to Taeyong, before he wandered up to his room and crashed into his bed, fully clothed, to take a nap and check out from this awful day.

Johnny wished in the back of his mind that he would wake up, and this would have all been a terrible dream, but he knew that was too good to be true.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh heeeeeeey, I'm not dead, and vacation was good.  
> Also I'm sorry?  
> -Copper


	9. Valentines Sickness

Johnny watched Jaehyun walk up to his desk with a playful smile and a giftbag in his hand, and it made Johnny’s lips twitch into a smile as well.

“Happy birthday,” Jaehyun said the moment he got up to Johnny’s desk and he set the small giftbag with blue tissue paper in front of his best friend. Johnny saw the silly balloons all over the bag and looked up at Jaehyun with an amused look.

Johnny was trying not to think about turning twenty years old and still being a high school senior, but he couldn’t lie to himself, he loved his birthday.

“ _ Aww, thanks, Jeffrey _ ,” Johnny said gratefully, using Jaehyun’s outdated English nickname, “You know you didn’t have to get me anything,” he said and Jaehyun wrinkled his nose at him.

“Shut up and open it,” he said, “It’s the best gift you’ll ever get.”

“The  _ best _ gift?” Johnny asked as he tore open the tissue paper with a giddy feeling in his heart. Inside the bag was a large coffee mug, so large he could fit soup in it. The mug was white ceramic and inside was a bag of mini Reese’s peanut butter cups, one of the only candies Johnny truly liked. Johnny cooed and turned the mug around in his hand and on the flip side of it, it had a glossy printed picture of Jaehyun’s smiling face, dimples and all.

The second Johnny laid his eyes on it, he brought his hand up to his face and started laughing. Jaehyun started laughing too, his shoulders shaking as he tried to keep his composure.

“Yeah, I mean, like…” Jaehyun started and Johnny had to set the mug down on his desk and shut his eyes to keep his laughter in, “I feel like you need more of  _ me _ in your life. A reminder. And like, what’s better than a coffee cup with my face on it? Literally,  _ nothing _ ,” Jaehyun made out through laughter, and Johnny couldn’t handle how absurd it was.

He fell out of his seat and onto the floor, laughing and covering his face. A few other students came over to check on him and Johnny started moaning with how ridiculous this mug was. His cheeks started to hurt and Jaehyun started doubling over too at Johnny’s reaction.

It had been a hard last few weeks for Johnny, but this gift really helped him feel better about the shit going on with him right now.

He sat up again, wiping his eyes and he sat back in his seat but was faced again with the Jaehyun mug and he tipped his head back fully and laughed again, deep from his belly.

“It’s great, isn’t it?” Jaehyun laughed, “You love it, don’t you?”

“Jesus Christ,” Johnny wheezed, “yeah man, it’s great. I’m gonna fill it with cereal first thing when I get home.”

“That’s what I want to hear,” Jaehyun beamed, “It’ll be best the birthday gift you’ll ever receive.”

“Birthday gift?” asked the familiar voice and Johnny looked up to see Mr. Lee.

Taeyong had wandered over to the back of the classroom to see what all the fuss was about. They still had a few minutes before the bell rang and Johnny turned the mug around to show their teacher Jaehyun’s silly mug.

“Jaehyun got me a coffee cup with his face on it for my birthday. Honestly, it’s classic,” Johnny snickered, and had to keep his eyes from lingering too much on Taeyong’s face.

“It’s your birthday?” Taeyong asked looking directly at Johnny. Johnny nodded, hearing the slight strain in Taeyong’s voice, like he was caught off guard with this information.

“Yeah,” he said with a smile, “but don’t ask me how old I am, because I’m embarrassed,” he added and the students around him either laughed or immediately started asking him how old he was and why he would possibly feel awkward or embarrassed.

“Alright, students. Wrap this up, and let’s get to our seats,” Taeyong said teacherly. The students drifted away from the birthday boy and Taeyong put his finger on the edge of Johnny’s desk for a brief moment, “Happy birthday, Youngho,” he murmured with a little smile and Johnny smiled back, thanking him, his heart filling up a little bit more. He knew Taeyong wouldn’t and  _ couldn’t _ get him anything for his birthday, that would be crossing so many lines as teacher and student, so just hearing his teacher’s words were enough to make him feel special.

The day continued, a few more of his friends came and got him little gifts, and a small gaggle of omega girls all mustered up the courage and brought Johnny a huge plate of cookies at lunch. They told him that it was from his fanclub and that they wished him good luck on their final basketball game in two weeks. Johnny was speechless, he hadn’t realized that he had a fanclub growing from being a tall alpha on the team, and he accepted the plate of sweets sheepishly and gratefully.

Unable to consume that many cookies, Johnny shared them with his friends and others later in the classroom. Taeyong’s eyes lit up when Johnny offered him the large tray of sweets and he grinned up at Johnny playfully for a split second.

“People are supposed to get  _ you  _ gifts today, not the other way around,” his teacher said as he picked up a chocolate chip cookie from the top of the plate.

“Honestly, I couldn’t eat all these cookies if I tried. You’d be doing me a favor by helping me eat them,” Johnny said, and Taeyong grinned and swiftly took a second cookie from the plate.

“Wow, I guess my hands are tied. Okay, but only because this is me doing you a favor. I wouldn’t help you unless you really needed it,” Taeyong joked, acting like he didn’t want both cookies to begin with, and Johnny turned away with a huge grin on his face, allowing it to show because it was his birthday and he was allowed to be overly happy that his teacher could joke with him today.

~

The next day was uneventful, bordering on boring. The class was finishing up the last section of Korean poetry this week and would move onto English comprehension the next week. Mr. Lee went over a brief outline of how the rest of the school year was going to go, and what books they were going to read together.

Evening classes for the week had become extended study time as the conferences ended and the new classes were being established. Most of the upperclassmen had clearance to go home early just for this week, and Johnny was torn about taking advantage of that time. He wanted to see more of Taeyong, but he also knew it would be weird to be the only person staying back in an empty class to do homework while all of his other friends took advantage of the privilege to leave school while the sun was still up.

Johnny didn’t know what was happening with the other students’ classes, but he knew his evening classes were going to be his private piano lessons, as Miss Kwon had reminded him four times already. He was very excited for the next week to start so he could spend hours a day, one-on-one, focusing on the piano, a lifelong dream of being a professional pianist still tickling in the back of his mind as more than just a fantasy.

As the bell rang for lunch, and Johnny got up with the rest of the students, Mr. Lee stopped him.

“Seo Youngho,” he called and waved his hand for Johnny to come to his desk, and when Johnny got within five feet of Taeyong’s desk, he said, “I have a matter to discuss with you involving the school’s dress code.”

Johnny felt shocked and he looked down at his uniform. His blazer was buttoned, his shirt was tucked, his tie was done… what was the issue?

A few of the other students murmured questions as they walked out, also checking their own uniforms to see if they were up to protocol and as soon as Johnny and Taeyong were alone and the door clicked shut, Taeyong pushed a piece of paper across the desk to face Johnny. While the student’s eyes scanned the paper quickly, his teacher sneakily reached into his bag behind his desk.

“The school now prohibits… dangling earrings?” Johnny asked, bewildered.

“You are correct,” Taeyong said and placed a small wrapped box on the desk in front of them. Johnny’s eyes zeroed in on it and he sucked in a surprised breath. It was wrapped in light green paper with a silver ribbon.

“Happy belated birthday, Johnny,” Taeyong wished quietly, and Johnny’s jaw dropped in surprise, “If I had known before, I would have had something prepared this weekend, so I could give it to you on the day.”

“Th-Thank you! C-can I open it?” Johnny stuttered, and Taeyong nodded with a fond smile.

“Please,” he said and Johnny immediately pulled the bow loose and set the ribbon aside. The box felt weighty, even for being so little, and Johnny took off the lid and found tissue paper. He picked the object up and tore off the paper to reveal a small silver trinket box.

It looked antique and recently polished, with swirling filigree and a lovely cursive ‘J’ on the front. The bottom of the box had four tiny feet and could fit perfectly in Johnny’s outstretched palm. Johnny stopped breathing as he ran his thumb over the beautiful box.

“I found that in an antique shop by my house a long time ago, and every time I walked by it, I saw it in the window. When I met you, I saw it and thought of you. I finally bought it on my way home from work yesterday,” Taeyong murmured, and Johnny looked up at him, still stunned, “there’s more. Open it,” Taeyong encouraged and Johnny’s fingers delicately pulled the lid of the box open. Inside was a pair of white jeweled earrings. A lovely pair of studs. Johnny couldn’t tell if they were diamond, but his heart didn’t care.

It was perfect.

“Now, you can wear those and you can still be within dress code,” he teacher said, Johnny set the box down on his teacher’s desk delicately and reached up to take off the dangling wing on his left ear. He wore that earring often, it was the ones he bought that one day he met Taeyong outside of school by accident, and they had kabobs and went to the bookstore. He dropped his earring into the jewelry box and picked up the studs, placing one in his ear immediately.

“Thank you, Mr. Lee,” Johnny said sincerely, “I think this is the best gift I’ve gotten this year,” he said with a sniff, feeling emotional tears coming on.

“Oh no, don’t cry, because then you’ll make  _ me _ cry,” Taeyong said with his own sniff and a smile.

“I-I should get the other one pierced, so I can wear them both,” Johnny said, touching the lobe of his unpierced ear.

“Don’t,” Taeyong said, “I mean… do it only if you want to, don’t do it for me,” Taeyong added, “I think you look very… striking with one ear piercing.”

Johnny looked at Taeyong’s ears and saw an empty lobe piercing.

“You have your ears pierced too?” Johnny asked, and Taeyong touched his own ears with a sheepish smile.

“Yes, and a helix on my right ear,” he said and touched the cartilage of his upper ear, “I can’t wear them at work though,” he said with a sigh. There was a moment of silence and Johnny shut the box lid, keeping his original dangling earring and the other stud in the box for safekeeping, making a plan to put all of his earrings in the velvet lined box as soon as he got home.

“When… when is your birthday?” Johnny asked quietly.

“Summer,” Taeyong answered, “You shouldn’t worry about that though. Go have a nice lunch and a successful practice,” he said and Johnny nodded. He put the jewelry box back in its packaging and took the precious birthday gift back to his desk to tuck safely away in his backpack.

Before Johnny left the room, he thanked Taeyong one more time, and Taeyong smiled, one of those rare beams that made Johnny’s hope and feelings rise up.

“You’re so welcome,” Taeyong said, and Johnny was grinning from ear to ear as he left the room.

~

The rest of the week was a flurry of Valentine’s whispers. Couples were being more affectionate in the halls than usual, and the teachers themselves seemed too occupied to notice. Some students were decorating the outside of their lockers with sticky note hearts and pink tinsel. The giggles and romance were heavy in the air.

The pairs in Johnny’s friend group were all making plans. Doyoung and Jaehyun, Sicheng and Yuta, Lucas and Ten, even Mark was being hassled by Haechan to do something cute for the day.

Johnny loved Valentine’s day, or to be more accurate, Johnny loved love. He usually had a Valentine, in fact, he couldn’t remember not having one. There was usually a crush, a flavor of the season, which Johnny would fawn over for Valentine’s day. He liked to go all out; handmade card, roses, chocolate, a date at any restaurant he could afford at the time, maybe a movie, and late-night fun if it wasn’t a weeknight.

This was the first year since he was about nine years old that Johnny was going stag for Valentines day. He felt weird, leading someone on when his heart was being pulled away to someone else. There were a good handful of other students who approached him and asked him to be their Valentine before the day, and Johnny had to learn how to politely refuse them, without it feeling like a total rejection.

He didn’t think he’d ever get good at it.

On Valentines day, Johnny’s only priority was making sure he got Jaehyun a birthday gift as equally funny as the one the beta got him last week, but he figured it wouldn’t be right to give him anything with his face on it.

In fact, he wracked his brain over the perfect gift, and didn’t know what would be appropriate. Their conversation a few weeks ago about Jaehyun’s former crush on him had Johnny admittingly feeling a little weird about his friend. After talking with his grandma about it, she told him to make Jaehyun a cake, because food was temporary, and usually always welcomed.

So, Johnny stayed up late on the thirteenth and his grandma helped him bake and ice a vanilla and strawberry cake.

When Johnny arrived at the school on Valentine’s day, carrying a full-sized cake in a plastic carrier, he got looks. It wasn’t as it seemed, but he still saw people who he had to politely reject whisper to their friends as he walked through the halls— the halls that were decorated with hearts and flowers and words of love on nearly every wall. Johnny got to his classroom and Taeyong was standing behind his desk like usual. He too was in the spirit and wore black slacks, a white button up tucked in, and red suspenders and a red bow tie as well as black wire framed glasses.

Mr. Lee saw the cake in Johnny’s arms and he startled, then looked up at Johnny’s face and back at the cake. Johnny smiled at him, but turned away like he always did, not realizing until he got to his seat that Taeyong must have thought the cake was for him.

Johnny was prepared with nothing for Taeyong. He knew giving his teacher anything would be too close to home, so he had spent the week focusing on a gift for Jaehyun and closing his heart off for the one day a year that was all about hearts.

Jaehyun came in through the door a minute or so later with Doyoung. Johnny had never seen the black-haired beta look so happy in his life, and Jaehyun walked in with his arms full of a bouquet of red roses. Johnny could tell his friend was flustered by how pink his ears were. Johnny gave them space for another minute before he got up from his seat to deliver the cake.

“Hey,” he greeted them both, and Doyoung eyed his parcel, “Happy birthday and happy Valentine’s day,” he said as he set the cake-box down on Jaehyun’s desk and lifted the lid.

“Oh!” Jaehyun chirped, and then laughed. Johnny had spelled ‘Happy Birthday Jeffrey’ with pink icing, and Jaehyun laughed, “How sweet! I though for sure you were going to try to one up my gift from last week.”

“There was no way. How could I compete with that amazing coffee cup?” Johnny asked and then looked at Doyoung, and pointed at the flowers with his thumb, “Those from you?” he asked and Doyoung nodded with a small smile, and Johnny reached his hand down and gave Doyoung a knuckle bump, “Nice.  _ Classic _ ,” he complimented sincerely, still trying to win Doyoung over for the sake of his other friends.

“Do you have a valentine?” Doyoung asked, and Johnny was prepared for that a hundred times today.

“Nope,” he answered with a sigh, “I’m my own valentine today.”

“Oh?” Doyoung asked and Jaehyun and Doyoung shared a look, “So… did you see your locker?” Doyoung asked. Johnny looked between the two of them for a moment and stood up straight.

“No. What’s going on with my locker?” he asked, worried, and Jaehyun laughed.

“You better go look, my dude,” he chuckled and Johnny stopped everything and walked swiftly out of the classroom, hearing Doyoung and Jaehyun laugh together as he left, and feeling Taeyong’s eyes follow him out the door.

Johnny passed Ten and Yuta in the hall and the two of them grinned at him just like Jaehyun did.

“You have  _ some _ secret admirer, John,” Ten hooted.

“Or  _ twelve _ ,” Yuta chimed in and Johnny’s interest skyrocketed as he picked up his pace. Johnny saw a small flock of people down the hall by his locker and for a moment he feared he had been vandalized, but it wasn’t as bad as he thought.

He had been vandalized, but with love.

Someone had stuck adorable white and pink heart stickers all over his locker, and Johnny could see more than one card sticking out from the slats in the metal door. Johnny covered his mouth as he approached it and some of the other students scattered but some stayed back to watch this unfold. Johnny spun in his lock combination and opened the door.

Yuta had been right, about a dozen valentine’s cards, a bunch of confetti, immediately dropped out of his locker and littered onto the floor. Some students laughed delightedly around him.

Johnny felt some form of blush creep onto his face as he knelt and picked up the cards, shaking the glitter off. Inside his locker were more valentines that had fallen on top of his books and a spare jacket he had left in there last week. He gathered every card and held the stack in one arm against his chest.

“Wow,” said a student, “save some love for the rest of us,  _ Johnny _ ,” he joked and John felt his whole face light up in warmth.

He knew some students liked him, he didn’t know  _ this _ many students liked him. As he cleaned up his locker, he heard someone clear their throat behind him. Johnny turned and saw three underclassmen that he recognized all holding carnations.

“We know you didn’t accept anyone as your valentine, but we still wanted to get you these anyway,” and each student handed him a fresh carnation with a long stem and Johnny floundered and smiled as he took them.

“We’re going to cheer for you at your last game next week!” one of them burst out and Johnny looked down at his feet for a second in embarrassment and happiness.

“Thank you all so much,” Johnny muttered, “Did you put these notes in my locker?” he asked as he gestured to the stack of cards.

“No,” the leader of their small group said as he peered around Johnny to glance at the locker, “Someone beat us to it.”

“J-Johnny?” murmured another voice and Johnny turned his attention to another student who had a wrapped gift for him and Johnny’s head spun, “I know you don’t like sweets, but I made you bitter dark chocolate almonds. Please accept them?” she murmured, clearly embarrassed and nervous. Johnny accepted the gift as well and he felt overwhelmed with valentines even though he had told himself he wasn’t going to participate this year.

“Thank you all so much, I had no idea I was this admired,” Johnny said and at that moment the bell rang and Johnny was more thankful than ever for the excuse to leave.

Over the course of the day, more students surprised Johnny with gifts, flowers, and confessions. He had nearly two full bouquets of assorted flowers, more cards from secret admirers than he could keep up with, and a growing bundle of sweets, chocolates, and cookies. His friends were laughing at him and Ten said:

“You know, if you had just chosen one of them to be your valentine, this wouldn’t have happened,” he remarked at lunch as another student dropped a card off with Johnny.

“I didn’t want a valentine,” Johnny murmured very quietly so no other students but his friends could hear him, “I have no idea how I’m going to get all this home today. I’ll have to call my grandma to pick me up.”

The end of the day couldn’t come sooner, and Johnny was eyeing his valentine’s spoils warily as the final bell approached.

“Students, before you leave,” Taeyong announced over the class, “please check your desks for trash, food, or forgotten items. Another class had an ant problem, and we’ve been asked to take better care of our classrooms, so please take home any and all Valentine’s candy,” he said before the bell rang.

Johnny had his stuff organized pretty well, preparing to hopefully take one trip out of the school instead of two. He peeked inside his desk and saw one small, red, cellophane-wrapped box with his name on it. Johnny pulled it out curiously and saw the handwriting on it, then instantly shoved the present into his backpack along with the cards. He could recognize his teacher’s handwriting  _ anywhere _ .

As much as the other unexpected gifts made him flustered, this one made his heart race. He gathered his stuff, fitting as much of it as he could into his backpack and carrying the large presents precariously in one arm and the flowers in the other. He left the room, unable to look at Taeyong for long because of the effort he had to put into not dropping his things.

His grandmother’s car was waiting outside the school and Johnny set the flowers on the hood of the car to open the back door and put his gifts inside, then reached up for the flowers too.

“Oh, my,” his grandmother cooed, “someone was spoiled today,” she laughed and Johnny got into the front seat with his backpack.

“It was madness,” Johnny said, “I didn’t even realize I had so many admirers. They decorated my locker,” he said, telling her about his busy day.

When they got home, he and his grandmother put the flowers in vases around the house and his opened his boxed gifts and let his grandmother have whatever she wanted from the boxes of chocolates. He went to his room at the end of the evening to open his cards, but before he did, he picked up the one gift from the person he truly admired.

Johnny smiled as he opened the box and the smell of mocha lifted into his nose. On the inside of the box, Taeyong had written ‘ _ For my favorite student. I know how much you like coffee. Please enjoy these homemade chocolates. -LTY _ ’

Johnny picked up one of the bite-sized balls and popped one into his mouth. It was rich dark chocolate with finely ground coffee dust rolled over the outside. It was bitter in every right way and Johnny’s shoulders relaxed, and his head tipped back, as he rolled it over his tongue until it melted away completely. The coffee beans he used were strong and dark and Johnny had found a new favorite candy.

He opened each of the other cards left by other students as he indulged in Taeyong’s gift. He had to make sure he didn’t eat them all because they were such a special treat, and in a limited amount.

Even though Johnny couldn’t possibly pay back the other students who had left him valentines on White Day next month, Johnny was already planning the gift he knew he needed to make for his teacher.

~

The last game of the season was extremely bittersweet. The stands were packed to capacity and there was even a group of underclassmen who were wearing matching outfits and had volunteered themselves to be the cheerleaders for the night. There were banners with their names on it, and Johnny’s self-proclaimed fanclub was there. To his surprise Lucas, Jaehyun, and Mark also had sizable fanclubs attending the game too.

It was a close game, and Johnny was distracted in the first half by how sad he was going to be when he didn’t get to hang out with his team anymore, but when they started to fall behind, Johnny put his head back together and focused.

The other team was cutthroat. Seoul International was doing great this year, and the other school had clearly prepared themselves for this game, but when it came time to buckle down and start winning, their team pulled it together famously.

They went home with an emotional victory, where Haechan had scored the winning shot and his team carried him out on their shoulders. Johnny couldn’t help but find his grandmother in the crowd and was moved when he saw his aunt, and his cousin in the stands as well.

Johnny tried not to look at Taeyong too much, but he couldn’t help it.

~

At the end of February, Johnny washed and returned his jersey and basketball shorts and the team had one last meeting in the locker rooms before they cleared out their things. Their coach told them how proud he was of them, and how this was one of the best years he’s ever coached and that it was a privilege to lead their team. There were tears, and hugs, and high fives, and everyone on the team gathered in the hall and stood in commemorated silence as their coach put their winning trophy up on display in the sports cabinet, so anyone who passed by could see it.

At the end of the day, when it was over, they all went out for ice creams and promised that they would all stay friends even though they wouldn’t see each other every day anymore.

The following Monday, students had the option to change their clubs and extracurriculars, and Johnny and Jaehyun both went together to sign up for the music and dance club.

On the first meeting of the music club, Johnny met the four teachers who ran the music and dance department. Taeyong and Miss Kwon he knew, but the other two he didn’t. A beta man named Mr. Byun Baekhyun, the vocal and choir teacher, and a teacher Johnny had recognized often but never knew his name before today; Mr. Kim Jungwoo.

Mr. Kim was the tall, alpha staff member who was always seen with Taeyong around the school, the one that Johnny had a low-key bad taste in his mouth over because he didn’t like how close Mr. Kim seemed to be to Taeyong. He always saw the two of them, and Jungwoo was much taller than Taeyong and always laughed at his jokes and looked at him very attentively.

It all made sense when he introduced himself as a vocal coach and a dance teacher, and Johnny realized that his off put feelings had no basis when he heard the alpha teacher speak in a voice so soft and airy, it put Ten’s to shame.

As he watched the four teachers work together and around each other, Johnny realized that Jungwoo wasn’t attracted to Taeyong; the alpha teacher  _ admired _ Taeyong, which made Johnny feel a lot better about him. Taeyong taught hip-hop and other similar genres, and Jungwoo taught jazz and ballet, both teachers worked together in contemporary styles, and gave each other tips, tricks, and suggestions.

Miss Kwon was the leader of the whole music department and had her hands in singing, music, and dance, but she made it clear that a majority of her time was going to be focusing on Johnny and the piano.

Johnny’s club period was for singing and dancing, and after school lessons were for the piano.

Johnny went home that first week with a huge smile on his face every night and is heart feeling fuller by the day. Classes had become a great deal less frustrating when Korean classes ended and English classes began. Johnny suddenly went from the bottom of the barrel to being the student everyone wanted to study with. He had his friends in the new club with him, Jaehyun, Doyoung, Mark, Yuta, Ten, each one leaning toward their own specialty and favoring their own mentor among the teachers. He had a break in the middle of the school day to change out of his school uniform and into sweatpants and dance shoes. He got to sing songs, and learn choreography, and be around his friends and favorite teacher in a more relaxed setting.

But the evening class was making his life complete. One on one with Miss Kwon, who became a lot less intimidating the more he was around her, and the more piano he got to play for her under her instruction.

He didn’t care that she was making him play the old, less-exciting, classics and he didn’t care that every day she made him practice scales for a half hour. Being given an allotted two and a half hours of time to get private piano lessons from a professional teacher had Johnny feeling fulfilled.

Since moving to Korea, this was the first time that he could look forward and see a much bigger picture of what he wanted for himself besides the short term. When he arrived at this school, the only place he wanted to get to was graduation, but now he had a much larger goal in mind.

College; an arts school, or a music school. Close to Seoul, or maybe near the beach. Somewhere specialized where he could grow and flourish and get even better at any instrument he wanted.

Miss Kwon was bolstering his dreams, and it was one of the first times an adult was telling him that the dream he had was a viable option and that it didn’t have to be a hobby or a fall back. Johnny wanted to throw himself into the thick of it, for no one other than himself, and the more he got to see the other sides of Miss Kwon, and Lee Taeyong, the more he realized he wanted to be like them.

Johnny’s dreams of the piano now started to include dreams of inspiring and teaching others to play too.

~

The month of March brought stormy weather, and a minor cold seemed to sweep through the whole city. Johnny felt pretty confident he wasn’t going to get sick. He almost never fell ill, but his overconfidence got the best of him.

He woke up on Saturday morning with a stuffy nose but didn’t think much of it. By Saturday night he had a headache and felt achy all over. He figured he’d have some hot food, sleep, and then tomorrow it would be all over, but he was wrong.

Johnny woke up the following morning with a complete sinus headache, and he had sweat his bed during the night. He groaned as he sat up, his sticky skin feeling instantly cold after he removed himself from the damp patch on his bed.

It took him a full fifteen minutes to muster up the will to get out of bed, strip his sheets, and find something to wear. He hobbled down the stairs, and bumped into the wall of the narrow corridor. When he got to the bottom of the stairs and entered the kitchen his grandmother gasped.

“Oh, Johnny,” she cooed and walked over to him. She put her hand on his forehead and he tried to shrug her off, “You caught the bug,” she said pitifully.

“No, Grandma. I’m fine,” he said, but his speech was muffled from his clogged nostrils, and the pressure in his head was making him foggy.

“You’re  _ not _ ,” she said, “what’s wrong with your sheets?” she asked and sniffed the air.

“They need to be washed…” he answered, this conversation wearing him out and he’s only been awake for 20 minutes.

“Go start the washer. I’ll make you hot tea and soup. And then go get warmer clothes on, and gather all your dirty laundry, I’ll wash it all,” she said.

“No, Grandma, you’ll get sick,” Johnny whined just a little, “I’ll do my laundry.”

“Fine,” she sighed, and as Johnny went to the laundry machine in the closet near the kitchen, he heard his grandma rummaging through the kitchen cabinets. When Johnny returned after starting his first load of laundry, which felt like a mission in and of itself, his grandma had fished out a pack of disposable medical masks for the both of them and cold medicine for him, “You’ll feel better after you have hot soup, and a nap,” she said, “You’re a strong boy, you’ll fight this off in twenty four hours,” she promised. Except he didn’t. He spent all of Sunday feeling like crap and trying to sleep his existence away. He ate very little that day, not hungry or feeling up to anything.

Come Monday morning, Johnny felt even worse, and now he was running a low fever. His grandma called his school to excuse his absence for the day and drove him to the hospital. In the car, Johnny typed out an email to Taeyong, letting him know he was sick and going to be absent today. He made sure to send it to Taeyong’s work email, and not the personal one.

They spent hours in the hospital waiting their turn. Johnny didn’t enjoy being surrounded by other sick people in facemasks and whining children. There was a general exhausted misery in the whole building.

The doctor saw him and after his diagnosis, Johnny went home frustrated as well as feeling crappy. If it was the flu, he could get antibiotics, but it was a virus, and there was nothing he could take to fight it. He was prescribed plenty of fluids, hot showers, and sleep.

White Day was approaching, and Johnny had been preparing a secret for his teacher in his room over the last few weeks. He had purchased three bars of pure white chocolate that he was planning to melt and dip strawberries into, and he bought a simple silver necklace that he thought would look good on his teacher, and he could put whatever pendant he wanted on it. He wrapped in a white box with a snow-white ribbon tied around it, and now he’d have to wait to give it to Taeyong after White Day; he had no idea how he was going to bring a box of strawberries into the school anyway.

Johnny sent Taeyong an email at the end of the night informing his teacher that he was still very sick and it was looking like he was going to be sick for a few more days, and that he would appreciate it if he would let Miss Kwon know that he would be missing a few more days of piano lessons.

Johnny was exhausted beyond compare but his headache kept him up. It felt like his head was an over inflated balloon. His grandmother bought him nighttime flu medicine to help him sleep, but even though it could only treat his symptoms, Johnny was thankful for the temporary relief that allowed him to sleep.

~

Taeyong’s heart was pounding as he parked his car on the street and checked the address one more time. He took a calming breath as he gathered his bag over his shoulder and got out of his car. He opened the backdoor and carefully picked up the small crockpot in the backseat, being careful not to drop it or the book-bag over his shoulder. He locked the doors and walked across the street to the small house he had arrived in front of.

He felt embarrassed, having to set the crockpot down on the step to raise his knuckles and knock on the door, and he quickly picked up his dish again. A little part of him hoped no one would answer, but then he wouldn’t be able to give his gifts to their intended recipient. He was snapped out of thought when an old woman opened the door and her owlish eyes looked up at him curiously.

“Hello, Mrs. Kim? I’m a friend from Johnny’s school,” Taeyong said respectfully. He would never admit that he practiced that line and chose those words exactly. The omega grandmother smiled and looked down at the crockpot in his hands and then back up at Taeyong’s face with a kind smile and he felt a spark of familiarity as he saw a shadow Johnny’s smile in her wizened face, and he knew he had arrived at the right address.

“Oh, hello. How do you do?” she asked him with a friendly chirp.

“I’m doing well. I heard that Johnny was sick and I made him some soup, and also I have some homework for him and a note from his piano teacher,” he said and his grandmother stepped aside and offered to show Taeyong in. Taeyong entered the house gratefully and the smell was homey and nostalgic. It smelt like home-cooked food, and earthy tea leaves, and the smell of the alpha student that he could never quite shake.

“How thoughtful of you! My grandson has such good friends. I’m not sure how up for doing homework he is, he’s been pretty worn out this week,” his grandmother said as Taeyong slipped off his shoes in their foyer, “but if you’d like to visit him, his room is on the second floor. I’d go get him for you, but I can’t climb the stairs anymore,” she said with a smile and lead Taeyong into the kitchen.

Taeyong took in the homemade wooden table, the quaint kitchen, and antique cutlery and china. It was so charming and delightful. He didn’t know what he was expecting. He knew Johnny lived with his grandmother, but for some reason he didn’t expect the household to be so homey after his encounter with Johnny’s mother a month ago. The smell and atmosphere eased his worried feelings for a moment. The elder omega lead him to the bottom of the stairwell past the kitchen and she called up the stairs to her grandson.

“John-ah! Your friend is here! I’m sending him up,” she called fondly and she smiled back at Taeyong, “Go right ahead.”

Taeyong nodded gratefully, but as he started his way up the stairwell, and the smell of sickness and alpha cascaded over him, his hands started to sweat again. He gripped the crockpot tighter to ensure it wouldn’t slip. As Taeyong got closer to the top of the stairs, the smell of Johnny thickened.

It wasn’t the student’s usual scent, it was muted and muffled by the illness that had caused him to miss school. When Taeyong got to the slightly open door at the top of the stairs he cleared his throat to announce his entrance, before nudging the door aside.

Johnny’s bedroom was small. He had a twin sized bed, and a little desk with a computer, and a dresser. There was a rug on the floor and a few articles of discarded clothes. He had some hooks on the wall and Taeyong spotted his school uniform hanging up, and a couple jackets. Taeyong’s eyes fell to the bed where Taeyong could see the shape of his student under the blanket. His heart fell at the smell and the overall feeling of draining sickness in the room. He moved quietly to the bedside table and set the warm crockpot down. He took the cord and peeked around the nightstand for an outlet to plug it in, in his movement, he heard Johnny stir and groan softly.

Taeyong got the crockpot plugged in, took his bag off his shoulder, and moved back to sit on the foot of the small bed. Johnny heard someone moving around his room and he thought he smelled someone familiar around him. He groaned, his interrupted sleep made him feel groggy. He felt someone’s weight sink into the foot of his bed and for a moment he thought his grandmother had entered his room to check on him, but then his brain remembered that his grandma couldn’t get up and down the stairs.

He opened his eyes a crack, the soft light in his room making his head throb, and his eyes traveled to the person at the foot of his bed. For a moment, he thought he was having a fever dream, but then what little smells he could sense pulled him back to reality.

Johnny registered that it was Taeyong in his room and on his bed and his eyes widened. He reached his hand up to his bedside table and his knuckles knocked into something hard and warm; he fumbled his hand around for his black, cloth facemask he had purchased a long time ago.

“Mr. Lee?” Johnny asked bewilderedly as he slipped the mask over his face and ears, “what are you doing here?” he gasped out, and forced himself to sit up even though his body told him to remain down.

“I came to check on you,” Taeyong admitted, “I had some things to give you, homework mostly. And that,” Taeyong pointed to the crockpot and Johnny’s eyes followed it. He leaned over it and peeked inside the glass top, “I made you galbitang… you told me the last time that you wanted it when you were sick, so…” his teacher trailed off.

Johnny’s woozy head spun and he looked back at his teacher, then at the soup, then back again.

“Thank you,” Johnny said, but his clogged sinuses made it come out all pitifully, “How did you get up here?” he asked.

“Your grandma let me in. I think she assumed I was a student…” he whispered, “How are you feeling?”

“Like shit,” Johnny sighed, his shoulders falling and he peered up at Taeyong through his messy bangs, “Sorry for cursing.”

Taeyong smiled sadly, and didn’t even care that Johnny had cursed.

“It’s fine,” he said and then looked down and reached into his bag, “I actually have stuff to give you,” he said as he reached in and pulled out Johnny’s sweater, the most recent article Johnny had let Taeyong borrow over the weekend. Taeyong usually left those gifts on Johnny’s desk or chair on Monday morning, but Johnny had been absent, “I also brought you one of my own,” Taeyong said as he pulled out a clean white tee-shirt he had kept in his bed last two nights, “Although, by the sounds of it, I’m not sure how well you can smell right now.”

Johnny felt honored and slightly weak as he reached out and took the soft cotton shirt. He raised it to his face and tried to inhale. It came out bubbly and gross, but Johnny could still detect some of the smell through it. It made him feel heavy, and his heart started to ache as well as his body.

“Thank you,” Johnny murmured, touched, even though it was so bittersweet.

“You’re welcome,” his teacher said, and reached into his bag again, “And here’s your homework, and a get well note from Miss Kwon,” he added, “still a teacher at heart, you know?”

Johnny smiled behind his facemask, and he set the stack of papers down next to him and he looked back at the soup in the little crockpot.

“Can I have some now?” Johnny asked, not sure if he was hungry but he knew he should be, seeing as he had eaten this morning and now it was almost sundown. Taeyong nodded.

“Eat as much as you can. And get better. I want you back at school soon,” he said. Johnny sat up a little more and lifted the crockpot lid. The steam came rising out of it immediately and Johnny pulled his mask down under his chin, not caring how he looked. Taeyong produced a pair of wooden chopsticks from his bag and he handed them to Johnny.

The alpha mixed the soup around and scooped up some of the noodles gratefully. The flavors were dulled by his sickness, but he could still tell it was delicious, and warm, and it was the gesture that really moved him. He slurped down the first bite gratefully, his eyes closed as he slowly chewed. Taeyong reached his hand out and placed it on Johnny’s knee over the blanket.

“You look so worn out,” he whispered, “I wish… there was something more I could do to help,” his teacher whispered. Johnny nodded slowly and he set down the chopsticks on the bedside table.

“It’s alright…” Johnny whispered and he looked down at Taeyong’s comforting hand before looking up at his face. It hurt Johnny a lot to have Taeyong here with him, in another private place where the two of them could form more secrets together, but he knew he had to hold back and be patient, when all he wanted to do was grab the hand touching him over the blanket. They lingered there in silence for a good while, Johnny’s head drooping like his soul. Taeyong’s worried, kind eyes were going to kill him.

“You should probably go...” Johnny whispered after a moment, knowing that he needed to push Taeyong away, “I don’t want to get you sick,” he murmured.

Taeyong stood up from the bed but his feet didn’t want to move. Johnny’s hair, all mussed, and his pink nose, and tired eyes made Taeyong want to stay, and hold him, and make sure he ate all the soup and took his medicine on time… but it wasn’t Taeyong’s job to take care of Johnny.

Just like Johnny, Taeyong had to push the young alpha away. They both had their silent burdens to bear.

“Get well soon,” Taeyong murmured finally, and picked up his bag from the floor, much lighter now than before.

“I will,” Johnny promised with a tired voice, “Oh, Taeyong, wait,” Johnny stopped him, and Taeyong’s heart beat heavier, hearing his first name out of Johnny’s lips. Taeyong turned and Johnny pointed to his desk. On top of the surface by the keyboard was a little white box and two bars of white chocolate. Taeyong walked over to it and his hand hovered above it, “That’s for you,” Johnny whispered, “Happy belated White Day,” he said.

Taeyong’s eyes swept the desk as his heart thudded heavily. He reached for the little box and picked it up delicately.

“You don’t have to open it here,” Johnny said, “the chocolate is for you too,” he added.

Taeyong felt his eyes watering as he picked up the gifts.

It wasn’t appropriate for them to be exchanging gifts like this. Chocolate, clothing, and other tokens of unsaid affection; his mind couldn’t help but drifting to the older alpha student when he was alone, or at a bookstore, or at the farmer’s market. Taeyong put the gifts into his bag before he turned back to Johnny and swallowed, his hands shaking again.

“Thank you,” he managed to get out, “Feel better. I’ll see you at school soon.”

Taeyong left the bedroom quietly. He stopped at the bathroom at the top of the stairs to wash his hands, before he traveled back down to the first floor, and Johnny’s sweet grandmother showed him out the door. He shouldn’t have risked it, pulling Johnny’s file, and finding his address, and going to his house to check on him… but he couldn’t help himself.

Taeyong drove home feeling guilty and regretful. When he got to his house, he pulled into the garage and looked over at his bag, where the little white gift was waiting for him. He could feel it on the seat next to him the entire ride home, and once he was in solitude, he reached for the gift.

When Taeyong lifted the lid and saw the beautiful, simple, silver necklace chain… he broke.

Just for a minute, Taeyong cried in the front seat of his car alone. His heart breaking over someone he couldn’t have at the risk of losing everything he’s built. He was so good at putting up a front around the school and the other students, but Johnny… John Suh was just burrowing deeper and deeper into him and he couldn’t escape the overwhelming sorrow and fear of wanting to care for his student.

So Taeyong allowed himself the guilty catharsis of crying over him.

Tomorrow, everything would go back to the way it was, but just for now he could accept his feelings and drown in them.

~

When Johnny finally felt well enough to go back to school, his friends and other students flocked to him with words of welcome and concern. Johnny smiled at them all, and thanked them graciously. His nose was still slightly plugged, but he no longer had a fever or felt like he was running on a twenty percent battery. He carried a packet of travel tissues with him just in case.

Johnny spotted Taeyong that morning and Taeyong touched his collar bone, playing with the necklace around his neck and Johnny instantly realized it was the chain that he had purchased for him. Mr. Lee smiled as he saw Johnny notice and he pulled his fingers away before anyone else could notice too. Johnny looked away, but brought his fingers up to touch his ear, where the stud that Taeyong gave him rested. He spared another glance and watched Taeyong look away with a little smile on his face.

~

At the end of March in homeroom class, Mr. Lee passed out sheets of paper detailing the Sports Day festival they were going to have at the beginning of May, and another sheet talking about the options the senior classes had for their end of the year class trip.

The students started buzzing as people immediately began chatting about where they wanted to go for their class trip and Taeyong had to quiet them.

“We have to vote on our destination. Our class and the other senior classes will all be tallied and the majority rules,” he said, “It’s either camping on the beach on Jeju Islands, or camping on the mainland in the mountains. Both campsites have cabins, and running water for showers and bathrooms, so we won’t be roughing it, but both destinations have swimming, hiking, and fishing. All in favor for mountains, raise your hand,” Taeyong called. The class quieted as a few people raised their hands, Taeyong jotted down the number, “And all in favor of Jeju island?” more people raised their hands, including Johnny, and Taeyong wrote down that number too. Honestly, who wouldn’t want to go to the beach?

“Okay, I’ll submit this to the other staff and we’ll see at the end of the week where we’ll be going. I’ll also need everyone to take home a permission slip and have your parents or guardians fill it out. You can’t go on the trip if you don’t have a permission slip,” Taeyong said and passed out stacks of papers for the class to pass around.

The class chattered again for a few moments as everyone got a blank permission slip packet. Johnny flipped through it briefly and saw the section for allergies, and emergency contacts, and the other logistics and details pertaining to class field trips.

“Okay, now let’s talk about the Sports Festival,” Taeyong said, “there’s a lot of activities. A relay race, archery, long jump, high jump, tug of war, hula hoop, jump-rope… so many. The senior teachers have bets placed on whose class is going to win, and do you know who’s gonna win this year?” Mr. Lee asked with a sly smile.

“We are!” Johnny and Jaehyun yelled in unison, and Jaehyun turned to look at Johnny from across the room with a brotherly connection, and Johnny pointed at Jaehyun and then smacked his palm to his chest, their competitiveness and team spirit filling.

“Yes, we are!” Taeyong chimed too and put one clenched fist into the air, “Who’s gonna win?” he asked again and this time most, if not every, student in the class sang out:

“We are!!”

“That’s right!!” Taeyong cheered, “We have half the basketball team, and half the dance crew in this room. We are taking home gold this year,” he promised, and the class was feeling the hype.

Taeyong put two sheets up on the board with tape and urged students to sign up for sports. They had a month and a half to practice and put together teams, and Johnny was interested in archery and tug of war, knowing he would excel in both those sports. The other students all seemed pretty excited too.

Nothing like a Sports Day to bring a school together in friendly competition.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey bros, I'm on the downward slope of this fic, hopefully gonna have it finished completely in a month.  
> Also, I can't estimate chapters, may or may not end up being more than 12, jury is still out on that one. But I'm mf trying.  
> Thanks for reading. If you love me you'll drop a review n.n  
> -Copper


	10. The Senior Class Trip

After March, Johnny felt like he had become much better at avoiding his feelings for Taeyong. They were there, he couldn’t deny it, but he thought he was better at keeping himself under wraps. They still shot little looks to each other when they could, but Johnny’s need to keep this secret to the end of the school year pushed him through.

The month of April seemed to fly by. In the last week of the month, two weeks before the Sports Festival, Taeyong had set aside a half hour of class time so they could stretch and do minor practicing for the events.

It was fun, being in the classroom but doing synchronized stretches and short reps of workouts.

When the Sports Festival arrived at the first Friday of May, Johnny was asked last minute by the student council if he could bring his camera to take some pictures of the event and email them to the student council for the yearbook. Since Johnny was only in two sports, he happily agreed, loving a reason to bust out his camera and take pictures of everyone.

Taeyong was wearing a matching track suit that day, looking in the sporty spirit since the whole school was outside. Johnny snapped a couple secret pictures of his teacher when he wasn’t looking and one when he was, Johnny capturing a great photo of Taeyong’s stunning smile as he posed.

He gave his camera to Jaehyun to protect when it came time for archery, and Johnny rather liked how the onlookers would go quiet right before they took their shots.

Johnny did well, placing in first for the senior class, and he shook hands with his opponents after. Jaehyun took some really nice photos of him in position with the bow drawn, and Johnny felt proud when Taeyong gave him a secret thumbs up and smile for his job well done.

Their team didn’t win the tug of war or the relay race, but they gave it a valiant effort. When they tallied up everyone’s scores at the end of the festival, Taeyong’s class placed second in their year, and Taeyong looked distraught. Two other teachers, one of whom being Kim Jungwoo, came over to gloat, and Johnny overheard their conversation just a little bit.

“We’re going to accompany you this weekend, just to be absolutely sure the deed gets done.”

“It  _ will _ get done. I’m a man of my word,” Taeyong grumbled. Jungwoo looked like a coyote with his grin, and Johnny tried not to narrow his eyes at them.

The following Monday, Johnny stood outside his classroom chatting with his classmates, going over the pictures Johnny had taken at the festival, and Ten shushed them when Mr. Lee came down the hall. When everyone fell into questioning silence, Johnny looked up and saw the reason for the awkward moment.

Taeyong was wearing a  _ beanie _ .

This was extremely odd. Taeyong was one of the most fashionable teachers on the faculty, and always came to work wearing an upstanding outfit with his hair neatly done. The grey beanie was wildly out of place, especially for May. The students looked at each other and then wandered into the class after their teacher.

“ _ Hey, Mr. T _ ,” Ten asked, using the name the dance students used for Taeyong, “what’s with the hat?”

Taeyong murmured something under his breath and then looked up and said:

“You’ll all find out soon enough. Now, please go to your seats,” he said, mildly annoyed and grumpy. Johnny tried to give his teacher a questioning look, but Taeyong ignored his gaze. Johnny went back to his desk feeling only a little hurt that Taeyong was acting cold. He found his discarded sweatshirt from the sports festival that he intentionally left on the back of his seat, and he picked it up and put it in his bag, smelling the faint scent of Taeyong left over on it.

Before the bell rang, Mr. Kim Jungwoo and the other senior class teacher who had mocked him at the festival came in and leaned on the doorframe of Mr. Lee’s classroom. The second they poked their heads in, Taeyong’s face could not contain his irritation.

“Oh,  _ Taeyonggie _ ,” Jungwoo sang, and Johnny felt his proverbial hackles rise at the nickname. Even though he knew Jungwoo wasn’t as much of a threat, it still bothered the shit out of him, “that hat is not up to dress code,” he reminded loftily. Johnny’s eyes flicked to Taeyong, who placed both of his hands on his desk and bowed his head as he sighed. When he looked back up again, his jaw was tight.

“I have… two more minutes before the bell. Leave me alone,” he answered slowly and calmly. But then the bell rang, his two minutes cut short.

“Oh!” the other teacher said, “Class is beginning!”

“You have to take off the hat and accept your punishment,” Mr. Kim said.

Taeyong took another deep breath, and Johnny’s heart rate increased. The class was dead silent, watching with anticipation. Taeyong looked up with a huff at his class.

“I lost a bet when we didn’t win first place at the Sports Festival,” Taeyong stated and reached for his beanie and ripped it off.

Johnny jaw dropped and his mind went blank.

Taeyong’s hair was cotton candy  _ pink _ .

Every female in the class cooed, oohed, and awed. Jaehyun slowly turned around in his seat to catch a glimpse of Johnny’s expression, and Johnny covered his mouth with both hands, unable to look away from Taeyong, whose messy pink hair was lighter than the blush on his face.

It looked… amazing. His pale skin complimented it well, and it made his dark brown eyes look more striking than usual. Johnny never thought of his teacher with brightly colored hair before, but now his mind was filling in all sorts of colors Taeyong would probably look great in, but Johnny had a real soft spot for how cute the pink looked.

“It’s not permanent!” Taeyong called over the class. The two teachers laughed, and Taeyong pointed at them, “You two, go back to your own classrooms!” he yelled.

Mr. Lee huffed again as they left and then turned back to his class, straightening his shirt front and running a hand through his flowery locks.

“I’m dying it back to a normal shade at the end of the day,” he informed them, and Johnny almost wanted to contest that, because he kinda liked that his teacher looked like a fairy.

The whole school day was rather distracting. Some students couldn’t stop commenting and talking about it, and Johnny really just wanted to ask Taeyong if he could take a picture of him before he changed it.

Johnny managed to take one in secret with his phone right before lunch, and he stared at it for a moment with a secret smile before he locked his phone and put it away.

True to his word, Taeyong came back to school the next day with his hair dark once more. His hair was glossy black, and when someone mentioned how they’ll miss the pink, Taeyong laughed and said that it wasn’t appropriate for a teacher to have brightly colored hair and that the only color that would cover it all was black.

Johnny had his head resting in his hand as he gazed at his teacher, admiring his beauty and losing himself in thought. The solid black was quite a sophisticated look, and it made his brown eyes stand out brighter than the blond did. Johnny just accepted that any color Taeyong dyed his hair would look amazing.

His mind came back to reality when Taeyong started talking about the end of the year trip coming up and how they all needed to start their preparation and packing. The location that the senior class all voted on was Jeju Island; the plan was they were going to take busses and then a ferry to their location.

Johnny was excited for the trip because a mere three weeks after they got back from it were final exams, the musical showcase, and the most important short-term goal in Johnny’s eyes: graduation.

~

The ferry ride to Jeju island was lovely. The brisk, salty air, the breeze, the huge group of teenagers who were buzzing with excitement over an extended field trip. Johnny couldn’t help keeping his eyes out for his group, classmates, and teacher as the Island of Jeju kept getting bigger on the horizon.

Johnny was overpacked, for sure. He had packed the essentials on the list that Taeyong had passed out to them. Socks, hiking boots, shorts and long pants, pajamas for the cold, a thick jacket, a smaller travel backpack and refillable water bottle, sunscreen, an appropriate bathing suit, a sleeping bag, and so much more on the list. His largest duffle bag was packed to capacity. He brought his camera, an extra blanket, and his phone charger and portable battery even though he wasn’t sure about how good the wifi would be at the campsite.

There were five teachers and an additional five parent volunteers for the trip. Johnny was sad that his underclassmen friends like Mark, Lucas, and Haechan couldn’t go, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t enjoy his time with Jaehyun, Ten, Yuta, and the rest of his friends.

They arrived at the island, and everyone took their bags and got on the trams that were waiting for them at the port. Johnny was taking all sorts of pictures of the beach, the island, the plants, and candid photos of his friends as they went.

When they got to the campsite, the whole group seemed to be itching for some activity or adventure, having been seated in the trams, busses, and the ferry for the past four hours. Johnny was ready to drop his stuff and take a walk down the beach.

The campsite had multiple picnic tables and two lines of small wooden cabins that they were told had bunk beds in them. Before they were allowed to go off and have some beach fun, the whole group had to stick together so they could separate into whichever cabins they were staying in. The campsite officials who worked on the island handed them all out maps and explained the boundaries of the beach, the town a couple miles away, what to do in an emergency, and all that.

Johnny was nervous about sleeping arrangements. He needed to know which cabins were going to have his friends in it, and, most importantly, which cabin Mr. Lee was sleeping in.

He would be lying to himself if he didn’t admit he was worried about Taeyong’s need for good sleep. After the weekend, Taeyong always looked his best, but by Thursday and Friday, his eyebags were back. Johnny knew that if they slept close to each other, he could maybe help keep Mr. Lee asleep.

The teachers had lists of names that they all read out one name at a time, splitting their groups and organizing their cabins. There was no mixing, the girls and boys were in their own cabins. Mr. Lee called Ten’s name, and Jaehyun’s name, and Johnny’s anxiety rose as he waited for one of the adults to call him. In his heart he figured he’d be separate from his teacher because Taeyong probably wouldn’t risk that kind of closeness. He called two others’ names before he called Johnny’s. Johnny was confused but wasn’t going to question it at all when he was called to be in Taeyong’s cabin, and he grabbed his duffle and sleeping bag and made his way over to the group gathering by his teacher. Mr. Lee gave him a polite smile as he joined their group, and Johnny smiled back, his heart filling with happiness at being chosen and being allowed to sleep near Taeyong for the first time. He went and stood by Jaehyun.

After all the groups were separated, they went to their respective cabins to drop their stuff. The cabins weren’t very big. In fact, they were nothing but an empty wooden room with five bunk beds. Two on each side wall and one towards the back. Johnny, being the tallest, claimed the bottom bunk at the back of the cabin, and Jaehyun threw his duffle and sleeping bag on the bed above Johnny’s. Taeyong took the bunk next to Johnny’s, the placement of their pillows had their heads within four feet from each other, and Johnny knew his ulterior motive to help his teacher sleep well would work.

After they all settled their sleeping arrangements, Johnny took off his shoes and dug through his bag for the pair of flip flops he brought. He tossed his pillow and extra blanket on the bed and also pulled out a separate plastic bag that had his electronics and chargers in it. He heard a small laugh behind him and looked over at Taeyong who was grinning at Johnny’s wires.

“Youngho, we’re on a camping trip, and you brought an iPad and every conceivable charger?” his teacher teased, and Johnny grinned.

“Well, yeah. We’re going to have one lazy day on the beach, right? I might want to read a book, or play a game, or look up a poisonous plant,” he made up, and Taeyong rolled his eyes with an amused smile.

The class then had snacks from the back of one of the trucks; the campsite was going to provide them with enough food for all of them, and it was going to be delivered every day. The students munched on fresh veggies and chips while the parents set up the kitchen area with portable barbeques and stoves and coolers so they could make lunch.

Before the students were allowed to wander on their own, the teachers had them all pair into groups of two.

“We’re using the buddy-system this weekend, students. So, pair up!” called Mrs. Kim, then Mr. Kim Jungwoo took over.

“If you need to go to the bathroom, take your buddy. If you want to go explore town, take your buddy. If you’re going go walk along the beach…?” he trailed off.

“Take your buddy,” some students responded.

“ _ What _ ?” Taeyong asked, clear over everyone.

“Take your buddy!” more of the students chimed together, and Taeyong started clapping.

“Good job, guys. We want to be safe this weekend. No accidents, no lost students. Got it?” he asked, and the students all agreed.

Johnny looked to Jaehyun, hoping to see that his best friend was willing to be his designated buddy for the weekend seeing as they were sharing a cabin, but Doyoung had appeared by Jaehyun’s other side. Johnny saw the black-haired beta’s arm around Jaehyun’s waist, and he chose not to interfere.

Before he could look around, he felt someone slip their hands around his bicep, and Johnny looked to his left to see Ten smiling cheekily up at him.

“Be my buddy?” Ten asked with a grin, and Johnny couldn’t help but smile back.

“You got it,” he said, thankful not to be standing there alone.

“Good, because I have to go to the bathroom,” Ten immediately proclaimed and tugged Johnny around to go to the stone bathrooms with him, “and just between us, I’m concerned about the showers here. I need to know what the situation is and if I’m gonna be showering locker-room style with a big group of boys. Lucas would be so pissed if he knew I had showered naked around other alphas,” Ten said as they stepped through the soft sand on their way to the bathrooms, arm in arm.

“I mean, you could always wear your bathing suit in the showers,” Johnny suggested, and Ten looked up at him with a deadpan expression.

“I’m no  _ coward _ ,” he responded with a perfectly straight face, and Johnny nearly tripped over himself as the laughter erupted from his chest.

As Ten went to use the restroom, Johnny checked out the showers adjacent and informed Ten that there were private shower stalls, but the floors were probably disgusting so he should wear flip flops while he used them. They made their way back out to the beach, and Ten stretched his arms over his head and let out a yummy-noise in pleasure. Johnny gave him a side eye.

“I feel sorry for all those sad-saps back at school. All studying away at their little desks while we’re in paradise, on a beach,” he said, and Johnny snickered.

“You’re literally from Thailand, and you call this paradise?” he asked, “I want your mentality.”

“You don’t think this is paradise?” Ten asked, and Johnny took a look around at the worn cabins they were staying in, the rickety metal buses they had arrived here on, the volleyball net that some of the students were piecing together, and then his eyes landed on his teacher. Taeyong was in shorts and a tee-shirt, and he had a throw-back waist bag around his hips. He was constantly pushing back his windswept black hair, and Johnny felt his heart bubble up as he saw how relaxed Taeyong was when he wasn’t being so teacherly.

“Yeah, okay. It’s pretty nice,” Johnny conceded.

“Better than school?” Ten asked and elbowed him in the side, making Johnny grin again.

“Yeah,  _ much _ better than school.”

They met up with Doyoung, Jaehyun, Yuta, Sicheng, and some of the other students in their grade. They were going to play volleyball with some of the other students, and even though Johnny kind of wanted to play, he knew that Ten would be lukewarm about it, so they walked down to the ocean to test the water.

They took off their shoes and let the ocean wash over their feet for a while. The water was cold, but he knew if they went swimming in it, it would feel really nice. Johnny picked up his camera that had been hanging around his neck and took a picture of the sparkling blue ocean and the horizon, and then a couple of Ten as he giggled at the attention and smiled brightly for him.

Johnny then kicked water at him, and Ten gasped and started splashing Johnny back with vengeance, to which the alpha responded by running back onto the beach, yelling and protecting his camera from the water.

They walked back to the campsite after a while, some of the students already laying out on towels and watching the heated volleyball game that was commencing with way too many students on each team.

Johnny suggested the two of them go and help the teachers and parents with lunch, and the adults were more than happy for the extra hands.

Taeyong hovered around Johnny as he stood by a large cast iron barbeque, taking up the tongs and flipping the meat. He gave Johnny a squeeze on the shoulder and a word of praise, and Johnny felt like Ten might be right. Paradise is just what you make of it.

The whole class gathered for lunch, and all the students ate meat sandwiches with pickled veggies and fresh-cut fruit. After lunch, the campsite workers went over a long list of plants and animals that inhabited the island, what plants not to touch, and what each animal tracks look like and which ones to avoid. It was a very relaxed earth-science lesson that took about two hours, and their task for the weekend was to find three plants or three animals and write a paragraph each about them, extra credit if you could draw the plant or animal too.

After the lesson, the teachers called for second helpings leftover from lunch, saying that wasting food was a terrible idea because it could attract unwanted animals. A few students came and grabbed more food, and Taeyong urged more of the students to come and finish the food they had cooked. Johnny stood up with his plate to load up a second helping, and he nudged Jaehyun to get up and go eat more with him. As Johnny filled his plate to the edges, he heard Taeyong behind him.

“You think you’re gonna be able to eat all that?” he asked quietly, and Johnny looked over his shoulder at Taeyong, who had one eyebrow raised. Johnny had a few things he could have said to that:

“ _ You have no idea how much food I can put away _ .”  “ _ When you’re as big as me, it takes a lot to fill me up _ .” and the way too flirty reply: “ _ Watch me _ .”

Instead, Johnny just smiled cheekily and went back with his second plate to sit down with his friends and eat. He was on vacation, and when someone told him to eat more, he wasn’t going to refuse.

“ _ Jesus _ ,” Ten commented when Johnny sat down with another completely full plate, as Jaehyun sat next to him with just a sandwich, “Ambitious, are we?” he asked, and Johnny smirked.

“We don’t want to be wasteful,” he said, like he was doing everyone a service as he began demolishing his second plate. When he was done with it, he picked up a bottle of water to wash it down, feeling comfortably full, and Ten was staring at him with respect.

“There’s something so  _ sexy _ about a man who can  _ eat _ ,” he murmured to their table, making a group of girls next to them burst into laughter.

The rest of the afternoon leading into nighttime was just fun and games. Jaehyun, Doyoung, Ten, and Johnny went for a long walk along the beach and then turned around and walked back. Ten was picking up pretty stones and shells he found along the way. By the time the sun went down, people were retreating to their cabins to change into warmer clothes, and Johnny offered the adults his help with getting dinner together.

Dinner was less formal. The campsite people lit up a couple bonfires on the beach, and everyone roasted hot dogs on sticks and then smores as well. When people had finished charring their hot dogs, they went to eat at the picnic tables and stepped out of the way so other people could take their turn with the skewers in front of the fire.

Johnny sat huddled with Ten and the rest of his friends, and down the table, Taeyong sat with a group of other dance students and Jungwoo.

The dinner was going joyously, people were munching, talking, and joking. Johnny heard someone’s cell phone alarm go off from down the table, and a few students all checked their phones to see if it was theirs. After a moment, part of the group Taeyong was sitting with broke out into disbelieving shrieks, and one sentence cut clear over the rest, making Johnny freeze mid-chew.

“Mr. Lee, you take  _ heat suppressants _ !?” yelled one of the girls, making more than a few heads look over their way, and Johnny’s eyes flicked to Mr. Lee’s face from down the table. Taeyong looked caught off guard, an open pill bottle in his hand, and he glared at the girl across from him.

“ _Excuse_ me. Lower your voice, _please_ ,” his annoyance dripped out, and the girl who had shouted seemed to shrink under his response, “ _Yes_ , since you’ve made it your business. I do take heat suppressants during the school year,” he said. A few omega students immediately got up from their seats and rushed over, asking him questions, and Johnny felt Jaehyun put a hand on his shoulder.

“ _ Breathe _ ,” Jaehyun whispered to him. Johnny swallowed his bite of food hard, and he felt the large obstruction slink down his esophagus painfully. The gaggle of omegas all clustered around Taeyong started asking questions.

“Why?”  “I thought they were supposed to be bad for you?”  “Don’t they stunt your growth or something?” they all jabbered at once.

A memory of Christmas months ago played back through Johnny’s head. The alarm that woke him up, and the ‘vitamins’ Taeyong claimed he took every day at the same time. He never thought that idea strange until this moment. Vitamins didn’t need a schedule like that, but another sort of drug or supplement would.

“Students,” Taeyong chastised, and Johnny watched as Taeyong threw a tiny white pill in his mouth and took a swig of water. After he swallowed, he looked around him at the following of curious young omegas and sighed, “I’m not a health teacher, but I guess I’m going to turn this into a health lesson. Suppressants are only bad for you if you take them before an omega gets their first heat and during your teenage years when your body is still growing and developing. You all seem to forget that I am your  _ teacher _ , and I am an  _ adult _ . Taking heat suppressants is a choice that some people make. It’s my choice, and it’s not damaging my body. Now, say a fourteen or fifteen-year-old omega was taking heat suppressants every day, then that’s a different matter.”

“But… why take them at all?” asked Ten, one of the omegas who was listening in. Johnny’s ears were straining to catch every bit of knowledge he could from this conversation, even though he was an alpha and it was none of his business. His teacher’s body autonomy shouldn’t be his concern.

Taeyong took another calculative breath, and every omega seemed to inch in closer.

“Some people’s heats are very mild, and some are not. I take heat suppressants over the course of the school year so I never have to take a sick day off. Have I  _ ever _ had a substitute teacher, students?” he asked, and Johnny realized, no, Taeyong had never missed a day of class. Mr. Lee continued, “ _ No _ , I don’t take days off. I love my job, and I love my students,” Taeyong said fondly, “but if anyone asks me why I’m taking heat suppressants again, of if I catch anyone talking about it at the school, I will have the principle take action. Talking about such a private or medical matter such as this is inappropriate, and if we were on school grounds, I would have all of you sent to the principal’s office for invasion of privacy,” Taeyong said calmly before he got up and left the table, “No more talk of this. It’s not your place,” he finished.

Johnny watched him slip his pills into his jacket pocket, throw away his plate, and then turn and walk back to his cabin. After a moment, Kim Jungwoo went trailing after him. Johnny turned back to his food, his thoughts racing, and he felt Jaehyun put a comforting hand on his knee.

“ _You need to_ _relax_ ,” Jaehyun said quietly to him in English, and Johnny shut his eyes. He wanted to ask Taeyong a million burning questions, but he knew that that territory was way past their boundaries. Johnny could only sit where he was and simmer quietly about this new information.

“ _ Fuck, I can’t wait for graduation _ ,” Johnny whispered back before he picked up what was left on his plate and quickly ate it, shoving his mouth with food so he couldn’t talk about it anymore.

~

Johnny woke up the next morning in a quiet, dimly lit cabin as the grey light from the sealed screen door washed in. The soft hushing of ocean waves could be heard, as well as the slow breathing of the people around him. Johnny looked up, angling his neck back, to see Mr. Lee.

His teacher was curled on his side in a little ball, his black hair a mess, his face peaceful, and his lips parted just so as he breathed in and out. Johnny didn’t want to wake anyone up just yet, so he remained in his bunk, curling over onto his side to survey his teacher a little better.

The conversation last night over dinner still bothered and itched at him. He wondered if it would be okay if he asked Taeyong about it in private sometime, but the way he left dinner yesterday made it seem like he had been annoyed and insulted by the conversation. He had never seen Taeyong lash out at anyone, it wasn’t in his nature, but last night his calm voice was almost venomous. With good reason too; Johnny knew he would hate it if people nosed their way into his medical life like that.

He felt Jaehyun in the bunk above him roll over, the frame of the bed creaking with him, and Johnny smiled to himself, feeling a little closer to paradise with his favorite people sleeping around him.

He heard feet crunching the gravel and sand outside their cabin, talking softly as they made their way to the campsite or bathrooms, and Johnny heard Ten let out a sleepy groan from his bunk over Taeyong’s. After a while, Johnny decided it was time to get up and was the first out of bed. He slipped out of his pajama bottoms and put on some swim trunks, then he shed his sleepshirt and put on a clean one to wear for the day. Jaehyun woke up next and stretched in his bed, brushing his bare knuckles against the ceiling.

Johnny was basically ready, he was about to leave and go find something to do, or eat, or help with, but then he remembered that he needed to go with his buddy. Ten was still asleep, and Johnny sat back down in his bed and took out his iPad, thinking he’d read a book or an article or something for the next fifteen minutes. Jaehyun crept down from his top bunk as quietly as he could with the wooden frames creaking as they did. Once the other boy changed, he sat down on Johnny’s bed with him, and the two of them struck up a game of virtual checkers, being as quiet as they could.

There were more voices and sounds coming from around the cabins and campsite, and eventually there was a knock at their screen door. Johnny, Jaehyun, and almost every head in the room popped up at the noise. Johnny looked over to see Taeyong jolt awake at the sound, stirring suddenly.

“Jaehyun?” called Doyoung’s voice softly, and Jaehyun smiled as he abandoned his and Johnny’s game to go greet his boyfriend, or whatever Doyoung and Jaehyun were. Jaehyun picked up his flip flops and slipped outside as quietly as he could; as the screen door squeaked open, the rest of the people in the cabin finally roused.

Johnny’s eyes kept flitting to Taeyong, even though they shouldn’t. There was a burning feeling in his fingertips and ears as he watched Taeyong get up and swing his legs over the side of his bed, then shed his shirt, and put on a new one. He tried to focus on Ten, who drooped his arm over the side of his bunk and looked at Johnny.

“ _ What’s going on today _ ?” he moaned sleepily.

“ _ The hike, I think _ ,” Johnny answered him, “I’ve been waiting for you to get up, buddy. I want breakfast,” he said. Ten let out a very indignant and reluctant whine, but he got out of bed anyway, his hair a mess, like everyone else’s. When Ten was ready, he and Johnny left the cabin and went to the bathrooms before scoping out the breakfast situation.

The classes were going to split into groups. Half of the class were going to do the nature hike today, and the other half tomorrow. There were two destinations they could hike to, one of which had a waterfall.

Johnny immediately got his friends to agree to hike to the waterfall, not caring which group they were in. A nature hike just to see a great view of the island from near the top was cool, but a hike to a waterfall and crystal-clear freshwater lake was cooler. He was feeling really excited, especially when he was once again split into Taeyong’s group.

After breakfast, the students were given time to digest and pack their hiking bags, change their outfits, get on their sunscreen, and even take their notebooks to jot down a few things about the plants and animals they saw for their assignment. Johnny, Jaehyun, and Ten went back to their cabin to get ready, and Doyoung, Yuta, and Sicheng promised to meet up with them a little bit later.

Johnny had changed into long jeans, and the one pair of boots he had that were suitable for hiking in. His little backpack was packed well, and he was prepared to fill up his portable water bottle. He even had his camera around his neck too, excited to go on a hike. They met up with their friends and the other kids in their group at the picnic tables, and Taeyong came up to them with a happy grin. Their teacher was wearing jeans and black boots too, as well as a snapback to cover his eyes from the sun.

“You guys ready?” he asked them, “The hike is going to take about two hours, there and back. The wildlife people are going to meet us for lunch when we get to the spot, so we’ll stop, swim, eat, and then hike back. It’s going to take most of the day, so be sure you have everything,” he reminded them. When no one broke from the group to go get something they forgot, Taeyong exclaimed that they were all ready to go, and he pulled out a large paper map. The students all gathered around to see their route.

They actually left straight from the campsite, walking up the sand to the greenery on the edge of the beach and then onto a well beaten trail that seemed to be cut into the forest. A stone marker at the entrance read ‘four miles to waterfall’.

It was crazy to imagine the thick forested area that existed just beyond the beach they were just at. It felt like they were deep in the jungles of the Amazon, and Johnny briefly imagined all of them wearing Indiana Jones khakis and him holding a machete and slicing down vines in abandoned ruins, searching for lost treasure.

The walk wasn’t terribly hard. There were parts where the path narrowed, but the trail was pretty clear, walked upon often enough to keep the plants from growing onto the path and blurring the way. Johnny was capturing pictures at any given moment. The way the light streamed in from the treetops, beautiful flowers that popped from the ground, a bird or two.

They stopped every once in a while, and Taeyong head-counted them, Johnny did the same in silence, unable to stop himself from keeping track of the blended and temporary pack they made. Taeyong allowed them a moment to rest if they were tired, or to take a drink, or point out a plant or a spider web or something of that nature that a few students took the opportunity to take some notes on.

As they continued, they crossed an old wooden bridge over a small bubbling stream. The bridge was old and had moss growing on it, and Johnny got a quick picture of that too. From then on, the hike got more demanding, more uphill, and rocks to even maneuver over at one point. Johnny saw Doyoung wobble, and Johnny shot his arm out to grab his wrist and steady him.

“Be careful, everyone!” Taeyong called to them as he watched all his students successfully get through the rocky terrain. Doyoung shot him a grateful smile, and Johnny returned it.

The pathways got narrower, and they came to this part of the path that edged them along a rocky cliffside before taking them around the bend and up onto a bluff that looked down across the forest and beach. Taeyong called everyone to stop at the top of the trail once it widened out.

“Okay guys, we’ve reached the halfway point. Take a breather, and a drink if you need it,” he called as he hopped up onto a tree stump to see above everyone’s head. Johnny picked up his camera when he got to the top and turned to take a few pictures of the view of the ocean and the forest.

He heard Jaehyun and Doyoung talking to each other, and he heard Ten giggle about something to Yuta, when suddenly everyone gasped or shrieked. Johnny whipped around and scanned for his fellow students and saw that some of them had clustered around the place that Taeyong once stood.

“Oh, my God! Mr. Lee!”  “Are you alright!?” called about a dozen students.

Before Johnny could register anything else, he was pushing to the front of the small crowd, his heart sounding in his ears. Three students were on the ground, and so was Mr. Lee. The tree stump that he had been standing on had split down the middle and Taeyong was on his butt in the dirt, his one foot stuck in decaying stump. The look of shock and pain on Taeyong’s face made Johnny’s mind go blank.

He must have yelled ‘ _ Get back _ !’ because everyone scattered when he dropped to his knees. Taeyong’s eyes were wide and he looked like he was holding his breath. Johnny didn’t think. He gripped both sides of the already broken stump and ripped it into two parts, freeing his teacher’s foot. The dust from the dead plant rose into the air, and Johnny held his breath as he scooped Taeyong into his arms. He felt one of his teacher’s hands curl into his sleeve, and Johnny stood up, with all of Taeyong’s weight in his arms.

The people around him were whispering and asking questions.

“What happened?”  “Did you see it?” “He just  _ fell _ ...”  “Is he okay?”

Johnny planted his foot onto the remnants of the offensive tree stump and shoved it down the hill, making sure no one else could stand on it. He turned, and the crowd of students parted again as Johnny walked to the other end of the small clearing to get Taeyong away from anything that might break or hurt him. Johnny set Taeyong down on the stone land marker that said they were halfway between the beach and the waterfall, and he knelt down below his beloved teacher.

“What happened?” Johnny asked, breathless. Taeyong was gasping, his breaths erratic and hyper and both his hands were clenched on either of Johnny’s shoulders.

“My foot,” Taeyong hissed, his eyes watering, “I think I broke my foot.”

“Breathe,” Johnny reminded him, and he sat back, “which foot?” he asked. Taeyong swallowed, and Johnny could see it in his face that whatever had happened had hurt him a lot.

“L-Left,” Taeyong choked, “oh-oh, my God,” he whimpered.

“Someone bring him some water!” Johnny nearly snarled, and in a moment, Yuta was by their teacher’s side, a hand on his shoulder and a water bottle in his hand.

“It’s going to be okay,” Yuta said quietly, and Johnny moved to undo Taeyong’s high laced boot. The moment he pulled Taeyong’s foot up to prop on his knee, his teacher screeched in pain.

“Ahh!!  _ Fuck _ !” Taeyong cursed, and Johnny’s blood ran cold at the sound. It must have shaken everyone in the group too because in that moment everyone fell silent. It had to have been excruciating for a teacher to curse like that around his students. Johnny shushed him quietly, hoping it came out soothing, as he slowly undid every lace on Taeyong’s boot, pulling the string through every loop. As the lace was undone completely and Johnny pulled back the tongue, he put one hand on the back of Taeyong’s knee and his other on the heel of the boot.

“Mr. Lee?” Johnny asked quietly, and Taeyong opened one eye to look at him, “I’m going to take off your shoe. What was the name of that book you were talking about in class last week?” he asked, as a distraction. As soon at Taeyong took a steadying breath and answered the question, Johnny swiftly pulled off the boot.

Taeyong stopped halfway through what he was saying and his nails dug into Johnny’s arm at the pain. After about three seconds of complete silence, Taeyong’s head bowed, and he let out the most broken sound Johnny had ever heard, and it ripped through his soul to know that he caused that pain just then.

“ _ Oooh… _ ” winced a voice from behind Johnny as he looked down at his teacher’s foot.

Taeyong’s socks only went to his ankle, and Johnny swallowed stiffly at the sight. Everyone could see how unnaturally swollen it looked and it had only been a minute since he had fallen. There was a multicolored bruise that was beginning to bloom all around Taeyong’s ankle.

“Ohh, fuck, it  _ hurts _ ,” Taeyong whispered again as he looked down at his own leg. Johnny nodded his head as a plan started to rewrite itself in his mind.

“You need a hospital. We need to go back,” Johnny said, and immediately there were outbursts from the group of students behind him.

“No way!”  “We’re already halfway!”  “We came all this way!”

As Johnny heard their complaints, he slowly let Taeyong’s leg relax, making sure it didn’t bump into anything else, before he stood up. The other students were squawking and complaining, and Johnny felt his eyes turn red with annoyance. He took off his backpack, and dropped it on the dirt trail unceremoniously, before squaring his shoulders and standing up to his full height.

“Everyone, _ shut up _ !!” Johnny bellowed, and the whole group quieted, “Buddy up, right  _ now _ !” he ordered, and everyone looked around and immediately took hold of their partner or friend, “Did anyone bring a cellphone?” he asked. The students who had them quietly searched for their phones and pulled them out, but after a quick hush, it seemed that they were in a dead zone and no one had service, “Okay, listen up!” Johnny called, taking charge, “From this moment onward, you and your buddy are a  _ unit _ . Do not step on rocks, or tree stumps, or anything that even looks  _ remotely  _ dangerous. Sicheng and… Bae Joohyun,” Johnny delegated, pointing out the only two other alphas in the group, “You two are going to lead the group the rest of the way to the waterfall. The trails are clearly marked, so no one should have any excuse if they get lost. When the campsite people get there, tell them what happened…” Johnny breathed out, “I’m going to walk Mr. Lee back down the trail.”

There was a murmur through the students before Jaehyun stepped forward.

“You shouldn’t go alone. I’ll walk back with you,” he offered.

“I’ll go back too,” said another student, a female beta named Kang Seulgi, who was friends with Joohyun, “strength in numbers,” she added. Johnny took a deep breath and nodded.

“Yeah, it’s safer if we go in a group,” he conceded before he turned back to Sicheng and Joohyun, a female alpha who Johnny liked because she didn’t let anyone push her around, “You guys can do this, just stay on the trail, and keep a headcount.”

Sicheng nodded, but Joohyun took the lead, clapping her hands and gathering the rest of her fellow students and making sure everyone had a buddy and they were accounted for.

“Wait,” said Ten, and Johnny turned back to the Thai boy who jogged over to him and Mr. Lee and set down his own bag. The class waited as Ten pulled out ibuprofen tablets and shook two of them out into his hand and held them out for Taeyong to take, “This will help with the pain for now,” Ten said, and Taeyong tentatively took the pills.

“Let me have one more,” Taeyong gasped out. Ten shook out one more red coated pill, and Taeyong threw them all back into his mouth before taking the water bottle the other omega held out for him and swallowed them down. Ten wished Taeyong and Johnny good luck and then went back to rejoin the group who was intent on continuing up the trail.

Johnny turned back to Mr. Lee who was slumping over on the stone sign, examining his own damaged ankle after taking the pills, and Johnny got back down on his knees to rearrange the things in his own bag so he could fit Taeyong’s boot in it.

“I’ll carry your backpack,” Jaehyun offered, and Johnny agreed. He wrapped his camera up as safely as he could in his swim trunks and placed that in his backpack as well. He stood back up and turned his back to his teacher, bending down to Taeyong’s height.

“C’mon, Mr. Lee,” Johnny said, and he felt Taeyong’s tentative hands take his shoulders. Johnny hooked his hands under his teacher’s knees gently before lifting him up from his stone seat. Johnny felt Taeyong’s arms wind around his chest and his thighs grip his waist, and Johnny breathed in the smell of his teacher for a split second before he forced his mind back to the current situation.

Jaehyun lead the way as he, Seulgi, Johnny, and Taeyong started their way back to the campsite. Taeyong seemed to melt into Johnny’s back after a few minutes, and Johnny knew both of them must have smelt stressed, but at least his presence allowed Taeyong a little bit of relief or comfort.

The walk downhill was slow. Johnny had to be careful not to jostle his teacher too much, hearing his intakes of breath and small pained squeaks when Johnny took a harsh step. They got to the rocky part of the trail again, and Johnny had to take each step like he was walking on glass, afraid to slip and hurt himself or Taeyong. Jaehyun kept turning back to check on him, and Johnny could see the concern in his friend’s eyes. After about fifteen minutes, Jaehyun stopped the group.

“This isn’t working,” he said, and Johnny stopped, although it was a waste of time.

“Then, what do you suggest we do?” Johnny asked. He tried not to sound annoyed, but he could feel how hot it was becoming, and he just wanted to get Taeyong back to camp so he could get the medical attention he needed.

“We’ve just gotten past the worst part of the hike, but you and Mr. Lee are slow. Let me and Seulgi go on ahead,” Jaehyun reasoned, but Johnny shook his head.

“No, it’s safer to stay together.”

“With every minute, Mr. Lee’s ankle is getting darker and darker. You were right when you said he needs a hospital, Johnny,” Jaehyun said, and Johnny felt Taeyong raise his head to look at his student, “His foot might be broken, and he’s going to need x-rays. If Seulgi and I book it back, we can tell the other adults, and use a phone to call an ambulance. By the time you and Mr. Lee get to camp, the ambulance might already be there, and he won’t need to wait to see a doctor,” Jaehyun said, and Taeyong let out a heavy sigh.

“I’m sorry,” their teacher moaned out, and Johnny felt his heart break.

“Don’t apologize. It was an accident,” Johnny said.

“...Jaehyun is right,” Taeyong said after a second, “You’ll make much better time if you go on ahead.”

Jaehyun nodded and took off Johnny’s backpack. He rooted around inside, took out Johnny’s water bottle, and had Taeyong hold it before zipping it up and putting the backpack back on his shoulder.

“Okay,” Jaehyun said, “You guys be safe, and stay on the trail.”

“You be safe too,” Johnny said, and Jaehyun gave him a reassuring smile before he and Seulgi started down the hill at a much quicker pace than Johnny could match right now. The alpha student was about to hoist his teacher up higher to continue walking on, but Taeyong stopped him.

“Let’s take a break,” he breathed out. Johnny agreed; he was willing to push himself to get down to the campsite quickly, but if Taeyong suggested it, then he wouldn’t argue. Johnny found a downed tree and kicked it a couple times to test it stability before he turned around. Taeyong eased himself down off his back and hobbled on one foot before he lowered himself down to sit on the tree. Johnny took a seat next to him as Taeyong unscrewed the cap on the water bottle and had a few large gulps.

They sat in silence for a moment, and Taeyong handed him the water bottle, which Johnny sipped from too.

“Are you okay?” Johnny asked quietly, and Taeyong shook his head.

“Ten gave me those pills, but I don’t think they’ve kicked in yet,” he answered, “my foot and ankle are throbbing.”

“Can you move your toes?” Johnny asked, and both him and Taeyong looked down at his swollen, purple ankle. Taeyong managed to wiggle his toes just a little bit.

“Yeah, but it hurts…” Taeyong grimaced.

“That’s good though, it means your foot probably isn’t broken,” Johnny said, “Whenever you’re ready,” he offered. Taeyong drew in a big breath through his nose and sighed. Johnny, now alone with the object of his affection, let his eyes settle softly onto Taeyong’s face.

“Thank you,” Taeyong whispered weakly, “for offering to carry me back.”

“I wish… I could have been beside you… maybe I could have caught you before you fell,” the alpha murmured. Taeyong sniffed and reached his hand up to his collar where he tugged down his shirtfront and pulled out the silver chain Johnny had got him two months ago for White Day, his fingers looped around it as he tugged it away from his neck.

“You may not know it, but you’re  _ always _ beside me, Johnny,” Taeyong admitted in a shallow whisper, “and I was really touched when you took control of the situation and helped me back up,” he said. Johnny sucked in a controlled breath as his aching heart started pumping harder. He leaned closer and knocked his forehead against Taeyong’s temple. His teacher stilled for a second before letting out a shaky breath. It was as close at Johnny could get, alone in the forest, desperately wanting to do more for someone he couldn't get too close to. Johnny squeezed his eyes shut and hoped that his feelings could reach his teacher without him having to say it.

Taeyong’s shoulders relaxed, and he turned his chin down to push back against the weight of the alpha boy, holding each other up. They both sat there, connected, and breathed together for a few long heartbeats. They lingered in the quiet sounds of the forest and the smell of each other’s scents.

“I can’t wait for this school year to be  _ over _ ,” Johnny admitted with a weak growl, and Taeyong smiled, laughing just a little bit at Johnny’s honesty.

“Me too,” he agreed, “This has been all too difficult.”

“But, we’re on the home stretch. Less than a month to go,” Johnny said, words he’s said to himself a hundred times over.

“Yeah,” Taeyong admitted and pulled away first, leaning back himself, “it’s a good thing no one else found out. That has made this so much easier to bear,” Taeyong said, and a wave of guilt fell over Johnny. He leaned back and looked Taeyong in the eye. He had been meaning to tell Taeyong about Jaehyun’s realization since January, but the right time never presented itself. He didn’t want to lie to Taeyong. What little trust they had built up, Johnny felt he needed to maintain.

“Jaehyun knows,” Johnny blurted out, and before Taeyong could question him, Johnny went ahead and said, “I didn’t tell him. He figured it out by himself right before parent teacher conferences. I tried denying it, but Jaehyun connected all of the dots. He swore to me he wouldn’t tell though, and he hasn’t, so… I trust him,” Johnny said, ready for Taeyong’s reprimand, ready to have this whole secret tower of lies come crumbling down. Taeyong sat back and looked at Johnny for a moment before looking away into the forest.

“That makes sense,” Taeyong said with a soft nod. Johnny’s brain did a double take, and he blinked rapidly, trying to catch up, “I knew Jaehyun liked you, so it’s not surprising he figured it out, but he’s much better at keeping it together than I realized,” Taeyong said, and Johnny looked up into the sky for divine help.

“Are you  _ serious _ ?” Johnny asked, “Was I the  _ only  _ one who didn’t know Jaehyun liked me?”

“Probably,” Taeyong answered honestly with another small laugh, “But I’m the teacher, I see everything. I know exactly who likes who,” he reminded Johnny before taking the water bottle out of Johnny’s loose hands and taking another swig. He wiped his mouth with the back of his wrist before he spoke again, “but… if Jaehyun has known since January and no one else knows, that means that Jaehyun was telling the truth, he kept the secret.”

“So… you’re not mad?” Johnny asked. Taeyong drew in a breath but shook his head on the exhale.

“No,” he answered truthfully, “I’m not mad. It’s  _ way _ too late for me to be mad.”

“I’m sorry,” Johnny said, and Taeyong looked up at him reassuringly.

“It’s not your fault,” his teacher said. He and Johnny sat in the shade for another minute more in complete silence. The itch Johnny had to ask about Taeyong’s heat suppressants rose up within him again, and he didn’t know if there would ever be a better time, alone in the woods, hundreds of miles from the school.

“Can I ask you a personal question?” Johnny asked softly. Taeyong looked up at him, but Johnny couldn’t bring himself to look him in the eye right then, “You can deny me, I’d understand.”

“What’s your question?” Taeyong asked. Johnny started picking at the bark on the tree they were sitting on.

“I wanted to ask you about… the heat suppressant conversation last night…” Johnny murmured.

“Ah,” Taeyong said and leaned back, “So you overheard that, huh?” he asked, and Johnny merely nodded.

“You can not answer, I’d understand. I’m just… I don’t know, worried and curious?” Johnny conjured up, expressing his mixed feelings as best he could.

“I’m… going to choose not to answer,” Taeyong said, and Johnny’s heart dropped, “It’s my business. Not yours, or any other student’s for that matter. Discussing a matter like that with you… crosses too many lines.”

Johnny let out a small discontented sigh, but he figured that would be the answer. His shoulders stooped, and he felt the unease of helplessness rise within him as he stared into Taeyong’s soft brown eyes. He knew there was something going on, and there was a reason Taeyong avoided the answer, but he held his tongue.

“…Don’t look at me like that,” Taeyong whispered, his head tilting, and Johnny saw the hurt in Taeyong’s eyes. The uncomfortable, emotional agony of continuously holding something you want away from you. Johnny thought about how easy it would be to give in, to lean in close and kiss him. Pull him close by the nape of his neck. His eyes caught Taeyong swallow, and his teacher’s eyes fell to his lips, and he knew Taeyong was thinking the same thing. But that thought, the idea that Taeyong maybe wanted to kiss him as much as Johnny did, was too sinful.

It felt like punishment when Taeyong looked away, breaking another almost moment between them.

In a long, heart-shattering pause, Johnny weighed the consequences of their relationship. It would have been better had Johnny never gone to Korea and Taeyong had not have to deal with him, but all the truths between them were so unavoidable. Johnny hoped the ache he felt now would be worth it in the end.

After a minute of silence, Taeyong stated that they better keep moving.

~

As Johnny and Taeyong finally got to the end of the trail, Johnny’s legs were overworked and his arms hurt from carrying the omega man the whole way. His breath was coming out hard, and walking through the sand was much more difficult than walking down the dirt trail, but he was determined to see it through to the end. He needed to prove to himself, and to Taeyong, that he could.

Kim Jungwoo, two other teachers, and a handful of students came running towards them on the beach as Johnny and Taeyong made their way back to camp.

“Are you two alright?!” Jungwoo asked as he skidded to a halt next to Johnny and started walking with them.

“I’m alright,” Taeyong said reflexively.

“Except you may have broken your foot?” Jaehyun stated the obvious, “the ambulance is on their way, they should be here any second now.”

Johnny didn’t let anyone take Taeyong from him until they got back to camp. He shook his head when Jungwoo reached for his colleague, and Taeyong’s arms tightened around his shoulders when he felt hands try and make their way between them. Johnny was determined to make it all the way back. He made it up to the first picnic table at their campsite, turned around, and set Taeyong on the top of the table softly, concluding their trial, and making sure Taeyong didn’t have to do anything else but relax and wait.

As their bodies peeled apart from each other and Taeyong’s arms unwound from his chest and shoulders, Johnny felt the sweat on his back meet the cool air and his arms relaxed. He flopped into the seat next to Taeyong at the table as everyone else came up to see Mr. Lee and his hurt foot, and Johnny felt a loss at their connection. As hard as it was to carry Taeyong all the way down the trail, he would do it all over again to be able to support his weight again and to be the one he could rely on when he was hurt.

Jaehyun sat next to him and handed Johnny a cold water bottle fresh from the ice box, and Johnny drained it quickly, not realizing how thirsty he was. True to Jaehyun’s word, the lights of an ambulance pulled onto the beach and up to the campsite. Two EMT’s hopped out of the van and jogged up to the group, asking which one was hurt. Everyone stepped back from Taeyong, who raised his hand halfheartedly. Johnny saw how tired his teacher was already as he answered their questions, and then they left to go get a gurney so they could shuttle him to the hospital for x-rays. The EMT’s then asked if anyone was going to go with him to the hospital. A quick debate broke out amongst the chaperones of the field trip, and Johnny had to hold his tongue.

As much as Johnny wanted to go to the hospital with Taeyong, he knew it would be suspicious. The teachers and parents were arguing over who was going to ride along with him, and Johnny felt his heart squeeze in his chest.

It should be him. Johnny knew he was the one who should go. It made the most sense in his biased mind, but he couldn’t speak up. He had done enough, and to keep his feelings in the dark, he had to stay back even though his instincts told him to stay with Taeyong.

He felt a grip on his shoulder, and Johnny looked up to see Jaehyun stand up from the seat next to him.

“I’ll go,” Jaehyun said, quieting the adults in the group, “It makes no sense to send another supervisor. That’s just one less adult watching the other seventy or eighty students here. We already outnumber you, and we need more parental hands here,” Jaehyun reasoned, making all the other teachers and parents murmur in reluctant agreement, “besides, I’m in Mr. Lee’s class and his cabin. I’ll go.”

“Jaehyun, you don’t have to come with me,” Taeyong finally spoke up, “I can go alone.”

“Don’t say that,” Jaehyun said charmingly, “hospitals are so  _ boring _ , and you’ll be waiting around forever. If you had me there, we could play games to pass the time, and once they give you  _ really _ good painkillers, we can talk about what kind of questions are going to be on the final,” Jaehyun said with a cheeky smile, making Taeyong laugh and shake his head.

“Don’t push your luck,” he smiled, “but fine. You can come with. He’s right, anyway. It is better for the adults to stay behind with the remaining students.”

“Then it’s settled?” Jaehyun said, “You want me to go grab our pajamas?” he asked, and Taeyong nodded thankfully as the EMT’s rolled the gurney through the sand and out to the picnic table. Jaehyun turned to jog back to their cabin, and Johnny shot Taeyong one little look before he got up to follow his friend. Once they were in the cabin alone, Johnny stopped Jaehyun.

“Hey. I know what you’re doing, and thanks,” Johnny said, and Jaehyun smiled back at him.

“Not a problem, man. I’m worried about Mr. Lee too,” Jaehyun said, “I’ll bring my phone with me so I can keep you updated.”

“I don’t even think I can get texts out here, but thank you for trying anyway,” Johnny said, and Jaehyun had a bundle of pajamas in his arms. Before he left, Johnny reminded him to take Taeyong’s pills. Jaehyun nodded and rifled through Taeyong’s bag again and pulled out a pill bottle.

“Good thinking,” Jaehyun said, and the two of them left the cabin again. Taeyong was already in the back of the open ambulance when they came back. He was propped up, secured, and the EMT’s were waiting for Jaehyun who ran up and immediately hopped into the open ambulance doors with the bundle of clothes in his arm. Johnny followed him and put his hand on the ambulance door, the teachers and other students behind him. Taeyong smiled at him.

“You helped so much today, Youngho,” Taeyong said, reverting to his easiest mask to remind them of their distance, “Thank you,” Taeyong said sincerely, and Johnny nodded.

The class and teachers stood back and waved as the doors to the ambulance shut, and then they drove away down the sand. They could see Jaehyun’s face and hand as he waved from the back of the medical van. Johnny felt his physical and emotional exhaustion set in, and all he wanted was a shower and then a nap. He got Ten to go with him to take a shower, and then he ate a little bit of the lunch that the campsite served, before he retreated to his cabin and crashed onto his bunk, his phone close by in case he got any reports from his friend.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOLY GOD I'm almost done with this fic. It's been wild. I've really proud of it. Plesase leave a review, i would love you if you did.  
> I was told by my good friend Dia, (Cleonheart on ao3 and Neocleontech on twitter) that I should tell ya'll that I too have a twitter. I have very few followers, but that's fine by me, follow me if you'd like n.n  
> My twitter is NeoCopperTech.  
> I'm so ready for the finale, I'm writing the second to last chapter as you read this.  
> After I'm done with JSA, I can focus on writing the Dojae I've been planning... <3


	11. The Final Weeks of School

At dinner time, he got a text from Jaehyun that said ‘ _ He’s been seen. We’re waiting for the x-rays to develop. Hanging in there _ .’ and a picture attached of the two of them, Taeyong in the hospital bed with his foot elevated in a sling and Jaehyun sitting in a chair next to the bed. They both posed with their thumbs up, but Johnny could see how tired they both looked, Taeyong in particular.

He showed the other teachers the photo and then went around showing everyone else who asked. Johnny went to bed that evening staring at the empty spot in the bunk next to his and missing the feeling of Jaehyun rolling around in the bed above him. He didn’t think he was ever going to find sleep, his mind too worried, but he succumbed pretty late in the night. He woke up twice, checking the cabin for the return of his teacher and friend, but they had yet to come back.

Johnny checked his phone each time he woke and was disheartened to see no messages from Jaehyun.

A couple hours later, right as dawn was approaching, the sounds of feet, and something clunking could be heard from outside their cabin. Johnny opened his eyes and focused on the two people in the doorway.

Jaehyun and Taeyong were back, Taeyong in crutches with a bulky splint on his leg from the knee down and Jaehyun trying to hold the door and also help Taeyong up the steps. Johnny leapt from his bed, shirtless, and went to Taeyong’s side immediately. Taeyong’s smell, muddled and strained, filled his nose and calmed Johnny by just an increment.

Without speaking, Johnny took one of the crutches from his teacher, ducked himself down to Taeyong’s height to loop his arm around his teacher’s waist, and pull Taeyong’s arm across his shoulders, supporting the rest of his teacher’s weight. Taeyong said nothing and didn’t protest as he leaned into his student’s side and allowed himself to be half-carried the rest of the way to his bed. Johnny heard Mr. Lee take in a long breath through his nose, breathing in Johnny’s scent as the alpha student guided him to his bed.

Johnny helped Taeyong down, and the two of them made eye contact that made Johnny’s hair stand on end.

Taeyong was clearly drained of energy and had probably little to no sleep at the hospital. By the way he smelled, Johnny could tell he had also had some sort of medication in his blood, and the way Taeyong smiled at him, reassuringly and lovingly, made Johnny have to turn away.

Jaehyun had both the crutches and set them against the side of Taeyong’s bunk, wordlessly handing Johnny the reigns. Johnny watched his friend shuck his shirt and jeans off in the middle of the cold cabin and then crawl up the ladder and into his bunk.

Before Jaehyun could check out, Johnny peered over the bar of his bed and gave Jaehyun a quiet ‘thank you,’ and they knocked their knuckles together before Jaehyun rolled over to catch some sleep. Johnny turned back to Taeyong and saw that he was trying to take off the pajama pants he had worn to the hospital that night, and it was getting stuck on his leg splint. Johnny bent down to sit on the foot of Taeyong’s bed, and he silently put his hand over Taeyong’s. When his teacher stopped his struggling, Johnny zeroed his gaze in on the splint and then help take Taeyong’s baggy sweatpants off, stretching the material over the plastic and metal holding his leg in place.

Johnny heard Taeyong breathing and felt his gaze on him, but he didn’t dare look up past his teacher’s knee. The implications of taking off his teacher’s pants, them both sitting there in their underwear, and everyone else asleep around them was too risky for Johnny.

“What did the doctors say?” Johnny whispered, and Taeyong sat back a little, “Is it broken?” he asked as quietly as he could.

“No… I fractured my shin. The break was pretty clean, at least that’s what they told me…” Taeyong whispered back, his voice sounded breathy and hoarse.

“How long do you have to wear the…?” and Johnny tapped the hard plastic of the splint down by the toes, afraid any greater sensation might hurt Taeyong.

“Six to eight weeks,” he answered. Johnny nodded, still avoiding his eyes, but then Taeyong’s slender hand reached over and covered his, and Johnny finally looked back up at his gorgeous but sleep deprived face.

“Thank you… for yesterday,” his teacher murmured, “your quick thinking and maturity in such a hectic situation… it was very admirable,” he said, and Johnny watched Mr. Lee’s shoulders droop as his need for sleep was sinking over him. Johnny wanted to stay as close as possible, wanted to wrap Taeyong in an embrace and not let go until he was fast asleep and the sun rose high, but Johnny swallowed that thought.

“I’m just happy you’re okay,” Johnny whispered, reluctantly pulled his hand out from under his teacher’s, and then ducked out from his bunk. The sun was just beginning to lighten the sky, and people would be waking soon. Johnny knew he had to put physical distance between them.

He went back to his own bunk, and even though they were only four or five feet apart, it felt like continents and oceans between them. Johnny settled back into his sleeping bag, and Taeyong slowly lowered himself down onto his own bed, finally resting his head on a pillow. He stretched his legs out and lay on his back, and Johnny laid near him, watching for his tension to leave him. The moment Taeyong had found sleep, Johnny’s body allowed him to rest too.

~

The next day, Jaehyun and Taeyong had an extremely late start, and Johnny made sure to hover around the food prep area to save them both breakfasts. The other teachers were talking about what they were going to do since they were down a teacher, and Johnny overheard Jungwoo tell them all that Taeyong would decide what he wants to do. Johnny let his respect for Jungwoo rise just a little bit.

Since Johnny and his group had done the hike yesterday, today was their day to do nothing at camp and enjoy their senior vacation. Johnny sat at the picnic tables with Sicheng, Yuta, Doyoung, and Ten and looked at the pictures they had all taken on their phones of the waterfall Johnny didn’t get to see yesterday.

Ten told him that they would sit around and do their projects today, write their paragraphs and draw their pictures. They were talking about the assignment when Johnny got a strong whiff of his teacher and turned his head to see Taeyong hobbling down the sand with his crutches and plastic leg brace.

Everyone immediately asked him how he was, and Taeyong got to the first picnic table in range of him and sat, letting his crutches drop down into the sand behind him.

“I’m alright. Mostly, I’m sore and hungry,” he said, “and these things are such a pain to walk with,” Johnny saw Jungwoo go over with a plate of food for him and a bottled coffee, and Johnny felt prickled when Jungwoo did that thing where he sat too close for Johnny’s comfort, his broad shoulders pulling in and over Taeyong, physically sheltering him. It made the hair on the back of Johnny’s neck stand on end, and he tried not to let his lip curl as he saw Jungwoo’s lips move, his voice too low for him to hear.

“Oh, I’m not going  _ anywhere _ ,” Taeyong laughed above Jungwoo, “No, I’m on beach duty. I’m going to put down a towel, and sit under an umbrella, and do  _ literally _ nothing. The doctor said rest and recovery for the first week, and I intend to do just that.”

Johnny was happy to hear Taeyong settling back into his normal self as he sat with the other teachers and parents and tried to enjoy himself and not let anyone dote on him too much just because he was injured.

Johnny kept a partial eye out for his teacher and watched one of the parents help him with his towel and beach umbrella, and Taeyong made his own little nest on the sand facing the ocean. A few other students came and sat with Mr. Lee too, keeping him company, until they were called to go on their nature walk.

Johnny and his friends each did their assignment, and after a little beach swimming before lunch, Johnny found himself gravitating back to Taeyong. He suggested to his group that they go relax and sit next to their teacher for a while and keep him company, and they brought their towels and some snacks. Johnny brought his tablet and a water bottle for his teacher, and he took the opportunity to sit down next to him and offered to play a game on his tablet with him. Two minutes into a game of virtual chess, Johnny laughed.

“You made fun of me for bringing my tablet here yesterday and look where you are now.”

“Laugh it up,” Mr. Lee teased back, “because in ten minutes I’m going to win this game of chess, and then you’re gonna say ‘ _ best two out of three? _ ’ and then I’ll win again just in time for lunch,” Taeyong said with a sly look in his eye, and Yuta looked over at the two of them with an impressed smile.

“Mr. Lee’s a  _ savage _ ,” he said. Ten nearly snorted up the water he had just taken a drink from, and Jaehyun barked with laughter at Ten’s reaction, lifting the mood completely. Even though Mr. Lee’s accident had shaken the whole camping trip the day before, Taeyong had showed so much grace in his bounce-back that no one was worried come the end of the day.

That night, Johnny watched Taeyong take a large pain reliever at dinner, and twenty minutes later, he asked Jungwoo to escort him back to his cabin. Johnny couldn’t find an appropriate moment to slip away and check on his teacher, and he was forced to stay up with the rest of his classmates, even though he itched to return to their bunks and make sure Taeyong was alright.

Because it was the last night of their trip, and they were going home tomorrow, they stayed up pretty late around the bonfires and had more toasted s’mores. Finally, Ten announced that he was tired, and Johnny immediately got up to go back to their cabin for the night.

When they arrived, it was dark inside, but Johnny could smell Taeyong’s scent and the heavy medication he had taken that accompanied it. Johnny went to his bed and spied Mr. Lee fast asleep in a heap on his back. Johnny slowly got undressed, his eyes not leaving Taeyong’s form as he watched his beloved teacher breathe slowly, and the alpha boy’s tension unwound.

“What’s wrong?” Ten whispered, and Johnny’s head snapped up quickly, his eyes big as he stared into Ten’s face. The silver haired omega was peering down at him curiously from the top bunk, his flimsy sleep shirt already falling down his shoulder.

“Nothing,” Johnny answered, “lost in thought,” he said and knelt down to get inside his duffle, “thinking about tomorrow,” he added, trying to brush off his odd behavior and the way he had stared at his teacher.

“Ah,” Ten said, knowingly, “I get it,” he whispered. Johnny heard him rustle in his bed, and he looked up to see Ten lay down in his bunk, his gaze no longer on Johnny, “I’m kinda sad we’re leaving tomorrow. I could use another day,” he mused, and Johnny hummed slightly, agreeing with him.

Johnny slipped into his sleeping bag, keeping his eye on Taeyong, who hadn’t moved a muscle. It took a long time for Johnny to fall asleep, and he heard every other boy who shared their cabin come in at some point and get in their beds. Johnny was probably the last one asleep that night.

~

“ _ I’ve booked your flight back home. I’ll email you your boarding pass tonight. I’ve invited some of your old friends over for a welcome home party the day after you fly in. I’m really looking forward to seeing my high-school graduate and having you meet Julia. You’re going to like her _ .”

Johnny tried not to sigh, he couldn’t let his father hear how bemused he was. This conversation was far too tedious, and he had barely spoken, just listened to his dad talk at him through the phone. The second he had got back to the mainland and his cellphone service picked up again, he was flooded with incoming missed calls and texts from his grandma and his father. Once he had gotten home safely, he decided to bite the bullet and call back his father while their time-zones matched up.

“Sounds good, Dad. I’m flying out the second week of June and I’m coming back…?”

“ _ At the end of June. I want you here for a full two weeks. We’re going to go to the aquarium, and we’re going to drive some fancy cars, eat at great restaurants, and you’re going to come to work with me one of those days and see your old man in action. I have an excellent case I’m working on, and you’re going to come and see me on my battlefield. I’m sure you’ll be ready to join me at my firm once you see what I do in person _ .”

“Right. Sounds cool,” Johnny forced himself to say, “If there’s anything playing at the opera house one of those days, can we go?” he asked.

“ _ I don’t see why not _ ,” his father said joyously, “ _ Julia would like to go see an opera _ ,” he mused for a moment.

“…Hey, Dad?” Johnny asked, “In about three weeks, there’s going to be a grand, musical showcase here at my high school. A lot of influential musicians and scouters are going to be there, and I’m the opening performer… and I’m playing two pieces for accompaniment with some singers. I’ve been practicing hard for the last few months, and it would mean a lot to me if you could take a couple days off and come see me play. If you brought Julia, that would be even better,” Johnny asked, but he didn’t have high hopes.

“ _ Send me the dates and times, and I’ll see what I can do _ ,” his dad said, and Johnny was shocked he wasn’t getting any lip for it being a piano performance. His father must be in quite the good mood.

“I will,” Johnny said, astonished and hopeful.

“ _ Will your mother be there? _ ” his father asked.

“I haven’t told her about it yet... I wanted to ask you first,” Johnny said, truthfully, but also because he hadn’t spoken to his mother in months since their last fight and wasn’t sure if he even wanted her to come.

“ _ Hm _ ,” he answered, and Johnny knew that was a hard-deciding factor for him.

“I don’t want Mom there,” Johnny admitted, “She made a fool of herself, and of me, at the parent teacher conferences. She can’t hold her shit together, she just embarrasses me, and  _ not _ in a good way.”

Johnny heard a long, exasperated sigh from over the receiver, and then his father said something Johnny never thought he would ever hear. He always knew it, but he had never heard his dad say it before.

“ _ You know… it was never your fault that your mother and I had a divorce. You were always a wonderful kid, John. Her problems with drinking came way before you were old enough to realize _ ,” his father said, “ _ I can’t say I handled it well. I pulled away when she acted like that, and I wanted to hold on for your sake, but I… wasn’t good at being a husband to her, and as a result, I wasn’t as good of a father to you _ ,” he said, and Johnny covered his mouth with his hand. His grandmother who was across the table from him, mouthed the word ‘ _ What? _ ’ at him, and Johnny looked away so he could focus on the things his father was saying to him, “ _ I ran from her problems, and as a result I left you alone with her. I shouldn’t have made you go through so many years with a mother like that. I should have divorced her much sooner and taken you with me, but I didn’t. I regret that, and I’m sorry, son. _ ”

“Wow… thank you, Dad,” Johnny managed out, his eyes beginning to water, “It’s not too late, you know… hearing that means the  _ world _ to me. Thank you.”

“ _ You’re welcome. You’re my boy, and I love you… send me the dates to your performance, and I’ll try to clear my schedule _ .”

“I will… I love you, too,” Johnny said with a brimming smile.

“ _ Be good to your grandma _ ,” he finished. Johnny said goodbye, and they each hung up the phone. When Johnny looked up, his grandma was staring at him with wide eyes, neither of them expecting the conversation to turn like that.

“He… he  _ apologized _ ,” Johnny gasped out, “And he told me that I wasn’t the reason they got divorced. I can’t believe that just happened.”

“Oh,  _ John-ah _ … you didn’t think you were the reason, did you?” his grandma asked as she got out of her seat to cross the room to her grandson. Johnny shook his head.

“No, but it really… it feels  _ really _ good to hear him say it,” Johnny sobbed once. His grandma came to his side and hugged his shoulders, and Johnny nuzzled himself into her embrace. It wasn’t a sad crying moment, but one of overflowing emotion. His heart felt full, and he could only hope he’d see his father at the showcase in a few weeks. It was one of the first times he was looking forward to seeing his dad in years.

~

Watching Mr. Lee clunk around campus on his crutches made Johnny’s instinctual need to perform as an alpha reach almost unstoppable levels. After carrying him down the trail that weekend, Johnny’s want to help and carry him everywhere nagged at him every time he saw Taeyong hopping around with his crutches and splinted leg held up behind him.

Johnny had noticed a few students were helping him carry his bookbag or papers into class every day, and Taeyong had taken up sitting on the edge of his desk for nearly all of class and having someone at the front of the class pass out his papers for him. Johnny knew he couldn’t do it every day, but he had taken up a new ritual of hanging around outside by the staff parking lot a couple days a week, watching for his teacher’s silver car so he could offer his hands and walk with him to class.

Since it was warmer out now with Summer approaching, hanging around outside wasn’t suspicious or out of the ordinary in the slightest, most students were soaking up the late springtime air and sunshine before going inside for classes.

The few times Johnny and Taeyong had accidentally been close to each other since the camping trip made palpable sparks kindle between them. Taeyong was avoiding his gaze at every opportunity, putting distance between them more adamantly, and Johnny tried not to feel bruised over it.

His only solace was the evidence of Taeyong’s scent on the clothes he continued to leave for him. Every Friday evening without fail, and every Monday morning habitually Johnny would slip the garment back into his bag or locker.

Johnny clung to that like it was his only lifeline.

~

Two weeks before the musical showcase, the music and dance club became intense. The part of the club that was focused heavily on singing was divided from the dancers. The choir room was bursting with harmonic chimes of all the voices as they practiced their pieces, and the soloists took their turns practicing as well in front of their peers.

Johnny had been working with Doyoung, Taeil, and another female singer on their solo pieces, both powerful ballads alongside his piano playing.

Ten and Winwin were performing a contemporary duet together and were working under Mr. Kim. Mark, much to everyone’s surprise, landed a full dancing solo in freestyle which Taeyong was supposed to be coaching him on. Since Taeyong’s injury, he was no longer able to command the hip-hop choreography for any pieces, and Miss Kwon had to take over and finish his dance numbers.

When Miss Kwon asked Taeyong to supervise Johnny’s private practice in the auditorium, Mr. Lee stared at her for a moment like he didn’t quite hear her but then agreed. Johnny’s heart pounded as the two of them left the dance room together, Johnny carrying his music books with him.

Since the choir room was full, same with both dance rooms, they went to practice in the auditorium where the showcase was going to take place. It would be the first time the two of them were alone since the camping trip, and Johnny was holding his tongue.

The two of them were silent aside from the rhythmic, metallic thumping of Taeyong’s steps with his crutches. They went to the auditorium together, and as much as Johnny wanted to speak, he couldn’t think of anything to say.

The auditorium was dim, and the curtains were drawn closed. Johnny hopped onto the stage ahead of Taeyong and slipped behind the curtain to find the light switches. The lights were already illuminated behind the closed curtain, and the gorgeous black showcase piano was in center stage. Johnny went back out to where he left Taeyong in the aisle and poked his head around the curtain.

“I think we’re a go up here. It’s all set up,” he said quietly, his voice traveling in the auditorium, and Taeyong made his way over to the steps on the side of the stage. Johnny reached his hand out to help him up, but Taeyong politely refused with a small ‘no thank you.’ Johnny retracted his hand awkwardly.

Johnny went and pulled out the bench at the piano and took a seat. He wondered for a second if he should find a folding chair and bring it over for his teacher, but Mr. Lee’s approaching steps beat him to it. Taeyong sat on the bench next to him, his back to the piano and his legs stretching out behind them, and he set his crutches down on the stage floor. Johnny placed his piano books in the book holder on the inside of the upturned lid.

“Do you need me to time you?” Taeyong asked, his voice so close to Johnny’s ear, and he almost felt the other’s warmth from the few inches between them. Johnny’s hands felt sweaty, “it’s been a long time since I’ve done anything piano related,” Taeyong admitted.

“No,” Johnny whispered, “Just… make sure my form is okay?” Johnny said as he lifted the lid of the piano, “I might make a couple mistakes… you’re making me nervous,” the alpha admitted. Taeyong nodded.

“Yeah, I feel the same way,” he murmured, “You’re doing two pieces, right?”

“Three… I’m the opening act, and then I’m performing two pieces with singers.”

“Right, of course,” Taeyong said like he was trying to clear his head, “Then, let’s start with the ones with lyrics. Taeil and Doyoung’s first, then Wendy’s, and then we’ll finish with your solo piece,” he instructed, and Johnny nodded, setting up his music scores. He cracked his knuckles and stretched his fingers and took a soft breath before beginning to play Doyoung and Taeil’s accompaniment.

The sound of the piano and the smell of his teacher right next to him swept Johnny up into another world. A future fantasy he loved to indulge in but the uncertainty made it hurt to think about. He closed his eyes while he played, trying to block it all out, and focus on the music he needed to perform.

The song Doyoung and Taeil were to sing was a very emotional and powerful ballad, and no one but the two of them could perform it. The wrenching, stretching, and showing of their vocal range made Johnny’s skin raise with goosebumps. He’s heard them sing the song over a dozen times so far, and it still happens every time.

He sank deeper into the easy melody, repeating the parts of the chorus by heart. The person next to him was very quiet, but Johnny couldn’t not feel his presence. He continued the piece, trying not to get too nervous and mess up.

“You’re slouching,” Taeyong’s soft voice in his ear reprimanded him, and it made something quite inappropriate shoot through Johnny. He immediately opened his eyes and sat up straighter, “Better,” Taeyong praised, and Johnny didn’t realize he started biting his bottom lip.

After he was finished with Doyoung and Taeil’s piece, Taeyong gave him a soft word of praise, before Johnny moved onto Wendy’s piece. The sophomore girl had a lovely voice and also had incredible range, but she too had chosen another love song that made Johnny’s heart hurt.

Her piece was slower, but the lyrics were happier and hopeful. Johnny’s cruel mind imagined a moment he might one day spend in unguilty happiness with the person next to him. When it wasn’t a sin, a taboo, or a secret just to sit next to each other in the same room for more than a minute.

He continued his second piece, his eyes glued to the keys, when he heard Taeyong’s voice again instructing him.

“Slow down,” he said, and Johnny’s mind went blank for a moment before he pulled himself together and slowed his hands a beat or two, “We’re going to try this one again,” Mr. Lee murmured, his voice low and domestic; Johnny could almost feel the other’s breath against his cheek.

“This is really difficult,” Johnny managed out while still playing, forcing his jittering hands to slow.

“You seem to be doing fine,” Taeyong chimed.

“It’s not the piano,” he answered and looked up into Taeyong’s face for a split second, but that was a mistake. Johnny hadn’t realized how close they truly were. The shadows under the warm spotlights cast a beautiful darkness on Taeyong’s face, and Johnny forgot that the other was older than him for a moment.

He forgot they were student and teacher, he forgot the pain he carried when he looked at him from across the heads in the classroom. Taeyong’s eyelashes were so long; his lips and jaw and nose so perfect to Johnny. Taeyong’s eyes flicked up to meet his, and the tension ignited between them again.

The alpha’s fingers slowed until they were barely pressing the keys of the instrument, the song petering out before it was even finished.

Johnny let out a slow breath through his lips and felt his heart pull him forward. The overwhelming need to touch and be close was beginning to suffocate him. The breath that left Taeyong was thin and uncertain, and at any given moment one of them was going to break and turn away.

The cruelest game they played.

Johnny closed his lips and breathed in through his nose, his eyebrows pinching up, waiting for Taeyong to pull away first. He watched again, like in the forest, as Taeyong swallowed nervously.

“Johnny?” Taeyong whispered, and it ramped up the emotions inside Johnny’s heart and brain. Taeyong’s hand moved to his shoulder, and Johnny’s hand slid from the keys to Taeyong’s leg, still waiting for one for them to break their gazes.

It was going to be Taeyong.

His teacher always knew when it was taken too far and needed to look away.

When Taeyong’s eyes dropped back to his lips once more, Johnny’s brain went blank, and he realized Taeyong was getting closer. Johnny tipped his head down, and they touched foreheads, face to face this time. Johnny wasn’t just imagining Taeyong’s breath across his face, and the two of them didn’t break eye contact. Johnny could hear Taeyong’s heart beating just like his was. When Taeyong shut his eyes but didn’t pull away, Johnny moved forward instinctively.

The dam was broken, almost ten months in the making, and the village was about to flood.

Their noses touched, and Johnny felt Taeyong’s hand curl into a grip on his shoulder as he tilted his head up to meet his. Just before Johnny could push forward those last few centimeters, the door to the auditorium was blasted open.

“Okay! Where is my protégé?” called Miss Kwon’s voice across the grand music hall, and Johnny was forced to rip away. He moved himself to the other edge of the bench, removing all touch. His palm felt the lingering feeling of his teacher’s thigh, and his shoulder and clavicle could still feel the ghost of Taeyong’s hand. When their foreheads disconnected, his teacher’s eyes opened, and Johnny could only stare down at him.

Taeyong’s eyes looked up at him and darkened, his face paling at what had almost transpired, and Johnny swallowed and looked away to still his throbbing heart, which was broken more than ever before.

That was too close.  _ They _ were too close. He was about to kiss Taeyong, and he didn’t know if he could trust himself anymore. His need to flee reared within him, but he stayed, locked in his seat next to his teacher, the only omega he could ever dream of wanting.

“We’re here!” Johnny called, and Taeyong’s gaze broke from him and his shoulders turned out to face the place where Miss Kwon was expected to pop through the curtain. Her heels clacking down the aisle and up the stairs announced her and gave Johnny and Taeyong just enough time to recompose themselves.

She made it onstage and asked how everything was going. When Johnny answered her, she looked to Taeyong and mentioned how he didn’t look well. Taeyong bent down to pick up his crutches.

“My leg is killing me,” he answered, “I forgot to take my pain meds at lunch. Will you help me back to my classroom?” he asked his colleague, and Miss Kwon immediately agreed, concerned.

“ _ Johnny-boy _ ?” she called him by his nickname, and Johnny looked up and back at her, distracted still, “Go back to the choir room and keep an eye on them. Those singers can be rowdy when unchecked,” she ordered, and Johnny grabbed his books from the piano and stood up, closing the lid and following the two of them out, his shame welling deep inside his chest.

On his way back to the music department, Johnny stopped at the bathrooms and locked himself in the first stall. He took a minute to cry alone in the boy’s bathroom, before he cleaned himself up and made his way back to the choir room.

~

The musical showcase was held in the evening time, right after school. A lot of the students were attending, same with parents of the kids in the performances, and rumor had it there were even a few talent scouts for entertainment agencies looking for trainees to take under their wing. Johnny knew his grandma and aunt were there, but his father had neglected to answer him back whether or not he was going to be there that night. Johnny had trouble brushing it to the back of his mind, but when he was backstage with everyone else, it was hard to concentrate with the mixture of all the nervous smells in the room and the buzzing of pre-performance jitters.

All the girls in the choir were in flattering black dresses, none of them with shoulders or too much leg showing, and all the boys were in black suits. The dancers were all in different outfits, and some of them had a few different ones to change into depending on which dance number they were in.

Johnny was waiting in the wings, the sounds of the audience filling up beyond the curtain, and the darkness of the lights that were going to go up when the curtain was drawn.

His heart was pounding due to excitement and nerves.

Johnny was thankful Mr. Lee wasn’t backstage, he was in the audience taking it easy. Miss Kwon was gliding through the students on her high heels, making sure everyone was in their place and knew to wait for their cue. She came up to Johnny and straightened his bowtie.

“You’re going to do great,” she said with a proud smile, “Don’t worry about a thing, just breathe and enjoy your music. You deserve this, kiddo,” she cooed to him, her soft spot for him showing, “Make me proud,” she added, before she picked up a microphone and stepped out in front of the curtain.

The students backstage all quieted as the audience clapped for Miss Kwon’s introduction, and within a minute, the curtain was rising and Johnny’s piano was illuminated with a spotlight. He heard his name get introduced and felt Jaehyun give him a nudge.

Johnny walked out onto the stage and bowed respectfully to each side for the audience, before taking his place at the piano, flipping up the lid, and setting the page of his score to the right number.

Miss Kwon had chosen a complicated piece for him to play, one that most everyone had heard at least once in their lives. Liszt’s Hungarian Rhapsody Number 2. Miss Kwon challenged him to this piece, as it was long, memorable, and takes an extremely talented person to play it.

Johnny loved this one, as far as the classics go. He liked the build, soft and slow, to loud and fast. From daintily strumming the keys to slamming his hands down to create powerful notes. His fingers dancing to a frantic movement across the black and white keys. This piece told a story. It was a rollercoaster, and it was Johnny’s real chance to prove he had the potential to any scouter or school official watching in the audience that night.

He had the whole hall in silence as he performed, and even though he was focused on the music and losing himself to his love of it, he still remembered to sit up as straight as he could.

It was a true showcase of his talent. He loved the drama of this piece and the real boom of it in a silent but filled auditorium. As he finished his final notes, he could feel the sweat on his brow. When he finished, the whole room burst into applause and cheers. He stood up from the piano with a very pleased smile on his face, and he picked up his music book with him, even though he didn’t touch it once during his entire performance.

The audience was on its feet, and Johnny stood beside the piano and gave another deep bow before exiting the stage to make way for the first group of dancers.

His friends and peers all gave him high fives, pats on the back, and words of praise, and when he finally found Miss Kwon, she had tears in the corners of her happy eyes and she pulled him down for a hug.

“That’s my boy,” she said into his ear, making more pride bloom within him.

The rest of the showcase was a blur for Johnny as he worked off the released nerves from his first performance. He went out and played for Wendy, Taeil, and Doyoung, but the piano he played for their songs was child’s play in comparison to what he did for the opening.

Before Johnny realized it, the showcase was over, and they all went out onto the stage, held hands, and bowed in unison, Miss Kwon in the center and Johnny to her right. The crowd was uproarious, and it fueled them all.

When it was over, Johnny and a few others made their way out to find their families. Johnny found his grandma and aunt, and they hugged him, telling him how proud they were of him. His grandmother cooed, a tissue in her hand.

Jaehyun’s mother came up to him and congratulated him, and so did a bunch of other students that Johnny recognized.

An older gentleman in a tweed suit came to him and handed him a pamphlet for an extremely affluent performing arts university. He made sure that Johnny noticed his email address written on the back of it in pen.

Johnny’s body was flooding with confidence and the influx of love and congratulations from the people around him. Even people he didn’t know were going up and complimenting his playing this evening, and Johnny bowed and thanked them all.

Johnny had his eye out for his teacher, his smell, the sound of his crutches; as he made another small sweep through the crowd to search for him, a woman approached him and his small family. She had a polite smile on her face, and in her arms was a large bouquet of yellow roses.

“ _ Excuse me, John Suh _ ?” she asked in English, and Johnny nodded and stepped away from his aunt and up to her. She was Korean, wearing a sleek black dress, with heels and nylons, and a cardigan around her shoulders. She looked youthful but still mature enough to suggest she was anywhere between twenty-five and her early thirties.

“ _ Yes, that’s me _ ,” Johnny answered in English. She smiled wider and held out the bouquet for him, and Johnny nodded his head and accepted it from her.

“ _ You are so talented, and it was a treasure to hear you play this evening. These are for you _ ,” she said to him, “ _ The yellow rose is a symbol of friendship… which is what I was hoping you and I could become _ ,” Johnny looked down at the bouquet and then up at her again, trying to dig through his memory and see if he knew her from somewhere. He didn’t recognize her as a teacher or anyone else he knew for that matter.

“ _ I- I’m sorry… do I know you _ ?” Johnny said sheepishly. She closed her lips, but her smile remained, folding her now empty hands in front of her.

“ _ No, not yet _ ,” she said, “ _ I’m Julia _ ,” she finished, and Johnny’s mind reeled, his eyes going wide, “ _ Your father couldn’t take the time off to come out here and see you, but I decided I should go and show you my support, and meet you face to face.” _

“ _ Y-You’re Julia? My dad’s fiancé _ ?” Johnny gaped and looked her up and down again, and Johnny’s aunt and grandma were suddenly flanking him, sizing up this woman who appeared out of nowhere. She giggled.

“ _ I haven’t accepted his proposal yet _ ,” she said, “ _ In a perfect world, I would like your blessing before I do. I can only imagine how weird it must seem to have a woman not much older than yourself marrying your father. I needed to meet you before we jump into anything like that.” _

Johnny stared at her for a moment, blinking. She couldn’t have been thirty years old, now that he was looking at her more closely.

“ _ I… this is very sudden. I had no idea you were coming _ ,” he sputtered. She rolled her eyes.

“ _ That’s just like your father. I told him to message you and let you know I was coming, and it looks like he didn’t _ ,” she said with a chuckle, “ _ I’d like to take you out for lunch this weekend before I fly back, if you’re comfortable with it _ ,” she continued, “ _ I’d like for you to know me a little before I accept your father’s proposal _ ,” she suggested. Johnny found his words again and nodded.

“ _ Yes, that’s sounds good _ ,” he said, “ _ tomorrow _ ?”

“ _ Tomorrow is perfect, my phone number is in the card inside the bouquet _ ,” she smiled once more before bowing, “ _ it was lovely hearing you play tonight. I look forward to getting to know you better, _ ” she said before she excused herself and disappeared into the crowd. Johnny turned, dumbfounded, back to his aunt and grandma.

“Did that just happen?” Johnny asked, and his aunt nodded.

“She has to be ten years younger than him,” his aunt growled, clearly displeased.

“That doesn’t mean  _ anything _ ,” his grandma quipped, silencing her, “I was  _ eleven _ years younger than my husband, your father, and we had a  _ beautiful _ life together,” she reminded her daughter, “That woman showed great courage coming all the way to this foreign country, alone, to attend a production for the child of the man that she loves. She didn’t have to do that. Now, I may not love my daughter’s ex-husband, but I love my grandson, and he deserves to have a good relationship with his father and whomever he decides to marry,” she snapped, and his aunt shut her lips.

“That  _ was _ very brave of her,” Johnny murmured and looked down at the bright bouquet of yellow roses in his hand, before bringing it up to smell them. Johnny’s grandma stated how she was getting tired, and it was time to call it a night.

As Johnny made his way out of the music hall with his aunt and grandma, he kept looking around for Mr. Lee, but he was nowhere to be seen. Johnny held a small piece of heartbreak over that as he got in the car with his grandmother that night and drove home.

~

Julia wasn’t what he was expecting. Actually, Johnny had no idea what he was expecting out of a woman that his father wanted to marry. The only person he had ever seen his father be affectionate towards was his mother, and that was over a decade ago. He wasn’t even too affectionate with his own son.

Before today, the only thing Johnny knew about Julia was that she was his dad’s secretary, but after his Saturday with her, he learned a lot more.

Julia was an adopted Korean-American. Her parents only spoke English, so she knew very few Korean phrases. Johnny and her met and she had an earpiece in her ear. As soon as she saw him, she took it out and explained it was a translator for helping her use the taxi system in the city.

Johnny brought her around Seoul. They got coffee at one of the numerous cute styled cafés and walked along the river and had traditional Korean food for lunch. She liked seeing the people in mascot suits and the flowers in bloom.

She told Johnny that she wasn’t going to marry his dad unless Johnny approved, and she explained that she too was a child of divorce and that she hated the man her mother remarried to. When she found out that the man she was dating had a child in high school, she was reluctant to accept his proposal because she didn’t want to destroy the relationship Johnny and his father had.

“ _ My relationship with my dad is… not really there _ ?” Johnny said with a sad laugh, “ _ He apologized for it just recently, but we both knew… _ ” he trailed off. She nodded.

“ _ He’s talked to me about it. About… how he regrets not being there for your more, or showing you his feelings more. He’s a very reserved man, but he loves you _ ,” she said.

“ _ I know _ ,” Johnny answered.

The day was emotional and thought provoking. Julia was less than ten years older than Johnny, and she had mentioned that that might be weird for him. Johnny explained that the idea of any woman with his father was weird to him but also that he appreciated Julia’s desire to get to know him.

“ _ If I become a part of your father’s life, I’d like to become a part of yours too, but not as a stepmother. I’ll never be a mother to you, you already have that role filled in your life, and I’d really like to stress that. I want to be your friend first _ ,” she said.

“ _ Oh, the role of my mother-figure is not a fixed role _ ,” Johnny said, “ _ You’ve probably heard a lot of things from my dad about my mom, and I’ll tell you they’re all true. My mother-figure is my aunt, and my grandmother, and sometimes— oddly —my piano teacher _ ,” he said with a laugh, “ _ my real mom is not my mother-figure anymore _ .”

“ _ I’m sorry to hear that _ ,” she said.

“ _ It’s okay _ ,” Johnny assured her, “ _ I don’t need my mother to be my mother figure. I already have that kind of support, and you’re already showing me so much more respect than my real mother ever will… _ ” he said, “ _ When are you and my dad planning on having the wedding _ ?”

“ _ We haven’t talked about it, there are absolutely no plans. I’ve been waiting until I can talk to you about it. I hate the person my mother married, and I don’t want to do that to any other child. I don’t want you to feel like how I did; like I had stolen your father and pushed you out of the way. I don’t want to be your stepmother because I love your father, I want to be your stepmother if you want me to be _ .”

“ _ So… if for some reason, I didn’t give my blessing, you wouldn’t marry my father _ ?” Johnny asked, “ _ And you would be okay with that _ ?” he asked, and she sighed, her shoulders dropping.

“ _ Well, I wouldn’t be okay with that, it would hurt me a lot, but I’d find a way to move past it. I’d probably have to find a new job in a different company, being your father’s secretary would be too painful. It’s already touchy, what with him being my boss. You probably wouldn’t understand that feeling though _ ,” he said, and Johnny blew out a telling breath.

“ _ Actually, I do _ ,” he said, “ _ I’ve liked someone who was in a much higher position than me, and it’s very difficult. What lines am I crossing? How close is too close? What constitutes as inappropriate _ ?”

“Ah,” Julia said, “ _ yes those have been my thoughts exactly _ ,” she added, “ _ You’re a very mature young man, you know _ ?”

“ _ Thank you _ ,” Johnny said, “ _ My grandma and I were very impressed with you yesterday, for coming all the way over here just to show me support _ .”

“ _ Well, I’m a little headstrong. When I get an idea in my head, I make it happen, and when I heard you invited your father to your showcase, I suggested I go in his place when he couldn’t _ ,” she said, “ _ it’s very important to me that you’re okay with this _ .”

“ _ I appreciate that, and I’ll give you my blessing _ ,” Johnny said, and her eyes lit up, “ _ You’ve already shown me that you care about him and me, and you didn’t have to. You didn’t have to make me a priority, but you did, and that really makes me feel happy and accepted, _ ” Johnny articulated slowly, trying to find the right words.

Julia grabbed his hand and squeezed it tightly. She held his hand up to her face and kissed his knuckles in thanks.

“ _ Thank you… so, so much Johnny _ ,” she said, “ _ when the time comes, your father is going to ask you to be his best man. Will you say yes _ ?” she asked. Johnny’s heart welled in his chest at that thought.

“ _ I will _ ,” he answered, “ _ I’d be honored to _ ,” he said.

~

On the last Monday of the school year, Johnny walked into the classroom early and nervous. He was so early that there were very little people in the halls, even the staff parking lot was only partially filled. Johnny put some things away in his locker, making a mental note to start cleaning it out later this week before graduation on Friday, and he shut his locker and made his way back outside to watch for Mr. Lee’s car by the parking lot.

Johnny hadn’t spoken to Mr. Lee much since that day in the auditorium when they were alone and almost kissed, and since then, Taeyong had more than ignored his existence. During the performance night, Taeyong was the only person in Johnny’s life that didn’t come to congratulate him, and it hurt Johnny deeply.

Today, Johnny was going to get an answer to that question.

He waited for Taeyong’s silver car to pull into the lot, and when he finally did, Johnny got up from the stone bench he was sitting on and made his way over. He knew Taeyong saw him from inside the car, and Johnny saw his face fall through the window.

Taeyong opened the door to his car, and Johnny gave him a small ‘good morning,’ which Mr. Lee didn’t return. The student pulled the car door open and gave his teacher room to get out and take his crutches with him. When his feet hit the asphalt and he stood upright, Johnny asked if there was anything he could carry. Taeyong wasn’t looking at his face, his eyes were glued to Johnny’s tie, avoiding his gaze.

“Backseat,” he said softly, and Johnny reached for the handle of the back door. He picked up Taeyong’s teacher’s bag and slung it over his shoulder, then shut the car door. Taeyong locked it and then started off into the school, Johnny trailing him by a half step.

“I didn’t see you at the showcase,” Johnny said.

“No,” Mr. Lee followed up, “I was eager to leave after it ended. It was hard to get out of there with my crutches,” he explained.

“Were you… avoiding me?” Johnny asked quietly, even though there was no one close enough to hear them. Taeyong stopped walking for a moment, his steps faltering before he continued on.

“I don’t want to talk about it here,” he said, and Johnny felt his hands start to sweat.

“Is it because of what… almost happened the other day?”

“I  _ said _ … I don’t want to talk about this right now,” Taeyong answered in his dangerously calm voice, still avoiding looking at him, “We only have to make it through the week, Youngho. Do you think you can manage that?”

“Do  _ you _ ?” Johnny countered, and he saw Taeyong shake his head as the two of them continued walking. They fell into uncomfortable silence as Johnny dutifully followed his teacher to their classroom.

“Shut the door, please,” Taeyong requested in a soft voice, and Johnny did as he was told before taking Mr. Lee’s heavy bookbag off his shoulder and setting it on his teacher’s desk.

Taeyong set the crutches against the whiteboard and sat down in the chair at his desk with a resolved sigh.

“The showcase was wonderful. You played beautifully,” Taeyong said, “And I saw that friend of Miss Kwon’s give you a pamphlet for an arts college. You got what you wanted,” he said but with hardly any emotion, and he still didn’t look past the buttons on Johnny’s blazer.

“There’s something else you’re not telling me,” Johnny said and looked to the door for a moment before taking a step closer and lowering his head and voice to murmur, his hands touching the ends of his teacher’s desk, “Look… I know I made you uncomfortable, and I’m sorry about that day in the auditorium.”

“You didn’t make me uncomfortable,” Taeyong said, “You’re making me uncomfortable  _ now _ ,” he said, and Johnny pulled back, standing up straight again. His eyes were wide, and he felt like he had been struck by a snake.

“What did I do?” Johnny whispered, “If I hurt you, I need to know so I can apologize.”

“It wasn’t you…” Taeyong said, shaking his head. Then he finally looked up at Johnny, looked him in the eyes, and Johnny saw the familiar hurt again, “I sat next to her… at the showcase.”

“Who?” Johnny asked.

“…The lovely omega woman who gave you that bouquet of roses,” Taeyong whispered, “she cried when you played, and I saw how much she adored you… and I saw her give you the flowers, and I couldn’t watch,” his vice cracked, “there’s no reason to wait for me, Youngho. There are plenty of others who would be better for you.”

Johnny stood there dumbstruck for a moment before his emotions took over, and he unloaded his thoughts.

“The woman you sat next to was my  _ father’s fiancé _ ,” Johnny stressed, and Taeyong’s eyes widened, “and that was the first time I’d ever met her. I had no  _ clue _ she was coming,” Johnny said, and Taeyong looked down again and sniffed, “Don’t you  _ dare _ say not to wait for you. You and I both know how hard this has been, and how lonely this feels. I tried to throw myself at someone else to block…  _ this _ out—” Johnny hissed, gesturing between the two of them with his hand, “—it didn’t work for me. I’ve waited for nine months to be able to talk to you freely, and if you think the first woman who comes up to me with a bouquet of flowers in her hands is all that it would take to rip me away from  _ this _ … you’re wrong,” Johnny said, “I’m  _ in _ this, Taeyong. And there’s only five more days left to go,” Johnny said. He felt like he was being harsh, especially when he saw Taeyong’s eyes start to well up, but Johnny couldn’t comfort him right now. He couldn’t even comfort himself right now, “I  _ am _ waiting for you,” Johnny said, “Unless you don’t want me to. Tell me you’re not waiting too, and I’ll go mind my own business.”

Taeyong shut his eyes and took in a breath, but one silent tear rolled down his cheek. They stood there in silence for a moment. Johnny knew that it was cruel to challenge his teacher’s emotions like this, and he also knew very well that Taeyong could make up a lie, tell him he was no longer waiting, and send Johnny away saying something like: ‘Go be a student. Go be with someone your age. This isn’t fair to us.’

“I’m sorry,” Taeyong finally whispered, “I’m overworked and didn’t think things through,” he said and then reached for his bag and unzipped the main pocket. He reached in and pulled out Johnny’s left-behind sweater, just like every Monday, “Admitting anything is so hard and so risky… but I am waiting too, Johnny,” Taeyong sniffed again and held out the jacket for Johnny to take back. Johnny reached for it and tucked it under his arm.

“I’m sorry if I was being harsh,” Johnny added in a low voice, “I was hurt when you didn’t come up to me and tell me how I did. I value your word over everyone else’s,” he admitted.

“You did  _ amazing _ ,” Taeyong said, his sincerity pouring through this time, and Johnny’s tension unwound, “You looked wonderful in your suit. No other performance matched up to yours that night…” he said truthfully, “…another reason why I didn’t walk up to you after the show was because you were with your family, and if you recall, your grandma already knows my face… it would be problematic if she realized I was your teacher after I had been in her house.”

“Oh. Right,” Johnny said, not thinking about that moment at all, the gauzy memory of Taeyong’s visit in his bedroom when he was sick, and the soup he ate that night.

“I overreacted. I got too in my thoughts over it this weekend, I guess,” Taeyong admitted, “I can’t wait for this week to be over, Johnny. I want graduation to arrive just as much as every student in this school.”

“It will,” Johnny said, and he took a step back from the desk as he heard students walk past the door. Both Johnny and Taeyong’s eyes flicked to the door for a second, but when the door stayed closed, they looked back at each other, “I didn’t mean to make you cry, I’m sorry,” Johnny added in a small voice, and Taeyong smiled brokenly up at him and wiped at his eyes.

“It’ll be okay,” Taeyong said, “Only five days left.”

“Yeah,” Johnny murmured, “Only five.”

~

Finals week swept through the school like a tornado. Johnny wasn’t as worried this time as he was during midterms, but he did hold a few lunch-time English lessons in the stairwell his friends normally sat.

Come Thursday, he finished his final math test and turned in his stapled packet with a feeling of completion. He waited for the bell to ring, and when it did, he made his way to the arts wing to go find Miss Kwon, who had emailed him saying she wanted a chat.

She was in her office with the door open, and Johnny knocked on her door and leaned against the doorframe. She turned to him and smiled before standing up.

“My protégé,” she cooed and stood up to give him a greeting hug, “I just wanted to let you know that a few of my friends were watching you last Friday, and they finally got back to me,” she said and turned and picked up a stack of pamphlets for colleges. Johnny took them with big eyes and flipped through them. Three in Korea, one in Japan, and one from Los Angeles as well.

“Wow,” Johnny whispered, his lips tugging into a smile, “All these schools want me?” he asked.

“Yes, they would all be happy to accept you. Your grades are up to snuff, right?” she joked, “Email me when you decide, and I can help you with your application. And I’ll come see your next showcase, anywhere in the world, kiddo,” she said motherly, and Johnny felt pride and gratitude well in his chest. He reached forward and pulled her into another hug, almost tugging her down from her high heels.

“Thank you… for believing in me and helping me along this path,” he said.

“Oh… Johnny-boy,” she cooed and hugged him back tightly, “You’re going to do great,” she added and then pulled away from him, “Now, what are you still doing here? Seniors get out early today. I’ll see you tomorrow at graduation,” she dismissed him, and Johnny nodded.

“I’ll see you there,” he said with a smile and took his pamphlets with him as he walked out of the arts building. Before he left, he peeked inside the choir room and the dance room, and he walked down the hall slowly, knowing it would be the last time he was in that hall as a student.

The reality of graduation suddenly hit him with full force, and Johnny left to go find his friends and commiserate and celebrate the end of high school.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading.  
> Now, who's ready for some smut? Just kidding, ya'll have to wait a week to get your smut. But it's coming ;)  
> Leave me review, I need them to feed my children (read: my dog)  
> Follow me on twitter @NeoCopperTech  
> <3


	12. Graduation with a Bang

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're welcome ;)

Johnny’s absolute impatience over graduation was affecting the people around him. His leg was bouncing and the students around him were giving him looks. He was sure his scent was acting up too.

The commencement song, having to remain seated, the speeches from the teachers, the principal, and the class valedictorian all seemed to sludge on for Johnny. He knew it was a shame, and that he should be more appreciative and savor this moment; he didn’t get it last year as he should have, and now he was graduating, and he couldn’t wait for it to be done.

All the students were in their uniforms, gowns and caps on over them, and in their seats. Johnny saw Taeyong, and Miss Kwon, and a line of all the other teachers on the stage too in their own seats, the bleachers inside the gymnasium were filled with proud parents, including Johnny’s aunt and grandmother, somewhere.

When it came time for the names, Johnny finally felt relieved, because he just wanted to be called, walk up there, get his diploma, shake some hands, and leave high school as a graduate. He wanted desperately not to be Taeyong’s student anymore. He had waited  _ months _ for this, and now he just had to wait half an hour more.

As the names of his friends were called, Johnny clapped for them, and when his row was finally called to stand and get in line, Johnny felt more than ready. Ready to hold his diploma in his hand, ready to take off his school uniform and never put it on again, ready to stand in front of his beloved teacher eye to eye, and man to man.

He shuffled through the line with the others, and finally he was at the front, and the moments waiting for his name felt like eons, but finally he was called. People clapped, he heard some people calling his name, but Johnny felt it all get blocked out. His feet couldn’t feel the ground beneath them as he walked up onto the stage, and to the podium where the principal was. He reached forward deftly and shook his hand, and then a glossy, framed booklet with his diploma was placed in his hand.

The principal motioned for him to look away and Johnny saw someone holding a camera, he held up his diploma and smiled in the direction of the lens. A flash went off, and it left a shadow in his vision as he walked up to the line of teachers who were all going to shake his hand.

Some teachers he had taken, some who’s hands he didn’t really care to shake but did it anyway. Taeyong was standing near the end of the line with one crutch to steady him but he held out his hand and Johnny grabbed it firmly. He looked into Taeyong’s eyes with a smile and saw a flurry of emotions in the seconds that their hands were connected.

Pride, fear, hope, anticipation? Johnny’s hair all over his body stood on end as their hands and gazes connected. Johnny could see so much in his  _ former _ teacher’s eyes. He held his breath as they let go and then moved onto the next. As soon as he was off the stage, he followed the student in front of him back to their seats, back to their row, and they sat down again, each one with an official diploma in their hands.

Even though Johnny agonized for it to be over while it was happening, once it was truly over, and all the students stood and cheered and threw their hats in the air… it seemed so fleeting.

It was done. High school was over.

Johnny regrouped with Jaehyun, Ten, Sicheng, Yuta, and Doyoung, and they were joined by their families, who had all made it out for their graduation, and Johnny had one arm around his grandma, and the other around Jaehyun. He felt light and happy. Excited and borderline jittery.

He caught Lee Taeyong’s eye again from across the way, as he hopped along on his crutches with Miss Kwon by his side, getting ready to leave.

When Jaehyun mentioned his graduation party that night, a party that had been months in the making, Johnny’s heart felt torn. He knew he was going to go to this party and hang out with his friends, he knew he was going to get drunk and dance and stay up so very late, but all he really wanted was to take Taeyong to a quiet place, alone.

Jaehyun insisted the seniors all take a picture together, and Johnny knelt down in front with Sicheng— them being the tallest— and the boys took a smiling picture together. When Johnny looked at the photo after, he wanted it to be sent to him immediately, because this was how he wanted to remember this day.

Happy and accomplished, surrounded by his friends and family.

Now that graduation had come and gone, a new chapter had the potential to begin.

~

Jaehyun’s parents had allowed Jaehyun the party of the year for graduation. It was a great way to end an era and kick off the summer. After the graduation ceremony, and many tears and congratulations, everyone parted ways and went home to get ready for the evening.

Johnny took off his school uniform and hung it on its hanger, giving it a fond look before he put it on the hook on his wall, preparing to ask his grandma to help him clean it and put it away for sentimental purposes tomorrow. He left it on the hanger in his room and went to take a long shower.

Alone and naked in the shower was where his thoughts drifted towards Taeyong often. Johnny felt much less guilty this time when he came all over his chest, the water washing it all down. There was nothing to feel nasty about now. He decided he needed to put his feelings on the shelf one more night though, and get a better attitude for the party. His impatience with the unknown between him and Taeyong had to wait.

Party business was important business.

He finished his shower, and chose his outfit for the evening. He decided something simple, to match the weather. Light wash jeans rolled at the cuff and a simple fitting white shirt, French-tucked, with clean, white high tops to match. His chocolate brown hair was voluminous and shining from being freshly washed and treated with product. He was smiling at himself in the mirror as he preened himself a little and he added a small amount of eyeliner to his look, giving him smoldering eyes.

The party was going to start at six, and Johnny had the time to go to the corner store and grab some snacks before getting on the bus to Jaehyun’s. He sent his friend a text asking him what he wanted, and Jaehyun answered: ‘ _ booze _ ’ in a text, with no punctuation. His grandma had reminded him twice that it was rude to show up to a party empty handed, and Johnny bought two bags of chips, and a large bottle of fruity rum.

Johnny felt a little guilty getting alcohol for nineteen-year-olds, but that was the legal age to drink in Korea. He tried not to feel giddy over being allowed to purchase alcohol, and not having to be twenty-one to do it.

Johnny was the first person to arrive, and Jaehyun was following his mother and father around the house, asking them if they were ready, and okay with this, and making sure he had everything on their checklist figured out. Johnny watched with interest as his friend’s mother, wearing a nice knee length dress, slipped on a pair of heeled shoes in the entryway.

“We’re going to be back around midnight,” his father said, “Johnny, make sure things don’t get too wild,” he said fondly and Johnny smiled.

“Absolutely Mr. Jung,” he said sweetly and Jaehyun and Johnny stood by the front door and watched the married couple leave the house, “I cannot believe they just left,” Johnny said, impressed, “How did you convince them to let you throw this party,  _ and  _ get them to not be present for it?”

“I groveled. I begged. I did yard work every Sunday morning for the last two months,” Jaehyun admitted and held out his knuckles to Johnny, and the older boy and him knocked fists.

“ _ Worth it _ ,” Johnny said and Jaehyun quoted him back with a grin.

“ _ Worth it _ !” he laughed and then took Johnny into the kitchen to start setting up the drinks station.

Three hours into the party, and things were finally swinging. Ten had taken the liberty of creating a playlist and had it pumping in the backroom, where most of the party-goers were gathered to dance and have a great time. Jaehyun was being a great host, checking on everyone, making sure none of the underaged kids drank too much, and if they did, he was prepared to call taxis to get them home safely.

Johnny was sitting on a couch off to the side, watching the others dance in front of him. Sitting a couple feet away from him was a couple who were making out, one in the other’s lap. Johnny sipped at his rum and soda mixture, playing around on his phone which was about to die, and feeling distracted but still trying to make himself want to party.

Jaehyun walked up to him with a smile and a bottle of unopened red wine.

“I don’t know who brought this, but you should take it,” Jaehyun said, “And you should also get out of here.”

“What do you mean?” Johnny asked, confused.

“You  _ know  _ what I mean,” Jaehyun said with a concerned look and a smile, “thanks for coming to my party, but you and I both know there’s someplace else you’d rather be,” he said and he pushed the cold bottle into Johnny’s hand, “ _ Get out of my house, John. Go get him _ ,” he said in English, even though the couple next to them had no idea there was even a party going on around them, and probably didn’t hear him anyway.

Johnny stood up, the bottle in his hand, and his heart started to pound at the idea. He knew there was someplace else he would rather be too, and if he denied this opening, he might not get another one tonight.

“Jaehyun, you are literally the best,” Johnny said and he pulled his friend into a hug.

“I know,” Jaehyun said with a dimpled smile, “now get out of here. And tell me all about it tomorrow,” his friend said. Johnny walked into the kitchen with his new bottle of wine, his mind spinning, knowing the bit of alcohol he had consumed was affecting his judgment. He stood in the kitchen where it was quietest and called for a taxi. His phone was at five percent, but he was still able to order a cab over the phone and give them his billing info to charge his account.

Johnny didn’t know whether or not he should say goodbye to Mark, Lucas, Ten, or anybody else, and he decided he didn’t. Jaehyun would let them know he was leaving, and he didn’t want to be guilted into staying when his heart was already decided. Johnny went outside to wait. It was dark out now, and the sounds from inside the house were muffled, and Johnny realized the moment he shut the front door that he was so happy to be leaving the party.

He kept checking his phone, which he knew was stupid because it was draining his battery life. When his taxi pulled up, Johnny leapt down the steps and slipped into the backseat. He gave the man Taeyong’s address, and buckled in. The second they pulled away from the curb, Johnny’s heart started to pound as the realization of what he was doing rushed through him.

He took out his cell phone again and scrolled through it to find Taeyong’s email, his personal one, but as he was typing out a message, his phone died.

His nerves got the better of him and he ended up chatting with the cab driver for a while to find some ease.

“Where are you headed?” the man asked after a while, “On your way home?”

“No,” Johnny answered, “I’m on my way to… confess my love, I guess,” he said, “there’s a person… I’ve liked him for months, but now that the school year is over, I can finally pursue him.”

“Well hey!” the man said cheerily, “I wish you good luck, young man,” he said and Johnny beamed. As they pulled off the highway and into Taeyong’s neighborhood, Johnny felt this knee bouncing again. All the houses on his street were identical, white homes with slanted grey roofs, garages, and little planters by the door. He hadn’t been here since Christmas, but Johnny still remembered the address, and when he saw there was a light on inside from the living room window, Johnny’s heart started hammering again.

“This is it,” Johnny said and he slipped his dead cell phone into his pocket and remembered to take his bottle of wine with him. As he got out of the taxi, he could feel that he was still buzzing a little from the alcohol, and it was making him nervous. The cab driver pulled away and Johnny gripped the bottle as he walked to the front door. He swallowed and knocked.

The moment he knocked, he realized he didn’t know what he was going to say. He didn’t know what he was doing. Maybe he shouldn’t have come? What if this wasn’t going to be alright? He didn’t have time to run, and his feet froze to the floor as the door opened and the smell of his favorite person flooded over him.

~

Taeyong’s breath caught in his throat as he saw Johnny standing at his door in normal, everyday clothing, and his scent washed up into his nose. The young alpha had a bottle of wine in his hands and his light brown eyes were wide, just like his were, and Taeyong’s toes started to tingle.

“You’re here,” Taeyong breathed, surprised.

“Yeah… sorry,” Johnny started awkwardly, “My- my phone died, I was trying to email you…” he offered. Taeyong sucked in a ready breath and his heart started pounding.

“It’s okay. Come in,” he breathed out, and stepped back inside to allow Johnny into his home. The moment Johnny brushed past him into the foyer, the fresh scent of alpha swept deeper through him. He felt his knees weaken, and he leaned more into the crutch he had under his left arm.

Johnny toed off his shoes and then looked down at him. Taeyong was wearing an oversized black sleep-shirt that went down to his mid thighs, and no shoes. Johnny swallowed as he wondered if there were shorts on under that shirt. He still had his leg brace on, and was getting around with one crutch instead of both. Johnny had never seen Taeyong in anything so unglamorous, including that time on Christmas eve in his sweats, but Johnny still thought he looked wonderful. Their eyes connected, unencumbered, and Johnny felt the conditioned need to look away. Taeyong did it first and he looked down at the wine bottle.

“Oh— this is for you,” Johnny said and held out the bottle, “I don’t know if you drink red though…” he added awkwardly. The tension between them was so palpable, thick, and obvious. Taeyong deftly took the bottle with his free hand and looked back up at Johnny’s face.

He used to hate admitting to himself that John Seo was handsome. He had that classic alpha look: tall, strong jaw, broad shoulders, but there was more than just that. His lips were plush and thick, his eyes were soft and gentle, his scent was enough to relax Taeyong completely but he never let it show when others were around.

The light was off in the foyer, the glow from the illuminated living room casted them in a shadow, and Johnny was reminded again of that fateful moment in the library. His hands, now empty, felt like they needed to be doing something more.

Their eyes were locked for long heartbeats. Moments like these used to feel selfish and indulgent, and now that their period of waiting was over, it was harder to shake the feeling of guilty pleasure at simply being able to maintain eye contact. Taeyong’s body leaned forward and he let go of the crutch, letting it fall and clatter against the cupboards behind him and Johnny’s fingers twitched.

“Mr. Lee?” the alpha asked, still conditioned to the title, and Taeyong shook his head as he took one step forward, breaking nine months of withholding.

“Don’t call me that,” Taeyong whispered and their bodies gave way to the magnetic attraction between them.

One moment, both his hands were uncomfortably empty, and the next Johnny had filled them with Taeyong. With his left hand now free from the crutch, Taeyong reached up and took Johnny’s neck in his warm hand and brought Johnny down to his height. Johnny took the smaller male by the waste and shoulders and sewed their bodies together, pulling the omega into him completely.

The moment their lips touched, their senses and instincts took over. Their kiss was covetous; the hungry sparks that flurried between them as their lips met made the last nine months of waiting worth it. Tasting the other for the very first time felt like completion. Taeyong’s lips were so soft, and Taeyong would say the same about Johnny’s.

Taeyong pushed forward just as fervently as Johnny pulled them together, and the alpha leaned back against the shelves of the foyer as he felt the wine bottle get pressed to his side, taking all of Taeyong’s weight into his arms.

The alpha needed more, and he reached down to pick Taeyong up from the floor. With one arm completely circling around the smaller’s waist he held their bodies close, and the other hand wasted no time in hoisting Taeyong’s bad leg up and off the ground, holding him securely by the back of the thigh.

Taeyong gasped as he was lifted from the floor, their faces level now, and he wrapped both arms around Johnny’s shoulders in this new position as he angled his head to kiss the other better. The neck of the wine bottle gripped in his right hand, and the other tangling into the silk of Johnny’s hair, Taeyong opened his mouth more and let Johnny in. Their tongues reached out to taste one another, their desperation for more sensation overwhelming.

With all of Taeyong in his arms, Johnny walked out of the foyer slowly, making sure his lover’s head wouldn’t hit the edge of the entryway door as he took them deeper inside the house. Taeyong smiled into the kiss, feeling weightless in Johnny’s embrace, whole for the very first time, and laughing softly as he let Johnny take him wherever he wanted him. Johnny let go of his waist to grab both toned thighs before he fell back onto the couch, with Taeyong over him.

Pain shot through the omega’s leg as they landed in the straddling position on the couch, and he broke their connection to yelp. Johnny heard the sharp noise and opened his eyes to look into Taeyong’s face.

“Your leg?” he gasped.

“ _ Yes _ ,” Taeyong hissed, and Johnny immediately flipped them, putting Taeyong on his back on the couch and Johnny sank to the floor in front of him, on his knees, his hands on the older’s creamy thighs

“Sorry! Sorry…” Johnny gasped; his breath ragged. Taeyong’s hands stayed on his shoulders and he slowly scooted to the edge of the couch, his legs on either side of Johnny and his need for more touch outweighed the pain in his leg that would soon pass.

As Taeyong came closer, Johnny raised his body up onto his knees, his hands circling Taeyong’s tiny waist again, never wanting to let him go. Taeyong let the wine bottle out of his hand, and it rolled into the dip of the couch cushions, and let both his hands feel Johnny completely.

The alpha’s broad shoulders felt sturdy in his hands and he carded his fingers up his neck and into his hair again, tilting Johnny’s head back for another kiss. Taeyong’s lips felt right on his, more perfect than any other person Johnny’s ever kissed. Their scents swirled together and Johnny could taste and feel Taeyong’s arousal, his scent getting headier and telling with each passing second.

Johnny couldn’t feel enough of him, no matter how much ground his hands could cover. His twitching fingers delved under Taeyong’s shirt to feel his heated skin and his spine tingled at how soft and smooth his back and sides felt. Taeyong let out a small, erogenous mewl into Johnny’s mouth and it just drove Johnny to pull him closer. Taeyong’s spread legs were on either side of Johnny’s hips and he pulled the smaller male flush against his torso. His hands traveled back down again, and over the shorts Taeyong did have on under the shirt; with one arm still holding Taeyong close, his other raked down his thigh and then back up again. Hands and lips and breaths, the two of them were in sync, and Johnny could feel his own arousal start to rise.

He needed to pull away before he took things too far, and he broke the connection of their lips, pressing his forehead against Taeyong’s. The older man instinctively pushed forward to chase those lips back into a kiss, huffing a little at the loss. He tried to pull Johnny impossibly closer by the shoulders and back, his nails digging into Johnny’s shirt.

“Why’d you stop?” Taeyong breathed against his face and Johnny felt himself swallow, trying to keep himself in check.

“I don’t want to move too fast,” Johnny gasped and nudged his nose against Taeyong’s intimately, “you have to tell me to stop.”

“I’m not going to,” Taeyong said and shook his head against Johnny’s, their noses brushing. The alpha felt his jaw clench and his hands gripped Taeyong’s hips for purchase and patience.

“You  _ have  _ to,” Johnny murmured, not opening his eyes. He had been holding back for so long that now that he’d gotten a taste, it was only a domino effect before they ended up naked together, “This is going so fast. If you want to take things slow, I need to know where the lines are,” Taeyong’s hands released his shirt and took his face gently, and Johnny finally opened his eyes to look at him. Their eyes met and Johnny felt shameful pleasure at doing this, even though he knew he could. He had spent months feeling this way, and the residual guilt was still so fresh.

“Listen to me,” Taeyong said, his pupils blown wide and his breath thin, “there are no more lines. We’ve spent the last nine months taking it slow,” Taeyong swallowed thickly, his lips parting again and Johnny’s eyes fixated on them, wanting more than just another kiss, “Now, I want you to take what you want,” he said, giving Johnny all his permission, “I want it too.”

Johnny didn’t need to hear another word, he pulled Taeyong back into him again and took both his thighs back into his hands. Taeyong’s arms wrapped around his shoulders and Johnny lifted him back up from the couch.

“Bedroom?” Johnny asked weakly, giving in. Taeyong pointed with his arm to the hallway and Johnny followed the path. He looked up at Taeyong, admiring how he looked when he was above Johnny and he walked them slowly down the hall. The alpha could smell Taeyong’s growing arousal as they continued to the bedroom at the end of the hall.

Johnny nudged the door open with his foot and Taeyong flicked the light switch on as they entered; the smell of pure Taeyong invaded Johnny and he felt his vision tunnel as he entered such a sacred place. Johnny saw the bed, off the floor in a simple wooden frame, and he deposited Taeyong on it.

As Taeyong let go of his shoulders and fell back onto the bed, his hands above his head, Johnny bit his lip.

He had imagined such positions before, towering over Taeyong, his teacher laying debauched just like this before him on a bed. The difference now was that this was real, and he was no longer Taeyong’s student. The details were better too, the way Taeyong’s black hair was mused from being kissed and fell back out of his face, his lips were pink and ripe for more, the sleep shirt he was wearing had risen up, showing his cute navel and the peeks of his hip bones; the shorts needed to go, but all would happen soon enough.

Johnny’s fingers moved to take off his tee-shirt, taking in his surroundings as he did. Taeyong’s bedroom had a closet with large mirrored doors, and an open entryway into a master bathroom. His bedsheets were a posh silver grey, and he had dark curtains on his window. The smells were the most striking to Johnny though. Clean laundry, dirty clothes, cologne, deodorant, the bedsheets and... unadulterated Taeyong. The scents made this moment all the more real.

As Johnny pulled off his shirt and tossed it to the floor, he watched Taeyong bite his bottom lip, his face awash with his want, and Johnny felt twice as confident as the omega’s eyes traveled down his form.

“I’m going to make sure you get the best sleep  _ ever  _ tonight,” Johnny promised as he lowered himself to the bed, crawling up over Taeyong, who’s eyebrows furrowed upward at the statement.

“Please?” he asked in a purely wanton voice and Johnny’s arousal skyrocketed. Taeyong’s hands met his shoulders again and they kissed once more. Johnny would have been so content to spend the evening kissing those lips, but when he was given permission for more, he wasn’t going to turn that down.

He kissed Taeyong like it was the last time he might ever get to. Their lips would part in tandem and Johnny felt Taeyong’s tongue peek out to lick softly against his lips. Johnny used one hand to hold Taeyong’s neck and push himself forward more. Every touch they could have was never enough.

Johnny pushed Taeyong’s legs apart and slotted his knee into the gap created there. Just that little movement made Taeyong whimper under him and it drove Johnny forward, pressing himself against Taeyong fully. Their bodies fit together like matching puzzle pieces, and the heat from Taeyong’s body seeped into his form. Johnny could feel the stiffness of Taeyong’s cock through the shorts, and the idea of turning him on made Johnny’s blood start to flow too.

Taeyong crooned at the feeling of being ground into and he gripped Johnny’s back, digging his fingernails into the alpha’s skin and flexing upward as much as he could, trying to get more of that feeling. With their lips parted, Johnny spared no time and nudged Taeyong’s head aside with his own and began kissing his neck. Taeyong’s unique scent was strongest there and Johnny’s brain wasn’t prepared for the powerful effect it had on his senses. He steadied himself with one hand the other moved up into Taeyong’s soft hair. The older man had a full body reaction at the sensation of having his neck kissed and he let out a quiet moan and moved his head aside to bear all that he could to Johnny’s lips, his thoughts failing.

Taeyong’s fingers traveled from his shoulders, down his back and finally hooked into the waistband of his jeans, trying to tug them off. Johnny growled unintentionally into Taeyong’s ear and the omega whined softly. Johnny placed another kiss on Taeyong’s jaw right before he ripped himself from Taeyong’s arms. He knelt up over him on the bed and undid his belt. Taeyong sat up on his bent elbows to get a better view, and his eyes zeroed in on Johnny’s hands as he undid his buckle and fly. Johnny watched Taeyong’s pupils dilate before his eyes and he sucked his bottom lip into his mouth, the carnal want between them pulsing.

Before Johnny took off his pants completely, he reached up to curl his fingers into Taeyong’s loose dolphin shorts, Taeyong’s length pushing up against the material creating a slight tent. Before he pulled them down, he looked back up into Taeyong’s eyes, saying nothing, but speaking volumes with his gaze and intentions. Taeyong nodded his consent and used his good leg to push his hips up, allowing Johnny to slowly peel his clothing off his hips, taking Taeyong’s underwear with him. As Johnny dragged down his shorts, his eyes were locked to the space between his thighs. Taeyong’s length was small, but so hard and the moment it was freed, it bounced up and laid against Taeyong’s stomach, but that wasn’t all that attracted his gaze. As Johnny pulled down the shorts, a strand of thin, clear fluid was clinging to his underwear and it broke from the material and stuck to the older man’s thigh. Johnny licked his lips at the sight and he couldn’t wait to get closer and immerse himself in the scent of Taeyong’s slick. Being mindful of his bad leg, Johnny lifted the heel of Taeyong’s left leg and carefully pulled the shorts off and over the splint, tossing them to the floor.

“Does this need to stay on?” Johnny asked, tapping the heel of the brace.

“Unfortunately, yes,” he answered, breathless.

“We’ll make it work,” Johnny said with a reassuring smile as he crawled up between Taeyong’s legs, taking both of his thighs into his strong hands and hoisted Taeyong up, pushing him further up the bed so his head could be on the pillows.

Taeyong yipped at being handled like he weighed nothing and Johnny saw the beginnings of a blush forming on his cheeks. Johnny saw Taeyong’s little cock twitch and then smear a little precum onto the shirt he was still wearing.

“Fuck, I have wanted to do this for so long,” Johnny moaned as he took both his hands and pushed Taeyong’s knees up, and back towards his head, the dancer folding easily. Taeyong whimpered and Johnny looked down at all the places he would soon explore with vigor. Taeyong’s cute little cock and his absolutely hairless pink hole, shining with clear, fragrant slick. Johnny moved in close and drew in a breath through his nose and his mind short circuited at how  _ fucking  _ good he smelled. His own cock throbbed inside his jeans.

He smelled like sweet cream, and a spring wind through a wheat field fresh in bloom; Taeyong keened at the way he was being treated.

“Please, please, please, please….” he gasped out and Johnny stopped holding back. He closed his mouth on Taeyong’s opening and he felt the smaller male lock up under him. Johnny was addicted from the first taste, and he closed his eyes as he opened his mouth and licked all he could.

Taeyong started twitching and whining under him, his hands gripping at Johnny’s forearms and mumbling incoherent words among the gasping breaths. Taeyong’s mind wasn’t keeping up very well at the idea of Johnny eating him out, but his imagination had wandered there shamefully before. It was different when it wasn’t just in his mind.

Johnny was in heaven. It had been so long since he had been intimate with anyone like this and Taeyong tasted the best than any other person he had ever engaged with. He licked long strokes from his hole to his sack, adding pressure to his perineum and enjoying the feedback he was getting from Taeyong. His puckered entrance was a never-ending supply of the sweet and musky taste, and every time Johnny’s tongue passed over it, a little more would dribble out.

He dove in deeper, pushing his tongue past the ring of muscles which opened for him almost immediately. He opened his eyes and found Taeyong’s looking up at him, his lips near red from all the biting, and his eyes glazed over, and watering just slightly.

Taeyong’s fingers left his wrists and then tangled into his hair, and Johnny was expecting him to pull his face deeper between his splayed cheeks, but instead Taeyong was weakly pushing him away.

“Johnny…” his voice was whiny and thick, and Johnny pulled away, his saliva mixing with the texture of the omega slick and creating another string between his lips and Taeyong’s still dripping hole,  “Stop it--” his tone begging, “--I want you,” he murmured and his fingers fell again to Johnny’s knees, scratching at the denim, trying in vain to pull them off.

Johnny licked his lips clean and swallowed the flavor of him, before letting down both of his legs gently. Taeyong’s back uncurled and Johnny saw his cock had oozed all over his shirt. Johnny wiped his mouth on the back of his hand as he took in the sight of Taeyong, a soon-to-be wreck on the bed leaking and squirming. He didn’t want to break their contact, but had to, to take off his pants. He rolled off Taeyong and lay on his back next to him. Their eyes stayed locked as Johnny shucked off his pants quickly and Taeyong’s hand stayed on his shoulder, and ran through his hair again.

When Johnny was completely naked, he rolled onto his side and took the bottom of Taeyong’s soiled shirt, pulling it up to take it off. Taeyong raised his arms and let Johnny do it for him and soon the two of them were without barriers in the bed together. His eyes caught the silver necklace around Taeyong’s neck and it made his heart swell with romantic longing.

Johnny put one arm around Taeyong’s back, and the other crept under the omega’s neck to cradle his head, bringing him in for another kiss.

Their lips met again, hungry at first but then softly, as Johnny dragged his fingertips up and down Taeyong’s spine slowing their groove significantly. Taeyong’s free hand ran the length of Johnny’s flank, then up his stomach to his chest; as their kisses slowed, so did Taeyong’s hand, following Johnny’s lead. The alpha felt the anticipation building in his stomach as Taeyong’s fingers swept slowly down his torso, towards a whole new target.

Johnny gasped softly into Taeyong’s lips, and closed his eyes as Taeyong’s gentle fingers wrapped around his length. Johnny flexed his body unintentionally and gripped Taeyong’s hair and waist. Taeyong pulled away just slightly and gasped too.

“O-oh…” he murmured, his eyes going wide, “Oh, you’re  _ big _ ,” he whimpered and Johnny couldn’t help but smirk conceitedly.

“I’m just…  _ proportionate _ …” Johnny faltered and his eyelashes fluttered as Taeyong’s hand dipped down, and then rose up his length for the very first time.

“I  _ dreamt  _ you would be,” Taeyong admitted in a small voice and Johnny pulled him in closer by the waist, their torsos almost touching, their hips almost connected and Johnny’s hand skated down to Taeyong’s right leg, which he pulled over his hip. At every movement, Taeyong would gasp, whimper, or cry and it gave Johnny life to know he was this vocal and responsive.

“What  _ else  _ have you dreamt about?” Johnny asked in a hushed voice and Taeyong’s lips twitched into an embarrassed smile, his fingers dragging over the rim of Johnny’s cockhead pleasurably.

“I’m going to tell you about all of my fantasies, eventually,” he promised and the hair on Johnny’s arms and the back of his neck stood on end at the idea of Taeyong having fantasies about him.  _ Plural _ .

That notion made Johnny pull him flush against him. Taeyong’s hand got trapped between them, but Johnny pulled it from between them, and he reached for his own length and pushed it down, positioning it between Taeyong’s spread legs, but letting it lay against his heated and wet flesh.

Taeyong quieted, his breath becoming thin and he grabbed Johnny’s forearms instead. With Johnny’s cock so close to Taeyong’s opening, everything became much more charged. Johnny raised one hand up to Taeyong’s chin, pushing his mouth back up so they could kiss again, and Taeyong whined deeply at the situation.

He ground forward into Johnny, who put his hand back on the omega’s thigh that was hooked over his hip and pulled him impossibly closer, making sure he could feel Taeyong’s stiff cock between them. Johnny’s length, thick and heavy between Taeyong’s open legs was like a big tease. The more Taeyong rocked against Johnny, the more the alpha’s cock slid through the slick that was continuing to soak his thighs.

Johnny had no idea how he was holding onto his composure like this, but he needed to take this slow. He needed to relish this moment like it was a dream he never wanted to wake up from.

They had thrown themselves into this so quickly, and Johnny had no idea what the future would be like between them, or if there even was a future at all. Taeyong could wear his gifts, and Johnny could carry him down a mountain, but they spent so much time trying not be too close that now Johnny was second guessing himself.

What if this was the only time? What if Johnny would never get this again, and he’d have to live a life of heartbreak never knowing what it would have been like to be with this person completely? Not just physically, but  _ be  _ with Taeyong. Be the one he wants to see every day, be the one he wants to lay with at night, be the one he’d like to end up with.

“What’s wrong?” Taeyong asked, and Johnny realized his eyes were shut and he was losing himself in the spiraling thoughts.

“I… I’m overthinking things,” he admitted, “I don’t want to take things too fast… in case this never happens again,” his voice almost broke, “I need to savor this.”

“Who said it wouldn’t happen again?” Taeyong asked, and wound one arm around Johnny’s back, holding him.

“Nobody, I’m just...” Johnny couldn’t get the words out right and he pressed forward again and kissed Taeyong lightly on the lips, “Are you going to send me away after this? I need to know if this is real, or if I’m going to go home tomorrow with a shattered heart.”

“ _ Johnny _ ,” Taeyong murmured fondly and he reached his head up and gently kissed the alpha between the brows, where his tension made them pinch together, “I’m not going to ask you to leave.”

“Really?” Johnny asked. Taeyong nodded and bent back down to kiss his cheek, suddenly finding a new need to kiss the young alpha everywhere.

“Really, and if it were up to me,” Taeyong whispered, “I’d have you stay here all summer. I can’t make you stay in Korea forever, you have family elsewhere, and college to eventually go to but… I want you to stay,” he said and pecked Johnny on the tip of his nose, “and I want to see where this goes, now that we’re not bound by the high school. Okay?” he asked, needing confirmation. It was small moments like these that reminded Taeyong that Johnny was still a young twenty-year-old, and that he was indeed older than the alpha, even if just by five years. Johnny felt comforted by that answer, and he felt a tightness leave his shoulders.

“Okay,” and then kissed Taeyong’s lips again. Johnny felt Taeyong unravel in his embrace, and the smaller male gasped and let out the quietest moans when Johnny’s mouth trailed back down his neck.

Johnny moved his arm out from under Taeyong’s head and wound them completely around the smaller man’s form. Taeyong took the opportunity to move his arms as well and he arched his back, pressing their bare chests together as he linked his arms around Johnny’s shoulders and head.

Eyes closed, and bodies tangling, they shared sweet, languid kisses in the light of the bedroom. Every few moments, one of them would crack their eyes open to see if it was really the other kissing him right then, or if this was a dream that would end bittersweetly.

Johnny rolled over Taeyong, putting the omega on his back and Taeyong’s fingers wound into his hair as Johnny started kissing down his collarbones and chest. Johnny’s arms moved to either side of Taeyong’s form to push himself off of the bed. Taeyong watched Johnny crawl lower, down his body, and he jerked and whimpered when the young alpha kissed his stomach and hip and looked up at him with a lusted gaze. Johnny rose up from the bed, his hands smoothing over Taeyong’s sensitive thighs and a new, anxious thought struck through Taeyong’s head.

“Johnny?” he whispered, and the younger male looked up to meet his eyes again curiously, his hands still gliding up his hips and down his thighs lightly.

“Hmm?” Johnny inquired softly; his lips curved into a content smile.

“This isn’t your… first time, is it?” Taeyong asked, not sure what answer he wanted. On one hand, being Johnny’s first would be magical, but he knew that Johnny was a handsome and popular student, and could only assume it was the same at his other schools. Taeyong watched Johnny’s eyes change, and his hands stopped, before he shook his head.

“No,” he answered truthfully, “I’ve been with others... before I moved to Korea,” he explained.

“Ah,” Taeyong said, not sure if his heart liked that answer or not, but he continued, “good. I don’t want to set the bar for you.”

“Believe me, I think you’re about to bring the bar  _ way  _ up,” Johnny said with a charming smile, “I can only assume this isn’t your first time either?” he asked.

“Correct,” Taeyong said and brought his hand up to brush his hair back. There was a moment’s pause as Johnny’s eyes swept down Taeyong’s splayed body again, drinking in this sight.

“...We can wait,” Johnny reminded him in a small voice. Taeyong sat up on his elbows at that statement, and shook his head.

“I don’t want to wait,” Taeyong said, sensing Johnny’s insecurities rising again, “I  _ want  _ you,” he added, and Johnny’s fingers started moving across the outside of his legs again, “Do you want to wait?” Taeyong asked. Johnny bent Taeyong’s good leg up placed a kiss on his knee, his eyes shutting and his eyebrows furrowing together. Taeyong watched Johnny’s shoulders rise as the alpha pulled in a breath through his nose. When Johnny exhaled and removed his lips from Taeyong’s skin again, he shook his head.

“No, I really don't,” he answered, and Johnny stopped kneeling to settle between Taeyong’s legs and the older man felt his anticipation and want triple with the reality of Johnny between his open thighs, “Do you want me to wear a condom?”

“No,” Taeyong answered and bent up both of his legs, setting the heel of his splint on the bed and opening himself fully to Johnny, who couldn’t help but look down and bite his lip at the sight, “No barriers, not even latex,” Taeyong hushed, his eyes hazing at the idea, “I want us both to feel  _ everything _ ,” he swallowed.

“ _ Fuck _ ,” Johnny cursed in English, his hormonal sex brain taking over now that they were on the same page. Johnny’s hard on, which had deflated a little during their heavy conversation, was about to be back at attention. Johnny took Taeyong’s bad leg, and hooked his elbow under the bend in his knee, holding Taeyong’s leg up and open. At the movement, Taeyong fell back onto the bed again with a content but impatient moan. Johnny’s gaze left Taeyong’s hips to look back into his eyes again, his left hand trailing down, “You’re going to tell me if I’m hurting you,” he stated, and his palm came down to smooth over the back of Taeyong’s thigh, ready to dip into the utter wetness Taeyong had dripping from him. Taeyong didn’t speak, he merely nodded in agreement, and Johnny watched Taeyong’s face as he slipped two fingers through the delightful slick, rubbing across Taeyong’s hole.

The omega’s eyes slipped closed and his mouth opened in a silent moan. His thighs tensed up and he breathed out hotly as Johnny did it again, dragging his middle and index through the natural lubrication Taeyong created.

“Don’t you  _ dare _ tease me,” Taeyong moaned, but it came out like a feeble, pleading whimper. Johnny felt his lip twitch into an enamored smile as he dipped his two fingers deeper, letting them sink into Taeyong completely.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Johnny murmured as he watched Taeyong’s eyes roll back when his fingers entered him. His hole offered little to no resistance and Johnny pushed in all the way to his knuckles in one motion, slowly pressing forward and then dragging them back out. He did this a few more times, watching the omega’s face blossom with pleasure when Johnny touched him just right. Taeyong’s chest rose and fell with his breaths, his hands clenching the bedspread beneath them, his back threatening to arch up off the bed.

Johnny didn’t know how much of this he could stand, but he still wanted to savor the look on Taeyong’s face. The older male opened his eyes finally, his eyebrows drawn up, a blush covering his chest, neck, and face.

“Stop,” he whined, “I can’t take this anymore,” he started to shake his head with aroused delirium, “Johnny,  _ please _ ,” he whimpered, and the tone in Taeyong’s voice made Johnny see gold. He could watch Taeyong take pleasure all night, hear his moans and little begs, but in the back of his mind, Johnny knew it wouldn’t be enough for him either. He withdrew his hand and wiped it on the bedspread before he tipped Taeyong’s legs back again and lined their bodies up.

Johnny looked into Taeyong’s eyes, both of them with lower lips tucked between clenched teeth, and he waited a heartbeat before Johnny used his hand to guide the head of his cock to Taeyong’s entrance. He rubbed the head of his dick up and down through the slick a few times before he slowly pushed forward, breaching the rim of Taeyong’s core.

Taeyong’s eyes fluttered at the feeling of Johnny’s thick cockhead, and Johnny leaned forward, slowly sliding in and placing his hands on the bed at either side of Taeyong’s ribs. As Johnny pushed forward, he gasped at how tight Taeyong felt and how warm and inviting his body was.

Johnny couldn’t help the feeling, and he slowly, agonizingly pushed, centimeter by centimeter. As Johnny continued to slowly fill Taeyong, the omega’s breaths got wispier, and his fingernails again dug into Johnny’s shoulders

When Johnny bottomed out, their hips meeting and their bodies connected, Johnny was again level with Taeyong’s face. The alpha felt the person under him start to shake, his mouth dropped open and his eyes squeezed shut. They breathed together, face to face, chest to chest, and hips to hips. Taeyong let out a late moan, and Johnny felt Taeyong’s left leg shudder under his hand. Before he started to move, Johnny leaned his head down to Taeyong’s shoulder, kissing his clavicle and breathing evenly to keep himself steady. He had to wait for Taeyong.

For what felt like hours to Johnny, he forced himself to stay still even though all he wanted was to rock his hips and see the pleasure on Taeyong’s face. He chose a spot at the base of Taeyong’s neck and softly sucked the skin into his mouth, Taeyong’s head again falling to the side to let him do as he pleased. Taeyong’s body was reacting to his every touch exactly the way Johnny hoped. After a minute Taeyong stopped shivering, his right leg fell open even more, and his fingernails stopped digging so hard into Johnny’s shoulders.

When the omega let out a breathy moan and slightly tilted his hip up to Johnny’s, the alpha pulled away from Taeyong’s neck and looked him in the eyes. Oh, how beautiful Taeyong looked up close like this. His long eyelashes curling over his dark brown eyes that were glassing with emotion and lust, his soft pink blush that stained his cheeks and nose, his hair pushed back completely by Johnny’s hand. The alpha slowly retracted his hips and Taeyong’s hands traced up to link around his neck.

Taeyong let out a soft nod and swallowed thickly, and Johnny took his cue.

Nothing felt better than the meeting of their two bodies after months of neglect. Taeyong may have been limited by the splint, but that didn’t stop Johnny from making sure he was comfortable and enjoying himself.

He had heard Taeyong’s voice almost every day for a whole school year, but it was as if he was hearing it for the first time as the omega moaned unabashedly and cursed when Johnny did something particularly right; hearing his name tumbling from Taeyong’s lips in the throes of sex was better than anything his imagination could conjure.

Johnny’s mind was so in tune with self-control and withholding after all the practice he had with Taeyong that he managed to easily and slowly make sweet love to the man under him. His pace was steady and he enjoyed every movement of pulling out and sliding back inside like it was the very first time he had ever experienced the sensation. Whenever he grazed Taeyong’s prostate, his little moans would go higher, and it mesmerized Johnny.

While Johnny loved the unbothered pace, Taeyong was clearly getting antsy and wanted more. Watching and feeling his new lover flex his stomach and hips to meet Johnny’s lazy thrusts was enthralling. Taeyong’s eyes would close in rapture, and then open them again to meet his gaze. His mouth would open and his pink tongue would push to the edge of his lips as he let out erotic moans and cries. His whimpers were getting desperate and Johnny felt his fingers start to dig into the nape of his neck again and Taeyong looked at him with pleading eyes.

“Johnny… turn me around?” he whined and Johnny shook his head and leaned forward to kiss Taeyong on the mouth again while the older man cried with mock frustration into his lips.

“ _ No _ …” Johnny husked out, his voice becoming gravely with his breaths, “I need to see your face when I make you cum for the first time,” he explained and Taeyong’s whole body had a reaction to that, every part of him flexing and his blush brightening, “then I’ll turn you over and take you from behind.”

At that statement, Taeyong pulled Johnny’s head back down into a desperate lip lock again and Johnny felt one of Taeyong’s hands separate from his neck and sneak between them. Johnny broke the kiss to look down to see Taeyong’s hand wrapped around his own cock, and Johnny chuckled lightly and sat back. He rose above Taeyong again, sitting up in the bed as the omega remained laying back and Johnny batted his hand away, making Taeyong whine again in question.

Johnny had a new kind of lopsided smile on his face as he wrapped his own fingers around Taeyong’s cock, and the smaller man gasped and clenched the bedspread with his free hands at the feeling.

“When _ I _ make  _ you _ cum,” Johnny repeated and Taeyong bit his bottom lip again at the statement. With just a few pumps of Johnny’s hand, Taeyong threw his head back against the pillows, his body bowing to get Johnny deeper in him and to get his hand to move faster.

The absolutely erotic scene of Taeyong splayed out and wound tight with pleasure before him made Johnny’s own dick throb from its new home inside of Taeyong and Johnny knew his knot was going to start forming.

With his right hand still holding Taeyong’s hurt leg off the bed, he let his left hand start stroking Taeyong’s cock languidly, and watched with smutty glee as Taeyong got louder with his cries, moans, and demands.

“Fuck! Please!” the older whined, his hands clawing into the blanket underneath them, “Johnny  _ faster _ ,” he nearly begged and Johnny obliged, rocking his hips to a new tempo. The bed was starting to sway with them and Taeyong’s eyes were clamped shut as he let Johnny take him to new heights. Johnny could feel Taeyong’s pleasure rising. He could feel how much wetter Taeyong was becoming; the precum from Taeyong’s stiff cock made the glide of his hand so much easier.

The louder Taeyong got, the faster Johnny went; Pretty soon, Johnny felt a bead of sweat run down his temple and he realized he was knocking the bedframe into the wall repeatedly.

Right before Taeyong came, his eyes opened up to meet Johnny’s again and his breath became suspended in his throat. Johnny felt Taeyong’s walls grip around his cock; his thighs tensed up, and then the smaller man’s eyes fell closed again and he arched off the bed with a loud, long, carnal groan of gratification. Johnny fucked Taeyong through it, enraptured by the pure art that was Taeyong as his pleasure crashed around him, shuddering and thrashing, and thin streams of warm cum painted across his chest and all over Johnny’s fingers.

By the time Taeyong’s orgasm had washed through him, Johnny’s knot was fully formed, resting against the outside of Taeyong’s rim. Johnny let go of Taeyong’s softening cock and brought his hand to his face to lick the salty cum from his fingers while it was still warm. The omega had one eye open as he watched Johnny lick his hand clean and Taeyong brought his right knee up, and his hand to his face to cover his embarrassment.

Johnny stayed still for a few moments, watching the mess of the omega before him come down.

“Do you still want me from behind?” Johnny asked finally. Without moving his arms away from his face, Taeyong’s chest expanded in a long breath and he nodded. The alpha slowly pulled out, his erection throbbing at the lack of touch but he willed himself to remove his body from Taeyong’s temporarily, even though separation was the last thing he wanted.

Taeyong let out a soft moan when he pulled out completely, and Johnny let Taeyong’s legs relax as he rolled Taeyong softly onto his right side. Johnny settled down onto the bed behind him, his hard and still wet dick prodding his ass and Johnny ran his hand down Taeyong’s side and kissed the back of his neck, making the omega hum in appreciation.

“Ready?” Johnny whispered, and Taeyong nodded once more. Johnny picked up Taeyong’s left leg again and guided his cock back to Taeyong’s drenched hole, the feeling just as delicious as the first time. As he slid back inside Taeyong’s heat again, the smaller man gasped.

Johnny had an idea, and once Taeyong and him were fully aligned once more, Johnny slipped his arm under Taeyong’s side, and taking his thigh, rolled Taeyong on top of him, putting himself on his back on the bed and Taeyong’s back flush against his chest.

Taeyong yipped as Johnny hauled him on top, into just the position he wanted him in, and Johnny bent his legs up for support and leverage. He ran his hands down Taeyong’s chest to his hips, and grinded up into him. Taeyong keened at the feeling, and his hands went up over his head and into Johnny’s hair. His head fell over Johnny’s shoulder, his gasping mouth right next to the alpha’s ear.

“This good?” Johnny asked again, his voice nearing a growl as he realized he liked this position a lot. Taeyong swallowed and nodded, and Johnny turned his head just slightly so he could lick Taeyong’s neck, making the omega flinch and whimper in a way that made Johnny start to lose his mind.

“Yeah…” Taeyong whispered.

“Tell me if your leg hurts,” Johnny reminded him again, before he surged his pelvis up and forced Taeyong’s hips down.

In this position, it was short but deep thrusts, and Johnny could feel the muscles of Taeyong’s ass gripping him in every right way. He liked that he could run his hands up Taeyong’s chest to caress his neck, or even lightly flick and rub at his nipples, which made Taeyong’s whimpers purely wanton and shameless.

The sweat that clung between them and the mingling of both of their scents was turning Johnny on so much and he ground Taeyong down on his knot, but restrained himself from pushing forward too much. He knew he’d reach climax without knotting; this wasn’t a problem for him, but after a few minutes, it clearly became a problem for Taeyong.

“Johnny…” his sinful moan right in the alpha’s ear, “I want your knot…” he almost cried.

Hearing that made Johnny’s alpha-sex brain see white and he had to halt his movements entirely to not push himself completely into Taeyong. Johnny let out a low groan and tried to find a reason why he shouldn’t.

“No,” he forced himself to say, Taeyong’s hips moving independently from him and making his resolve shaky, “I don’t want hurt you,” he said and Taeyong sucked in an erogenous breath and said something Johnny never thought he’d ever hear come from Taeyong’s pretty mouth.

“But I like the pain…” his voice whimpered in his ears and Johnny’s cock throbbed again. He gripped Taeyong’s hip bones for support, and breathed deeply, trying to maintain himself. Taeyong’s hands left Johnny’s hair and gripped the bars of the headboard above them, and used the leverage to push himself back onto Johnny’s knot, swiveling his hips a little and wetting Johnny further. Johnny pulled them both back, but then couldn’t stop himself from grinding back up just as Taeyong pushed himself down with conviction. Taeyong sucked in a breath and Johnny clenched his jaw as he felt his thick knot get enveloped inside Taeyong’s body.

For a moment, the world went blank. Johnny had kept up incredible composure up to this very point, but now that he was locked, knotted deep inside his lover for the first time, he nearly lost it.

Taeyong and him moaned at the same time and Johnny’s arms locked around his stomach and torso. He planted his feet firmer on the bed and started thrusting up into Taeyong, who cried in appreciation, his head lolling over Johnny’s shoulder.

It was ten times more intense like this, thousands of years of evolution between an alpha and an omega boiling down to this moment, and Johnny started to growl low in his throat with every sharp thrust. He never wanted to leave the heat of this moment, and wished it could last a lifetime.

Johnny could hear Taeyong’s breaths getting thinner once more and he felt the telltale signs of his lover’s nearing orgasm. Johnny kept up his pace, one hand holding Taeyong’s hips steady while the other toyed with Taeyong’s nipple, loving the way he reacted, flinched, and whined so cutely.

“A-alpha…” Taeyong’s voice dripped and Johnny could only grip Taeyong harder at the title, his hands abandoning Taeyong’s torso in favor of holding his hips so he could pound into the smaller man on top of him even harder. Taeyong’s noises and choked cries made Johnny see red.

“Please— more!  _ Ah _ ! Yes!” and filthy curses spewing out of his lips and right into Johnny’s ear. Taeyong’s breaths become erratic and he could no longer hold onto the headboard; his arms flew down and he gripped the bedsheets on either side of them.

Johnny felt Taeyong’s back arch off of him once more as Taeyong came a second time, his guttural moan rattling Johnny’s soul. The slapping of their thighs and hips was music to Johnny’s ears as he took his own pleasure in the omega’s on top of him.

The alpha could barely manage to slow down after Taeyong’s orgasm ebbed away, and he rolled them once more, putting Taeyong on his stomach and smearing his cum all over the blankets with absolutely no care. Johnny used his thighs to spread Taeyong’s, his right leg straight on the bed, and his left leg bent up, the splint in the air. Johnny raised himself up and looked down at the glory of Taeyong’s shoulder blades, spine, and the swell of his ass that Johnny was still buried in. Taeyong’s hair was a sweaty wreck and he was sure his was too. The omega turned his head to the side and Johnny bent close to breath into Taeyong’s ear.

“Are you alright?” he managed to ask; his hips unable to stay completely still but his soft, short presses into Taeyong were better than the pounding of a minute before.

“Uh-huh,” Taeyong said with a weak nod and Johnny kissed his cheek, his muscles quivering.

“Do you need me to stop?” he asked. Sincerely hoping he didn’t have to, but he would if Taeyong asked it of him. Taeyong’s one visible eye opened and looked at him, his mouth open and his breaths harsh from trying to catch up.

“No…” Taeyong murmured, shaking his head a little, “…want you to cum,” he groaned out and Johnny kissed his face again, happy to hear it.

He started slow once more, being mindful of Taeyong’s leg. He rolled his hips, his knot still firmly stuck inside of Taeyong, and his thrusts were slow as he began to build his rhythm once more. Taeyong’s eyes slipped closed again, and his hands gripped the bedsheets near his head.

When Johnny saw his hands, he slid one hand up to intertwine their fingers and Taeyong let out a contented sigh; when Johnny slid his other hand up to Taeyong’s, the older man opened his fingers to let Johnny’s slide between them as well.

This position made Johnny’s brain quiet and he lowered himself completely to feel the length of Taeyong’s body against his. With their hands weaved together, and nothing more on the horizon except for Johnny’s climax, the younger male picked up his pace once more.

Taeyong’s hands gripped his and Johnny felt the omega spread his legs just an increment more and felt his hips pop up to meet Johnny’s thrusts.

His movements became erratic. Taeyong’s body was tight and warm, his muscles gripping Johnny’s shaft and knot fully, instinct kicking in to offer himself up to the alpha on top of him.

Johnny’s hips start slamming into Taeyong, who was letting out weak moans and grunts. Johnny felt powerful, and fulfilled, and an overwhelming mix of love and sexuality as he drove into Taeyong at increasing speed and force. He had dreamed of this many, many times, but this was more incredible than his imagination.

After a minute, Taeyong started babbling incoherently again and it ramped Johnny up even more. His ears heard the words coming out of Taeyong’s lips, but his mind heard something different.

He couldn’t differentiate if Taeyong was saying “ _ Cum in me, cum in me, cum in me _ ,” or “ _ Claim me, claim me, claim me _ ,” and his alpha brain lost it. He felt himself swelling even more and he knew he was on the verge.

It had taken nine months, but in just one night Johnny and Taeyong had come together completely.

His instincts shut his rational brain down, and his body enjoyed and relished the feeling of Taeyong’s velvety sex. Johnny dropped his head down to Taeyong’s neck and sucked in a breath. Taeyong’s scent and his— together— just like on the copious amounts of clothing the two had passed secretly between them magnified in Johnny’s senses and he couldn’t take it anymore. He opened his mouth and open-mouth kissed Taeyong on the back of the shoulder, and fulfilled his request.

Right as Johnny’s orgasm broke, he opened his mouth wide and sank his bare teeth into Taeyong’s exposed shoulder.

Taeyong’s body responded by locking up, every muscle clenching at the precise moment, and Johnny let out a long, snarling groan into Taeyong’s shoulder just as the omega  _ screamed _ into the mattress.

His orgasm was intense, and his feet scrabbled at the bed to push himself impossibly deeper into the omega under him as he felt spurt after spurt of hot cum empty out of him and into Taeyong. When his strength finally petered out, Johnny released Taeyong’s shoulder from his mouth and his hands loosened up on their grip.

He rolled them once more, taking Taeyong’s hips with him as he rolled off the omega and onto his right side. He was unable to separate their bodies right then, he had to wait for his knot to shrink before he could, and he heard Taeyong breathing harshly.

They both needed to catch their breaths, and Johnny pushed his right arm under Taeyong’s neck, curling his arm under his head like a pillow.

Taeyong weakly reached for Johnny’s left arm and pulled the alpha back to spoon him fully, even though they were both hot and sweaty, being apart was not a thing on either of their minds. Johnny opened his eyes and saw the bright red mark on Taeyong’s shoulder and softly licked it with his tongue, trying to soothe the bite.

“I’m sorry… I bit you,” Johnny breathed as he kissed the raised marks. Taeyong shook his head and curled his right arm around Johnny’s left, holding the alpha just as close.

“Don’t apologize…” he huffed out, “…it was perfect,” he sighed. Johnny smiled against his spine exhausted from their activities, and he couldn’t even imagine how Taeyong felt after all that.

“I’ll turn the light off in a little while,” Johnny whispered his promise and Taeyong let out a long, happy sigh once more.

“Okay…” he murmured back, “remind me tomorrow… to wash this blanket,” he said and Johnny found the strength to chuckle a little bit at those words.

“I will,” he said and kissed the back of Taeyong’s neck. Taeyong brought Johnny’s hand up to his mouth and kissed his knuckles and Johnny let his head drop to the bed, waiting for his cock to deflate so he could turn off the light.

After a minute or so, Taeyong’s leg shifted and his hands fell loose, and Johnny felt his heart beating with love as he listened to Taeyong’s breaths slow as sleep found him.

It took about ten minutes, but Johnny was able to pull himself out of Taeyong after a while, and then get up to do some modest clean up. He walked on stiff and wobbling legs to Taeyong’s master bathroom and grabbed the first hand towel he could find. He wet it just a little, and returned to the bed to clean up what he could between Taeyong’s legs, before he wiped his own cock clean and tossed the soiled terry cloth into the sink to deal with tomorrow. He walked around the side of the bed to the bedroom door and flicked off the light, plunging the room into darkness and making Johnny exhaustion hit him all over again.

He went back to the bed, following the scent of his new lover, and he knelt down once more and laid himself down on top of the bedsheets. He spooned himself up against Taeyong’s back and reveled happily at being able to wrap his arms freely around Taeyong’s body, close his eyes, and fall into the most comfortable sleep he’s had in almost a year.

~

Sometime in the night, Johnny awoke to the feeling of Taeyong slinking out of his arm. Johnny didn’t move, but he did open his eyes and watch Taeyong’s form in the darkness as he got up from the bed and slowly hobbled around the corner to the bathroom. The sound of the light switch, followed by the harsh yellow light that streamed into the bedroom made Johnny shut his eyes again, but he could still see the orangish glow from behind his eyelids.

He listened to Taeyong use the restroom, and wash his hands; as his lover was away, Johnny took the liberty of pulling down the bed sheets and actually getting under the covers, pulling the sheets open for Taeyong to get in them when he returned. Johnny lay there in the clean sheets and pulled in the smell of Taeyong and his fabric softener from the pillow cases. When the lights were turned back off, Johnny sat up in the bed to wait. He couldn’t see Taeyong, but he heard the omega man come closer to the bed, his heavy plastic covered leg thumping on the carpeted floor.

Johnny felt Taeyong’s weight return to the bed and he reached his hands out wordlessly to touch him. Taeyong let out a soft breath, surprised he woke Johnny up. The alpha sat up taller and took Taeyong’s slender waist into his arms, pulling Taeyong to him, and feeling the smaller’s arm wrap lightly around his shoulders.

Johnny tilted his head up and kissed Taeyong, their lips touching as soft as butterfly wings; the sweetest and most tender kiss they’ve shared tonight.

Johnny helped guide him into the bed and held the covers open more so Taeyong could slip inside with him.

In near silence, Johnny pulled the covers up over them, and then wrapped his arms around Taeyong once more, ready to go back to sleep, and Taeyong snuggled back against him and sighed with contentment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was it worth it? I think it was worth it.  
> In the words of my dear friend Dia (Cleonheart): Go yell at me on twitter   
> @NeoCopperTech


	13. The End

The light from the window above the bed gently woke Johnny from his sleep. He considered this moment to be the best part of the day already, because without even having the time to register it, he was curling himself just a little closer to Taeyong.

He nosed his way into Taeyong’s hair and smelled his soft and natural scent, and his arm curled around his tiny waist just a little more. They had fallen asleep while spooning, but now Taeyong was on his back, and Johnny gently moved closer, slipping his leg over Taeyong’s quietly, being mindful of the brace he still had on and not to move so much that he would rouse the man sleeping next to him.

Johnny spent a few good, long minutes memorizing his face. His lips looked even more kissable than before when they were parted with sleep, and Johnny noticed a small scar next to his left eye that he hadn’t noticed before, too focused on looking into his eyes last night rather than what was around them.

He turned his head to see about a clock, but then he realized that the time of day shouldn’t matter. He wasn’t going to leave this bed until Taeyong woke up, and after months of fitful sleep, the omega he laid with needed every minute of undisturbed rest he could get. Johnny shut his eyes again and couldn’t help but smile to himself at how full his life felt today.

He must have dozed off in that comfortable, warm bed because the next time he opened his eyes, Taeyong was stretching under him, his arms going over his head and his chest and stomach pushing up to stretch his back. When he relaxed, he wound his arm around Johnny’s head and neck, the other hand coming down to rest on Johnny’s arm over the blanket.

Johnny opened his eyes and saw Taeyong’s, half lidded, and a lazy smile on his face.

“Good morning,” Taeyong whispered in a gravelly voice, maybe a little hoarse from all the noise he made yesterday, and Johnny didn’t answer him back. He pushed forward to kiss him on the lips, making a little vow to himself to do this often to make up for lost time. When they parted again, Johnny let out a long, content sigh and laid his head down onto Taeyong’s arm.

“You told me to remind you to wash these sheets today,” he whispered, closing his eyes again, and Taeyong chuckled through his nose.

“Ah. Yes. I suppose that has to happen sometime today,” he said, and Johnny felt a hand in his hair, lightly running through the ruffled mess, “Yesterday was… amazing,” Taeyong murmured, and Johnny felt his smile brim wider.

“I thought so too,” Johnny agreed.

“I can’t believe I came  _ three _ times,” Taeyong said with a satisfied smile, “I’ve never cum three times in one go before last night.”

“Hell.  _ Yes _ ,” Johnny stressed and put one fist in the air, “Already setting new records,” he chuckled, and Taeyong laughed with him, before lightly pushing Johnny over onto his back and turning his body to slip his good leg between the younger’s and curl closer, resting his head on Johnny’s chest. The alpha wrapped one arm around Taeyong and the other went behind his head to relax again. Johnny felt Taeyong’s fingers lightly trace his collarbone and shoulder.

“If we’re not careful, we’ll fall asleep again,” Johnny whispered, and Taeyong let out a sleepy moan.

“Doesn’t that sound like a perfect first-day-of-Summer activity though?” the older asked, and Johnny snickered.

“ _ Activity _ might be a stretch,” he said and leaned down to kiss the crown of Taeyong’s head, “but also, breakfast?” Johnny suggested, and Taeyong hummed in agreeance.

“There was this one time…” Taeyong started, and Johnny shut his eyes as he listened to his voice soften the more he spoke, “I went on a date with this person… well, actually, it wasn’t a date, we met each other quite by accident in a _jewelry_ _shop_ ,” he said, and Johnny’s face split into a full blown grin as he recalled the memory, “we went shopping at a used bookstore and the farmers market, and we got kabobs for lunch… anyway, this person told me that he could make a _killer_ omelette,” Taeyong said with a cheeky smile and turned his head to look up at Johnny.

“Who did you go on this date with? Kabobs and used books? I’m  _ jealous _ ,” Johnny joked and turned his head down to meet Taeyong’s lips in another kiss, making Taeyong giggle lightly.

“I want you to make me breakfast,” he said with a whisper and bright eyes, another side of Lee Taeyong shining through now that they had no boundaries between them, “I’m hurt. Make us omelettes.”

“Oh, really?” Johnny mocked, laughing, “Well, if you want something, you have to say ‘please’,” Johnny countered, and Taeyong grinned at him.

“ _ Please _ make breakfast, Johnny?” he asked, his voice almost sugary with how thick he was laying it on, but damn did Johnny love the way Taeyong said his name in that cutesy voice.

“Well, of  _ course _ ,” Johnny cooed and reached forward again for another kiss, “anything for you,” he added cheesily, but Taeyong grinned into their kiss regardless. They laid together for a few minutes more, before Taeyong rolled slowly off Johnny and reached for his cellphone on the bedside table.

“Oh god. We slept  _ ten _ hours,” he laughed.

“If I sleep over more, you’ll be out of sleep debt before you know it,” Johnny said, and he sat up only to reach down with one hand and kiss Taeyong on the lips once more. Taeyong’s hand came up to touch the side of Johnny’s face as well, and they kissed slow for a good while, Johnny loving how unrushed this morning felt already. They parted, and Taeyong mentioned how he was ready to spend the whole day in his pajamas, and Johnny turned to look over the side of his bed where their clothes from last night were left on the floor, probably wrinkled already.

“Ah,” he said to himself, “I only have my jeans.”

“I have sweats you can wear,” Taeyong said, his hand running over the bed to touch Johnny’s arm, and the alpha turned back to him, “I’m the king of comfort, and I have tons of sweats in extra-large.”

“Do you?” Johnny asked. Taeyong nodded, gesturing to the closet doors.

“My closet is pretty big. The pajamas and sweats are on the back wall in the drawers. Everything on the right is my work clothes,” he said with a small yawn, “Will you grab me a pair of pajama pants as well, please? Something big I can fit over this stupid cast,” Taeyong asked, and Johnny nodded, getting up off the bed with stiff legs, showing Taeyong his fully nude backside as he went to the closet.

He wasn’t expecting it to be a walk-in closet, and he flicked on the light switch by the door. He was impressed with its organization and how much clothes were in the room; a room almost as big as Johnny’s bedroom back at home. There was even a small vanity by the back corner that had a little bench and tons of accessories hanging from the little mirror above it.

“ _ Oh, my god _ ,” he said with appreciation and out loud as he disappeared inside the closet.

“I  _ know _ ,” Taeyong commented from the bedroom, “I love my clothes,” he said, “Think, Johnny. Have you ever seen me wear the same outfit twice?” he asked, and Johnny’s eyebrows shot up as he realized he hadn’t. One of the things that really had pulled him to Taeyong since the beginning was how smart he had always dressed.

“Wow. Your closet is so sexy,” he said as he ran his fingers along the rack of clothes, seeing the lovely gradient of colors they were organized in and moving to the back wall which had drawers and cubbies. Johnny opened the drawers and saw perfectly folded sweatpants, pajama bottoms, and underwear; the smell of Taeyong was strong in this room, and Johnny kind of never wanted to leave. He pulled out a pair of pajamas and let them unfold in his hands, excited that he could actually fit into the pants.

“Thank you, I’m very proud of my collection,” Taeyong said from the door, and Johnny looked up to see Taeyong standing in the closet doorway, the white sheets wrapped around his otherwise naked body, and surveying his closet, “I do wear everything too. Except for the stuff over here,” Taeyong said, gesturing with a finger to the left side of the closet, “A lot of old clubbing clothes from my college days, and all my Halloween costumes.”

“I can see your cop costume,” Johnny said, plucking the navy-blue outfit by the sleeve as he handed Taeyong a pair of clean underwear and extra loose pajama pants he could fit over his splint, “Wait, did you say ‘clubbing days’?” he double-took. Taeyong grinned.

“You wanna go through it all? There’s some wild stuff in there, and I’m not really all that hungry yet,” he said as he made his way slowly over to the vanity bench with his sheet to take a seat and put on his house clothes.

“How fun,” Johnny mused as he pulled the pajama pants up his bare legs and untied the tight drawstring, probably tied that way so Taeyong could fit in them. He started at one end of the rack and started pawing through the hangers, one by one. The end of the rack was all Halloween costumes and he found nurses scrubs, a black and red cape, a frilly French maid outfit, the cop’s uniform— “Oh, by the way, those  _ handcuffs _ ?” Johnny mentioned and looked back at Taeyong, “One of these days I want to use those,” he added.

“Ah yes, a consolation gift from a terrible ex that I claimed in the break up,” Taeyong said with a grin, as he slowly pulled the pajama pants over the plastic of the leg splint, “They’re real cuffs, you know. They’re practically police-grade.”

“The fact that you had to use a key to get them off was all the proof I needed,” Johnny said as he moved the cop uniform down the rack to continue his perusal, “I went home that afternoon and had to masturbate in the shower over how worked up that got me,” he admitted, and Taeyong chuckled.

“Glad to know I’m not the only one,” he said, and Johnny shot him a look and earned a similar one in return. As he continued to look through Taeyong’s exciting side of the closet, he learned a lot about his new lover.

“I never knew a man could own so much  _ leather _ ,” he mused, enjoying the revealing tight leather skinny pants with lace up the side.

“I was wild in college,” Taeyong added, “I’m not as young as I used to be,” Taeyong said with a stretch, and Johnny glanced over at him again.

“You’re  _ still _ young,” he said, and Taeyong smiled appreciatively at him. The more Johnny flipped through the rack of clothes, the more he learned about the typically clean-cut Taeyong he had known for the last year. He pulled out a pair of obscene black leather booty shorts and looked at Taeyong as he pulled it from the rack.

“Oh, I love those shorts,” Taeyong commented with a fond smile, “You’re getting to the good stuff now,” he said. Johnny placed the shorts back on the rack and continued on. He found a black and white school blazer and pulled it out.

“ _ Awwww _ , you kept your high school uniform!” Johnny cooed, and Taeyong laughed loudly.

“Oh,  _ no _ . I went to the same high school you went to, Johnny. You’re missing the other half of that,” he said, and Johnny looked back on the rack and his mind boggled as he took out the shortest black school-girl skirt he had  _ ever _ seen. It was pleated and had a white band around the hem, matching the white trim of the blazer. There was even a white shirt and necktie hanging on the inside of the blazer too, to completely the outfit. He stood there holding the uniform with his jaw unhinged, and his eyes roved the outfit again and again. Taeyong merely grinned, loving the shock and confusion on Johnny’s face.

“Oh my god… I think my brain is breaking,” he said after a couple late seconds, “How…? Why?  _ What _ ?” Johnny stumbled over his words.

“I like it,” Taeyong said simply, “but I haven’t gotten a chance to wear it for anybody yet,” he said simply, like he was talking about a pair of jeans he bought months ago that still had the tags and the intentions on them, “There’s a pair of shoes that I bought to go with the outfit, and I haven’t worn those yet, either,” Taeyong said and pointed from his spot at the vanity to a shelf above Johnny head, where he saw bags, backpacks, a large storage box, and a shoe box with a  _ very _ recognizable label on it.

Johnny put the school uniform back on the rack and then reached for the tan box above his head labeled with white cursive. He couldn’t even believe his eyes when he opened the box and saw the gorgeous pair of stiletto black pumps with glossy red bottoms.

“Are these  _ real _ ?” Johnny asked, breathless, and Taeyong nodded.

“I bought them as a gift to myself after that last nasty break up. They cost me quite a lot, but I think they were worth it, even if I’ve never worn them for anyone but myself before,” he said. Johnny deftly took the box over to Taeyong and knelt on the floor at his feet. Taeyong bit his bottom lip, suppressing a big smile as Johnny picked up his right foot by the ankle and pushed his pajama pants up past his knee. Then he picked up the expensive shoe from the box and slowly, toe first, fit Taeyong’s foot into the shoe.

Like a Cinderella fit, the Louboutin heel slipped on perfectly, and Johnny stayed there on the floor of the closet for a moment and admired how it looked on him. Taeyong flexed his calf and turned his ankle around for him.

“Pretty, right?” he asked, and Johnny lifted Taeyong’s leg higher and kissed his ankle gently, looking up into Taeyong’s eyes with a smoldering gaze as he kissed higher and higher.

“When your leg is all healed,” he whispered against Taeyong’s skin, “I want you to wear the whole outfit for me,” he finished, and Taeyong’s tongue poked out to lick his lips.

“I’d really,  _ really _ like that,” he said and took Johnny’s face in his hands and brought the alpha up to kiss him again. Johnny could smell the slight arousal coming off of the omega again, and he pulled away with a permanent grin as he gently took the shoe off of Taeyong’s foot and put it away in its box and back on the top shelf. He walked back to Taeyong and held out both his hands to help him to his feet.

“How about those omelettes?” he asked, “And I’ll help you strip the bed and start the laundry.”

Taeyong smiled and took both of Johnny’s warm hands and allowed the younger to pull him to his feet.

~

When Johnny finally had the chance to be doting towards Taeyong, he took every little opportunity. He carried Taeyong like a bride to the laundry room and sat him on top of the washing machine while he started the wash for the blanket they soiled last night; the sheets would go in after. Then Johnny carried Taeyong again to the kitchen where he sat him up on the counter while Johnny took the liberty of familiarizing himself with Taeyong’s kitchen.

“I imagined this that last time I was here, you know,” Johnny said as he stirred around the sizzling veggie stir fry in a pan, cooking what will be the filling of their omelettes first before he cracked any eggs, “One day having the honor of spending a lazy day in our pajamas together, cooking and eating food, watching movies, getting chores done,” he mused as Taeyong sat back against the counter leisurely and watched him, his head tilted dreamily to one side.

“I imagined this a few times too, except I’d be standing and helping you,” he said and lightly thumped his splint into the cabinets below him.

“Don’t worry about it, you’ll be up on your feet soon enough, and I’ll just have to make you as comfortable as possible in the meantime,” Johnny said as he turned the first pan down to low and went to grab the carton of eggs from the refrigerator, “Actually, you could help me by cracking and beating eight of these,” Johnny said as he set the carton next to Taeyong and searched for a small mixing bowl. Taeyong pointed with his hand, and Johnny followed it to a cabinet and immediately saw the black mixing bowls he had gotten the older for Christmas. Johnny had a special kind of smile on his face as he chose the small one and handed it to Taeyong.

“Smells really good,” Taeyong commented as he set aside the perfectly beaten eggs.

“Thank you,” he chirped, “I’m a breakfast champion,” he said with a laugh as he left his prepped omelette skillet on the stove and went up to Taeyong to take the eggs, giving him a kiss on the lips before he left. Taeyong’s eyes closed every time they kissed, and it made Johnny’s heart flutter as he pulled away and saw his eyes were still closed, relishing the moment.

The pan sizzled as Johnny dropped in the liquid eggs and started the process of lightly stirring and mixing, without disrupting the omelette shape. When the eggs were cooked enough, Johnny added the hot vegetable filling he had whipped up before and some cheese, before he used his spatula to fold the egg over, creating the perfect omelette.

He served them both from the pan, cutting the large meal into even halves and putting them onto plates. He dusted them lightly with some salt and pepper before serving Taeyong his plate.

Instead of moving to the dining table, or the couch like the last time, Taeyong started eating immediately. Johnny stood between his legs with an amused smile on his face, eating quietly as he watched and listened to Taeyong make yummy moans as he ate. When he was halfway through the omelette, Taeyong asked Johnny what his plans were for the day.

“Well, I’ll have to check in with my grandma and Jaehyun. My cellphone is dead on the floor of your room though,” Johnny chuckled.

“I have a charger you can use,” Taeyong offered, “What about tonight? Are you going home?” he asked. Johnny sucked in a breath, pulling his shoulders back.

“I don’t know. Depends on if my grandmother needs anything. Do you… want me to stay?” Johnny asked hopefully, and Taeyong nodded, the fork in his mouth. That answer made Johnny’s heart warm inside his chest. Taeyong swallowed and then answered.

“Yes, definitely,” he said, “When your phone is working, I’ll give you my actual phone number, so you don’t have to email me.”

It was stupid really, but Johnny’s whole face lit up at the idea of getting to have Taeyong’s cell phone number in his contacts to keep and call whenever he wanted.

“Sounds great,” Johnny said as he took another bite of eggy omelette.

“We can wash your clothes to if you’d like, and definitely take a shower at some point,” Taeyong said, and Johnny suddenly craved a shower quite badly.

“Oh, yeah, that sounds amazing,” he said.

“Good, because showering with a bum leg is a pain in the ass, and I’d really like some support.”

“Yes. Definitely. I’ll do anything you want, Taeyong. Let me make your life easier. You need me to take out the trash, or get something off the top shelf, or move heavy boxes? I am  _ here _ for you,” Johnny said.

“I’m not gonna put you to work,” Taeyong snickered, “although, that  _ is _ a nice gesture, and if I find myself needing to get anything off the top shelf, you’ll be the first one I’ll call.”

Johnny set his empty plate in the sink and then came back to Taeyong on the counter. He put both his hands on Taeyong’s thighs and stood close as Taeyong finished his food.

“I’m really happy,” Johnny mused as he smiled at Taeyong. Even with the omega sitting on top of the counter top, Johnny was pretty sure he was still a little bit taller between the two of them, “I haven’t felt this… fulfilled in months,” he said. Taeyong set his empty plate aside and wove his hands around Johnny’s bare shoulders.

“I know what you mean,” Taeyong whispered and pulled Johnny closer, wrapping his arms around the alpha’s shoulders completely. Johnny pulled Taeyong to the edge of the counter too, the both of them holding the other gently in a warm and adoring embrace. Johnny felt Taeyong nuzzle his face into his neck and felt his whole torso expand as the omega breathed in his scent deeply.

“Ah, you smell so good,” Taeyong whispered, “Has anyone ever told you that you smell like… camping? Like earth and pine trees and ashy campfires right after fresh rain?” he described, and Johnny smiled into Taeyong’s shoulder.

“No,” he said, feeling his heart start to pound, “No one has ever told me that before.”

“Well, you do,” Taeyong said, and he breathed in Johnny’s scent one more time. A slight, odd memory from a few weeks ago popped into his brain, and he pulled away from Taeyong slightly.

“Hey?” Johnny asked, “I know you said this was your business, but… are you still going to take your heat suppressants?” he asked, and Taeyong pulled back a little to look him in the eyes. Johnny thought he might find an accusatory look, but instead Taeyong looked mirthful.

“I didn’t take them yesterday, and I’ll stop taking them all together, if you promise to be here when my heat hits me,” Taeyong said, and Johnny pulled one hand from Taeyong’s hip to hold up his pinky.

“I extra, super- _ duper _ , pinky promise I’ll be here to help you with your heat,” Johnny said, “It’d be, like, the greatest honor and gift, honestly,” he gushed, and Taeyong laughed but linked their pinkies together and shook their hands.

“Good, because after nine months it’s going to hit me like a semi-truck, and it’s going to be  _ bad _ …” the omega said, then murmured truthfully, “…not that my heats are great to begin with.”

Johnny tipped his head to the side in question when he said that, and Taeyong sighed, looking him in the eyes.

“My heats are… terrible, awful, by all standards worse than the average heat. Because most people’s heat averages, like, two to four days, four to six times a year, and my heat is more like is five to seven days at a time, and I’ll get about eight a year,” he said, making Johnny’s eyebrows fly up, “ _ And _ after nine months of not having one, the first one I get after going off the suppressants is just  _ horrendous _ . On top of all that, my heats just… turn me into the worst version of myself,” Taeyong went on ranting, and Johnny stared at him like he wanted to learn all he could from this conversation, “If no one is there to help me, I will—” Taeyong held up his fingers to start listing, “—not eat; I’ll straight up skip  _ days _ of meals because I’m bedridden. Not shower, because I’m  _ incapable _ of leaving my room without help. I become whiny, and needy, and that one’s an understatement. I’ll start  _ crying _ if you leave the room, because I’m just that lost in the uncomfortable heat that is my own flesh,” Taeyong huffed.

“Really?” Johnny said, suppressing a guilty smile at the idea of Taeyong whining with hot need.

“Yes,” he said finally, “Which is the  _ real _ reason why I take heat suppressants during the school year. Because if I didn’t, I’d have to call off weeks’ worth of days,” he finally finished, “my last heat was  _ right _ before school started, and I figured I’d have about a month being suppressant free before I’d have to start taking them again… but then on the second day of school, in the library…” Taeyong left off, and Johnny’s eyebrows shot up into his hairline again, “I couldn’t take any chances around you.”

“What?” Johnny asked lamely, “I… triggered you?”

“A little bit,” Taeyong answered with a nod, “I started heat suppressants that night, and have taken them every evening since.”

With this news, suddenly a whole lot of things started making sense.

“I thought it was odd that you needed to take ‘vitamins’ at the same time every day,” Johnny said, “and the way you acted on the class trip when people found out.”

“Yes,” Taeyong said with a nod, “that’s why I take them, and that’s why I said the things I said and acted the way that I did.”

“Well… I can’t say I’m surprised. Actually, I really understand,” Johnny said, “I mean, I’ll never go through a heat, so I can’t understand that part, but for why you did the things you did,” Johnny mused, and Taeyong put his hands on Johnny’s shoulders.

“You are… so mature for your age,” the older man said, “I’m happy you’re not upset or anything.”

“Why would I be upset?” Johnny asked with a little laugh and pulled Taeyong again into another hug, “I’m happy you told me the truth, and I’m still very honored to be able to help you with your heat when the time comes,” he said. From the other room there was a loud  _ ding _ , and Taeyong pulled away.

“That was the washing machine,” he said, and Johnny scooped Taeyong by the thighs and carried him back to the laundry room, “You don’t have to carry me everywhere,” he said with a laugh.

“No, you don’t understand, I  _ really _ have to,” Johnny said jokingly as he set Taeyong back on the washing machine for a second time, “I’m going to carry you all over this house today. I don’t want you to lift a finger.”

“I mean, I guess I don’t have a choice, do I? If I just get up and start hobbling away, you’re going to stop me,” Taeyong laughed as Johnny pulled the damp comforter from the washing machine and shoved it into the dryer.

“Yes. It’s going to be the worst game of chase in the history of the universe, and I will win,” Johnny proclaimed, and Taeyong chuckled again.

“Well, my phone charger is back in my bedroom, and so is the shower,” he said with a raise of his eyebrows, flirting, “so I guess that’s our next destination.”

Johnny started the dryer and the washing machine for the second load before he stood up straight again and walked back into Taeyong’s open arms.

“Yes, but before we go…” Johnny murmured with a smile as he closed his eyes and stooped his head to kiss Taeyong again. Their lips closed together,  and Johnny could still taste the omelette on Taeyong’s lips, but he loved it all the same.

They returned to the bedroom, and Johnny deposited Taeyong in the master bathroom while he went to go find his phone and a charger. He heard the shower water turn on from behind him.

“Are you getting up to turn on the shower?” Johnny asked accusingly and Taeyong let out a weak:

“… _ Nooo _ ,” his voice cooed guiltily. Johnny was still grinning as he found his phone and the charger in the wall by the bed and left his phone on the side table to charge. He returned to the bathroom and saw Taeyong sitting on the closed toilet lid, undoing the buckles on his splint.

“Need help?” Johnny instantly offered and knelt down to help take off the thick plastic that guarded Taeyong’s tibia and fibula. Taeyong sat back as Johnny finished unbuckling it and opened it from the side like a hinge.

Taeyong’s leg was just a tad paler than the rest of his body, and he could see the indentations of the softer parts of the inside of the splint on his skin. He wasn’t swollen, bruised, or discolored though, which Johnny took as a good sign.

“Does it hurt to stand?” he asked and looked back up into Taeyong’s face.

“Yeah, a little,” he said, and Johnny helped him to his feet again. Johnny tested the water with his hand before he helped Taeyong’s into the shower.

Even though it was the first time they’ve done any of this, it still felt entirely natural to them. Taeyong stood on his right foot, keeping his left a few inches off the ground, and Johnny kept at least one hand on him at all times. The water was deliciously hot, and seeing the way it seeped into Taeyong’s dark hair and streamed down his shoulders and chest made the hair on his arms stand on end.

Taeyong washed first, turned his back to Johnny and washed his hair, and Johnny kept both hands on his hips, their bare feet a few inches from each other. If Taeyong leaned back just a tad, he’d be resting on Johnny’s chest. Johnny watched Taeyong’s hands lather the sweet scented shampoo into his hair, the white foam washing down his body when he rinsed it away.

Johnny helped Taeyong hop to the side when he put the conditioner into his hair, and slicked it all back and out of his angular face. Johnny felt Taeyong’s hands on his bare chest as it became his turn to stand under the stream of hot water. Johnny used Taeyong’s shampoo and conditioner, and then stepped out of the spray to let the conditioner sink into his hair.

Taeyong reached for a bottle of body wash, and Johnny sucked his bottom lip into his mouth as he took the bottle from Taeyong and lathered it across Taeyong’s shoulders, pulling him softly into a wet embrace as the alpha smoothed the soap with flat hands down Taeyong’s back. The omega purred and lifted his hands to hook around Johnny’s shoulder blades so he could hold himself up with Johnny’s sturdy shoulders, as the alpha’s hands washed him.

Johnny felt Taeyong laugh against him when Johnny gripped both his ass cheeks at once, squishing the firm muscle playfully. Johnny felt Taeyong’s hands leave his arms, and Taeyong leaned more into Johnny, then the younger heard the cap of the bottle open again and Taeyong’s hands came back to Johnny’s shoulders and started the same process of washing Johnny’s back.

Johnny tickled Taeyong’s stomach a little, and a slippery, bubbly, tickle fight ensued, making both of them laugh and giggle like children, Johnny being careful not to unbalance Taeyong too much.

Now entirely soapy, they kissed again, and Johnny took Taeyong in his arm and gently walked the two of them back under the warm shower spray. They kissed, eyes closed, water running over the both of them and washing the conditioner out of their hair and the soap from their bodies.

They stayed like that for countless minutes, pressed together, kissing slowly, hot water fading into warm water. The smell of the shampoo and body wash didn’t hide Taeyong’s natural scent, and the omega breathed shakily into Johnny’s mouth after a while, the sound making Johnny’s spine tingle.

“I’m glad you’re here to hold me,” Taeyong whispered, and Johnny’s heart blossomed inside his chest, “but god  _ damn _ do I wish I could stand on both my feet right now.”

“Oh, yeah?” Johnny asked, smiling lazily as he kissed Taeyong’s cheek, and then moved down his jaw to his neck, feeling Taeyong’s fingers tighten around his biceps.

“ _ Yeah _ ,” Taeyong’s voice echoed around the tile walls, “because I want to get on my knees and put you in my mouth right now,” he said. Johnny responded by picking Taeyong up by the back of his thighs once more and pressing him into the cold tile wall completely. The idea of  _ Taeyong’s _ mouth around his—

He growled as Taeyong giggled into his face, and Johnny’s mouth went back to Taeyong’s neck and nipped under his ear. The next sound that came out of Taeyong’s mouth was much more erotic.

Johnny peeled Taeyong off the wall and shut off the shower with one hand. Forgoing towels, Johnny carried Taeyong, both of them wet and dripping, out of the bathroom and pressed them both onto the bare mattress in Taeyong’s room.

Just like in one of Johnny’s fantasies, water droplets clinging to both of them and mingling with their sweat, Johnny ruined the results of their shower by fucking Taeyong once more on the bed. It was like the last nine months had all been washed away, and within a day’s time, the two of them sank comfortably into their undeniable connection. Johnny could never get his fill of the feeling of being surrounded by Taeyong, body and scent, without a single barrier between them. Johnny swore they made music when they came together a second time in twenty-four hours.

Johnny kissed a breathless Taeyong as he counted the hickies he had left on the omega’s neck and chest, and Taeyong’s hands rested limply on the bed above his head.

“Are you going to take a nap?” Johnny whispered.

“Hmmm… only if you’re going to nap here with me,” Taeyong murmured, but his eyes were already closed in relaxed bliss. It took a few minutes for Johnny to be able to pull out from Taeyong once more after knotting him, and Johnny rolled Taeyong onto his side so he could go get another hand towel to clean him up before any of their juices dripped onto the mattress. Johnny wiped up Taeyong’s stomach from cum, before he peeled Taeyong’s legs apart to clean up his entrance as well.

“I’m so happy,” Taeyong murmured sleepily when Johnny returned the soiled towel to the bathroom, finding a hamper this time to leave it in. Johnny smiled ever so fondly down at Taeyong as he returned to the bed, and the omega rolled himself into Johnny’s side once more and rested his head on Johnny’s chest.

“Me too,” Johnny agreed quietly, and he reached for his phone on the bedside table close to them and unplugged it. It had about seventy percent battery, which was good enough, and Johnny turned the phone on and dropped his head back to the bed to kiss the top of Taeyong’s head as he waited for his phone to power up.

There was about ten seconds of post-coital silence before Johnny’s phone started dinging, one right after the other. Taeyong’s body shook with quiet laughter and Johnny couldn’t help but laugh too as his phone kept going.

“You’re so popular,” Taeyong noted, and Johnny snickered.

“Yeah, I completely left Jaehyun’s graduation party without saying goodbye, so I’m sure half of those are from my friends asking where I went.”

“…Are you going to tell them?” Taeyong asked, and Johnny shook his head.

“Not yet. It’s way,  _ way _ too soon,” Johnny said, “I might have to tell Jaehyun though. He’s been waiting for us to get together since, like, Valentine’s Day.”

Johnny checked his phone, and Taeyong turned his head up to look at Johnny’s phone too. Sure enough, Ten, Mark, Lucas, Yuta, and Sicheng all sent him texts asking where he was or where he disappeared to.

“What are you going to tell them?” Taeyong asked.

“That my grandma needed me home,” Johnny said, “some little white lie so they won’t worry. I can tell them all in due time. They don’t need to know our business right away.”

Taeyong felt a smile spread across his whole face when Johnny said ‘their business’, including him.

“Ah, but Jaehyun did send me three texts asking if it went okay,” Johnny said, “Which, it went amazing, by the way, I still think I’m dreaming,” Johnny said, and Taeyong lightly pinched his ribs making Johnny jump.

“I hope you’re not dreaming, I would be so heartbroken,” Taeyong said, and Johnny kissed his forehead once more.

“I guess I’ll just send him… a string of emojis,” Johnny said. Taeyong opened his eyes to see Johnny make a story with his emojis and laughed loudly.

Three thumbs up, an eggplant, a peach, three party streamers, and five water drips.

“Absolutely not!” Taeyong laughed and tried to grab the phone from Johnny’s hand, who was chuckling heartily at Taeyong’s response.

“No, I think it’s perfect!” Johnny snickered.

“ _ Johnny Suh _ , if you send that nasty text, you’re gonna be in big trouble!!” Taeyong said, his voice half joking but half serious. Johnny knew he’d never send Jaehyun that kind of explicit, but also covert, text so he erased all those emojis and put one of every heart emoji instead.

“How about that?” he asked, looking for Taeyong’s approval.

“Yes, that’s  _ much _ more acceptable,” Taeyong said and reached his hand up to hit the send button on Johnny’s phone, as the alpha chuckled beside him, “Jaehyun’s not going to tell anyone just because the school year is over, right?” Taeyong asked warily.

“No. He’s a good guy, and he knows it’s my right to tell people when I think it’s right,” Johnny said and then leaned down and kissed Taeyong’s head again, “Correction: when  _ we _ think it’s right.”

“Let me see your phone,” Taeyong requested as he reached his hand up again, and Johnny passed him his cellphone. The younger watched as Taeyong exited out of his messages to his home screen and snorted as he saw the picture of himself with pink hair in class, the candid photo Johnny had taken after the sports festival, “ _ Really _ ?” Taeyong asked, “You know, if you had asked I would have posed for a real picture for you.”

“Next time,” Johnny said, and Taeyong snickered as he opened Johnny’s contacts and created his own, putting in his name and personal cell number.

“There,” Taeyong said and handed the phone back to Johnny.

“You misspelled your name, silly,” Johnny cooed as he pressed on Taeyong’s name and added the heart emoji to the end of it, making Taeyong burst into gleeful laughter.

“Oh, you’re right, I’m sorry,” Taeyong managed out through his giggles.

They ended up spending the rest of the day into the afternoon together; Johnny finished up Taeyong’s laundry and had his clothes from last night in the dryer. He made Taeyong’s bed, and they ordered delivery for their late lunch.

When the sun was starting to set, Johnny got a text message from his grandma asking where he was, and Johnny sighed. He and Taeyong were on the couch together, eating lukewarm noodles and cuddling. Taeyong was in Johnny’s lap, his head against Johnny’s chest, and his leg, now back in the splint, stretched out comfortably across the length of the couch.

“Hmm?” Taeyong asked at Johnny’s sigh.

“I need to go home after my laundry is done,” Johnny murmured, and he felt Taeyong deflate against him.

“ _ Boo _ ,” Taeyong said, making Johnny laugh, “Do you have to?”

“Yeah, my grandma needs me to check in, and I should probably get some of my own clothes before I come back,”

“Will you come back tonight?” Taeyong bartered.

“It might be late by the time I could get back here,” Johnny reasoned, leaning down to smell Taeyong’s scent through the top of his head, never able to get enough of it.

“That’s okay, I’ll stay up for you,” Taeyong stated and stretched his arm up and behind Johnny’s head, caressing the back of his neck. Johnny bent down and kissed the back of Taeyong’s ear, his heart fluttering at the idea of being welcomed back so quickly.

Johnny got up off the couch when the dryer dinged, and he left Taeyong’s pajamas in the laundry room as he changed back into the clean outfit he had arrived in. He ordered another taxi on his phone as he went back out to lounge again on the couch with his new lover, who kissed him sweetly again.

When the taxi texted telling him he had arrived, Johnny got up off the couch half-heartedly, and Taeyong stood up too, grabbing the crutch Johnny had fetched for him earlier.

Taeyong hopped over to the front door with him, and before Johnny could leave, Taeyong reached for a little nook in the foyer by a shoe box and handed Johnny something. Johnny opened his palm and Taeyong dropped the small golden key into his palm.

“For you,” Taeyong said as he smiled up at Johnny, “So you can let yourself in anytime.”

Johnny’s eyes widened, and he scooped Taeyong into a hug and kissed him on the lips in gratitude.

“Thank you, again, I’m so honored. I’ll put it on my keyring right now so I’ll never lose it.”

“Good,” Taeyong said, smiling, “I’ll see you tonight?”

“Yeah, I’ll see you tonight,” Johnny said and kissed Taeyong one more time in the open doorway before he left, the cab outside waiting for him. When he looked back, he saw Taeyong standing in the doorway, watching him leave with his head resting against the open door, and Johnny waved to him, earning a wave back and a laugh.

~

In the next five days, Johnny was over at Taeyong’s for four of them. The one night they both reluctantly decided that Johnny should stay at home in his own bed was the worst night of sleep Johnny had ever experienced in his entire life.

He couldn’t get comfortable. He rolled this way and that, snuggled his pillow, kicked off his blankets, took off all his clothes, pulled his blankets back over him, and finally at two in the morning, his phone buzzed from his bedside table and Johnny sighed, exasperated as he opened his eyes and reached for his glowing phone. It was a single text from Taeyong.

‘ _ Well, I can’t sleep :( _ ’ he said simply, and Johnny replied:

‘ _ Same _ …’

He managed to fall asleep around three or four am, and woke up at nine, groggy and in need of coffee. He dressed, mind foggy, and stumbled down the stairs, where he was greeted cheerfully by his grandmother.

“Oh my gosh! It’s my grandson!” she teased, “I didn’t think you were ever going to come home,” she chuckled and came over and gave him a doting hug from the side, and smelled his shoulder, “Hmm… I know that smell,” she said, and Johnny froze, “that smells like the boy who brought you soup that one time,” she said deviously, and Johnny smiled.

“You remember that?” he asked.

“Of course!” she chirped and smacked her grandson lightly on the arm with the newspaper she had in her hand, “You know… I brought your grandfather soup once when he was sick, before we got together. We were in middle school,” she recalled, and Johnny looked down at her with curious eyes.

“Really?” he asked, astonished. She nodded deeply.

“Mm-hmm,” she hummed, “and a week after that, he came to school with a little bouquet of hand-picked wildflowers from the lot be used to live by. He gave them to me and asked me to sit by him at lunch that day at school, and  _ ohh _ all my girlfriends were jealous! After school that day, he walked me all the way home like a gentleman. And what do you know? Years down the line, he was the man I married,” she said.

“That’s adorable! How come you’ve never told me that story before?” Johnny asked her as he took a sip of his coffee, feeling more awake than ever.

“I don’t know…” she mumbled, but then elbowed her grandson in the side, “But the moral of the story? There’s something to be said about going out of your way to bring someone soup when they’re sick,” she winked at him, and Johnny nearly snorted into his cup but could feel the blush rising over his cheeks at being discovered, but not in the way that he most feared. She went on to gush about how ‘ _ In the old days, alphas had to protect and look after omegas, but all that’s changed now. Relationships are about taking care of each other _ , _ and it doesn’t really matter what gender they are _ ,’ and Johnny sat at the kitchen table and listened to her chitter on about her life dating Johnny’s grandpa when they were young.

That day, Johnny had gotten clearance from his grandmother to borrow her car, and Johnny let her know that he was going to be staying the night at his friend’s place. His grandmother called him out as he walked out the front door with his backpack packed full of clothes.

“You know he’s not your friend if your scents are all over each other like that. You can call him your friend, but you can’t hide the facts, John-ah,” she called, and he spun around, red-faced at being caught, again.

“Grandma!” he gaped, “It’s true but you shouldn’t say that!!” he laughed.

“You think you can hide these things from me, but you can’t,” she called from the living room, “Have a nice night! Be safe!” she sang, and Johnny shut and locked the door, his mind spinning.

He drove to Taeyong’s house with a smile on his face. Telling his grandmother that he was in a relationship was a difficult topic but it seemed he underestimated her. He got to Taeyong’s place and parked in the garage. He heard music playing from inside the house before he even got to the door, and Johnny swung his keys around his finger merrily as he hopped up Taeyong’s front steps and used his loaned house key to unlock the door.

The moment he stepped inside, he was slammed with Taeyong’s scent in a way that he hadn’t been in nearly ten months. It was about five times stronger than yesterday, like a gigantic veil had been lifted from him, and the inside of Taeyong’s home smelled like a bakery.

Suddenly, Johnny had a flashback to the first day of school, and the smell of the classroom on that first day knocked the rationality out of him. He ripped his shoes off and shut the door, locking it after him as he inhaled the smell of…

Yeasty, buttery, flaky pastries rolled in cinnamon, and cloves, and the sunbaked earth.

One moment, Johnny was easily strolling into the house, the next, he was stalking the object of his affection. He rounded the corner and saw Taeyong standing behind the couch with the television remote in his hand, humming to the melody of the music, and he smiled at Johnny as he entered the room.

Johnny felt like he flew to Taeyong, and he couldn’t even wait to be embraced by him completely and he swept the omega into his arms from behind like he had wanted to do nine and a half months ago and buried his face in Taeyong’s hair and neck.

He didn’t even manage to speak out his hello before he silenced Taeyong’s with his smothering embrace, holding Taeyong’s back to his chest. Johnny inhaled Taeyong’s homey, natural scent like a drug as he raked his hands down Taeyong’s torso, making Taeyong squeak out of surprise.

“ _ Haa _ ! Johnny!” he mewled.

“You smell… so fucking good…” Johnny’s voice dripped out of his mouth, and he couldn’t control the need he felt to get Taeyong absolutely naked right then.

“ _ Ah _ ,” Taeyong moaned, and he reached his hands up to touch Johnny’s neck and shoulders, arching his back against Johnny’s stomach, “Yeah, I…” his voice trailed off as Johnny’s lips and teeth met the side of his neck, “I’m clean of suppressants by now…” he breathed out, and Johnny took Taeyong by the hips and bent him over the back of the couch, presenting his ass and hips to the air and pulling his feet off the floor. Taeyong dropped the remote, “Johnny!” he cried in surprise, and the young alpha couldn’t help himself as he pulled down his lover’s sweatpants to his knees, not caring enough to take them off completely over his splint.

Johnny dropped to his knees and buried his mouth in between Taeyong’s ass cheeks, making the omega over the couch shriek in surprise.

Johnny was determined to make Taeyong wet so he could taste what Taeyong was like without those pesky suppressants clouding his natural, irresistible sent. Taeyong grunted and moaned under his tongue and lips, his whole body twitching and responding to him.

In no time at all, Johnny was knotting Taeyong, too rushed to even take off his shirt or pants, or move them to the bedroom, or shut the blinds on the windows; the only thing that was in his mind was cumming deep into Taeyong and making the omega cum too.

When they finished, Johnny bent over Taeyong’s back and sweetly, apologetically, kissed Taeyong on the cheek.

“Hey,” he gasped out, “I’m back.”

“Hi,” Taeyong responded in a thin and weak voice, his face half pressed into the couch still, “I missed you,” he added, and Johnny pushed his hair out of his lover’s face and kissed him softly on the temple again.

“I missed you too,” he said with a quiet, breathy laugh, staying right where he was until he softened enough to remove himself from Taeyong and go clean them up.

~

Johnny was laying on the couch, his heart heavy, and his head in Taeyong’s lap as the omega softly stroked his hair. After breakfast, the younger had made Taeyong comfortable on the couch with his legs up, still insisting that Taeyong take it easy even though he had been wearing the splint for just over a month now and could technically start walking and putting more weight on it. Taeyong was lounging back against the sectional, his legs stretched out across the longer part of the couch and Johnny curled on his side, mirroring the position they had accidentally gotten into at Christmas time. Johnny had been sighing heavily since last night, feeling forlorn as he tried to drown out his reality by pretending if he fell asleep here on the couch with his mate, he’d wake up in July and it would all be over before it began.

Johnny had his eyes closed, trying to embed Taeyong’s scent in his nose while he still could, and after countless minutes he heard the television shut off.

He wasn’t even watching it, or paying attention, but when the background noise was silenced, it left a soft ringing in his ears.

“Johnny,” Taeyong’s voice coaxed lightly, “It’s almost two,” he reminded, and Johnny groaned and buried his face deeper into Taeyong’s lap.

“Noooo,” he moaned, “can I just… tell him an emergency came up, and that I can’t go?” he said.

“You’re way past the point of making an excuse. Your flight leaves in two hours, and if we don’t leave soon, we’ll hit traffic.”

Johnny nuzzled closer again, fake whining.

“I don’t want to leave,” he cried, the sound muffled by Taeyong’s jeans.

“I know, but it’s only two weeks, and you’ll be home before you know it,” Taeyong said, his fingers gliding through Johnny’s thick hair again, “besides, you’re going to be seeing your dad, and your friends, and  _ Julia _ ,” he reminded. Johnny rolled his head to the side so he can be heard clearer.

“I do want to see Julia,” he conceded, and Taeyong nudged the sulking twenty-year-old off his lap, making him sit up.

“You’ll only be in Chicago for two weeks, and I’ll be the one to pick you up at the airport, and you’ll be home in time for my birthday,” Taeyong said, trying to cheer Johnny up, when really he didn’t want his mate to leave either. He knew the next two weeks of sleep were going to be awful, and he was going to miss his young alpha terribly, but this was one of those times where he had to pretend to be the mature one.

“And! And, I put three of my own shirts into your suitcase so you can take a piece of me with you to sleep at night,” he said, trying to cheer Johnny up. He could still see the slump in his shoulders, even as he smiled at that last one.

“I actually have a couple shirts for you too,” Johnny said, “and, I know I’m being moody. I’m just going to miss you,” he admitted. Taeyong leaned forward, hiding his hurt heart over the fact that he was going to be missing Johnny more, and kissed his lover on the cheek.

“It’s only two weeks,” he said again, saying it to himself too. They both had known for the last ten days that Johnny was going to be going on this trip. Johnny has known since before graduation, but it had slipped his mind as he and Taeyong had grown closer in these last two weeks since summer break started.

“Yeah, I know,” Johnny sighed again, “It’s just… I feel like I just got you, and I don’t want to leave when I just… finally got you,” he said stiffly, but from the heart.

“I’ll be right here when you get back,” Taeyong promised, “I’m not going anywhere,” he assured.

Taeyong, true to his word, rode with Johnny in the taxi to the airport and kissed him goodbye before Johnny got out of the backseat of the car. Taeyong said he could come inside and stand in line with Johnny before he went up to the security gate, but Johnny told him to stay, and that Johnny didn’t want him hobbling around the airport on his crutches.

“Text and call me,” Taeyong said before Johnny got out of the car.

“I’ll make us a time schedule, for when we’re both awake,” the younger promised and took Taeyong’s face in one hand when they kissed goodbye. Taeyong’s heart clenched when Johnny said goodbye to him one more time and got out of the car, shutting the door after him, and leaving Taeyong alone in the backseat of the taxi. Johnny took his stuffed luggage out of the trunk of the taxi, and stood on the curb with his backpack around one shoulder and the suitcase next to him.

They waved to each other as the car pulled away, and Taeyong tried to put on a smile for Johnny, but the second he turned away, he had to fish a tissue out of his pocket.

It was going to be a  _ long _ two weeks.

~

Julia and his dad picked him up at the airport, and Julia was the first person to hug him when he got onto American soil. He smiled at her and wrote his eyebags off as getting terrible sleep on the plane, when really, he had been struggling not to cry too much at the crushing feelings of being separated from Taeyong.

Chicago in the summer was fine; it wasn’t gloomy, or muggy, but mild in temperature and kind of relaxing. The only hard part was those minutes when he shut the door and crawled into an empty bed before sleep. He would text Taeyong goodnight, curl his face into his lover’s tee-shirt to feel his scent, and find some rest. Johnny was able to call Taeyong in the evenings, when it was late morning or early afternoon in Korea, and they texted nearly the entire time when either of them were awake.

They relayed the goings on of their days. Johnny had a busy day every day, and he was happy to hear Taeyong was out doing things to get himself out of the house. He saw his parents and sister, and hung out with the music department teachers, and went to the doctor to get his leg checked out.

Every moment he wasn’t occupied, he was worried about Taeyong; which was stupid, because Taeyong was perfectly self-sufficient, even when he was on crutches.

His old friends from his early middle and high school days were a blessing, because seeing them all really made Johnny temporarily forget his hollowness over being away from his new mate. He saw an ex, by coincidence, and realized he hadn’t thought about them once since he moved to Korea and how much happier he was now that he found home back in Seoul. His friends asked him if he was ever coming back for good, and Johnny told them about finding his mate in Korea, and about how he was the one who helped push Johnny onto this career path of becoming a pianist, and how much he loved living with his grandmother and the new friends he had made back home.

_ Home _ .

He referred to Korea as his home in nearly every conversation he had while he was in America, inadvertently, and sometimes on purpose when he was within earshot of his father.

His dad was busy majority of the time, like Johnny expected, so he got to hang out with Julia nearly the entire time he was there.

He told Julia about Taeyong and how much he missed him. He would have told her about Taeyong being his teacher just a few weeks prior, but while he trusted Julia, he didn’t know if he trusted her keeping his secrets from his father, so he kept that detail to himself and omitted it from his retellings.

They went to the aquarium and they went shopping, and Julia promised him that she’d make sure whatever he couldn’t fit in a suitcase she’s have shipped to his house.

His dad took Johnny out for a ‘man-to-man’ day on his day off. They went golfing, of all things, and his dad flexed his wallet at a fancy lunch and bought him an expensive bag of coffee beans to take home. His dad said they had an appointment at a tailor, and Johnny was encouraged to pick out any suit in the shop, and his father would have it fitted for him. Johnny picked an excellent light grey gingham suit that he put on, and it fit alright, but then he was pushed up onto a stool and the tailor measured him. He pinned the suit and pants in the right ways, and the slick outfit was then tailored for him right there on the spot, ready to be picked up in two days after the alterations were complete. After he had changed out of the suit, his dad bought him new leather boots, a textured black tie, and a fancy watch to complete the set.

His dad told him he wanted Johnny to wear this outfit when they went to tour his dad’s office and go to the courthouse together. Johnny didn’t tell his father he wasn’t interested, but he let off that silent vibe. He didn’t protest though. If his dad was going to spoil him with material gifts, Johnny might as well accept the game and play ‘take-your-kid-to-work-day’ for his dad.

Two days after, his suit was ready to be picked up, and Johnny and Julia went down together for a fitting. When Johnny pulled on the pants, the white shirt, and the coat, he felt something tingle inside of him.

As someone who loved fashion but had a hard time finding clothing in his size that looked good, putting on a suit that was literally cut and sewn for him and him only felt like slipping his cold hand into a warm fitted glove. The grey suit contoured him in every aspect; he adjusted the tie in the mirror and didn’t want to look away because he looked  _ good _ .

He looked expensive and in charge, like a young CEO who should be driving a Bentley or a Tesla. It took the black, frumpy suit he had worn second-hand for his piano recital and made that look like a painting smock. He exited the fitting room and stepped onto the podium to look at himself in an even bigger set of mirrors as the tailor came up and did a final measurement. Julia clapped for him.

“Wow! You look five years older wearing that!” she chirped, and Johnny took out his cellphone and snapped some great pictures of him modeling in the completed, tailored outfit. The pants were fitted from crotch, to thigh, all the way to the ankle, and reminded Johnny that he had an envious figure. His shoulders look broader than usual in a suit that tapered at his waist and fit shoulders perfectly, and Johnny felt a little like a peacock as he pushed back his hair with one hand and cocked his knee out in a chic pose.

“I can’t wait to send this to everyone I know,” he said, “Can I wear this out of the store? I feel fancy.”

“You  _ should _ feel fancy. Is this your first suit?” Julia asked.

“It’s my first special order suit,” Johnny said. The tailor checked him out quietly, and told Johnny that he had his measurements, and that if he’d ever like to order another suit, he could and they’d ship it for him without him having to come in and try it on. Johnny’s head reeled as they left, but his strides were long and confident. He opened every door for Julia, even her car door, and she grinned at him cheekily.

“You like this, don’t you?” she asked.

“It’s intoxicating. This suit is going right to my head,” he said. When they were in the car, Johnny sent his friends in Korea the best picture of him in the grey suit, but to Taeyong he sent all of the pictures he had taken. It was about eight in the morning for Taeyong, so Johnny knew it wasn’t too early for him, and he got a text back not too long after.

‘ _ WOW! Please tell me you’re bringing that suit home with you? _ ’ he asked.

‘ _ Yes! It’s tailored for me! A gift from my dad. _ ’ Johnny replied.

‘ _ Good, it looks great! Um. By the way. Remember when we talked about fantasies? I need you to wear that for me sometime. It’d be much appreciated _ .’ Taeyong said, and Johnny frantically texted back.

‘ _ Down. Down. Down. Down. SO DOWN _ .’ he needed to turn his phone away from him before he got dirty thoughts about having sex with his lover while he was wearing the suit and Taeyong was bent over the dining room table wearing nothing.

~

Johnny’s dad had a meeting that he and Julia needed to attend at his dad’s work, and Johnny stayed home at his dad’s house alone for what felt like the first time since he’d been to Chicago. Tomorrow was the day he was going to go to his dad’s work in his new suit and then go sit through a day at court and watch his dad ‘do his thing’ which Johnny was very unenthused over, but it was the least he could do, seeing as his dad had flown him out here and bought him a bunch of nice stuff.

Johnny considered this day, the day before he was supposed to follow his dad around the professional world of lawyers, his only day off. He had a bowl of cereal for lunch, watched television, and played a little with his dad’s decorative grand piano. Around four o’clock, his dad and Julia came home. Johnny chatted with them for a minute, feeling antsy because he knew that Taeyong was going to texting him soon, and his father informed him that their meeting went very well and that the three of them were going to go out for a nice dinner that night.

Johnny was only half listening, and the moment he heard his phone chiming, he excused himself and picked his phone out of his pocket as he made his way back to his room to have his phone call privately.

“Good morning!” Johnny chirped into the receiver, even though it was almost dinner time for him in America, Taeyong had probably just woken up.

“ _ Johnny, we have a problem _ ,” Taeyong said, and Johnny’s stomach dropped at the urgent tone in Taeyong’s voice.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, immediately. Taeyong was breathing a little roughly and there was rustling in the background of the phone.

“ _ I woke up this morning, and my heat is coming. I can feel it. It’s coming and it’s going to be here tonight _ ,” he stressed, frantic. Johnny felt his brain short circuit. He’d only been in Chicago for nine days, and he still had another five until his scheduled flight back home.

“Where are you?” Johnny asked, as he looked around the room he was inhabiting and saw his clothing all over the place. He walked over to his half-packed suitcase and hauled it up onto the bed by the handle, his mind and body going into overdrive.

“ _ I’m in the car on the way to the butcher, I need to get things to cook and store. Then I’m going back home to get as much as I can ready. I thought I was going to have another week but I don’t, and… Johnny, I’m freaking out _ ,” Taeyong admitted, his voice breaking near the end.

“I’m packing my bag now. I’m going to get the next flight home. Taeyong, I  _ promise _ you I will be there,” he said, “I’m so sorry that I’m not there right now,” his voice strained as he started throwing his clothes into his suitcase without regard for how any of it fit.

“ _ It’s going to be a fourteen-hour flight, you’ll be too late _ ,” Taeyong’s voice murmured.

“I’ll be late, but I’ll be there,” Johnny said again, “Taeyong, I  _ promise _ .”

_ “…Okay _ ,” Taeyong said after a moment.

“I’ll see you very soon,” Johnny said, “Just hold on for me.”

“ _ Okay. I’ll see you soon _ ,” Taeyong responded, and the two of them said their goodbyes and hung up. Johnny tossed his phone onto the bed and immediately took his only clean pair of jeans left and yanked them out of his bag along with a hoodie to wear on the plane. From behind him, there was a soft knock on the door of his room.

He turned and saw Julia standing there in the open door, her eyes concerned as her gaze swept the scene of Johnny frantically packing.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“My mate,” Johnny answered as he swept up his clothing from around the side of the bed, “His heat is coming, and it’s his first once since being with me, and I promised him I’d be there for it. I need to go home,” Johnny said.

“What!?” Johnny heard his father’s voice raise from the other room, and then the sound of his shoes approaching Johnny’s temporary bedroom.

“I need my flights switched. I need to go back to Korea  _ now _ ,” Johnny said, bracing himself for the backlash of his father’s anger and annoyance.

“No. Absolutely not,” his father growled from behind Julia, “Tomorrow is a very important day, and I want you there with me.”

“ _ Dad _ ,” Johnny spat and threw the shirts he had just picked up into his open luggage with force, “I know you’ve been looking forward to this but, honestly,  _ man to man _ —” he said, quoting a phrase his father had said more than once on his visit, “—me going to work with you is  _ not _ going to change my mind. I’m still going to go to music school in Seoul,” Johnny said, his shoulders rising and falling with his breaths as he stood his ground, “I’m grateful for all you’ve done for me, and I love that you have pride in your job, but I have something happening right now that I need to take care of. Back home,” he finished.

“Oh, your  _ mate _ ?” his dad spat back, hissing at the term with venom, “An omega thousands of miles away is taking precedence over your own father?”

“He’s not any omega!” Johnny barked, waiting for this conversation to come up since the moment he mentioned Taeyong’s name, “He’s more than that. And right now, he needs me,” Johnny said, “You don’t  _ need  _ me, dad, you just want me there so you can show off more of your life. Don’t get me wrong, it’s an amazing life!” Johnny scraped together, “You have a great job, and live in a beautiful house, and the woman who you’re marrying is stellar. Honestly, Julia—” Johnny said and turned his focus to her for a moment, “You’re great for him. You’re patient and kind, and I can’t picture a better match for my dad,” Johnny said, seeing both the adults physically defuse a little as Johnny said that, and then he turned his attention back to his father, “but my perfect match… the one who compliments  _ my _ personality, and who  _ I  _ want to one day get a beautiful house with… is having his first heat in ten _ months _ , and he  _ needs _ me,” Johnny said.

“ _ What _ ?” Julia dropped, her head lowering in seriousness, “Ten months?! Was he on suppressants?” she asked.

“ _ Yes _ ,” Johnny stressed. Julia stared at Johnny for a second, before she turned to her fiancé.

“You have to change his flight,” she said, making both the men turn to look at her with shock.

“ _ Julie _ —” his dad started, but Julia interrupted him in a way that only two people in love can.

“—No, Jungwon,  _ listen _ ,” she said, her voice dipping into a tone Johnny hadn’t heard from her until just now and even he felt his heart skip a beat at the way she took over this situation, “You’ve never had a heat. You’ll  _ never _ know the agony of being in heat,” she said, “but just imagine the most frustration and helplessness you’ve ever felt, and then multiply that feeling by ten until you can’t breathe, or move,” she said, “I need your help when I get like that, and now your son’s mate needs his help. Johnny is trying to be the most supportive person he can be toward the person he loves, and this is how he does it. He can go to work with you another time, but your son needs to go home now.”

Johnny took a second to watch his father’s face harden and his jaw clench, but then he watched his dad take a long breath through his nose and then exhale and turn to leave the hallway.

“Fine. Change your flight. I’ll order something for dinner so you can eat before you leave,” he muttered as he walked away.

Julia watched him leave, then turned back to Johnny who was staring at her with stars in his vision.

“Thank you,” Johnny said sincerely, and she smiled and nodded at him.

“I know how your mate feels,” Julia said, “let me go get your father’s tablet, and I’ll help you arrange your flight.”

In no time at all, Johnny was packed. He couldn’t fit his new suit, or a good amount of the new clothes he had purchased while in Chicago into his bag, but Julia promised him she would have it all shipped to him. She changed his flight, and now in three hours, Johnny would be going home.

He sent a text to Taeyong, updating him on his new flight schedule.

‘ _ I’ll be there tomorrow morning. It’s going to be okay. You’ve got this _ ,’ he typed.

‘ _ Okay, thank you. I miss you and can’t wait for you to be here _ .’ Taeyong sent back a couple minutes later, and it made Johnny’s heart clench inside his chest. God, he missed Taeyong too.

The next hour and a half was awkward in Johnny’s dad’s home. They ate pizza, and his father sulked at not getting his way, but Johnny had to let it roll off his shoulders. Julia offered to drive him to the airport, and Johnny thanked her repeatedly for being amazing, helping him out, hanging out with him, and standing up for him against his father.

When she pulled up outside the airport drop off, she wished him good luck and got out of the car to hug him goodbye. Johnny gave her a very long hug and thanked her once more before telling her again that he really liked her, and couldn’t wait for her to be a part of his family. She looked a little teary eyed when Johnny pulled away and she wished him good luck and a safe flight.

~

It was a fourteen-hour flight that felt like fourteen years. He managed to get a few hours of sleep to break up the time, but most of it was spent with him gripping the arm rests and tapping his feet.

When the plane finally landed, it took twenty minutes for everyone to disembark. Johnny was overly annoyed, and he could feel people’s eyes looking back to judge him and his impatience. When he finally made it out of the plane and into the airport, he walked to the first coffee vendor he saw and waited in line for a large black coffee, knowing that he was going to have to wait for his luggage at the baggage claim anyway, he might as well get caffeinated to make up for his terrible sleep.

He took a short moment, after he had sent Taeyong a text informing him he was at the airport now, to appreciate the voices all around him. Lots of Korean, a little English, Japanese, and Chinese, but mostly… Korean. The second he got his hands around his tall cup of hot coffee, he made his way to the baggage claim and felt his anxiety simmer down a little bit.

When he got to the conveyor belts where the luggage would come out one by one, he ordered a taxi on his phone and waited, sipping his coffee. When the bags from his flight started entering the baggage claim, Johnny moved forward so he could grab his bag and high tail it out of the airport. He was thankful he didn’t have to wait long, and he grabbed his heavy rolling luggage and started off towards the pick-up and drop-off port right outside the doors of the airport.

He found the taxi he had ordered and put his bag in the trunk, before slipping into the backseat. He gave the man Taeyong’s address, and the car started pulling away. He sat back and tried to be calm, the drive was going to take about a half hour.

“How was the flight?” the cab driver asked, being friendly.

“Long,” Johnny answered, “And my mate is at home waiting for me,” he added.

“Ah, I’ll get you there quick,” the driver vowed, and Johnny looked out the window at the scenery of Seoul passing them by. He realized that he had just referred to Taeyong’s house as his home just then, and he wrung his hands on his knees.

Before long, his foot started tapping impatiently again.

~

He slammed the trunk of the cab shut after he pulled his suitcase out of the back of it, and the taxi driver thanked him for his tip before driving away. Johnny rushed up the driveway of Taeyong’s house and fumbled with his keys, wanting them ready by the time he got to the front door. He unlocked the door and stepped inside, pulling his suitcase behind him.

The familiarity and comfort of being back in Taeyong’s house after ten days was cathartic, and he took off his shoes quietly. The house didn’t smell different, which was interesting to Johnny. He expected the smell to be stronger.

“Taeyong?” he called as he left his luggage in the foyer to worry about later. He passed the kitchen and saw a mess of bowls and pans in the sink, the cutting board still out, and the trash full. That wasn’t like Taeyong, whose kitchen was normally spotless. 

“Taeyong?” he called again, and as he entered the hallway, he smelt it.

_ This  _ was the smell he was anticipating. Thick, heavy, and powerful. Johnny felt his hair stand on end all over his body under his clothes as he came closer to Taeyong’s bedroom door which was left ajar. He pushed open the door and was met by the sight and the smell of omega in heat.

Taeyong was curled on his side on top of the bed, fully naked, in a nest of his own creation. The blankets were different, instead of the silver-grey one, there was a plushy, red throw blanket over the top of it all that looked ultra-soft. There were more pillows on the bed than usual, and they were curled around his form. The curtains were drawn and the room was dim. Taeyong’s face was pressed into a sweater that Johnny instantly realized was on of his that he purposefully left behind. One of Taeyong’s hands was gripping the knit sweater, and the other hand was between his legs. His skin glowed from the sweat that coated him, and he could hear his small whimpers from under the sweater.

Johnny’s eyes fell to the splint that was on the floor at the foot of the bed, and then his eyes roved back up Taeyong’s form, his bare feet and legs, his hips lightly rocking into his other hand. It seemed like he hadn’t realized Johnny was there yet, but the alpha was now hyper aware of his mate. Johnny started taking off his hoodie as he went immediately to the bed and knelt onto it, alerting Taeyong of his presence.

 

~

 

Taeyong’s whole body reacted to the feeling of someone in his bed and he flinched, startled. His head turning up to see who was there, scared it might be someone he didn’t know, breaking and entering and finding him, but when his eyes found Johnny’s, his mouth fell open in a wordless cry. His face was pink and flushed and his pupils were blown, his lips were thick and red, and his eyes were watery. The moment he saw Johnny undressing above him, Taeyong moaned in desperation and his hands tried to reach out for his mate, but he couldn’t lift himself up off the bed to grab at him.

This past day had been terrible and being alone as it finally came over him made him cry and writhe in his bed all night. He felt too heavy, too hot, and too held down by the pulsing waves of heat throughout his whole body. He watched Johnny’s eyes flicker from brown to scarlet, but it didn’t scare him like the first couple times he saw Johnny get like that. It made him feel more heated than before, and he felt his entrance flutter as his mind registered that he was finally together with Johnny again.

“J-Johnny,” Taeyong cried, his voice breaking. Taeyong felt the tears, and he couldn’t stop them from dripping down from the corners of his eyes. He was too overwhelmed by these rushing feelings and sensations, and the moment Johnny had his hands on his hips, Taeyong was shaking and near sobbing.

“Taeyong,” Johnny whispered, and the omega felt his skin zing at the sound of Johnny saying his name. The alpha draped himself over the smaller man and felt his overly heated skin, joining him fully on the bed now that he was free of his clothes too, “Why aren’t you wearing your splint?” his alpha asked, and Taeyong knew the answer, but his brain couldn’t make his mouth say the right words.

“Too hot,” he whispered, his breaths becoming erratic now, “please…” he whispered, and Johnny came down to kiss him. It was a ‘hello’ kiss, but it was also a desperate longing kiss from days of separation.

“When did you eat last?” Johnny asked, remembering their conversation from a couple weeks ago, and Taeyong moaned impatiently.

“I don’t know…” he whimpered.

“ _ Taeyong _ ?” the younger urged.

“I don’t  _ know _ ,” he cried again, his brain unable to make proper thoughts through the cloud of heat. Johnny’s worried, deep voice was sending him spiraling, and it didn’t help when Johnny kissed his lips again. Taeyong couldn’t stand it, he couldn’t handle just being kissed, and he tried to turn over onto his stomach.

“ _ Johnny _ ,” he whined through the kisses, and the younger male got the hint and helped push Taeyong over, making sure his left leg was still fine.

With the heavy scent of omega in the air, Johnny was nearly all the way erect without any stimulation or foreplay. He took his cock in his hand and tried to slide it through the cleft of Taeyong’s ass, but his cockhead bumped something hard and foriegn where he expected to meet hot and wet. He looked down and saw the loop of a silicon sex toy in Taeyong’s entrance, and he felt a wave of arousal flood through him. He reached down for the toy and pushed it inwards slightly, making Taeyong moan loudly, before he withdrew it.

The toy was long and tapered so it stayed in place, and the moment the widest part of it popped out of Taeyong, long streams of clear slick dripped out and the smell of Taeyong’s heat shook his brain up.

Taeyong smelled like… sticky, hot, cinnamon rolls like this. The pastry, the vanilla, the spice. He let out his own appreciative groan, and he tossed the toy off the bed without any care.

“Please... please... please...” Taeyong panted, his hips jerking onto nothing, and Johnny lined himself up with Taeyong’s entrance. The omega’s dripping pucker opened for him more naturally than ever before, and Johnny didn’t have to time to ease in slowly.

At any other moment, Johnny loved the foreplay; the slow build, the warm up, the easing into it... but today was not that moment.

His eyes shut with appreciation as he slid into Taeyong from tip to very base in one easy push, and Taeyong yelled, his voice shooting out of him and his whole body wracking with shakes. Taeyong’s walls accepted his length like he had never felt before, and Johnny gripped Taeyong’s body, his arms pulling the omega to him and shushing him into his ear.

Taeyong was writhing against his hold, his hips and butt rocking back into him wildly and without restraint. Johnny tried quieting him again, but Taeyong was moaning so uncontrollably, and it took him a few moments to realize that the moment Johnny had entered him, Taeyong had came.

His lithe body was undulating against him, unable to fight the waves of pleasure and the need for more, as his little cock pulsed and streamed all over the blankets. Before Taeyong could even come down, Johnny grabbed Taeyong’s right leg, pulled him up by his thigh and held Taeyong open as he dragged his hips back against the will of Taeyong’s greedy entrance and slammed forward for a second time. Taeyong was grunting, moaning, crying into the pillows, his leg flexed, and his hips rutting back against Johnny’s frantic thrusts as Johnny started at a fast tempo.

The smell of Taeyong’s sweat soaked hair, and the silky slide of Taeyong’s overheated sex made Johnny lose his mind. He sank into the heat with Taeyong as his mind quieted and on the horizon he only sought one thing. All thoughts of talking, sharing stories, asking questions were pushed out of his mind as his new objectives to knot, please, and cum inside Taeyong took precedence.

If he thought Taeyong was loud when they had sex before, it was nothing compared sex when Taeyong was in heat, because the older omega couldn’t stop vocalizing his pleasure. There were no real words, just cries, whimpers, and shouts. His hands were grasping at anything he could find purchase on. Johnny’s arms, the bed, the pillows.

Johnny’s knot swelled quickly, and he looped his free arms under Taeyong’s head to hold him closer and breathed hotly into Taeyong’s ear. Both of Taeyong’s hands came up to grab his forearm, and he finally managed to whimper out.

“A- _ alpha _ ,” and Johnny gripped Taeyong’s thigh tighter and pushed himself in completely. He wasn’t even fully filled out yet, but he could hear Taeyong appreciate it either way, and Johnny felt the velvety heat of Taeyong’s walls around every inch of him, and he ground into Taeyong with wild abandon, chasing his orgasm, seeking to fill the omega up completely.

Taeyong’s whines got higher as Johnny’s knot grew within him and the alpha’s thrusts got more desperate, his jaw clenched and sweat starting to bead down his neck and back. Taeyong’s skin, pressed against his torso, was so hot and dewy, and the smell of him coming off in waves was causing delirium in Johnny’s mind.

He felt his own pleasure rising as his orgasm approached, and Johnny let go of Taeyong’s thigh to reach around and touch his lovers cock. When Johnny’s hands wrapped around his sticky, but still hard shaft, Taeyong’s legs tensed again and he dug his fingers into Johnny’s arm. The bed was pounding against the wall, and Johnny was thankful they were in a house and not an apartment, sharing walls with neighbors. 

He felt Taeyong’s cock and entrance gush around him and Taeyong let out a long scream of satisfaction. Johnny felt his orgasm break a moment after.

He growled heavily as his hips pounded into Taeyong, who had cum so much in the last fifteen minutes that the tension in every fiber of his body had relaxed for a while, and Johnny could feel his lover become a puddle of sweat and heat in his hold. Johnny finally pushed Taeyong’s leg back down to the bed and lay partially over his omega as he continued lazy thrusts to milk his orgasm, his hips and pelvis covered in Taeyong’s lovely slick. 

His arms and legs relaxed and his cock pulsed weakly deep inside of Taeyong’s heat, filling him up, and riding the last waves of his incredible orgasm.

Johnny listened to Taeyong’s soft breaths and he lifted his head slightly to kiss the omega’s shoulders. He felt taeyong relax even farther, his grip on his arms softening and his back relax. After a moment he nosed his lips to Taeyong’s ear.

“Why aren’t your wearing your leg brace?” he breathed into Taeyong’s ear.

“The doctor said…” Taeyong huffed out slowly, “that I could take it off when I’m in bed now…” he answered and Johnny kissed the back of his neck.

“When did you eat last, love?” Johnny murmured again.

“I don’t know…” Taeyong whispered.

“Did you eat anything today?” the alpha asked again, his voice dropping to match Taeyong’s hushed tone.

“...No,” Taeyong finally answered, his breath leaving his body and Johnny felt him deflate. He kissed Taeyong’s shoulders sweetly.

“I’m hungry too. In a little while, I’m going to get us something from the kitchen,” he promised and Taeyong protested with a moan, curling his arms around Johnny’s. 

Even though it was so hot, Johnny had just gotten there and he couldn’t be separated from him. The idea of Johnny leaving him made his eyes start to water and he buried his face into the blankets so he could hide his tears.

Taeyong could feel Johnny’s cock slowly soften inside of him and he gasped in desperation and heartbreak when Johnny slowly pulled out, severing their intimate connection. Taeyong’s fingers clung to Johnny’s arms, and he shook his head.

“No, no, no…” he murmured as Johnny pulled himself onto his hands and knees, and off of Taeyong, “Don’t… don’t leave…” he cried and looked up at Johnny. The alpha’s eyes were confused and full of concern, his hair was wet with sweat as his body rose over Taeyong and the omega grappled at his hands, begging him to stay.

“I’m not leaving,” Johnny’s voice cooed. He remembered Taeyong telling him he’d get like this, but it was a sight to see when Taeyong was crumbling with the idea of Johnny leaving, even if it was just for a little while, “I’ll only be gone a minute. I’ll be right back, and then I promise you, I won’t leave this bed,” he said and he bent down to kiss Taeyong on the lips once more, “Your brain is a little fuzzy right now, but you need to eat,” he reminded his lover and Taeyong whimpered as Johnny pulled away, his hands following his retreat, “I’ll be right back,” he repeated, and walked out of the room, his heart aching as Taeyong let out a small sob.

Johnny quickly went to the kitchen and opened the fridge. Taeyong really had meal prepped and there was filled tupperware on every shelf. He grabbed rice and some sort of pulled meat and threw some of it into a large bowl for the two of them to share. While that heated in the microwave, Johnny poured them a two large cups of ice water and got out two spoons.

When he returned to the bedroom, Taeyong’s face was ruddy with tears and fear, and Johnny remained as calm as he could as he set the bowl on the bed and the water on the bedside table, before he got back into the bed and put the bowl of shared food on a pillow on his stomach so they two of them could share it. He put his arm around Taeyong, who instantly curled up into his side, his tears receding, and Johnny urged him to eat.

Taeyong picked at it, but Johnny assured him and bargained with him to eat more. It almost felt like coddling a child who didn’t want to eat their vegetables. 

“One more bite,” Johnny pressed, saying that line for a third time and Taeyong whined but ate anyway. Johnny was mesmerized by how needy Taeyong became on his heat, how he folded himself fully into Johnny’s side, and he smiled when Taeyong pushed the bowl of food away and Johnny made him drink water before they settled back into bed together.

In the gap between when Taeyong’s heat was going to flare up again, they managed to have a small conversation, sharing their time apart with each other. When Johnny shared how much he had missed Taeyong, all talk went out the window again as the older man pushed closer.

“I missed you so much,” Taeyong broke again and within minutes Johnny was back inside of Taeyong’s wet sex.

Although Johnny didn’t want to put Taeyong on his knees, Taeyong put himself in that position, and Johnny felt something shut off in his brain when he knelt up behind Taeyong and looked down at the lewd scene. The black haired omega he had coveted for months, face down, hips up, back arched, and hole dripping with delicious, fragrant slick and the smell of his own cum still deep inside his lover. It was an intoxicating mixture that reaffirmed in his mind how right this union was, and how worth it was to wait for him.

Johnny’s cock twitched back to life, and this time Johnny could last much,  _ much  _ longer. 

He wasn’t as rushed, impatient to fill and finish, this time his thrusts were calculated, slower, but still with force to make Taeyong’s whole frame shudder. He loved how wrecked Taeyong’s face was, his hair a tousled, wet mess, his moans and cries loud and unabashed, his lovely hands gripping the bed.

Johnny couldn’t count how many time she made Taeyong cum, but he was determined to wring every last ounce of pleasure from the omega’s body before he came, knowing that he would have to wait longer than a half hour after this round.

The sounds of Taeyong’s calls, the wet slapping as their bodies met in fevered tempo, and the gorgeous sight of Taeyong’s long spine, tiny waist, and jutted shoulder blades shining with sweat was something that made Johnny thankful, and he appreciated and savored every second of it. He took in the details of Taeyong’s bottom lip, shining with saliva as he drooled unconsciously onto the bed, and the small moles like a constellation on his back, the tiny dimples above the swell of his ass, his ass itself looked like a perfect valentine to Johnny.

He leaned down and kissed Taeyong’s back, he needed to show his tender affection even in a moment that was so much more carnal than innocent, and Taeyong let out a lovely whine deep in his throat.

Johnny smirked into Taeyong’s shoulder and opened his mouth to bite the omega’s skin softly and he felt Taeyong lock up under him again, his legs spread a little wider and his whole body convulsed as he screamed into the blankets, cumming once again.

Johnny forced Taeyong’s body into the bed, making him lay on his stomach completely, and he was able to get more of Taeyong’s sensitive spots with his mouth, teeth, and tongue while keeping up his tempo.

By the time Johnny had knotted and came for a second time, Taeyong was once more reduced to a satisfied puddle, and he had multiple bite marks all over his shoulders, back, and neck.

Johnny kissed him, held him close, not giving half a care about how sticky and hot they were. He suggested a shower, and changing over the sheets, but he got no response from Taeyong.

“Baby?” Johnny murmured into his ear and he raised his head to see that Taeyong had crashed, fallen into sleep, his lips parted and his cheeks pink. His breathing was even and his skin wasn’t as uncomfortably warm as before, nad Johnny felt proud, happy, and full of love as he looked down at Taeyong’s serene face.

Johnny chuckled lightly to himself as he swept back Taeyong’s hair with his fingers, kissed his cheek once more, and  settled down himself half draped over Taeyong.

 

~

 

Day two, Johnny couldn’t get Taeyong to leave the bed, even though the red blanket they were laying on was filthy, and if Taeyong was in his right mind he would have agreed with Johnny.

On day three, Johnny was able to get Taeyong into the bathtub after lots of bargaining, and while Taeyong was sitting in a lukewarm bath with some sweet smelling soap, Johnny was able to strip the soiled blanket from the bed and throw it into the washing machine. He found a new blanket in the closet in the hall and redressed the bed before Joining Taeyong in the bath.

The tub wasn’t all that big, but the two of them fit in it just fine. Johnny rather liked feeling Taeyong melt against him and being able to wash his lover with his hands while they relaxed and recharged for a little. Johnny loved taking care of Taeyong like this. With his healing injury coupled with his heat, Johnny got to wash him, dry him with a fluffy towel, carry him back to the now clean bed, bring him food and water, make sure he was feeling alright, and comfortable.

He never knew he’d enjoy being this doting towards someone until he met Taeyong.

Days four and five were filled with enjoyment and love-making, as Taeyong’s heat was less intense and the two of them could enjoy a little bit longer of breaks in between Taeyong’s frantic need. Taeyong had more of an appetite and wanted pizza delivered to the house and Johnny was more than happy to comply, thankful that Taeyong was more keen on food, because it felt like pulling teeth to get him to stop and eat during the earliest days of his heat.

By day six, Taeyongs skin was considerably less flushed, and his voice was much less whiny and cute. Finally by day seven, a full week, Taeyong woke up back to usual and the thick smell of cinnamon rolls had dissipated.

Johnny kissed Taeyong awake, delighted at the timing of Taeyong’s faded heat. When Taeyong opened his eyes on the first of July, completely back to normal, Johnny was the first person to wish him a happy birthday.

 

~

 

By the end of the Summer, Johnny had almost completely moved into Taeyong’s house.

It was hilarious, because at first, Taeyong had just suggested Johnny keeping some clothes over at his place, and Taeyong cleaned out two drawers in his closet for Johnny to keep some sweats, shirts, and underwear in. After a few more weeks, Taeyong had cleared out a good chunk of space on the racks, and Johnny had more than half of his wardrobe at Taeyong’s place.

Johnny never thought he would enjoy standing behind the couch with Taeyong, watching a show, as they folded and sorted through their mixed, clean laundry together.

Johnny felt like a guest in his grandma’s house again, and felt more at home in Taeyong’s. He had to spend a few days on a family trip with his aunt and grandma when they went to the beach, and Johnny and his aunt kept suggesting that Grandma move in with Auntie.

Finally, after much discussion and mild arguing, it was decided that Johnny’s aunt would move in with his grandmother in her old house. Johnny helped them move things around in the house, get rid of old things that were never going to be used, clean out the closets filled with old clothes that would never fit again, and returned Johnny’s upstairs bedroom back into the storage room.

His grandma joked that Johnny’s new boyfriend should come over and help them move, and Johnny laughed and said that Taeyong’s foot wasn’t quite healed enough to help them move, but that he promised that they would come over for dinner soon.

Johnny could smell Taeyong’s nerves when they pulled up to Johnny’s grandma’s house together and Johnny kissed his fingers.

“It’s going to be fine,” Johnny said again.

“What if they find out?” Taeyong asked.

“Neither of them have met you before, and when my grandma met you, she thought you were a student. You look young enough to be, babe,” Johnny reasoned, holding Taeyong’s hand, “We met in school. It’s not a lie. We don’t have to tell them you were my teacher,’ Johnny explained, “We can tell them that in ten years, or never. They don’t have to know about our business.”

“It still is weird for me that  _ Jaehyun  _ knows,” Taeyong sighed.

“I’ll be right here, Yong,” Johnny said, slipping into calling him pet names, “You’ll be next to me the whole night, and I promise, my family won’t eat you.”

Taeyong smiled at him after taking a calming breath and they shared a quaint, reassuring kiss before they got out of the car. Taeyong insisted on carrying in the cake he had made for the occasion, and when Johnny opened the front door, his grandma scolded him for not carrying the cake for his boyfriend and Johnny threw Taeyong a pointed look and took the cake box from his hands, his aunt and grandmother immediately cooing over him.

 

~

~

 

Every morning Johnny woke up beside Taeyong was a blessing, and he never stopped being thankful for his mate, and his life.

The end of the summer had Taeyong heading back to work, and Johnny loved seeing his outfit for the day, kissing him goodbye at the door in his pajamas, and promising to miss him while he was gone.

Johnny had a couple weeks before college started and he enjoyed the moments of quiet where he got to collect himself in the solitude of their home before he started his new schedule of being a full time student again.

“You almost ready?” Jaehyun asked as Johnny came out of the office, the second bedroom in Taeyong’s house that had his computer, his shelves of books, and Johnny’s camera and picture collages. He was wearing jeans, and a flannel with the sleeves rolled up, and he was checking his camera to make sure it was charged for the day.

Jaehyun was standing in the living room, waiting for Johnny to hurry up and get himself together so they could go. The two of them had planned a day trip out to the University of Performing Arts in Seoul. College classes didn’t start for another week, but Johnny and Jaehyun decided they were going to go out and take a self-tour of the campus, so that they wouldn’t look totally lost when they started class the following week.

Johnny was going to be a classical music major with a focus on the piano, under the tutelage of a professor highly talked up by Boa Kwon, and Jaehyun was going to be a performing arts major, and would be joining the choir.

“Do you want a water before we go?” Johnny asked as he walked into the kitchen really quick.

“Sure, thanks,” Jaehyun said and Johnny opened the refrigerator to grab two water bottles, when he spotted Taeyong’s large lunchbox. The compartments shut, and the forgotten meal left in the fridge that Taeyong hadn’t grabbed when he rushed out the door this morning.

“Oh no,” Johnny sighed, “Taeyong forgot his lunch at home…” he mused and he picked up the lunchbox. It felt heavy, and Johnny knew that Taeyong would lament about having to eat the cafeteria food at the high school, knowing his perfectly prepared lunch was sitting at home, neglected, “... do you mind if we stop by the high school, so I can give it to him?” Johnny asked, and Jaehyun smiled.

“Yeah, man. That’s really sweet of you to want to do that,” he said and Jaehyun pulled his car keys out of his pocket. Johnny took the two water bottles, and the lunchbox with him out the door, locking the house up as he left.

When they got in the car Johnny texted Taeyong saying that he forgot his lunch, but that Johnny was making a special delivery for him, and added a heart emoji to the end of his sentence.

“Do Mark and Haechan and the rest of them know…?” Jaehyun asked Johnny.

“Nope, just you and Doyoung. I want to tell people, and let them know why I’ve been so busy this summer, but the timing has never been right, and I know if I tell Ten, then like,  _ everyone  _ is going to find out overnight,” Johnny explained.

“So are you just going to leave it at the office, or…?” Jaehyun prompted as they traveled down the road to the highway.

“No, I’ll walk it to his classroom. He’s in the same room as last year,” Johnny mused and Jaehyun smiled.

“You’re going to cause a scene, you know that right?” Jaehyun teased.

“ _ Noooo _ ,” Johnny said, but held back a smile, “I’ll be in and out, super quick.”

“ _ Okay _ ,” Jaehyun said with a shit-eating grin, “if that’s what you think.”

They pulled up to the school, driving through the front gates and Jaehyun found a temporary parking space out front, and parked the car.

“You wanna come in with me?” Johnny asked as Jaehyun withdraw the keys from the ignition, and Johnny took Taeyong’s lunch from the back seat.

“Yeah, of course. Mark and Lucas are in Taeyong’s class,” he said, “it’ll be fun to say hello, and hear them lose their shit,” he added, his cheeky smile never leaving his face. The two of them walked through the front door and Johnny felt nostalgia at walking past the walls lined with lockers and the tiled floors.

“Does it feel smaller to you?” Johnny asked.

“Dude, it’s been three months,” Jaehyun laughed, “It’s not that different.”

“I think it will be once we start college for real,” Johnny said and Jaehyun shrugged and followed Johnny down the halls to their familiar senior year homeroom. Johnny grinned at Jaehyun, his heart pounding as he knocked on Taeyong’s classroom door, waited a moment, and then entered.

The smell of Taeyong’s classroom brought back memories, and the sounds of happiness and familiarity from the students as Johnny Suh walked through the door made Johnny grin. Jaehyun stayed in the doorway as Johnny walked a few step inside. Johnny glanced at Taeyong and smiled at him. Taeyong was in black slacks and a white button up with a tie, and he had taken off his suit jacket and left it on the chair behind his desk. His rolled up sleeves made him look handsome, and he smiled at Johnny as his mate entered, taking a pause in the lesson.

“Hyung!” Mark called and Johnny found him sitting in a desk near the front, “What are you doing here?” he asked.

“Oh, uh,” Johnny started and glanced back at Jaehyun, who’s dimples were so prominent from his amusement, “I’m here to drop off lunch for my boyfriend,” Johnny explained, and the class broke out in whispers and Lucas from the back of the class made a face of astonishment.

“Who are you dating?” he asked, and Johnny said nothing as Taeyong walked over to him and took the lunchbox from his hands.

“Thank you, love,” Taeyong murmured and he pushed himself onto his toes to give Johnny a grateful kiss on the cheek and the classroom promptly  _ exploded _ .

“Oh my  _ God _ !!”  “ _ What _ ?”  “When did this  _ happen _ !?” 

Mark leapt up from his seat, his chair clattering backwards onto the floor, his eyes wide and his mouth open as he pointed at the two of them.

“ _ What the fuck _ !?” Mark screeched in English, and Taeyong snapped around to look at him.

“Mark!  _ Language _ !” Taeyong yelled over the rest of the students and Johnny laughed deeply from his stomach, looking at all the underclassmen staring at the two of them like they had just murdered someone in front of them. A few female students let out distraught noises, and Taeyong was trying to settle everyone down and Johnny just winked at Mark, and then turned to leave the room.

“ _ WHAT THE FUCK _ !?” Mark’s voice could be heard again as Johnny and Jaehyun left the room, grinning, and then Taeyong’s voice followed them.

“Mark Lee, if you don’t sit down right now, I will send you to the principal's office!” Taeyong yelled, and Johnny sent Taeyong an apology text telling him he was sorry for causing the pandemonium, but that he wasn’t all that sorry because that was way too funny and satisfying of a reaction.

Before he could send his text to his mate, he received a text from Ten that said, in all caps: 

‘ _ ARE YOU DATING MR. LEE??????? _ ’ and Johnny chuckled as he showed Jaehyun the text.

“Secret’s out,” Jaehyun laughed, “Told you you’d cause a scene.”

“Yeah,” Johnny said, still so happy anyway, “but, it was time anyway,” Johnny said, and the two of them left the school, still chuckling about it all.

The breeze picked up right as they exited the school building and made their way to Jaehyun’s car, and when they drove away, Johnny glanced back at his old high school. He was once more filled with thankful feelings for his experience; his decision to move to Korea and his arduous year being a former-student to his now-lover, but in the end it had all turned out in his favor.

Johnny was excited now, to start his new life as a college student with his friends and his mate by his side for the long haul.

 

End.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there it is.  
> Thank you all for reading this long ass story, I am so very proud of my brain baby, and it seems to have touched at lot of people's hearts.  
> Look out for more things from me for the NCT fandom. I have many many tricks up my sleeves. Including... an epilogue ;)  
> Please review. Since it's May, I will also say good luck on your exams, finals, and projects.  
> Much love, Copper


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